Sullivan, Arthur
The Mikado
Full Libretto
Source
ACT I.
ACT II.
ACT I.
PEEP-BO
—
Courtyardkˈɔːtjɑːd
ofˈɒv
Ko-Ko's
Palacepˈælɪs
inˈɪn
Titipu
.
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
noblesnˈəʊbəlz
discovereddɪskˈʌvəd
standingstˈændɪŋ
andˈænd
sittingsˈɪtɪŋ
inˈɪn
attitudesˈætɪtjˌuːdz
suggestedsədʒˈɛstɪd
bybˈaɪ
nativenˈeɪtɪv
drawingsdɹˈɔːɹɪŋz
.
CHORUS OF NOBLES
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
wantwˈɒnt
totˈuː
knownˈəʊ
whohˈuː
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
,
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
ofˈɒv
Japandʒəpˈæn
:
Onˈɒn
manymˈɛni
a
vasevˈɑːz
andˈænd
jardʒˈɑː
—
Onˈɒn
manymˈɛni
a
screenskɹˈiːn
andˈænd
fanfˈæn
,
Wewˈiː
figurefˈɪɡɐ
inˈɪn
livelylˈaɪvli
paintpˈeɪnt
:
Ourˈaʊə
attitude's
queerkwˈiə
andˈænd
quaintkwˈeɪnt
—
You're
wrongɹˈɒŋ
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
itˈɪt
ain't
,
ohˈəʊ
!
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
workedwˈɜːkt
bybˈaɪ
stringsstɹˈɪŋz
,
Likelˈaɪk
a
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
marionettemˌæɹɪəʊnˈɛt
,
Youjˈuː
don't
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
theseðˈiːz
thingsθˈɪŋz
:
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
simplysˈɪmpli
Courtkˈɔːt
etiquetteˈɛtɪkˌɛt
.
Perhapspəhˈæps
youjˈuː
supposesʌpˈəʊz
thisðˈɪs
throngθɹˈɒŋ
Can't
keepkˈiːp
itˈɪt
upˈʌp
allˈɔːl
daydˈeɪ
longlˈɒŋ
?
Ifˈɪf
that's
yourjˈɔː
ideaaɪdˈiə
,
you're
wrongɹˈɒŋ
,
ohˈəʊ
!
Enter Nanki-Poo in great excitement.
CHORUS OF NOBLES
Heˈhiː
carrieskˈæɹɪz
a
nativenˈeɪtɪv
guitarɡɪtˈɑː
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
backbˈæk
andˈænd
a
bundlebˈʌndəl
ofˈɒv
balladsbˈælədz
inˈɪn
hishˈɪz
handhˈænd
.
NANKI-POO
Gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
,
I
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
Wherewˈeə
a
gentledʒˈɛntəl
maidenmˈeɪdən
dwelleth
,
Namednˈeɪmd
Yum-Yum
,
theðə
wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
Ko-Ko
?
Inˈɪn
pitypˈɪti
speakspˈiːk
,
ohˈəʊ
speakspˈiːk
I
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
!
A NOBLE
Whywˈaɪ
,
whohˈuː
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
whohˈuː
askˈɑːsk
thisðˈɪs
questionkwˈɛstʃən
?
NANKI-POO
Comekˈʌm
gatherɡˈæðɐ
roundɹˈaʊnd
memˈiː
,
andˈænd
I'll
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
.
SONGsˈɒŋ
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
—
NANKI-POO
.
A
wanderingwˈɒndəɹɪŋ
minstrelmˈɪnstɹəl
I
—
A
thingθˈɪŋ
ofˈɒv
shredsʃɹˈɛdz
andˈænd
patchespˈætʃɪz
,
Ofˈɒv
balladsbˈælədz
,
songssˈɒŋz
andˈænd
snatchessnˈætʃɪz
,
Andˈænd
dreamydɹˈiːmi
lullabylˈʌləbˌaɪ
!
Mymˈaɪ
cataloguekˈætɐlˌɒɡ
isˈɪz
longlˈɒŋ
,
Throughθɹˈuː
everyˈɛvɹi
passionpˈæʃən
rangingɹˈeɪndʒɪŋ
,
Andˈænd
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
humourshjˈuːməz
changingtʃˈeɪndʒɪŋ
I
tunetjˈuːn
mymˈaɪ
supplesˈʌpəl
songsˈɒŋ
!
Areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
inˈɪn
sentimentalsˌɛntɪmˈɛntəl
moodmˈuːd
?
I'll sigh with you,
NANKI-POO
Ohˈəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
!
Onˈɒn
maiden's
coldnesskˈəʊldnəs
dodə
youjˈuː
broodbɹˈuːd
?
I'll
dodə
sosˈəʊ
,
tootˈuː
—
Ohˈəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
!
I'll
charmtʃˈɑːm
yourjˈɔː
willingwˈɪlɪŋ
earsˈiəz
Withwˈɪð
songssˈɒŋz
ofˈɒv
lovers'
fearsfˈiəz
,
Whilewˈaɪl
sympatheticsˌɪmpəθˈɛtɪk
tearstɪɹz
Mymˈaɪ
cheekstʃˈiːks
bedewbɪdjˈuː
—
Ohˈəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
,
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
!
Butbˈʌt
ifˈɪf
patrioticpˌætɹɪˈɒtɪk
sentimentsˈɛntɪmənt
isˈɪz
wantedwˈɒntɪd
,
I've
patrioticpˌætɹɪˈɒtɪk
balladsbˈælədz
cutkˈʌt
andˈænd
drieddɹˈaɪd
;
Forfˈɔː
where'er
ourˈaʊə
country's
bannerbˈænɐ
maymˈeɪ
bebˈiː
plantedplˈæntɪd
,
Allˈɔːl
otherˈʌðɐ
locallˈəʊkəl
bannersbˈænəz
areə(ɹ)
defieddɪfˈaɪd
!
Ourˈaʊə
warriorswˈɒɹɪəz
,
inˈɪn
serriedsˈɛɹɪd
ranksɹˈæŋks
assembledɐsˈɛmbəld
,
Nevernˈɛvɐ
quailkwˈeɪl
—
orˈɔː
theyðˈeɪ
concealkənsˈiːl
itˈɪt
ifˈɪf
theyðˈeɪ
dodə
—
Andˈænd
I
shouldn't
bebˈiː
surprisedsəpɹˈaɪzd
ifˈɪf
nationsnˈeɪʃənz
trembledtɹˈɛmbəld
Beforebɪfˈɔː
theðə
mightymˈaɪti
troopstɹˈuːps
ofˈɒv
Titipu
!
CHORUS
Wewˈiː
shouldn't
bebˈiː
surprisedsəpɹˈaɪzd
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
NANKI-POO
Andˈænd
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
callkˈɔːl
forfˈɔː
a
songsˈɒŋ
ofˈɒv
theðə
seasˈiː
,
We'll
heavehˈiːv
theðə
capstankˈæpstən
roundɹˈaʊnd
,
Withwˈɪð
a
yeojəʊ
heavehˈiːv
hohˈəʊ
,
forfˈɔː
theðə
windwɪnd
isˈɪz
freefɹˈiː
,
Herhˈɜː
anchor's
a-trip
andˈænd
herhˈɜː
helm's
a-lee
,
Hurrahhəɹˈɑː
forfˈɔː
theðə
homewardhˈəʊmwəd
boundbˈaʊnd
!
CHORUS
Yeo-ho
—
heavehˈiːv
hohˈəʊ
—
Hurrahhəɹˈɑː
forfˈɔː
theðə
homewardhˈəʊmwəd
boundbˈaʊnd
!
Totˈuː
laylˈeɪ
aloftɐlˈɒft
inˈɪn
a
howlinghˈaʊlɪŋ
breezebɹˈiːz
Maymˈeɪ
tickletˈɪkəl
a
landsman's
tastetˈeɪst
,
Butbˈʌt
theðə
happiesthˈæpɪəst
hourˈaʊə
a
sailorsˈeɪlɐ
seessˈiːz
Isˈɪz
whenwˈɛn
he's
downdˈaʊn
Atˈæt
anˈɐn
inlandˈɪnlənd
towntˈaʊn
,
Withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
Nancyˈnænsi
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
kneesnˈiːz
,
yeojəʊ
hohˈəʊ
!
Andˈænd
hishˈɪz
armˈɑːm
aroundɐɹˈaʊnd
herhˈɜː
waistwˈeɪst
!
Thenðˈɛn
manmˈæn
theðə
capstankˈæpstən
—
offˈɒf
wewˈiː
goɡˈəʊ
,
Asəz
theðə
fiddlerfˈɪdlɐ
swingsswˈɪŋz
usˈʌs
roundɹˈaʊnd
,
Withwˈɪð
a
yeojəʊ
heavehˈiːv
hohˈəʊ
,
Andˈænd
a
rumɹˈʌm
belowbɪlˈəʊ
,
Hurrahhəɹˈɑː
forfˈɔː
theðə
homewardhˈəʊmwəd
boundbˈaʊnd
!
A
wanderingwˈɒndəɹɪŋ
minstrelmˈɪnstɹəl
I
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Enter Pish-Tush.
PISH-TUSH
Andˈænd
whatwˈɒt
maymˈeɪ
bebˈiː
yourjˈɔː
businessbˈɪznəs
withwˈɪð
Yum-Yum
?
NANKI-POO
I'll
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
.
A
yearjˈiə
agoɐɡˈəʊ
I
waswˈɒz
a
membermˈɛmbɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Titipu
towntˈaʊn
bandbˈænd
.
It was my duty to take the cap round for
NANKI-POO
contributionskˌɒntɹɪbjˈuːʃənz
.
Whilewˈaɪl
dischargingdɪstʃˈɑːdʒɪŋ
thisðˈɪs
delicatedˈɛlɪkət
officeˈɒfɪs
,
I
sawsˈɔː
YUM-YUM
Wewˈiː
lovedlˈʌvd
eachˈiːtʃ
otherˈʌðɐ
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
,
butbˈʌt
sheʃˈiː
waswˈɒz
betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
totˈuː
herhˈɜː
guardianɡˈɑːdiən
Ko-Ko
,
a
cheaptʃˈiːp
tailortˈeɪlɐ
,
andˈænd
I
sawsˈɔː
thatðˈæt
mymˈaɪ
suitsˈuːt
waswˈɒz
hopelesshˈəʊpləs
.
Overwhelmedˌəʊvəwˈɛlmd
withwˈɪð
despairdɪspˈeə
,
I
quittedkwˈɪtɪd
theðə
towntˈaʊn
.
Judgedʒˈʌdʒ
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
delightdɪlˈaɪt
whenwˈɛn
I
heardhˈɜːd
,
a
monthmˈʌnθ
agoɐɡˈəʊ
,
thatðˈæt
Ko-Ko
hadhˈæd
beenbˈiːn
con-
demned
totˈuː
deathdˈɛθ
forfˈɔː
flirtingflˈɜːtɪŋ
!
I
hurriedhˈʌɹɪd
backbˈæk
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
,
inˈɪn
theðə
hopehˈəʊp
ofˈɒv
findingfˈaɪndɪŋ
Yum-Yum
atˈæt
libertylˈɪbəti
totˈuː
listenlˈɪsən
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
protestationspɹətɪstˈeɪʃənz
.
PISH-TUSH
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
truetɹˈuː
thatðˈæt
Ko-Ko
waswˈɒz
condemnedkəndˈɛmd
totˈuː
deathdˈɛθ
forfˈɔː
flirtingflˈɜːtɪŋ
,
butbˈʌt
heˈhiː
waswˈɒz
reprievedɹɪpɹˈiːvd
atˈæt
theðə
lastlˈɑːst
momentmˈəʊmənt
,
andˈænd
raisedɹˈeɪzd
totˈuː
theðə
exaltedɛɡzˈɒltɪd
rankɹˈæŋk
ofˈɒv
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
underˈʌndɐ
theðə
followingfˈɒləʊɪŋ
remarkableɹɪmˈɑːkəbəl
circumstancessˈɜːkəmstˌænsɪz
:
SONGsˈɒŋ
—
PISH-TUSH
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
.
Ourˈaʊə
greatɡɹˈeɪt
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
,
virtuousvˈɜːtʃuːəs
manmˈæn
,
Whenwˈɛn
heˈhiː
totˈuː
ruleɹˈuːl
ourˈaʊə
landlˈænd
beganbɪɡˈæn
,
Resolvedɹɪˈzɑlvd
totˈuː
trytɹˈaɪ
A
planplˈæn
wherebywˈeəbaɪ
Youngjˈʌŋ
menmˈɛn
mightmˈaɪt
bestbˈɛst
bebˈiː
steadiedstˈɛdɪd
.
Sosˈəʊ
heˈhiː
decreeddɪkɹˈiːd
,
inˈɪn
wordswˈɜːdz
succinctsəksˈɪŋkt
,
Thatðˈæt
allˈɔːl
whohˈuː
flirtedflˈɜːtɪd
,
leeredlˈiəd
orˈɔː
winkedwˈɪŋkt
(
Unlessʌnlˈɛs
connubially
linkedlˈɪŋkt
),
Shouldʃˈʊd
forthwithfˈɔːθwɪθ
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
.
Andˈænd
I
expectɛkspˈɛkt
you'll
allˈɔːl
agreeɐɡɹˈiː
Thatðˈæt
heˈhiː
waswˈɒz
rightɹˈaɪt
totˈuː
sosˈəʊ
decreedɪkɹˈiː
.
Andˈænd
I
aməm
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
rightɹˈaɪt
asəz
rightɹˈaɪt
cankˈæn
bebˈiː
!
CHORUS
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
.
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
Thisðˈɪs
stemstˈɛm
decreedɪkɹˈiː
,
you'll
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
,
Causedkˈɔːzd
greatɡɹˈeɪt
dismaydɪsmˈeɪ
throughoutθɹuːˈaʊt
theðə
landlˈænd
!
Forfˈɔː
youngjˈʌŋ
andˈænd
oldˈəʊld
Andˈænd
shyʃˈaɪ
andˈænd
boldbˈəʊld
Werewˈɜː
equallyˈiːkwəli
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
.
Theðə
youthjˈuːθ
whohˈuː
winkedwˈɪŋkt
a
rovingɹˈəʊvɪŋ
eyeˈaɪ
,
Or breathed a non-connubial sigh,
CHORUS
Waswˈɒz
thereuponðeəɹˈʌpɒn
condemnedkəndˈɛmd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
—
Heˈhiː
usuallyjˈuːʒuːəli
objectedɒbdʒˈɛktɪd
.
Andˈænd
you'll
allowɐlˈaʊ
,
asəz
I
expectɛkspˈɛkt
,
Thatðˈæt
heˈhiː
waswˈɒz
rightɹˈaɪt
totˈuː
sosˈəʊ
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
.
Andˈænd
I
aməm
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
isˈɪz
quitekwaɪt
correctkəɹˈɛkt
!
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Andˈænd
sosˈəʊ
wewˈiː
straightstɹˈeɪt
letlˈɛt
outˈaʊt
onˈɒn
bailbˈeɪl
A
convictkənˈvɪkt
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
countykˈaʊnti
jaildʒˈeɪl
,
Whosehˈuːz
headhˈɛd
waswˈɒz
nextnˈɛkst
Onˈɒn
somesˈʌm
pretextpɹˈiːtɛkst
Condemnedkəndˈɛmd
totˈuː
bebˈiː
mownmˈəʊn
offˈɒf
,
Andˈænd
mademˈeɪd
himhˈɪm
Headsmanhˈɛdzmən
,
forfˈɔː
wewˈiː
saidsˈɛd
,
"
Who's
nextnˈɛkst
totˈuː
bebˈiː
decapited
Cannotˈkænɒt
cutkˈʌt
offˈɒf
another's
headhˈɛd
Untilʌntˈɪl
he's
cutkˈʌt
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
offˈɒf
.
"
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
you'll
saysˈeɪ
,
Totˈuː
argueˈɑːɡjuː
inˈɪn
thisðˈɪs
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
waywˈeɪ
;
Andˈænd
I
aməm
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
rightɹˈaɪt
—
too-looral-lay
!
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
rightɹˈaɪt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Exeunt
CHORUS
Choruskˈɔːɹəs
.
Enter Pooh-Bah.
NANKI-POO
Ko-Ko
,
theðə
cheaptʃˈiːp
tailortˈeɪlɐ
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
ofˈɒv
Titipu
!
Whywˈaɪ
,
that's
theðə
highesthˈaɪəst
rankɹˈæŋk
a
citizensˈɪtɪzən
cankˈæn
attainɐtˈeɪn
!
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
.
Ourˈaʊə
logicallˈɒdʒɪkəl
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
,
seeingsˈiːɪŋ
nonəʊ
moralmˈɒɹəl
differencedˈɪfɹəns
betweenbɪtwˈiːn
theðə
dignifieddˈɪɡnɪfˌaɪd
judgedʒˈʌdʒ
whohˈuː
condemnskəndˈɛmz
a
criminalkɹˈɪmɪnəl
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
,
andˈænd
theðə
industriousɪndˈʌstɹɪəs
mechanicmɪkˈænɪk
whohˈuː
carrieskˈæɹɪz
outˈaʊt
theðə
sentencesˈɛntəns
,
hashˈæz
rolledɹˈəʊld
theðə
twotˈuː
officesˈɒfɪsɪz
intoˈɪntʊ
onewˈɒn
,
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
judgedʒˈʌdʒ
isˈɪz
nownˈaʊ
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
howhˈaʊ
goodɡˈʊd
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
(
forfˈɔː
I
seesˈiː
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
a
noblemannˈəʊbəlmən
ofˈɒv
theðə
highesthˈaɪəst
rankɹˈæŋk
)
totˈuː
condescendkˌɒndɪsˈɛnd
totˈuː
telltˈɛl
allˈɔːl
thisðˈɪs
totˈuː
memˈiː
,
a
meremˈiə
strollingstɹˈəʊlɪŋ
minstrelmˈɪnstɹəl
!
POOH-BAH
Don't
mentionmˈɛnʃən
itˈɪt
.
I am, in point of fact, a
POOH-BAH
particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
haughtyhˈɔːti
andˈænd
exclusiveɛksklˈuːsɪv
personpˈɜːsən
,
ofˈɒv
pre-Adamite
ancestralænsˈɛstɹəl
descentdɪsˈɛnt
.
Youjˈuː
willwˈɪl
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
thisðˈɪs
whenwˈɛn
I
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
thatðˈæt
I
cankˈæn
tracetɹˈeɪs
mymˈaɪ
ancestryˈænsɛstɹi
backbˈæk
totˈuː
a
protoplasmal
primordialpɹɪmˈɔːdɪəl
atomicɐtˈɒmɪk
globuleɡlˈɒbjuːl
.
Consequentlykˈɒnsɪkwəntli
,
mymˈaɪ
familyfˈæmɪli
pridepɹˈaɪd
isˈɪz
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
inconceivableɪnkənsˈiːvəbəl
.
I
can't
helphˈɛlp
itˈɪt
.
I
waswˈɒz
bornbˈɔːn
sneeringsnˈiəɹɪŋ
.
Butbˈʌt
I
strugglestɹˈʌɡəl
hardhˈɑːd
totˈuː
overcomeˌəʊvəkˈʌm
thisðˈɪs
defectˈdiːfɛkt
.
I
mortifymˈɔːtɪfˌaɪ
mymˈaɪ
pridepɹˈaɪd
continuallykəntˈɪnjuːəli
.
Whenwˈɛn
allˈɔːl
theðə
greatɡɹˈeɪt
officersˈɒfɪsəz
ofˈɒv
Statestˈeɪt
resignedɹɪˈzaɪnd
inˈɪn
a
bodybˈɒdi
becausebɪkˈʌz
theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
tootˈuː
proudpɹˈaʊd
totˈuː
servesˈɜːv
underˈʌndɐ
anˈɐn
ex-tailor
,
diddˈɪd
I
notnˈɒt
unhesitatinglyʌnhˈɛsɪtˌeɪtɪŋli
acceptɐksˈɛpt
allˈɔːl
theirðˈeə
postspˈəʊsts
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
?
PISH-TUSH
Andˈænd
theðə
salariessˈæləɹiz
attachedɐtˈætʃt
totˈuː
themðˈɛm
?
Youjˈuː
diddˈɪd
.
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
consequentlykˈɒnsɪkwəntli
mymˈaɪ
degradingdɪɡɹˈeɪdɪŋ
dutydjˈuːti
totˈuː
servesˈɜːv
thisðˈɪs
upstartˈʌpstɑːt
asəz
Firstfˈɜːst
Lordlˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Treasurytɹˈɛʒəɹi
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
,
Commander-in-Chief
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Admiralˈædmɜːɹəl
,
Mastermˈɑːstɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Buckhounds
,
Groomɡɹˈuːm
ofˈɒv
theðə
Backbˈæk
Stairsstˈeəz
,
Archbishopˌɑːtʃbˈɪʃəp
ofˈɒv
Titipu
,
andˈænd
Lordlˈɔːd
Mayormˈeə
,
bothbˈəʊθ
actingˈæktɪŋ
andˈænd
electɪlˈɛkt
,
allˈɔːl
rolledɹˈəʊld
intoˈɪntʊ
onewˈɒn
.
Andˈænd
atˈæt
a
salarysˈæləɹi
!
A
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
paidpˈeɪd
forfˈɔː
hishˈɪz
servicessˈɜːvɪsɪz
!
I
a
salariedsˈæləɹid
minionmˈɪnɪən
!
Butbˈʌt
I
dodə
itˈɪt
!
Itˈɪt
revoltsɹɪvˈəʊlts
memˈiː
,
butbˈʌt
I
dodə
itˈɪt
!
NANKI-POO
Andˈænd
itˈɪt
doesdəz
youjˈuː
creditkɹˈɛdɪt
.
POOH-BAH
Butbˈʌt
I
don't
stopstˈɒp
atˈæt
thatðˈæt
.
I
goɡˈəʊ
andˈænd
dinedˈaɪn
withwˈɪð
middle-class
peoplepˈiːpəl
onˈɒn
reasonableɹˈiːzənəbəl
termstˈɜːmz
.
I
dancedˈɑːns
atˈæt
cheaptʃˈiːp
suburbansəbˈɜːbən
partiespˈɑːtɪz
forfˈɔː
a
moderateˈmɒdəɹət
feefˈiː
.
I
acceptɐksˈɛpt
refreshmentɹɪfɹˈɛʃmənt
atˈæt
anyˈɛni
handshˈændz
,
howeverhaʊˈɛvɐ
lowlylˈəʊli
.
I
alsoˈɒlsəʊ
retailɹˈiːteɪl
Statestˈeɪt
secretssˈiːkɹəts
atˈæt
a
veryvˈɛɹi
lowlˈəʊ
figurefˈɪɡɐ
.
Forfˈɔː
instanceˈɪnstəns
,
anyˈɛni
furtherfˈɜːðɐ
informationˌɪnfəmˈeɪʃən
aboutɐbˈaʊt
Yum-Yum
wouldwˈʊd
comekˈʌm
underˈʌndɐ
theðə
headhˈɛd
ofˈɒv
a
Statestˈeɪt
secretˈsiː.kɹɪt
.
(Nanki-Poo takes his
hint, and gives him money) (Aside) Another insult and, I
POOH-BAH
thinkθˈɪŋk
,
a
lightlˈaɪt
onewˈɒn
!
SONGsˈɒŋ
—
POOH-BAHˈpuːbɑː
withwˈɪð
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
PISH-TUSH
.
Youngjˈʌŋ
manmˈæn
,
despairdɪspˈeə
,
Likewiselˈaɪkwaɪz
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
,
Yum-Yum
theðə
fairfˈeə
Youjˈuː
mustmˈʌst
notnˈɒt
woowˈuː
.
Itˈɪt
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
dodə
:
I'm
sorrysˈɒɹi
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
,
Youjˈuː
veryvˈɛɹi
imperfectɪmpˈɜːfɛkt
ablutioner
!
Thisðˈɪs
veryvˈɛɹi
daydˈeɪ
Fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
Yum-Yum
Willwˈɪl
wendwˈɛnd
herhˈɜː
waywˈeɪ
,
Andˈænd
homewardhˈəʊmwəd
comekˈʌm
,
Withwˈɪð
beatbˈiːt
ofˈɒv
drumdɹˈʌm
Andˈænd
a
rum-tum-tum
,
Totˈuː
wedwˈɛd
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
!
Andˈænd
theðə
brassbɹˈɑːs
willwˈɪl
crashkɹˈæʃ
,
Andˈænd
theðə
trumpetstɹˈʌmpɪts
braybɹˈeɪ
,
Andˈænd
they'll
cutkˈʌt
a
dashdˈæʃ
Onˈɒn
theirðˈeə
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
.
She'll
toddletˈɒdəl
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
asəz
allˈɔːl
averəˈvɜː
,
Withwˈɪð
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
'
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
POOHpˈuː
.
Andˈænd
theðə
brassbɹˈɑːs
willwˈɪl
crashkɹˈæʃ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
It's
a
hopelesshˈəʊpləs
casekˈeɪs
,
Asəz
youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
seesˈiː
,
Andˈænd
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
placeplˈeɪs
Awayɐwˈeɪ
I'd
fleeflˈiː
;
Butbˈʌt
don't
blameblˈeɪm
memˈiː
—
I'm
sorrysˈɒɹi
totˈuː
bebˈiː
Ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
a
diminutioner
.
They'll
vowvˈaʊ
theirðˈeə
pactpˈækt
Extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
soonsˈuːn
,
In point of fact
NANKI-POO
Thisðˈɪs
afternoonˌɑːf.təˈnuːn
.
Herhˈɜː
honeymoonhˈʌnɪmˌuːn
Withwˈɪð
thatðˈæt
buffoonbʌfˈuːn
Atˈæt
sevensˈɛvən
commenceskəmˈɛnsɪz
,
sosˈəʊ
youjˈuː
shunʃˈʌn
herhˈɜː
!
ALL
Andˈænd
theðə
brassbɹˈɑːs
willwˈɪl
crashkɹˈæʃ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Exit
RECIT
—
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
POOH-BAHˈpuːbɑː
.
NANKI-POO
Andˈænd
I
havehəv
journeyeddʒˈɜːnɪd
forfˈɔː
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
orˈɔː
nearlynˈiəli
,
Totˈuː
learnlˈɜːn
thatðˈæt
Yum-Yum
,
whomhˈuːm
I
lovelˈʌv
sosˈəʊ
dearlydˈiəli
,
Thisðˈɪs
daydˈeɪ
totˈuː
Ko-Ko
isˈɪz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
unitedjuːnˈaɪtɪd
!
POOH-BAH
Theðə
factfˈækt
appearsɐpˈiəz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
asəz
you've
recitedɹɪsˈaɪtɪd
:
Butbˈʌt
herehˈiə
heˈhiː
comeskˈʌmz
,
equippedɪkwˈɪpt
asəz
suitssˈuːts
hishˈɪz
stationstˈeɪʃən
;
He'll
giveɡˈɪv
youjˈuː
anyˈɛni
furtherfˈɜːðɐ
informationˌɪnfəmˈeɪʃən
.
[Exeunt Pooh-Bah and
Enter Chorus of Nobles.
NANKI-POO
Beholdbɪhˈəʊld
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
A
personagepˈɜːsənɪdʒ
ofˈɒv
noblenˈəʊbəl
rankɹˈæŋk
andˈænd
titletˈaɪtəl
—
A
dignifieddˈɪɡnɪfˌaɪd
andˈænd
potentpˈəʊtənt
officerˈɒfɪsɐ
,
Whosehˈuːz
functionsfˈʌŋkʃənz
areə(ɹ)
particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
vitalvˈaɪtəl
!
Deferdɪfˈɜː
,
deferdɪfˈɜː
,
Totˈuː
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
!
Enter Ko-Ko attended.
KO-KO
Takentˈeɪkən
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
countykˈaʊnti
jaildʒˈeɪl
Bybˈaɪ
a
setsˈɛt
ofˈɒv
curiouskjˈʊɹɪəs
chancestʃˈɑːnsɪz
;
Liberatedlˈɪbəɹˌeɪtɪd
thenðˈɛn
onˈɒn
bailbˈeɪl
,
Onˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
recognizances
;
Waftedwˈɑːftɪd
bybˈaɪ
a
favouringfˈeɪvɜːɹɪŋ
galeɡˈeɪl
Asəz
onewˈɒn
sometimessˈʌmtaɪmz
isˈɪz
inˈɪn
trancestɹˈɑːnsɪz
,
Totˈuː
a
heighthˈaɪt
thatðˈæt
fewfjˈuː
cankˈæn
scaleskˈeɪl
,
Savesˈeɪv
bybˈaɪ
longlˈɒŋ
andˈænd
wearywˈiəɹi
dancesdˈɑːnsɪz
;
Surelyʃˈɔːli
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
hadhˈæd
a
malemˈeɪl
Underˈʌndɐ
suchsˈʌtʃ
likelˈaɪk
circumstancessˈɜːkəmstˌænsɪz
Sosˈəʊ
adventurousɐdvˈɛntʃəɹəs
a
taletˈeɪl
,
Whichwˈɪtʃ
maymˈeɪ
rankɹˈæŋk
withwˈɪð
mostmˈəʊst
romancesɹəʊmˈænsɪz
.
CHORUS
Deferdɪfˈɜː
,
deferdɪfˈɜː
,
Totˈuː
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
KO
Gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
,
I'm
muchmˈʌtʃ
touchedtˈʌtʃt
bybˈaɪ
thisðˈɪs
receptionɹɪsˈɛpʃən
.
I
cankˈæn
onlyˈəʊnli
trusttɹˈʌst
thatðˈæt
bybˈaɪ
strictstɹˈɪkt
attentionɐtˈɛnʃən
totˈuː
dutydjˈuːti
I
shallʃˈæl
ensureɛnʃˈɔː
a
continuancekəntˈɪnjuːəns
ofˈɒv
thoseðˈəʊz
favoursfˈeɪvəz
whichwˈɪtʃ
itˈɪt
willwˈɪl
everˈɛvɐ
bebˈiː
mymˈaɪ
studystˈʌdi
totˈuː
deservedɪzˈɜːv
.
Ifˈɪf
I
shouldʃˈʊd
everˈɛvɐ
bebˈiː
calledkˈɔːld
uponəpˈɒn
totˈuː
actˈækt
professionallypɹəfˈɛʃənəli
,
I
aməm
happyhˈæpi
totˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
thatðˈæt
thereðˈeə
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
nonəʊ
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
inˈɪn
findingfˈaɪndɪŋ
plentyplˈɛnti
ofˈɒv
peoplepˈiːpəl
whosehˈuːz
losslˈɒs
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
a
distinctdɪstˈɪŋkt
gainɡˈeɪn
totˈuː
societysəsˈaɪəti
atˈæt
largelˈɑːdʒ
.
SONGsˈɒŋ
—
KO-KO
withwˈɪð
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
MENmˈɛn
.
Asəz
somesˈʌm
daydˈeɪ
itˈɪt
maymˈeɪ
happenhˈæpən
thatðˈæt
a
victimvˈɪktɪm
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
foundfˈaʊnd
,
I've
gotɡˈɒt
a
littlelˈɪtəl
listlˈɪst
—
I've
gotɡˈɒt
a
littlelˈɪtəl
listlˈɪst
Ofˈɒv
societysəsˈaɪəti
offendersəfˈɛndəz
whohˈuː
mightmˈaɪt
wellwˈɛl
bebˈiː
undergroundˌʌndəˈɡɹaʊnd
,
Andˈænd
whohˈuː
nevernˈɛvɐ
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
whohˈuː
nevernˈɛvɐ
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
There's
theðə
pestilentialpˌɛstɪlˈɛnʃəl
nuisancesnjˈuːsənsɪz
whohˈuː
writeɹˈaɪt
forfˈɔː
autographsˈɔːtəɡɹˌæfz
—
All people who have flabby hands and irritating laughs—
KO
Allˈɔːl
childrentʃˈɪldɹən
whohˈuː
areə(ɹ)
upˈʌp
inˈɪn
datesdˈeɪts
,
andˈænd
floorflˈɔː
youjˈuː
withwˈɪð
'em
flatflˈæt
—
Allˈɔːl
personspˈɜːsənz
whohˈuː
inˈɪn
shakingʃˈeɪkɪŋ
handshˈændz
,
shakeʃˈeɪk
handshˈændz
withwˈɪð
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
—
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
thirdθˈɜːd
personspˈɜːsənz
whohˈuː
onˈɒn
spoilingspˈɔɪlɪŋ
tte
—
ttes
insistɪnsˈɪst
—
They'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
they'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
CHORUS
He's
gotɡˈɒt
'em
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
—
he's
gotɡˈɒt
'em
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
;
Andˈænd
they'll
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
they'll
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
.
There's
theðə
banjobˈændʒəʊ
serenader
,
andˈænd
theðə
othersˈʌðəz
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
raceɹˈeɪs
,
Andˈænd
theðə
piano-organist
—
I've
gotɡˈɒt
himhˈɪm
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
!
Andˈænd
theðə
peoplepˈiːpəl
whohˈuː
eatˈiːt
peppermintpˈɛpəmˌɪnt
andˈænd
puffpˈʌf
itˈɪt
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
facefˈeɪs
,
Theyðˈeɪ
nevernˈɛvɐ
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
theyðˈeɪ
nevernˈɛvɐ
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
Thenðˈɛn
theðə
idiotˈɪdɪət
whohˈuː
praisespɹˈeɪzɪz
,
withwˈɪð
enthusiasticɛnθjˌuːzɪˈæstɪk
tonetˈəʊn
,
Allˈɔːl
centuriessˈɛntʃəɹɪz
butbˈʌt
thisðˈɪs
,
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
countrykˈʌntɹi
butbˈʌt
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
;
Andˈænd
theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
provincespɹˈɒvɪnsɪz
,
whohˈuː
dressesdɹˈɛsɪz
likelˈaɪk
a
guyɡˈaɪ
,
Andˈænd
whohˈuː
"
doesn't
thinkθˈɪŋk
sheʃˈiː
waltzeswˈɒltsɪz
,
butbˈʌt
wouldwˈʊd
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
trytɹˈaɪ
";
Andˈænd
thatðˈæt
singularsˈɪŋɡjʊlɐ
anomalyɐnˈɒməlˌi
,
theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
novelistnˈɒvɪlˌɪst
—
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
she'd
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
I'm
sureʃˈɔː
she'd
notnˈɒt
heˈhiː
missedmˈɪst
!
He's
gotɡˈɒt
herhˈɜː
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
—
he's
gotɡˈɒt
herhˈɜː
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
;
Andˈænd
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
she'll
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
I'm
sureʃˈɔː
she'll
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
Andˈænd
thatðˈæt
Nisinˈɪsi
Prius
nuisancenjˈuːsəns
,
whohˈuː
justdʒˈʌst
nownˈaʊ
isˈɪz
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
rifeɹˈaɪf
,
Theðə
Judicialdʒuːdˈɪʃəl
humoristhjˈuːmɔːɹˌɪst
—
I've
gotɡˈɒt
himhˈɪm
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
!
Allˈɔːl
funnyfˈʌni
fellowsfˈɛləʊz
,
comickˈɒmɪk
menmˈɛn
,
andˈænd
clownsklˈaʊnz
ofˈɒv
privatepɹˈaɪvət
lifelˈaɪf
—
They'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
they'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
.
Andˈænd
apologeticɐpˌɒlədʒˈɛtɪk
statesmenstˈeɪtsmɛn
ofˈɒv
a
compromisingkˈɒmpɹəmˌaɪzɪŋ
kindkˈaɪnd
,
Suchsˈʌtʃ
asəz
—
Whatwˈɒt
d'ye
callkˈɔːl
himhˈɪm
—
Thing'em-bob
,
andˈænd
likewiselˈaɪkwaɪz
—
Never-mind
,
Andˈænd
'St
—'
stseɪnt
—'
stseɪnt
—
andˈænd
What's-his-name
,
andˈænd
alsoˈɒlsəʊ
You-know-who
—
The task of filling up the blanks I'd rather leave to you.
CHORUS
Butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
reallyɹˈiəli
doesn't
mattermˈætɐ
whomhˈuːm
youjˈuː
putpʊt
uponəpˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
,
Forfˈɔː
they'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
they'd
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
Youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
putpʊt
'em
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
—
youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
putpʊt
'em
onˈɒn
theðə
listlˈɪst
;
Andˈænd
they'll
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
—
they'll
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
'em
bebˈiː
missedmˈɪst
!
Enter Pooh-Bah.
KO
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
,
itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
thatðˈæt
theðə
festivitiesfɛstˈɪvɪtiz
inˈɪn
connectionkənˈɛkʃən
withwˈɪð
mymˈaɪ
approachingɐpɹˈəʊtʃɪŋ
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
mustmˈʌst
lastlˈɑːst
a
weekwˈiːk
.
I
shouldʃˈʊd
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
dodə
itˈɪt
handsomelyhˈændsʌmli
,
andˈænd
I
wantwˈɒnt
totˈuː
consultˈkɒnsʌlt
youjˈuː
asəz
totˈuː
theðə
amountɐmˈaʊnt
I
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
spendspˈɛnd
uponəpˈɒn
themðˈɛm
.
POOH-BAH
Certainlysˈɜːtənli
.
Inˈɪn
whichwˈɪtʃ
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
capacitieskəpˈæsɪtiz
?
Asəz
Firstfˈɜːst
Lordlˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Treasurytɹˈɛʒəɹi
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Chamberlaintʃˈeɪmbəlˌɪn
,
Attorneyɐtˈɜːni
Generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
,
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Exchequerɛkstʃˈɛkɐ
,
Privypɹˈɪvi
Pursepˈɜːs
,
orˈɔː
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
?
KO
Supposesʌpˈəʊz
wewˈiː
saysˈeɪ
asəz
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
.
POOH-BAH
Speakingspˈiːkɪŋ
asəz
yourjˈɔː
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
theðə
citysˈɪti
willwˈɪl
havehəv
totˈuː
paypˈeɪ
forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
,
don't
stintstˈɪnt
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
,
dodə
itˈɪt
wellwˈɛl
.
KO
Exactlyɛɡzˈæktli
—
asəz
theðə
citysˈɪti
willwˈɪl
havehəv
totˈuː
paypˈeɪ
forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
.
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
yourjˈɔː
adviceɐdvˈaɪs
.
POOH-BAH
Asəz
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
.
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
youjˈuː
willwˈɪl
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Exchequerɛkstʃˈɛkɐ
,
I
aməm
boundbˈaʊnd
totˈuː
seesˈiː
thatðˈæt
duedjˈuː
economyɪkˈɒnəmi
isˈɪz
observedɒbzˈɜːvd
.
KO
Ohˈəʊ
!
Butbˈʌt
youjˈuː
saidsˈɛd
justdʒˈʌst
nownˈaʊ
"
Don't
stintstˈɪnt
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
,
dodə
itˈɪt
wellwˈɛl
".
POOH-BAH
Asəz
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
.
KO
Andˈænd
nownˈaʊ
youjˈuː
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
duedjˈuː
economyɪkˈɒnəmi
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
observedɒbzˈɜːvd
.
POOH-BAH
Asəz
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Exchequerɛkstʃˈɛkɐ
.
KO
I
seesˈiː
.
Comekˈʌm
overˈəʊvɐ
herehˈiə
,
wherewˈeə
theðə
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
can't
hearhˈiə
usˈʌs
.
(
Theyðˈeɪ
crosskɹˈɒs
theðə
stagestˈeɪdʒ
)
Nownˈaʊ
,
asəz
mymˈaɪ
Solicitorsəlˈɪsɪtɐ
,
howhˈaʊ
dodə
youjˈuː
adviseɐdvˈaɪz
memˈiː
totˈuː
dealdˈiːl
withwˈɪð
thisðˈɪs
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
?
POOH-BAH
Ohˈəʊ
,
asəz
yourjˈɔː
Solicitorsəlˈɪsɪtɐ
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
havehəv
nonəʊ
hesitationhˌɛsɪtˈeɪʃən
inˈɪn
sayingsˈeɪɪŋ
"
Chancetʃˈɑːns
itˈɪt
——"
KO
Thankθˈæŋk
youjˈuː
.
(
Shakingʃˈeɪkɪŋ
hishˈɪz
handhˈænd
)
I
willwˈɪl
.
POOH-BAH
Ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
werewˈɜː
notnˈɒt
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
Lordlˈɔːd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
,
I
aməm
boundbˈaʊnd
totˈuː
seesˈiː
thatðˈæt
theðə
lawlˈɔː
isn't
violatedvˈaɪəleɪtɪd
.
KO
I
seesˈiː
.
Comekˈʌm
overˈəʊvɐ
herehˈiə
wherewˈeə
theðə
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
can't
hearhˈiə
usˈʌs
.
(
Theyðˈeɪ
crosskɹˈɒs
theðə
stagestˈeɪdʒ
)
Nownˈaʊ
,
thenðˈɛn
,
asəz
Firstfˈɜːst
Lordlˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Treasurytɹˈɛʒəɹi
?
POOH-BAH
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
asəz
Firstfˈɜːst
Lordlˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Treasurytɹˈɛʒəɹi
,
I
couldkˈʊd
proposepɹəpˈəʊz
a
specialspˈɛʃəl
votevˈəʊt
thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
coverkˈʌvɐ
allˈɔːl
expensesɛkspˈɛnsɪz
,
ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
werewˈɜː
notnˈɒt
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
Leaderlˈiːdɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Oppositionˌɒpəzˈɪʃən
,
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
mymˈaɪ
dutydjˈuːti
totˈuː
resistɹɪsˈɪst
itˈɪt
,
toothtˈuːθ
andˈænd
nailnˈeɪl
.
Orˈɔː
,
asəz
Paymasterpˈeɪmɑːstɐ
Generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
,
I
couldkˈʊd
sosˈəʊ
cookkˈʊk
theðə
accountsɐkˈaʊnts
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Auditorˈɔːdɪtɐ
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
nevernˈɛvɐ
discoverdɪskˈʌvɐ
theðə
fraudfɹˈɔːd
.
Butbˈʌt
thenðˈɛn
,
asəz
Archbishopˌɑːtʃbˈɪʃəp
ofˈɒv
Titipu
,
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
mymˈaɪ
dutydjˈuːti
totˈuː
denouncedɪnˈaʊns
mymˈaɪ
dishonestydɪsˈɒnɪsti
andˈænd
giveɡˈɪv
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
intoˈɪntʊ
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
custodykˈʌstədi
asəz
firstfˈɜːst
Commissionerkəmˈɪʃənɐ
ofˈɒv
Policepəlˈiːs
.
KO
That's
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
awkwardˈɔːkwəd
.
POOH-BAH
I
don't
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
allˈɔːl
theseðˈiːz
distinguisheddɪstˈɪŋɡwɪʃt
peoplepˈiːpəl
couldn't
bebˈiː
squaredskwˈeəd
;
butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
rightɹˈaɪt
totˈuː
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
thatðˈæt
theyðˈeɪ
wouldn't
bebˈiː
sufficientlysəfˈɪʃəntli
degradeddɪɡɹˈeɪdɪd
inˈɪn
theirðˈeə
ownˈəʊn
estimationˌɛstɪmˈeɪʃən
unlessʌnlˈɛs
theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
insultedɪnsˈʌltɪd
withwˈɪð
a
veryvˈɛɹi
considerablekənsˈɪdəɹəbəl
bribebɹˈaɪb
.
KO
Theðə
mattermˈætɐ
shallʃˈæl
havehəv
mymˈaɪ
carefulkˈeəfəl
considerationkənsˌɪdəɹˈeɪʃən
.
Butbˈʌt
mymˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
andˈænd
herhˈɜː
sisterssˈɪstəz
approachɐpɹˈəʊtʃ
,
andˈænd
anyˈɛni
littlelˈɪtəl
complimentˈkɑmpləmənt
onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
partpˈɑːt
,
suchsˈʌtʃ
asəz
anˈɐn
abjectˈæbd͡ʒɛkt
grovelɡɹˈɒvəl
inˈɪn
a
characteristickˌæɹɪktəɹˈɪstɪk
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
attitudeˈætɪtjˌuːd
,
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
esteemedɛstˈiːmd
a
favourfˈeɪvɐ
.
POOH-BAH
Nonəʊ
moneymˈʌni
,
nonəʊ
grovelɡɹˈɒvəl
!
[Exeunt
POOH-BAH
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
.
Enter procession of Yum-Yum's schoolfellows, heralding Yum-Yum,
POOH-BAH
Peep-Bo
,
andˈænd
Pitti-Sing
.
CHORUS OF GIRLS
Comeskˈʌmz
a
traintɹˈeɪn
ofˈɒv
littlelˈɪtəl
ladieslˈeɪdɪz
Fromfɹˈɒm
scholasticskəlˈɑːstɪk
trammelstɹˈæməlz
freefɹˈiː
,
Eachˈiːtʃ
a
littlelˈɪtəl
bitbˈɪt
afraidɐfɹˈeɪd
isˈɪz
,
Wonderingwˈʌndəɹɪŋ
whatwˈɒt
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
cankˈæn
bebˈiː
!
Isˈɪz
itˈɪt
butbˈʌt
a
worldwˈɜːld
ofˈɒv
troubletɹˈʌbəl
—
Sadnesssˈædnəs
setsˈɛt
totˈuː
songsˈɒŋ
?
Isˈɪz
itsˈɪts
beautybjˈuːti
butbˈʌt
a
bubblebˈʌbəl
Boundbˈaʊnd
totˈuː
breakbɹˈeɪk
ereˈeə
longlˈɒŋ
?
Areə(ɹ)
itsˈɪts
palacespˈælɪsɪz
andˈænd
pleasuresplˈɛʒəz
Fantasiesfˈɑːntəsiz
thatðˈæt
fadefˈeɪd
?
Andˈænd
theðə
gloryɡlˈɔːɹi
ofˈɒv
itsˈɪts
treasurestɹˈɛʒəz
Shadowʃˈædəʊ
ofˈɒv
a
shadeʃˈeɪd
?
Schoolgirlsskˈuːlɡɜːlz
wewˈiː
,
eighteeneɪtˈiːn
andˈænd
underˈʌndɐ
,
Fromfɹˈɒm
scholasticskəlˈɑːstɪk
trammelstɹˈæməlz
freefɹˈiː
,
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
wonderwˈʌndɐ
—
howhˈaʊ
wewˈiː
wonderwˈʌndɐ
!—
Whatwˈɒt
onˈɒn
earthˈɜːθ
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
cankˈæn
bebˈiː
!
TRIO
YUM-YUM
,
PEEP-BO
,
andˈænd
PITTI-SING
,
withwˈɪð
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
GIRLSɡˈɜːlz
.
THE THREE
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
,
Pertpˈɜːt
asəz
a
school-girl
wellwˈɛl
cankˈæn
bebˈiː
,
Filledfˈɪld
totˈuː
theðə
brimbɹˈɪm
withwˈɪð
girlishɡˈɜːlɪʃ
gleeɡlˈiː
,
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
YUM-YUM
Everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
isˈɪz
a
sourcesˈɔːs
ofˈɒv
funfˈʌn
.
Chuckle
PEEP-BO
Nobody's
safesˈeɪf
,
forfˈɔː
wewˈiː
carekˈeə
forfˈɔː
nonenʌn
!
(
Chuckletʃˈʌkəl
)
PITTI-SING
Lifelˈaɪf
isˈɪz
a
jokedʒˈəʊk
that's
justdʒˈʌst
begunbɪɡˈʌn
!
(
Chuckletʃˈʌkəl
)
THE THREE
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
ALLˈɔːl
(
dancingdˈɑːnsɪŋ
).
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
whohˈuː
,
allˈɔːl
unwaryʌnwˈeəɹi
,
Comekˈʌm
fromfɹˈɒm
a
ladies'
seminarysˈɛmɪnəɹi
,
Freedfɹˈiːd
fromfɹˈɒm
itsˈɪts
geniusdʒˈiːnɪəs
tutelaryˈtjuːtɪləɹɪ
—
THEðə
THREEθɹˈiː
(
suddenlysˈʌdənli
demuredɪmjˈɔː
).
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
YUM-YUM
Onewˈɒn
littlelˈɪtəl
maidmˈeɪd
isˈɪz
a
bridebɹˈaɪd
,
Yum-Yum
—
PEEP-BO
Twotˈuː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
inˈɪn
attendanceɐtˈɛndəns
comekˈʌm
—
PITTI-SING
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
isˈɪz
theðə
totaltˈəʊtəl
sumsˈʌm
.
THE THREE
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
YUM-YUM
Fromfɹˈɒm
threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
taketˈeɪk
onewˈɒn
awayɐwˈeɪ
.
PEEP-BO
Twotˈuː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
remainɹɪmˈeɪn
,
andˈænd
theyðˈeɪ
—
PITTI-SING
Won't
havehəv
totˈuː
waitwˈeɪt
veryvˈɛɹi
longlˈɒŋ
,
theyðˈeɪ
saysˈeɪ
—
THE THREE
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
ALLˈɔːl
(
dancingdˈɑːnsɪŋ
).
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
whohˈuː
,
allˈɔːl
unwaryʌnwˈeəɹi
,
Comekˈʌm
fromfɹˈɒm
a
ladies'
seminarysˈɛmɪnəɹi
,
Freedfɹˈiːd
fromfɹˈɒm
itsˈɪts
geniusdʒˈiːnɪəs
tutelaryˈtjuːtɪləɹɪ
—
THEðə
THREEθɹˈiː
(
suddenlysˈʌdənli
demuredɪmjˈɔː
).
Threeθɹˈiː
littlelˈɪtəl
maidsmˈeɪdz
fromfɹˈɒm
schoolskˈuːl
!
Enter Ko-Ko and Pooh-Bah.
KO
Atˈæt
lastlˈɑːst
,
mymˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
!
(
Aboutɐbˈaʊt
totˈuː
embraceɛmbɹˈeɪs
herhˈɜː
)
YUM-YUM
You're
notnˈɒt
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
kisskˈɪs
memˈiː
beforebɪfˈɔː
allˈɔːl
theseðˈiːz
peoplepˈiːpəl
?
KO
Wellwˈɛl
,
thatðˈæt
waswˈɒz
theðə
ideaaɪdˈiə
.
YUM (aside to Peep-Bo).
KO
Itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
oddˈɒd
,
doesn't
itˈɪt
?
PEEP-BO
It's
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
peculiarpɪkjˈuːliə
.
PITTI-SING
Ohˈəʊ
,
I
expectɛkspˈɛkt
it's
allˈɔːl
rightɹˈaɪt
.
Mustmˈʌst
havehəv
a
beginningbɪɡˈɪnɪŋ
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
.
YUM-YUM
Wellwˈɛl
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
I
knownˈəʊ
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
theseðˈiːz
thingsθˈɪŋz
;
butbˈʌt
I've
nonəʊ
objectionɒbdʒˈɛkʃən
ifˈɪf
it's
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
.
KO
Ohˈəʊ
,
it's
quitekwaɪt
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
.
Ehˈeɪ
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Chamberlaintʃˈeɪmbəlˌɪn
?
Appealing to Pooh-Bah
POOH-BAH
I
havehəv
knownnˈəʊn
itˈɪt
donedˈʌn
.
Ko-Ko embraces her
YUM-YUM
Thankθˈæŋk
goodnessɡˈʊdnəs
that's
overˈəʊvɐ
!
(
Seessˈiːz
Nanki-Poo
,
andˈænd
rushesɹˈʌʃɪz
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
)
Whywˈaɪ
,
that's
nevernˈɛvɐ
youjˈuː
?
(
Theðə
threeθɹˈiː
Girlsɡˈɜːlz
rushɹˈʌʃ
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
andˈænd
shakeʃˈeɪk
hishˈɪz
handshˈændz
,
allˈɔːl
speakingspˈiːkɪŋ
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
I'm
sosˈəʊ
gladɡlˈæd
!
I
haven't
seensˈiːn
youjˈuː
forfˈɔː
everˈɛvɐ
sosˈəʊ
longlˈɒŋ
,
andˈænd
I'm
rightɹˈaɪt
atˈæt
theðə
toptˈɒp
ofˈɒv
theðə
schoolskˈuːl
,
andˈænd
I've
gotɡˈɒt
threeθɹˈiː
prizespɹˈaɪzɪz
,
andˈænd
I've
comekˈʌm
homehˈəʊm
forfˈɔː
goodɡˈʊd
,
andˈænd
I'm
notnˈɒt
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
backbˈæk
anyˈɛni
moremˈɔː
!
PEEP-BO
Andˈænd
havehəv
youjˈuː
gotɡˈɒt
anˈɐn
engagementɛnɡˈeɪdʒmənt
?—
Yum-Yum's
gotɡˈɒt
onewˈɒn
,
butbˈʌt
sheʃˈiː
doesn't
likelˈaɪk
itˈɪt
,
andˈænd
she'd
everˈɛvɐ
sosˈəʊ
muchmˈʌtʃ
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
youjˈuː
!
I've
comekˈʌm
homehˈəʊm
forfˈɔː
goodɡˈʊd
,
andˈænd
I'm
notnˈɒt
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
backbˈæk
anyˈɛni
moremˈɔː
!
PITTI-SING
Nownˈaʊ
telltˈɛl
usˈʌs
allˈɔːl
theðə
newsnjˈuːz
,
becausebɪkˈʌz
youjˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
everywhereˈɛvɹɪwˌeə
,
andˈænd
we've
beenbˈiːn
atˈæt
schoolskˈuːl
,
butbˈʌt
,
thankθˈæŋk
goodnessɡˈʊdnəs
,
that's
allˈɔːl
overˈəʊvɐ
nownˈaʊ
,
andˈænd
we've
comekˈʌm
homehˈəʊm
forfˈɔː
goodɡˈʊd
,
andˈænd
we're
notnˈɒt
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
backbˈæk
anyˈɛni
moremˈɔː
!
These three speeches are spoken together in one breath
KO
I
begbˈɛɡ
yourjˈɔː
pardonpˈɑːdən
.
Willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
presentˈpɹɛzənt
memˈiː
?
YUM-YUM
Ohˈəʊ
,
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
theðə
musicianmjuːzˈɪʃən
whohˈuː
usedjuːzd
—
PEEP-BO
Ohˈəʊ
,
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
theðə
gentleman-who
usedjuːzd
—
PITTI-SING
Ohˈəʊ
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
onlyˈəʊnli
Nanki-Poo
whohˈuː
usedjuːzd
—
KO
Onewˈɒn
atˈæt
a
timetˈaɪm
,
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
pleaseplˈiːz
.
YUM-YUM
Ohˈəʊ
,
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
pleaseplˈiːz
he's
theðə
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
whohˈuː
usedjuːzd
totˈuː
playplˈeɪ
sosˈəʊ
beautifullybjˈuːtɪfəli
onˈɒn
theðə
—
onˈɒn
theðə
—
PITTI-SING
Onˈɒn
theðə
Marineməɹˈiːn
Paradepəɹˈeɪd
.
YUM-YUM
Yesjˈɛs
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
thatðˈæt
waswˈɒz
theðə
namenˈeɪm
ofˈɒv
theðə
instrumentˈɪnstɹəmənt
.
NANKI-POO
Sirsˈɜː
,
I
havehəv
theðə
misfortunemɪsfˈɔːtʃuːn
totˈuː
lovelˈʌv
yourjˈɔː
wardwˈɔːd
,
Yum-Yum
—
ohˈəʊ
,
I
knownˈəʊ
I
deservedɪzˈɜːv
yourjˈɔː
angerˈæŋɡɐ
!
KO
Angerˈæŋɡɐ
!
notnˈɒt
a
bitbˈɪt
,
mymˈaɪ
boybˈɔɪ
.
Whywˈaɪ
,
I
lovelˈʌv
herhˈɜː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
.
Charmingtʃˈɑːmɪŋ
littlelˈɪtəl
girlɡˈɜːl
,
isn't
sheʃˈiː
?
Prettypɹˈɪti
eyesˈaɪz
,
nicenaɪs
hairhˈeə
.
Takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
littlelˈɪtəl
thingθˈɪŋ
,
altogetherˌɔːltəɡˈɛðɐ
.
Veryvˈɛɹi
gladɡlˈæd
totˈuː
hearhˈiə
mymˈaɪ
opinionəpˈɪniən
backedbˈækt
bybˈaɪ
a
competentkˈɒmpɪtənt
authorityɐθˈɒɹɪtˌi
.
Thankθˈæŋk
youjˈuː
veryvˈɛɹi
muchmˈʌtʃ
.
Good-byeɡʊdˈbaɪ
.
(
Totˈuː
Pish-Tush
)
Taketˈeɪk
himhˈɪm
awayɐwˈeɪ
.
Pish-Tush removes him
KO
PITTI
(
whohˈuː
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
examiningɛɡzˈæmɪnɪŋ
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
).
I
begbˈɛɡ
yourjˈɔː
pardonpˈɑːdən
,
butbˈʌt
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
thisðˈɪs
?
Customerkˈʌstəmɐ
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
trytɹˈaɪ
onˈɒn
?
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
a
Tremendoustɹəmˈɛndəs
Swellswˈɛl
.
PITTI-SING
Ohˈəʊ
,
it's
aliveɐlˈaɪv
.
She starts back in alarm
POOH-BAH
Goɡˈəʊ
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
littlelˈɪtəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
.
Can't
talktˈɔːk
totˈuː
littlelˈɪtəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
likelˈaɪk
youjˈuː
.
Goɡˈəʊ
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
there's
dearsdˈiəz
.
KO
Allowɐlˈaʊ
memˈiː
totˈuː
presentˈpɹɛzənt
youjˈuː
,
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
.
Theseðˈiːz
areə(ɹ)
mymˈaɪ
threeθɹˈiː
wardswˈɔːdz
.
Theðə
onewˈɒn
inˈɪn
theðə
middlemˈɪdəl
isˈɪz
mymˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
electɪlˈɛkt
.
POOH-BAH
Whatwˈɒt
dodə
youjˈuː
wantwˈɒnt
memˈiː
totˈuː
dodə
totˈuː
themðˈɛm
?
Mindmˈaɪnd
,
I
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
kisskˈɪs
themðˈɛm
.
KO
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
,
youjˈuː
shan't
kisskˈɪs
themðˈɛm
;
a
littlelˈɪtəl
bowbəʊ
—
a
meremˈiə
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
—
youjˈuː
needn't
meanmˈiːn
itˈɪt
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
.
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
goesɡˈəʊz
againstɐɡˈɛnst
theðə
grainɡɹˈeɪn
.
Theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
notnˈɒt
youngjˈʌŋ
ladieslˈeɪdɪz
,
theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
youngjˈʌŋ
personspˈɜːsənz
.
KO
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
,
makemˈeɪk
anˈɐn
effortˈɛfət
,
there's
a
goodɡˈʊd
noblemannˈəʊbəlmən
.
(aside to Ko-Ko).
POOH-BAH
Wellwˈɛl
,
I
shan't
meanmˈiːn
itˈɪt
.
(
withwˈɪð
a
greatɡɹˈeɪt
effortˈɛfət
)
Howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
,
littlelˈɪtəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
,
howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
?
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
mymˈaɪ
protoplasmal
ancestorˈænsɛstɐ
!
KO
That's
veryvˈɛɹi
goodɡˈʊd
.
(
Girlsɡˈɜːlz
indulgeɪndˈʌldʒ
inˈɪn
suppressedsəpɹˈɛst
laughterlˈɑːftɐ
)
I see nothing to laugh at.
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
veryvˈɛɹi
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
totˈuː
memˈiː
totˈuː
havehəv
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
"
Howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
,
littlelˈɪtəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
,
howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
?"
totˈuː
youngjˈʌŋ
personspˈɜːsənz
.
I'm
notnˈɒt
inˈɪn
theðə
habithˈæbɪt
ofˈɒv
sayingsˈeɪɪŋ
"
Howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
,
littlelˈɪtəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
,
howhˈaʊ
dedˈɐ
dodə
?"
totˈuː
anybodyˈɛnɪbˌɒdi
underˈʌndɐ
theðə
rankɹˈæŋk
ofˈɒv
a
Stockbrokerstˈɒkbɹəʊkɐ
.
(aside to girls).
Don't laugh at him, he can't help
KO
itˈɪt
—
he's
underˈʌndɐ
treatmenttɹˈiːtmənt
forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
.
(Aside to Pooh-Bah) Never mind
KO
themðˈɛm
,
theyðˈeɪ
don't
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
theðə
delicacydˈɛlɪkəsi
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
positionpəzˈɪʃən
.
POOH-BAH
Wewˈiː
knownˈəʊ
howhˈaʊ
delicatedˈɛlɪkət
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
,
don't
wewˈiː
?
KO
I
shouldʃˈʊd
thinkθˈɪŋk
wewˈiː
diddˈɪd
!
Howhˈaʊ
a
noblemannˈəʊbəlmən
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
importanceɪmpˈɔːtəns
cankˈæn
dodə
itˈɪt
atˈæt
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
a
thingθˈɪŋ
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
cankˈæn
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
shallʃˈæl
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
.
[
Ko-Ko
retiresɹɪtˈaɪəz
andˈænd
goesɡˈəʊz
offˈɒf
.
CHORUS
YUM-YUM
,
PEEP-BO
,
PITTI-SING
,
andˈænd
POOH-BAHˈpuːbɑː
.
YUM, PEEP
Sosˈəʊ
pleaseplˈiːz
youjˈuː
,
Sirsˈɜː
,
wewˈiː
muchmˈʌtʃ
regretɹɪɡɹˈɛt
andˈænd
PITTI
.
Ifˈɪf
wewˈiː
havehəv
failedfˈeɪld
inˈɪn
etiquetteˈɛtɪkˌɛt
Towardstʊwˈɔːdz
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
rankɹˈæŋk
sosˈəʊ
highhˈaɪ
—
Wewˈiː
shallʃˈæl
knownˈəʊ
betterbˈɛtɐ
bybˈaɪ
andˈænd
bybˈaɪ
.
YUM-YUM
Butbˈʌt
youthjˈuːθ
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
mustmˈʌst
havehəv
itsˈɪts
flingflˈɪŋ
,
Sosˈəʊ
pardonpˈɑːdən
usˈʌs
,
PITTI-SING
Andˈænd
don't
,
inˈɪn
girlhood's
happyhˈæpi
springspɹˈɪŋ
,
Bebˈiː
hardhˈɑːd
onˈɒn
usˈʌs
,
Ifˈɪf
we're
inclinedɪnklˈaɪnd
totˈuː
dancedˈɑːns
andˈænd
singsˈɪŋ
.
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Dancing
CHORUS OF GIRLS
Butbˈʌt
youthjˈuːθ
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
POOH-BAH
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
recollectɹɛkəˈlɛkt
Youjˈuː
cannotˈkænɒt
showʃˈəʊ
tootˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
respectɹɪspˈɛkt
Towardstʊwˈɔːdz
theðə
highlyhˈaɪli
titledtˈaɪtəld
fewfjˈuː
;
Butbˈʌt
nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
doesdəz
,
andˈænd
whywˈaɪ
shouldʃˈʊd
youjˈuː
?
Thatðˈæt
youthjˈuːθ
atˈæt
usˈʌs
shouldʃˈʊd
havehəv
itsˈɪts
flingflˈɪŋ
,
Isˈɪz
hardhˈɑːd
onˈɒn
usˈʌs
,
Isˈɪz
hardhˈɑːd
onˈɒn
usˈʌs
;
Totˈuː
ourˈaʊə
prerogativepɹɪɹˈɒɡətˌɪv
wewˈiː
clingklˈɪŋ
—
Sosˈəʊ
pardonpˈɑːdən
usˈʌs
,
Ifˈɪf
wewˈiː
declinedɪklˈaɪn
totˈuː
dancedˈɑːns
andˈænd
singsˈɪŋ
.
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Dancing
CHORUS OF GIRLS
Butbˈʌt
youthjˈuːθ
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
mustmˈʌst
havehəv
itsˈɪts
flingflˈɪŋ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Exeunt all but
Enter Nanki-Poo.
NANKI-POO
Yum-Yum
,
atˈæt
lastlˈɑːst
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
aloneɐlˈəʊn
!
I
havehəv
soughtsˈɔːt
youjˈuː
nightnˈaɪt
andˈænd
daydˈeɪ
forfˈɔː
threeθɹˈiː
weekswˈiːks
,
inˈɪn
theðə
beliefbɪlˈiːf
thatðˈæt
yourjˈɔː
guardianɡˈɑːdiən
waswˈɒz
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
,
andˈænd
I
findfˈaɪnd
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
aboutɐbˈaʊt
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
thisðˈɪs
afternoonˌɑːf.təˈnuːn
!
YUM-YUM
Alasɐlˈæs
,
yesjˈɛs
!
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
youjˈuː
dodə
notnˈɒt
lovelˈʌv
himhˈɪm
?
YUM-YUM
Alasɐlˈæs
,
nonəʊ
!
NANKI-POO
Modifiedmˈɒdɪfˌaɪd
raptureɹˈæptʃɐ
!
Butbˈʌt
whywˈaɪ
dodə
youjˈuː
notnˈɒt
refuseˈɹɛfjuːs
himhˈɪm
?
YUM-YUM
Whatwˈɒt
goodɡˈʊd
wouldwˈʊd
thatðˈæt
dodə
?
He's
mymˈaɪ
guardianɡˈɑːdiən
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
wouldn't
letlˈɛt
memˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
!
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
I
wouldwˈʊd
waitwˈeɪt
untilʌntˈɪl
youjˈuː
werewˈɜː
ofˈɒv
ageˈeɪdʒ
!
YUM-YUM
Youjˈuː
forgetfəɡˈɛt
thatðˈæt
inˈɪn
Japandʒəpˈæn
girlsɡˈɜːlz
dodə
notnˈɒt
arriveɐɹˈaɪv
atˈæt
yearsjˈiəz
ofˈɒv
discretiondɪskɹˈɛʃən
untilʌntˈɪl
theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
fiftyfˈɪfti
.
NANKI-POO
Truetɹˈuː
;
fromfɹˈɒm
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
totˈuː
forty-nine
areə(ɹ)
consideredkənsˈɪdəd
yearsjˈiəz
ofˈɒv
indiscretionˌɪndɪskɹˈɛʃən
.
YUM-YUM
Besidesbɪsˈaɪdz
—
a
wanderingwˈɒndəɹɪŋ
minstrelmˈɪnstɹəl
,
whohˈuː
playsplˈeɪz
a
windwɪnd
instrumentˈɪnstɹəmənt
outsideˈaʊt.saɪd
tea-houses
,
isˈɪz
hardlyhˈɑːdli
a
fittingfˈɪtɪŋ
husbandhˈʌsbənd
forfˈɔː
theðə
wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
a
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
——
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Shallʃˈæl
I
telltˈɛl
herhˈɜː
?
Yesjˈɛs
!
Sheʃˈiː
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
betraybɪtɹˈeɪ
memˈiː
!
(
Aloudɐlˈaʊd
)
Whatwˈɒt
ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
shouldʃˈʊd
provepɹˈuːv
thatðˈæt
,
afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
I
aməm
nonəʊ
musicianmjuːzˈɪʃən
?
YUM-YUM
Thereðˈeə
!
I
waswˈɒz
certainsˈɜːtən
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
,
directlydaɪɹˈɛktli
I
heardhˈɜːd
youjˈuː
playplˈeɪ
!
NANKI-POO
Whatwˈɒt
ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
shouldʃˈʊd
provepɹˈuːv
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
nonəʊ
otherˈʌðɐ
thanðˈɐn
theðə
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
Majestymˈædʒəsti
theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
?
YUM-YUM
Theðə
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
!
Butbˈʌt
whywˈaɪ
isˈɪz
yourjˈɔː
Highnesshˈaɪnəs
disguiseddɪsɡˈaɪzd
?
Andˈænd
whatwˈɒt
hashˈæz
yourjˈɔː
Highnesshˈaɪnəs
donedˈʌn
?
Andˈænd
willwˈɪl
yourjˈɔː
Highnesshˈaɪnəs
promisepɹˈɒmɪs
nevernˈɛvɐ
totˈuː
dodə
itˈɪt
againɐɡˈɛn
?
NANKI-POO
Somesˈʌm
yearsjˈiəz
agoɐɡˈəʊ
I
hadhˈæd
theðə
misfortunemɪsfˈɔːtʃuːn
totˈuː
captivatekˈæptɪvˌeɪt
Katisha
,
anˈɐn
elderlyˈɛldəli
ladylˈeɪdi
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
father's
Courtkˈɔːt
.
Sheʃˈiː
misconstruedmɪskənstɹˈuːd
mymˈaɪ
customarykˈʌstəməɹi
affabilityˌæfəbˈɪlɪti
intoˈɪntʊ
expressionsɛkspɹˈɛʃənz
ofˈɒv
affectionɐfˈɛkʃən
,
andˈænd
claimedklˈeɪmd
memˈiː
inˈɪn
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
,
underˈʌndɐ
mymˈaɪ
father's
lawlˈɔː
.
Mymˈaɪ
fatherfˈɑːðɐ
,
theðə
Luciusˈluːsɪəs
Junius
Brutusˈbɹutəs
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
raceɹˈeɪs
,
orderedˈɔːdəd
memˈiː
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
herhˈɜː
withinwɪðˈɪn
a
weekwˈiːk
,
orˈɔː
perishpˈɛɹɪʃ
ignominiouslyˌɪɡnəmˈɪnɪəsli
onˈɒn
theðə
scaffoldskˈæfəʊld
.
Thatðˈæt
nightnˈaɪt
I
fledflˈɛd
hishˈɪz
Courtkˈɔːt
,
andˈænd
,
assumingɐsˈuːmɪŋ
theðə
disguisedɪsɡˈaɪz
ofˈɒv
a
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Trombonetɹɒmbˈəʊn
,
I
joineddʒˈɔɪnd
theðə
bandbˈænd
inˈɪn
whichwˈɪtʃ
youjˈuː
foundfˈaʊnd
memˈiː
whenwˈɛn
I
hadhˈæd
theðə
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
ofˈɒv
seeingsˈiːɪŋ
youjˈuː
!
(
Approachingɐpɹˈəʊtʃɪŋ
herhˈɜː
)
YUM-YUM
(
retreatingɹɪtɹˈiːtɪŋ
).
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
pleaseplˈiːz
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
yourjˈɔː
Highnesshˈaɪnəs
hadhˈæd
betterbˈɛtɐ
notnˈɒt
comekˈʌm
tootˈuː
nearnˈiə
.
Theðə
lawslˈɔːz
againstɐɡˈɛnst
flirtingflˈɜːtɪŋ
areə(ɹ)
excessivelyɛksˈɛsɪvli
severesɪvˈiə
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
quitekwaɪt
aloneɐlˈəʊn
,
andˈænd
nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
cankˈæn
seesˈiː
usˈʌs
.
YUM-YUM
Stillstˈɪl
,
thatðˈæt
don't
makemˈeɪk
itˈɪt
rightɹˈaɪt
.
Totˈuː
flirtflˈɜːt
isˈɪz
capitalkˈæpɪtəl
.
NANKI-POO
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
capitalkˈæpɪtəl
!
YUM-YUM
Andˈænd
wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
obeyəʊbˈeɪ
theðə
lawlˈɔː
.
NANKI-POO
Deucedjˈuːs
taketˈeɪk
theðə
lawlˈɔː
!
YUM-YUM
I
wishwˈɪʃ
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
,
butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
won't
!
NANKI-POO
Ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
werewˈɜː
notnˈɒt
forfˈɔː
thatðˈæt
,
howhˈaʊ
happyhˈæpi
wewˈiː
mightmˈaɪt
bebˈiː
!
YUM-YUM
Happyhˈæpi
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
!
NANKI-POO
Ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
werewˈɜː
notnˈɒt
forfˈɔː
theðə
lawlˈɔː
,
wewˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
nownˈaʊ
bebˈiː
sittingsˈɪtɪŋ
sidesˈaɪd
bybˈaɪ
sidesˈaɪd
,
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
.
Sits by her
YUM-YUM
Insteadɪnstˈɛd
ofˈɒv
beingbˈiːɪŋ
obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
totˈuː
sitsˈɪt
halfhˈɑːf
a
milemˈaɪl
offˈɒf
,
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
.
Crosses and sits at other side of stage
NANKI-POO
Wewˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
gazingɡˈeɪzɪŋ
intoˈɪntʊ
eachˈiːtʃ
other's
eyesˈaɪz
,
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
.
Gazing at her sentimentally
Breathing sighs of unutterable love—like that.
Sighing and gazing lovingly at him
NANKI-POO
Withwˈɪð
ourˈaʊə
armsˈɑːmz
roundɹˈaʊnd
eachˈiːtʃ
other's
waistswˈeɪsts
,
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
.
Embracing her
YUM-YUM
Yesjˈɛs
,
ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
wasn't
forfˈɔː
theðə
lawlˈɔː
.
NANKI-POO
Ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
wasn't
forfˈɔː
theðə
lawlˈɔː
.
YUM-YUM
Asəz
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
wewˈiː
couldn't
dodə
anythingˈɛnɪθˌɪŋ
ofˈɒv
theðə
kindkˈaɪnd
.
NANKI-POO
Notnˈɒt
forfˈɔː
worldswˈɜːldz
!
YUM-YUM
Beingbˈiːɪŋ
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
Ko-Ko
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
!
NANKI-POO
Beingbˈiːɪŋ
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
Ko-Ko
!
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
YUM-YUM
andˈænd
NANKI-POO
.
Werewˈɜː
youjˈuː
notnˈɒt
totˈuː
Ko-Ko
plightedplaɪt
,
I
wouldwˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
inˈɪn
tendertˈɛndɐ
tonetˈəʊn
,
"
Lovedlˈʌvd
onewˈɒn
,
letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
bebˈiː
unitedjuːnˈaɪtɪd
—
Letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
bebˈiː
eachˈiːtʃ
other's
ownˈəʊn
!"
I
wouldwˈʊd
mergemˈɜːdʒ
allˈɔːl
rankɹˈæŋk
andˈænd
stationstˈeɪʃən
,
Worldlywˈɜːldli
sneerssnˈiəz
areə(ɹ)
noughtnˈɔːt
totˈuː
usˈʌs
,
Andˈænd
,
totˈuː
markmˈɑːk
mymˈaɪ
admirationˌædməɹˈeɪʃən
,
I would kiss you fondly thus— (Kisses her)
BOTH
I
/
Heˈhiː
wouldwˈʊd
kisskˈɪs
youjˈuː
/
memˈiː
fondlyfˈɒndli
thusðˈʌs
—
(
Kisskˈɪs
)
YUM-YUM
Butbˈʌt
asəz
I'm
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
Ko-Ko
,
To embrace you thus, con fuoco,
YUM-YUM
Wouldwˈʊd
distinctlydɪstˈɪŋktli
bebˈiː
nonəʊ
giuoco
,
Andˈænd
forfˈɔː
yamjˈæm
I
shouldʃˈʊd
getɡˈɛt
toko
—
BOTH
Toko
,
toko
,
toko
,
toko
!
NANKI-POO
Sosˈəʊ
,
Inˈɪn
spitespˈaɪt
ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
temptationtɛmptˈeɪʃən
,
Suchsˈʌtʃ
a
themeθˈiːm
I'll
notnˈɒt
discussdɪskˈʌs
,
Andˈænd
onˈɒn
nonəʊ
considerationkənsˌɪdəɹˈeɪʃən
Will I kiss you fondly thus— (Kissing her)
NANKI-POO
Letlˈɛt
memˈiː
makemˈeɪk
itˈɪt
clearklˈiə
totˈuː
youjˈuː
,
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
whatwˈɒt
I'll
nevernˈɛvɐ
dodə
!
This, oh, this, oh, this, oh, this,—(Kissing
NANKI-POO
herhˈɜː
)
TOGETHER
Thisðˈɪs
,
ohˈəʊ
,
thisðˈɪs
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Exeunt in opposite
TOGETHER
directionsdaɪɹˈɛkʃənz
.
Enter Ko-Ko.
KO
(
lookinglˈʊkɪŋ
afterˈɑːftɐ
Yum-Yum
).
Thereðˈeə
sheʃˈiː
goesɡˈəʊz
!
Totˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
howhˈaʊ
entirelyɛntˈaɪəli
mymˈaɪ
futurefjˈuːtʃɐ
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
isˈɪz
wrappedɹˈæpt
upˈʌp
inˈɪn
thatðˈæt
littlelˈɪtəl
parcelpˈɑːsəl
!
Reallyɹˈiəli
,
itˈɪt
hardlyhˈɑːdli
seemssˈiːmz
worthwˈɜːθ
whilewˈaɪl
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
matrimonymˈætɹɪməni
!—
(
Enterˈɛntɐ
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
andˈænd
Pish-Tush
)
Nownˈaʊ
thenðˈɛn
,
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
itˈɪt
?
Can't
youjˈuː
seesˈiː
I'm
soliloquizing
?
Youjˈuː
havehəv
interruptedˌɪntəɹˈʌptɪd
anˈɐn
apostropheɐpˈɒstɹəfi
,
sirsˈɜː
!
PISH-TUSH
I
aməm
theðə
bearerbˈeəɹɐ
ofˈɒv
a
letterlˈɛtɐ
fromfɹˈɒm
hishˈɪz
Majestymˈædʒəsti
theðə
KO
(
takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
itˈɪt
fromfɹˈɒm
himhˈɪm
reverentially
).
A
letterlˈɛtɐ
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
!
Whatwˈɒt
inˈɪn
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
cankˈæn
heˈhiː
havehəv
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
totˈuː
memˈiː
?
(
Readsɹˈiːdz
letterlˈɛtɐ
)
Ahˈɑː
,
herehˈiə
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
atˈæt
lastlˈɑːst
!
I
thoughtθˈɔːt
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
comekˈʌm
soonersˈuːnɐ
orˈɔː
laterlˈeɪtɐ
!
Theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
isˈɪz
struckstɹˈʌk
bybˈaɪ
theðə
factfˈækt
thatðˈæt
nonəʊ
executionsˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənz
havehəv
takentˈeɪkən
placeplˈeɪs
inˈɪn
Titipu
forfˈɔː
a
yearjˈiə
,
andˈænd
decreesdɪkɹˈiːz
thatðˈæt
unlessʌnlˈɛs
somebodysˈʌmbɒdi
isˈɪz
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
withinwɪðˈɪn
onewˈɒn
monthmˈʌnθ
theðə
postpˈəʊst
ofˈɒv
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
abolishedɐbˈɒlɪʃt
,
andˈænd
theðə
citysˈɪti
reducedɹɪdjˈuːst
totˈuː
theðə
rankɹˈæŋk
ofˈɒv
a
villagevˈɪlɪdʒ
!
PISH-TUSH
Butbˈʌt
thatðˈæt
willwˈɪl
involveɪnvˈɒlv
usˈʌs
allˈɔːl
inˈɪn
irretrievableɪɹɪtɹˈiːvəbəl
ruinɹˈuːɪn
!
KO
Yesjˈɛs
.
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
nonəʊ
helphˈɛlp
forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
,
I
shallʃˈæl
havehəv
totˈuː
executeˈɛksɪkjˌuːt
somebodysˈʌmbɒdi
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
Theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
questionkwˈɛstʃən
isˈɪz
,
whohˈuː
shallʃˈæl
itˈɪt
bebˈiː
?
POOH-BAH
Wellwˈɛl
,
itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
unkindʌnkˈaɪnd
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
sosˈəʊ
,
butbˈʌt
asəz
you're
alreadyɔːlɹˈɛdi
underˈʌndɐ
sentencesˈɛntəns
ofˈɒv
deathdˈɛθ
forfˈɔː
flirtingflˈɜːtɪŋ
,
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
seemssˈiːmz
totˈuː
point to you.
KO
Totˈuː
memˈiː
?
Whatwˈɒt
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
talkingtˈɔːkɪŋ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
?
I
can't
executeˈɛksɪkjˌuːt
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
.
POOH-BAH
Whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
?
KO
Whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
?
Becausebɪkˈʌz
,
inˈɪn
theðə
firstfˈɜːst
placeplˈeɪs
,
selfsˈɛlf
decapitationdɪkˌæpɪtˈeɪʃən
isˈɪz
anˈɐn
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
difficultdˈɪfɪkəlt
,
notnˈɒt
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
dangerousdˈeɪndʒəɹəs
,
thingθˈɪŋ
totˈuː
attemptɐtˈɛmpt
;
andˈænd
,
inˈɪn
theðə
secondˈsɛk.ənd
,
it's
suicidesˈuːɪsˌaɪd
,
andˈænd
suicidesˈuːɪsˌaɪd
isˈɪz
a
capitalkˈæpɪtəl
offenceəˈfɛns
.
POOH-BAH
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
sosˈəʊ
,
nonəʊ
doubtdˈaʊt
.
We might reserve that point.
POOH-BAH
Truetɹˈuː
,
itˈɪt
couldkˈʊd
bebˈiː
arguedˈɑːɡjuːd
sixsˈɪks
monthsmˈʌnθs
hencehˈɛns
,
beforebɪfˈɔː
theðə
fullfˈʊl
Courtkˈɔːt
.
KO
Besidesbɪsˈaɪdz
,
I
don't
seesˈiː
howhˈaʊ
a
manmˈæn
cankˈæn
cutkˈʌt
offˈɒf
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
headhˈɛd
.
POOH-BAH
A
manmˈæn
mightmˈaɪt
trytɹˈaɪ
.
PISH-TUSH
Evenˈiːvən
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
onlyˈəʊnli
succeededsəksˈiːdɪd
inˈɪn
cuttingkˈʌtɪŋ
itˈɪt
halfhˈɑːf
offˈɒf
,
thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
.
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
takentˈeɪkən
asəz
anˈɐn
earnestˈɜːnəst
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
desiredɪzˈaɪə
totˈuː
complykəmplˈaɪ
withwˈɪð
theðə
Imperialɪmpˈiəɹɪəl
willwˈɪl
.
KO
Nonəʊ
.
Pardonpˈɑːdən
memˈiː
,
butbˈʌt
thereðˈeə
I
aməm
adamantˈædəmənt
.
Asəz
officialəfˈɪʃəl
Headsmanhˈɛdzmən
,
mymˈaɪ
reputationɹˌɛpjuːtˈeɪʃən
isˈɪz
atˈæt
stakestˈeɪk
,
andˈænd
I
can't
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
embarkɛmbˈɑːk
onˈɒn
a
professionalpɹəfˈɛʃənəl
operationˌɒpəɹˈeɪʃən
unlessʌnlˈɛs
I
seesˈiː
mymˈaɪ
waywˈeɪ
totˈuː
a
successfulsəksˈɛsfəl
resultɹɪzˈʌlt
.
POOH-BAH
Thisðˈɪs
professionalpɹəfˈɛʃənəl
conscientiousnesskˌɒnsɪˈɛnʃəsnəs
isˈɪz
highlyhˈaɪli
creditablekɹˈɛdɪtəbəl
totˈuː
youjˈuː
,
butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
placesplˈeɪsɪz
usˈʌs
inˈɪn
a
veryvˈɛɹi
awkwardˈɔːkwəd
positionpəzˈɪʃən
.
KO
Mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
sirsˈɜː
,
theðə
awkwardnessˈɔːkwədnəs
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
positionpəzˈɪʃən
isˈɪz
graceɡɹˈeɪs
itselfɪtsˈɛlf
comparedkəmpˈeəd
withwˈɪð
thatðˈæt
ofˈɒv
a
manmˈæn
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
inˈɪn
theðə
actˈækt
ofˈɒv
cuttingkˈʌtɪŋ
offˈɒf
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
headhˈɛd
.
PISH-TUSH
I
aməm
afraidɐfɹˈeɪd
thatðˈæt
,
unlessʌnlˈɛs
youjˈuː
cankˈæn
obtainɒbtˈeɪn
a
substitutesˈʌbstɪtjˌuːt
KO
A
substitutesˈʌbstɪtjˌuːt
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
certainlysˈɜːtənli
—
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
easierˈiːzɪɐ
.
(
Totˈuː
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
)
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
,
I
appointɐpˈɔɪnt
youjˈuː
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Substitutesˈʌbstɪtjˌuːt
.
POOH-BAH
I
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
delighteddɪlˈaɪtɪd
.
Suchsˈʌtʃ
anˈɐn
appointmentɐpˈɔɪntmənt
wouldwˈʊd
realizeˈɹɪə.laɪz
mymˈaɪ
fondestfˈɒndəst
dreamsdɹˈiːmz
.
Butbˈʌt
nonəʊ
,
atˈæt
anyˈɛni
sacrificesˈækɹɪfˌaɪs
,
I
mustmˈʌst
setsˈɛt
boundsbˈaʊndz
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
insatiableɪnsˈeɪʃɪəbəl
ambitionæmbˈɪʃən
!
TRIO
Ko-Ko
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
Pish-Tush
Mymˈaɪ
brainbɹˈeɪn
itˈɪt
teamstˈiːmz
I
aməm
sosˈəʊ
proudpɹˈaʊd
,
I
heardhˈɜːd
onewˈɒn
daydˈeɪ
Withwˈɪð
endlessˈɛndləs
schemesskˈiːmz
Ifˈɪf
I
allowedɐlˈaʊd
A
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
saysˈeɪ
Bothbˈəʊθ
goodɡˈʊd
andˈænd
newnjˈuː
Mymˈaɪ
familyfˈæmɪli
pridepɹˈaɪd
Thatðˈæt
criminalskɹˈɪmɪnəlz
whohˈuː
Forfˈɔː
Titipu
;
Totˈuː
bebˈiː
mymˈaɪ
guideɡˈaɪd
,
Areə(ɹ)
cutkˈʌt
inˈɪn
twotˈuː
Butbˈʌt
ifˈɪf
I
flitflˈɪt
,
I'd
volunteervˌɒləntˈiə
Cankˈæn
hardlyhˈɑːdli
feelfˈiːl
Theðə
benefitbˈɛnɪfˌɪt
Totˈuː
quitkwˈɪt
thisðˈɪs
spheresfˈiə
Theðə
fatalfˈeɪtəl
steelstˈiːl
,
Thatðˈæt
I'd
diffusedɪˈfjuːz
Insteadɪnstˈɛd
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
Andˈænd
sosˈəʊ
areə(ɹ)
slainslˈeɪn
Theðə
towntˈaʊn
wouldwˈʊd
loselˈuːz
!
Inˈɪn
a
minuteˈmɪnɪt
orˈɔː
twotˈuː
,
Withoutwɪðˈaʊt
muchmˈʌtʃ
painpˈeɪn
.
Nownˈaʊ
everyˈɛvɹi
manmˈæn
Butbˈʌt
familyfˈæmɪli
pridepɹˈaɪd
Ifˈɪf
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
truetɹˈuː
,
Totˈuː
aidˈeɪd
hishˈɪz
clanklˈæn
Mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
denieddɪnˈaɪd
,
It's
jollydʒˈɒli
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
;
Should plot and plan And set aside, Your courage
TRIO
screwskɹˈuː
Asəz
bestbˈɛst
heˈhiː
cankˈæn
,
Andˈænd
mortifiedmˈɔːtɪfˌaɪd
.
Totˈuː
bidbˈɪd
usˈʌs
adieuɐdjˈuː
,
Andˈænd
sosˈəʊ
,
Andˈænd
sosˈəʊ
,
Andˈænd
goɡˈəʊ
Althoughɒlðˈəʊ
Althoughɒlðˈəʊ
Andˈænd
showʃˈəʊ
I'm
readyɹˈɛdi
totˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
,
I
wishwˈɪʃ
totˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
,
Bothbˈəʊθ
friendfɹˈɛnd
andˈænd
foefˈəʊ
Yetjˈɛt
recollectɹɛkəˈlɛkt
Andˈænd
greatlyɡɹˈeɪtli
pinepˈaɪn
Howhˈaʊ
muchmˈʌtʃ
youjˈuː
daredˈeə
.
'Twere
disrespectdˌɪsɹɪspˈɛkt
Totˈuː
brightlybɹˈaɪtli
shineʃˈaɪn
,
I'm
quitekwaɪt
awareɐwˈeə
Did I neglect And take the line It's your
TRIO
affairɐfˈeə
,
Totˈuː
thusðˈʌs
effectɪfˈɛkt
Ofˈɒv
a
herohˈiəɹəʊ
finefaɪn
,
Yetjˈɛt
I
declaredɪklˈeə
Thisðˈɪs
aimˈeɪm
directdaɪɹˈɛkt
,
Withwˈɪð
griefɡɹˈiːf
condignkəndˈaɪn
I'd
taketˈeɪk
yourjˈɔː
shareʃˈeə
,
Sosˈəʊ
I
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
—
I
mustmˈʌst
declinedɪklˈaɪn
—
Butbˈʌt
I
don't
muchmˈʌtʃ
carekˈeə
—
Sosˈəʊ
I
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
—
I
mustmˈʌst
declinedɪklˈaɪn
—
I
don't
muchmˈʌtʃ
carekˈeə
—
Sosˈəʊ
I
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
—
I
mustmˈʌst
declinedɪklˈaɪn
—
I
don't
muchmˈʌtʃ
carekˈeə
—
ALL
Totˈuː
sitsˈɪt
inˈɪn
solemnsˈɒləm
silencesˈaɪləns
inˈɪn
a
dulldˈʌl
,
darkdˈɑːk
dockdˈɒk
,
Inˈɪn
a
pestilentialpˌɛstɪlˈɛnʃəl
prisonpɹˈɪzən
,
withwˈɪð
a
life-longˈlaɪf.lɔːŋ
locklˈɒk
,
Awaitingɐwˈeɪtɪŋ
theðə
sensationsɛnsˈeɪʃən
ofˈɒv
a
shortʃˈɔːt
,
sharpʃˈɑːp
shockʃˈɒk
,
Fromfɹˈɒm
a
cheaptʃˈiːp
andˈænd
chippytʃˈɪpi
choppertʃˈɒpɐ
onˈɒn
a
bigbˈɪɡ
blackblˈæk
blockblˈɒk
!
[Exeunt Pooh.
ALL
andˈænd
Pishpˈɪʃ
.
KO
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
simplysˈɪmpli
appallingɐpˈɔːlɪŋ
!
I
,
whohˈuː
allowedɐlˈaʊd
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
totˈuː
bebˈiː
respitedˈɹɛsˌpaɪt
atˈæt
theðə
lastlˈɑːst
momentmˈəʊmənt
,
simplysˈɪmpli
inˈɪn
orderˈɔːdɐ
totˈuː
benefitbˈɛnɪfˌɪt
mymˈaɪ
nativenˈeɪtɪv
towntˈaʊn
,
aməm
nownˈaʊ
requiredɹɪkwˈaɪəd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
withinwɪðˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
andˈænd
thatðˈæt
bybˈaɪ
a
manmˈæn
whomhˈuːm
I
havehəv
loadedlˈəʊdɪd
withwˈɪð
honoursˈɒnəz
!
Isˈɪz
thisðˈɪs
publicpˈʌblɪk
gratitudeɡɹˈætɪtjˌuːd
?
Isˈɪz
this—- (Enter Nanki-Poo, with a rope in his hands) Go away,
KO
sirsˈɜː
!
Howhˈaʊ
daredˈeə
youjˈuː
?
Aməm
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
totˈuː
bebˈiː
permittedpəmˈɪtɪd
totˈuː
soliloquize
?
NANKI-POO
Ohˈəʊ
,
goɡˈəʊ
onˈɒn
—
don't
mindmˈaɪnd
memˈiː
.
KO
Whatwˈɒt
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
dodə
withwˈɪð
thatðˈæt
ropeɹˈəʊp
?
NANKI-POO
I
aməm
aboutɐbˈaʊt
totˈuː
terminatetˈɜːmɪnˌeɪt
anˈɐn
unendurabIe
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
.
KO
Terminatetˈɜːmɪnˌeɪt
yourjˈɔː
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
nonsensenˈɒnsəns
!
Whatwˈɒt
forfˈɔː
?
NANKI-POO
Becausebɪkˈʌz
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
theðə
girlɡˈɜːl
I
adoreɐdˈɔː
.
KO
Nonsensenˈɒnsəns
,
sirsˈɜː
.
I
won't
permitpɚˈmɪt
itˈɪt
.
I
aməm
a
humanehjuːmˈeɪn
manmˈæn
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
attemptɐtˈɛmpt
anythingˈɛnɪθˌɪŋ
ofˈɒv
theðə
kindkˈaɪnd
I
shallʃˈæl
orderˈɔːdɐ
yourjˈɔː
instantˈɪnstənt
arrestɐɹˈɛst
.
Comekˈʌm
,
sirsˈɜː
,
desistdɪsˈɪst
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
orˈɔː
I
summonsˈʌmən
mymˈaɪ
guardɡˈɑːd
.
NANKI-POO
That's
absurdɐbsˈɜːd
.
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
attemptɐtˈɛmpt
totˈuː
raiseɹˈeɪz
anˈɐn
alarmɐlˈɑːm
,
I
instantlyˈɪnstəntli
performpəfˈɔːm
theðə
Happyhˈæpi
Despatchdɪspˈætʃ
withwˈɪð
thisðˈɪs
daggerdˈæɡɐ
.
KO
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
,
don't
dodə
thatðˈæt
.
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
horriblehˈɒɹɪbəl
!
(
Suddenlysˈʌdənli
)
Whywˈaɪ
,
youjˈuː
cold-bloodedˈkoʊldˈblʌd.ɪd
scoundrelskˈaʊndɹəl
,
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
awareɐwˈeə
thatðˈæt
,
inˈɪn
takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
yourjˈɔː
lifelˈaɪf
,
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
committingkəmˈɪtɪŋ
a
crimekɹˈaɪm
whichwˈɪtʃ
—
whichwˈɪtʃ
—
whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
——
Ohˈəʊ
!
(
Struckstɹˈʌk
bybˈaɪ
anˈɐn
ideaaɪdˈiə
)
Substitutesˈʌbstɪtjˌuːt
!
NANKI-POO
What's
theðə
mattermˈætɐ
?
KO
Isˈɪz
itˈɪt
absolutelyˌæbsəlˈuːtli
certainsˈɜːtən
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
resolvedɹɪˈzɑlvd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
?
NANKI-POO
Absolutelyˌæbsəlˈuːtli
!
KO
Willwˈɪl
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
shakeʃˈeɪk
yourjˈɔː
resolutionɹˌɛzəlˈuːʃən
?
NANKI-POO
Nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
.
KO
Threatsθɹˈɛts
,
entreatiesɛntɹˈiːtɪz
,
prayerspɹɛɹz
—
allˈɔːl
uselessjˈuːsləs
?
NANKI-POO
Allˈɔːl
!
Mymˈaɪ
mindmˈaɪnd
isˈɪz
mademˈeɪd
upˈʌp
.
KO
Thenðˈɛn
,
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
reallyɹˈiəli
meanmˈiːn
whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
saysˈeɪ
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
absolutelyˌæbsəlˈuːtli
resolvedɹɪˈzɑlvd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
whateverwɒtˈɛvɐ
willwˈɪl
shakeʃˈeɪk
yourjˈɔː
determinationdɪtˌɜːmɪnˈeɪʃən
—
don't
spoilspˈɔɪl
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
bybˈaɪ
committingkəmˈɪtɪŋ
suicidesˈuːɪsˌaɪd
,
butbˈʌt
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
handsomelyhˈændsʌmli
atˈæt
theðə
handshˈændz
ofˈɒv
theðə
Publicpˈʌblɪk
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
!
NANKI-POO
I
don't
seesˈiː
howhˈaʊ
thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
benefitbˈɛnɪfˌɪt
memˈiː
.
KO
Youjˈuː
don't
?
Observeɒbzˈɜːv
:
you'll
havehəv
a
monthmˈʌnθ
totˈuː
livelɪv
,
andˈænd
you'll
livelɪv
likelˈaɪk
a
fighting-cock
atˈæt
mymˈaɪ
expenseɛkspˈɛns
.
Whenwˈɛn
theðə
daydˈeɪ
comeskˈʌmz
there'll
bebˈiː
a
grandɡɹˈænd
publicpˈʌblɪk
ceremonialsˌɛɹɪmˈəʊnɪəl
—
you'll
bebˈiː
theðə
centralsˈɛntɹəl
figurefˈɪɡɐ
—
nonəʊ
onewˈɒn
willwˈɪl
attemptɐtˈɛmpt
totˈuː
deprivedɪpɹˈaɪv
youjˈuː
ofˈɒv
thatðˈæt
distinctiondɪstˈɪŋkʃən
.
There'll
bebˈiː
a
processionpɹəsˈɛʃən
—
bandsbˈændz
—
deaddˈɛd
marchmˈɑːtʃ
—
bellsbˈɛlz
tollingtˈəʊlɪŋ
—
allˈɔːl
theðə
girlsɡˈɜːlz
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
—
Yum-Yum
distracteddɪstɹˈæktɪd
—
thenðˈɛn
,
whenwˈɛn
it's
allˈɔːl
overˈəʊvɐ
,
generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
rejoicingsɹɪˈd͡ʒoɪ.sɪŋ
,
andˈænd
a
displaydɪsplˈeɪ
ofˈɒv
fireworksfˈaɪəwɜːks
inˈɪn
theðə
eveningˈiːvnɪŋ
.
Youjˈuː
won't
seesˈiː
themðˈɛm
,
butbˈʌt
they'll
bebˈiː
thereðˈeə
allˈɔːl
theðə
samesˈeɪm
.
NANKI-POO
Dodə
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
Yum-Yum
wouldwˈʊd
reallyɹˈiəli
bebˈiː
distracteddɪstɹˈæktɪd
atˈæt
mymˈaɪ
deathdˈɛθ
?
KO
I
aməm
convincedkənvˈɪnst
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
.
Blessblˈɛs
youjˈuː
,
she's
theðə
mostmˈəʊst
tender-hearted
littlelˈɪtəl
creaturekɹˈiːtʃɐ
aliveɐlˈaɪv
.
NANKI-POO
I
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
sorrysˈɒɹi
totˈuː
causekˈɔːz
herhˈɜː
painpˈeɪn
.
Perhapspəhˈæps
,
afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
ifˈɪf
I
werewˈɜː
totˈuː
withdrawwɪðdɹˈɔː
fromfɹˈɒm
Japandʒəpˈæn
,
andˈænd
traveltɹˈævəl
inˈɪn
Europeˈjʊə.ɹəp
forfˈɔː
a
couplekˈʌpəl
ofˈɒv
yearsjˈiəz
,
I
mightmˈaɪt
contrivekəntɹˈaɪv
totˈuː
forgetfəɡˈɛt
herhˈɜː
.
KO
Ohˈəʊ
,
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
couldkˈʊd
forgetfəɡˈɛt
Yum-Yum
sosˈəʊ
easilyˈiːzɪli
;
andˈænd
,
afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
moremˈɔː
miserablemˈɪzɹəbəl
thanðˈɐn
a
love-blighted
lifelˈaɪf
?
NANKI-POO
Truetɹˈuː
.
KO
Lifelˈaɪf
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
Yum-Yum
—
whywˈaɪ
,
itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
absurdɐbsˈɜːd
!
NANKI-POO
Andˈænd
yetjˈɛt
thereðˈeə
areə(ɹ)
a
goodɡˈʊd
manymˈɛni
peoplepˈiːpəl
inˈɪn
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
whohˈuː
havehəv
totˈuː
endureɛndjˈɔː
itˈɪt
.
KO
Poorpˈɔː
devilsdˈɛvəlz
,
yesjˈɛs
!
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
quitekwaɪt
rightɹˈaɪt
notnˈɒt
totˈuː
bebˈiː
ofˈɒv
theirðˈeə
numberˈnʌmbər
.
NANKI-POO
(
suddenlysˈʌdənli
).
I
won't
bebˈiː
ofˈɒv
theirðˈeə
numberˈnʌmbər
!
KO
Noblenˈəʊbəl
fellowfˈɛləʊ
!
NANKI-POO
I'll
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
howhˈaʊ
we'll
managemˈænɪdʒ
itˈɪt
.
Letlˈɛt
memˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
Yum-Yum
to-morrowtəˈmɒɹəʊ
,
andˈænd
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
beheadbɪhˈɛd
memˈiː
.
KO
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
.
I draw the line at Yum-Yum.
NANKI-POO
Veryvˈɛɹi
goodɡˈʊd
.
If you can draw the line, so can I.
Preparing rope
KO
Stopstˈɒp
,
stopstˈɒp
—
listenlˈɪsən
onewˈɒn
momentmˈəʊmənt
—
bebˈiː
reasonableɹˈiːzənəbəl
.
Howhˈaʊ
cankˈæn
I
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
marryingmˈæɹɪɪŋ
Yum-Yum
ifˈɪf
I'm
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
herhˈɜː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
?
NANKI-POO
Mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
friendfɹˈɛnd
,
she'll
bebˈiː
a
widowwˈɪdəʊ
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
cankˈæn
marrymˈæɹi
herhˈɜː
thenðˈɛn
.
KO
That's
truetɹˈuː
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
.
I
quitekwaɪt
seesˈiː
thatðˈæt
.
Butbˈʌt
,
deardˈiə
memˈiː
!
mymˈaɪ
positionpəzˈɪʃən
duringdjˈɔːɹɪŋ
theðə
nextnˈɛkst
monthmˈʌnθ
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
mostmˈəʊst
unpleasantʌnplˈɛzənt
—
mostmˈəʊst
unpleasantʌnplˈɛzənt
.
NANKI-POO
Notnˈɒt
halfhˈɑːf
sosˈəʊ
unpleasantʌnplˈɛzənt
asəz
mymˈaɪ
positionpəzˈɪʃən
atˈæt
theðə
endˈɛnd
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
.
KO
Butbˈʌt
—
deardˈiə
memˈiː
!—
wellwˈɛl
—
I
agreeɐɡɹˈiː
—
afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
it's
onlyˈəʊnli
puttingˈpʊtɪŋ
offˈɒf
mymˈaɪ
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
forfˈɔː
a
monthmˈʌnθ
.
Butbˈʌt
youjˈuː
won't
prejudicepɹˈɛdʒuːdɪs
herhˈɜː
againstɐɡˈɛnst
memˈiː
,
willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
?
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
,
I've
educatedˈɛdʒuːkˌeɪtɪd
herhˈɜː
totˈuː
bebˈiː
mymˈaɪ
wifewˈaɪf
;
she's
beenbˈiːn
taughttˈɔːt
totˈuː
regardɹɪɡˈɑːd
memˈiː
asəz
a
wisewˈaɪz
andˈænd
goodɡˈʊd
manmˈæn
.
Nownˈaʊ
I
shouldn't like her views on that point disturbed.
NANKI-POO
Trusttɹˈʌst
memˈiː
,
sheʃˈiː
shallʃˈæl
nevernˈɛvɐ
learnlˈɜːn
theðə
truthtɹˈuːθ
fromfɹˈɒm
memˈiː
.
Enter Chorus, Pooh-Bah, and Pish-Tush.
CHORUS
Withwˈɪð
aspectˈæspɛkt
sternstˈɜːn
Andˈænd
gloomyɡlˈuːmi
stridestɹˈaɪd
,
Wewˈiː
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
learnlˈɜːn
Howhˈaʊ
youjˈuː
decidedɪsˈaɪd
.
Don't
hesitatehˈɛsɪtˌeɪt
Yourjˈɔː
choicetʃˈɔɪs
totˈuː
namenˈeɪm
,
A
dreadfuldɹˈɛdfəl
fatefˈeɪt
You'll
suffersˈʌfɐ
allˈɔːl
theðə
samesˈeɪm
.
POOH-BAH
Totˈuː
askˈɑːsk
youjˈuː
whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
meanmˈiːn
totˈuː
dodə
wewˈiː
punctuallypˈʌŋktʃuːəli
appearɐpˈiə
.
KO
Congratulatekənɡɹˈætʃʊlˌeɪt
memˈiː
,
gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
,
I've
foundfˈaʊnd
a
Volunteervˌɒləntˈiə
!
ALL
Theðə
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
equivalentɪkwˈɪvələnt
forfˈɔː
Hearhˈiə
,
Hearhˈiə
,
Hearhˈiə
!
KO
(
presentingpɹɪzˈɛntɪŋ
himhˈɪm
).
'Tis
Nanki-Poo
!
ALL
Hailhˈeɪl
,
Nanki-Poo
!
KO
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
he'll
dodə
?
ALL
Yesjˈɛs
,
yesjˈɛs
,
he'll
dodə
!
KO
Heˈhiː
yieldsjˈiːldz
hishˈɪz
lifelˈaɪf
ifˈɪf
I'll
Yum-Yum
surrendersəɹˈɛndɐ
.
Nownˈaʊ
I
adoreɐdˈɔː
thatðˈæt
girlɡˈɜːl
withwˈɪð
passionpˈæʃən
tendertˈɛndɐ
,
Andˈænd
couldkˈʊd
notnˈɒt
yieldjˈiːld
herhˈɜː
withwˈɪð
a
readyɹˈɛdi
willwˈɪl
,
Orˈɔː
herhˈɜː
allotɐlˈɒt
,
Ifˈɪf
I
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
Adoreɐdˈɔː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
withwˈɪð
passionpˈæʃən
tenderertˈɛndəɹɐ
stillstˈɪl
!
Enter Yum-Yum, Peep-Bo, and Pitti-Sing.
ALL
Ahˈɑː
,
yesjˈɛs
!
Heˈhiː
loveslˈʌvz
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
withwˈɪð
passionpˈæʃən
tenderertˈɛndəɹɐ
stillstˈɪl
!
KO
(
totˈuː
Nanki-Poo
).
Taketˈeɪk
herhˈɜː
—
she's
yoursjˈɔːz
!
[Exit Ko-Ko
NANKI-POO
Theðə
threatenedθɹˈɛtənd
cloudklˈaʊd
hashˈæz
passedpˈɑːst
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
YUM-YUM
Andˈænd
brightlybɹˈaɪtli
shinesʃˈaɪnz
theðə
dawningdˈɔːnɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
;
NANKI-POO
Whatwˈɒt
thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
nightnˈaɪt
maymˈeɪ
comekˈʌm
tootˈuː
soonsˈuːn
,
YUM-YUM
There's
yetjˈɛt
a
monthmˈʌnθ
ofˈɒv
afternoonˌɑːf.təˈnuːn
!
NANKI-POO, POOH-BAH, YUM-YUM, PITTI-SING,
YUM-YUM
andˈænd
PEEP-BO
.
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
theðə
throngθɹˈɒŋ
Ourˈaʊə
joydʒˈɔɪ
advanceɐdvˈæns
,
With laughing song
YUM-YUM
Andˈænd
merrymˈɛɹi
dancedˈɑːns
,
With joyous shout and ringing cheer,
CHORUS
Inaugurateɪnˈɔːɡjʊɹˌeɪt
ourˈaʊə
briefbɹˈiːf
careerkəɹˈiə
!
PITTI-SING
A
daydˈeɪ
,
a
weekwˈiːk
,
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
a
yearjˈiə
—
YUM-YUM
Orˈɔː
farfˈɑː
orˈɔː
nearnˈiə
,
orˈɔː
farfˈɑː
orˈɔː
nearnˈiə
,
POOH-BAH
Life's
eventime
comeskˈʌmz
muchmˈʌtʃ
tootˈuː
soonsˈuːn
,
PITTI-SING
You'll
livelɪv
atˈæt
leastlˈiːst
a
honeymoonhˈʌnɪmˌuːn
!
ALL
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
theðə
throngθɹˈɒŋ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
With joyous shout, etc.
POOH-BAH
Asəz
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
you've
gotɡˈɒt
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
,
Ifˈɪf
Ko-Ko
tellstˈɛlz
usˈʌs
truetɹˈuː
,
'Twere
emptyˈɛmpti
complimentˈkɑmpləmənt
totˈuː
crykɹˈaɪ
"
Longlˈɒŋ
lifelˈaɪf
totˈuː
Nanki-Poo
!"
Butbˈʌt
asəz
onewˈɒn
monthmˈʌnθ
youjˈuː
havehəv
totˈuː
livelɪv
Asəz
fellow-citizen
,
Thisðˈɪs
toasttˈəʊst
withwˈɪð
threeθɹˈiː
timestˈaɪmz
threeθɹˈiː
we'll
giveɡˈɪv
—
"
Longlˈɒŋ
lifelˈaɪf
totˈuː
youjˈuː
—
tilltˈɪl
thenðˈɛn
!"
[Exit
CHORUS
Maymˈeɪ
allˈɔːl
goodɡˈʊd
fortunefˈɔːtʃuːn
prosperpɹˈɒspɐ
youjˈuː
,
Maymˈeɪ
youjˈuː
havehəv
healthhˈɛlθ
andˈænd
richesɹˈɪtʃɪz
tootˈuː
,
Maymˈeɪ
youjˈuː
succeedsəksˈiːd
inˈɪn
allˈɔːl
youjˈuː
dodə
!
Longlˈɒŋ
lifelˈaɪf
totˈuː
youjˈuː
—
tilltˈɪl
thenðˈɛn
!
Dance
Enter Katisha melodramatically
KATISHA
Yourjˈɔː
revelsɹˈɛvəlz
ceasesˈiːs
!
Assistɐsˈɪst
memˈiː
,
allˈɔːl
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
!
CHORUS
Whywˈaɪ
,
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
thisðˈɪs
whosehˈuːz
evilˈiːvəl
eyesˈaɪz
Rainɹˈeɪn
blightblˈaɪt
onˈɒn
ourˈaʊə
festivitiesfɛstˈɪvɪtiz
?
KATISHA
I
claimklˈeɪm
mymˈaɪ
perjuredpˈɜːdʒjɔːd
loverlˈʌvɐ
,
Nanki-Poo
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
foolfˈuːl
!
totˈuː
shunʃˈʌn
delightsdɪlˈaɪts
thatðˈæt
nevernˈɛvɐ
cloyklˈɔɪ
!
CHORUS
Goɡˈəʊ
,
leavelˈiːv
thyðˈaɪ
deadlydˈɛdli
workwˈɜːk
undoneʌndˈʌn
!
KATISHA
Comekˈʌm
backbˈæk
,
ohˈəʊ
,
shallowʃˈæləʊ
foolfˈuːl
!
comekˈʌm
backbˈæk
totˈuː
joydʒˈɔɪ
!
CHORUS
Awayɐwˈeɪ
,
awayɐwˈeɪ
!
ill-favoured
onewˈɒn
!
(aside to Yum-Yum).
NANKI-POO
Ahˈɑː
!
'Tis
Katisha
!
Theðə
maidmˈeɪd
ofˈɒv
whomhˈuːm
I
toldtˈəʊld
youjˈuː
.
About to go
KATISHA
(
detainingdɪtˈeɪnɪŋ
himhˈɪm
).
Nonəʊ
!
Youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
notnˈɒt
goɡˈəʊ
,
Theseðˈiːz
armsˈɑːmz
shallʃˈæl
thusðˈʌs
enfoldɛnfˈəʊld
youjˈuː
!
(
addressingɐdɹˈɛsɪŋ
Nanki-Poo
).
Ohˈəʊ
foolfˈuːl
,
thatðˈæt
fleest
Mymˈaɪ
hallowedhˈæləʊd
joysdʒˈɔɪz
!
Ohˈəʊ
blindblˈaɪnd
,
thatðˈæt
seestˈsiː
Nonəʊ
equipoiseˈɛkwɪpɔɪz
!
Ohˈəʊ
rashɹˈæʃ
,
thatðˈæt
judgest
Fromfɹˈɒm
halfhˈɑːf
,
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
!
Ohˈəʊ
basebˈeɪs
,
thatðˈæt
grudgest
Love's
lightestlˈaɪtəst
doledˈəʊl
!
Thyðˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
unbindʌnˈbaɪnd
,
Ohˈəʊ
foolfˈuːl
,
ohˈəʊ
blindblˈaɪnd
!
Giveɡˈɪv
memˈiː
mymˈaɪ
placeplˈeɪs
,
Ohˈəʊ
rashɹˈæʃ
,
ohˈəʊ
basebˈeɪs
!
CHORUS
Ifˈɪf
she's
thyðˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
,
restoreɹɪˈstɔː
herhˈɜː
placeplˈeɪs
,
Ohˈəʊ
foolfˈuːl
,
ohˈəʊ
blindblˈaɪnd
,
ohˈəʊ
rashɹˈæʃ
,
ohˈəʊ
basebˈeɪs
!
KATISHA
(
addressingɐdɹˈɛsɪŋ
Yum-Yum
).
Pinkpˈɪŋk
cheektʃˈiːk
,
thatðˈæt
rulestɹuːl
Wherewˈeə
wisdomwˈɪsdəm
servessˈɜːvz
!
Brightbɹˈaɪt
eyeˈaɪ
,
thatðˈæt
foolestfuːl
Heroichɪɹˈəʊɪk
nervesnˈɜːvz
!
Roseɹəʊz
liplˈɪp
,
thatðˈæt
scornest
Lore-laden
yearsjˈiəz
!
Smoothsmˈuːð
tonguetˈʌŋ
,
thatðˈæt
warnest
Whohˈuː
rightlyɹˈaɪtli
hearshˈiəz
!
Thyðˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
isˈɪz
nighnˈaɪ
.
Pinkpˈɪŋk
cheektʃˈiːk
,
brightbɹˈaɪt
eyeˈaɪ
!
Thyðˈaɪ
knellnˈɛl
isˈɪz
rungɹˈʌŋ
,
Roseɹəʊz
liplˈɪp
,
smoothsmˈuːð
tonguetˈʌŋ
!
CHORUS
Ifˈɪf
truetɹˈuː
herhˈɜː
taletˈeɪl
,
thyðˈaɪ
knellnˈɛl
isˈɪz
rungɹˈʌŋ
,
Pinkpˈɪŋk
cheektʃˈiːk
,
brightbɹˈaɪt
eyeˈaɪ
,
roseɹəʊz
liplˈɪp
,
smoothsmˈuːð
tonguetˈʌŋ
!
PITTI-SING
Awayɐwˈeɪ
,
nornˈɔː
prosecutepɹˈɒsɪkjˌuːt
yourjˈɔː
questkwˈɛst
—
Fromfɹˈɒm
ourˈaʊə
intentionɪntˈɛnʃən
,
wellwˈɛl
expressedɛkspɹˈɛst
,
Youjˈuː
cannotˈkænɒt
turntˈɜːn
usˈʌs
!
Theðə
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
connubialkəˈnjuː.bi.əl
viewsvjˈuːz
Towardstʊwˈɔːdz
theðə
personpˈɜːsən
youjˈuː
accuseɐkjˈuːz
Doesdəz
notnˈɒt
concernkənsˈɜːn
usˈʌs
!
Forfˈɔː
he's
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
Yum-Yum
—
ALL
Yum-Yum
!
PITTI-SING
Yourjˈɔː
angerˈæŋɡɐ
praypɹˈeɪ
burybˈɛɹi
,
Forfˈɔː
allˈɔːl
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
merrymˈɛɹi
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
hadhˈæd
betterbˈɛtɐ
succumbsəkˈʌm
—
ALL
Cumb
—
cumb
!
PITTI-SING
Andˈænd
joindʒˈɔɪn
ourˈaʊə
expressionsɛkspɹˈɛʃənz
ofˈɒv
gleeɡlˈiː
.
Onˈɒn
thisðˈɪs
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
I
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
bebˈiː
dumbdˈʌm
—
ALL
Dumbdˈʌm
—
dumbdˈʌm
.
PITTI-SING
You'll
findfˈaɪnd
thereðˈeə
areə(ɹ)
manymˈɛni
Who'll
wedwˈɛd
forfˈɔː
a
pennypˈɛni
—
Theðə
wordwˈɜːd
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
guidanceɡˈaɪdəns
isˈɪz
"
Mummˈʌm
"—
ALL
Mummˈʌm
—
mummˈʌm
!
PITTI-SING
There's
lotslˈɒts
ofˈɒv
goodɡˈʊd
fishfˈɪʃ
inˈɪn
theðə
seasˈiː
!
ALL
Onˈɒn
thisðˈɪs
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
wewˈiː
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
bebˈiː
dumbdˈʌm
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
KATISHA
Theðə
hourˈaʊə
ofˈɒv
gladnessɡlˈædnəs
Isˈɪz
deaddˈɛd
andˈænd
goneɡˈɒn
;
Inˈɪn
silentsˈaɪlənt
sadnesssˈædnəs
I
livelɪv
aloneɐlˈəʊn
!
Theðə
hopehˈəʊp
I
cherishedtʃˈɛɹɪʃt
Allˈɔːl
lifelesslˈaɪfləs
lieslˈaɪz
,
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
hashˈæz
perishedpˈɛɹɪʃt
Savesˈeɪv
lovelˈʌv
,
whichwˈɪtʃ
nevernˈɛvɐ
diesdˈaɪz
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
faithlessfˈeɪθləs
onewˈɒn
,
thisðˈɪs
insultɪnˈsʌlt
youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
rueɹˈuː
!
Inˈɪn
vainvˈeɪn
forfˈɔː
mercymˈɜːsi
onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
kneesnˈiːz
you'll
suesuː
.
I'll
teartɛə
theðə
maskmˈɑːsk
fromfɹˈɒm
yourjˈɔː
disguisingdɪsɡˈaɪzɪŋ
!
(aside).
NANKI-POO
Nownˈaʊ
comeskˈʌmz
theðə
blowblˈəʊ
!
KATISHA
Preparepɹɪpˈeə
yourselvesjɔːsˈɛlvz
forfˈɔː
newsnjˈuːz
surprisingsəpɹˈaɪzɪŋ
!
(aside).
NANKI-POO
Howhˈaʊ
foilfˈɔɪl
mymˈaɪ
foefˈəʊ
?
KATISHA
Nonəʊ
minstrelmˈɪnstɹəl
heˈhiː
,
despitedɪspˈaɪt
bravadobɹævˈɑːdəʊ
!
(aside, struck by an idea).
YUM-YUM
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
I
knownˈəʊ
!
KATISHA
Heˈhiː
isˈɪz
theðə
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
——
(
Nanki-Poo
,
Yum-Yum
,
andˈænd
Choruskˈɔːɹəs
,
interruptingˌɪntəɹˈʌptɪŋ
,
singsˈɪŋ
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
wordswˈɜːdz
,
totˈuː
drowndɹˈaʊn
herhˈɜː
voicevˈɔɪs
)
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
Inˈɪn
vainvˈeɪn
youjˈuː
interruptˈɪntəɹˌʌpt
withwˈɪð
thisðˈɪs
tornadotɔːnˈeɪdəʊ
!
Heˈhiː
isˈɪz
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
——
ALL
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
KATISHA
I'll
spoilspˈɔɪl
——
ALL
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
KATISHA
Yourjˈɔː
gayɡˈeɪ
gambadoɡæmˈbeɪ.dəʊ
!
Heˈhiː
isˈɪz
theðə
sonsˈʌn
——
ALL
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
KATISHA
Ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
——
ALL
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
KATISHA
Theðə
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
——
ALL
O
nini
!
bikkuri
shakkuri
totˈuː
!
oya
!
oya
!
THE OTHERS
Yejiː
torrentstˈɒɹənts
roarɹˈɔː
!
We'll
hearhˈiə
nonəʊ
moremˈɔː
,
Yejiː
tempeststˈɛmpəsts
howlhˈaʊl
!
Ill-omened
owlˈaʊl
.
Yourjˈɔː
wrathɹˈæθ
outpourˈaʊ̯tpɔː(ɹ)
Totˈuː
joydʒˈɔɪ
wewˈiː
soarsˈɔː
,
Withwˈɪð
angryˈæŋɡɹi
growlɡɹˈaʊl
!
Despitedɪspˈaɪt
yourjˈɔː
scowlskˈaʊl
!
Dodə
yejiː
yourjˈɔː
worstwˈɜːst
,
mymˈaɪ
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
Theðə
echoesˈɛkəʊz
ofˈɒv
ourˈaʊə
festivalfˈɛstɪvəl
callkˈɔːl
Shallʃˈæl
riseɹˈaɪz
triumphanttɹaɪˈʌmfənt
overˈəʊvɐ
allˈɔːl
!
Shallʃˈæl
riseɹˈaɪz
triumphanttɹaɪˈʌmfənt
overˈəʊvɐ
allˈɔːl
!
Preparepɹɪpˈeə
forfˈɔː
woewˈəʊ
,
Awayɐwˈeɪ
youjˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
,
Yejiː
haughtyhˈɔːti
lordslˈɔːdz
,
Collectkəˈlɛkt
yourjˈɔː
hordeshˈɔːdz
;
Atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
I
goɡˈəʊ
Proclaimpɹəklˈeɪm
yourjˈɔː
woewˈəʊ
Mikado-wards
,
Inˈɪn
dismaldˈɪzməl
chordskˈɔːdz
Mymˈaɪ
wrongsɹˈɒŋz
withwˈɪð
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
shallʃˈæl
Wewˈiː
dodə
notnˈɒt
heedhˈiːd
theirðˈeə
dismaldˈɪzməl
bebˈiː
crownedkɹˈaʊnd
!
soundsˈaʊnd
Mymˈaɪ
wrongsɹˈɒŋz
withwˈɪð
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
shallʃˈæl
Forfˈɔː
joydʒˈɔɪ
reignsɹˈeɪnz
everywhereˈɛvɹɪwˌeə
bebˈiː
crownedkɹˈaʊnd
!
aroundɐɹˈaʊnd
.
(Katisha rushes furiously up stage, clearing the crowd away right
THE OTHERS
andˈænd
leftlˈɛft
,
finishingfˈɪnɪʃɪŋ
onˈɒn
stepsstˈɛps
atˈæt
theðə
backbˈæk
ofˈɒv
stagestˈeɪdʒ
)
ACT II.
SCENE.
END OF ACT I
—
Ko-Ko's
Gardenɡˈɑːdən
.
Yum-Yum
discovereddɪskˈʌvəd
seatedsˈiːtɪd
atˈæt
herhˈɜː
bridalbɹˈaɪdəl
toilettˈɔɪlət
,
surroundedsəɹˈaʊndɪd
bybˈaɪ
maidensmˈeɪdənz
,
whohˈuː
areə(ɹ)
dressingdɹˈɛsɪŋ
herhˈɜː
hairhˈeə
andˈænd
paintingpˈeɪntɪŋ
herhˈɜː
facefˈeɪs
andˈænd
lipslˈɪps
,
asəz
sheʃˈiː
judgesdʒˈʌdʒɪz
ofˈɒv
theðə
effectɪfˈɛkt
inˈɪn
a
mirrormˈɪɹɐ
.
SOLOsˈəʊləʊ
—
PITTI-SING
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
GIRLSɡˈɜːlz
.
CHORUS
Braidbɹˈeɪd
theðə
ravenˈɹeɪvn̩
hairhˈeə
—
Weavewˈiːv
theðə
supplesˈʌpəl
tresstɹˈɛs
—
Deckdˈɛk
theðə
maidenmˈeɪdən
fairfˈeə
Inˈɪn
herhˈɜː
lovelinesslˈʌvlinəs
—
Paintpˈeɪnt
theðə
prettypɹˈɪti
facefˈeɪs
—
Dyedˈaɪ
theðə
coralkˈɒɹəl
liplˈɪp
—
Emphasizeˈɛm.fə.saɪz
theðə
graceɡɹˈeɪs
Ofˈɒv
herhˈɜː
ladyshiplˈeɪdɪʃˌɪp
!
Artˈɑːt
andˈænd
naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
,
thusðˈʌs
alliedəˈlaɪd
,
Goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
makemˈeɪk
a
prettypɹˈɪti
bridebɹˈaɪd
.
PITTI-SING
Sitsˈɪt
withwˈɪð
downcastdˈaʊnkɑːst
eyeˈaɪ
Letlˈɛt
itˈɪt
brimbɹˈɪm
withwˈɪð
dewdjˈuː
—
Trytɹˈaɪ
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
cankˈæn
crykɹˈaɪ
—
Wewˈiː
willwˈɪl
dodə
sosˈəʊ
,
tootˈuː
.
Whenwˈɛn
you're
summonedsˈʌmənd
,
startstˈɑːt
Likelˈaɪk
a
frightenedfɹˈaɪtənd
roeɹˈəʊ
—
Flutterflˈʌtɐ
,
littlelˈɪtəl
hearthˈɑːt
,
Colourkˈʌlɐ
,
comekˈʌm
andˈænd
goɡˈəʊ
!
Modestymˈɒdəsti
atˈæt
marriage-tide
Wellwˈɛl
becomesbɪkˈʌmz
a
prettypɹˈɪti
bridebɹˈaɪd
!
CHORUS
Braidbɹˈeɪd
theðə
ravenˈɹeɪvn̩
hairhˈeə
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Exeunt Pitti-Sing, Peep-Bo, and
CHORUS
Choruskˈɔːɹəs
.
YUM-YUM
Yesjˈɛs
,
I
aməm
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
beautifulbjˈuːtɪfəl
!
Sometimessˈʌmtaɪmz
I
sitsˈɪt
andˈænd
wonderwˈʌndɐ
,
inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
artlessˈɑːtləs
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
waywˈeɪ
,
whywˈaɪ
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
sosˈəʊ
muchmˈʌtʃ
moremˈɔː
attractiveɐtɹˈæktɪv
thanðˈɐn
anybodyˈɛnɪbˌɒdi
elseˈɛls
inˈɪn
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
worldwˈɜːld
.
Cankˈæn
thisðˈɪs
bebˈiː
vanityvˈænɪti
?
Nonəʊ
!
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
isˈɪz
lovelylˈʌvli
andˈænd
rejoicesɹɪdʒˈɔɪsɪz
inˈɪn
herhˈɜː
lovelinesslˈʌvlinəs
.
I
aməm
a
childtʃˈaɪld
ofˈɒv
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
,
andˈænd
taketˈeɪk
afterˈɑːftɐ
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
.
Theðə
sunsˈʌn
,
whosehˈuːz
raysɹˈeɪz
Areə(ɹ)
allˈɔːl
ablazeɐblˈeɪz
Withwˈɪð
ever-living
gloryɡlˈɔːɹi
,
Doesdəz
notnˈɒt
denydɪnˈaɪ
Hishˈɪz
majestymˈædʒəsti
—
Heˈhiː
scornsskˈɔːnz
totˈuː
telltˈɛl
a
storystˈɔːɹi
!
Heˈhiː
don't
exclaimɛksklˈeɪm
,
"
I
blushblˈʌʃ
forfˈɔː
shameʃˈeɪm
,
Sosˈəʊ
kindlykˈaɪndli
bebˈiː
indulgentɪndˈʌldʒənt
.
"
Butbˈʌt
,
fiercefˈiəs
andˈænd
boldbˈəʊld
,
Inˈɪn
fieryfˈaɪəɹi
goldɡˈəʊld
,
Heˈhiː
gloriesɡlˈɔːɹɪz
effulgentɪfˈʌldʒənt
!
I
meanmˈiːn
totˈuː
ruleɹˈuːl
theðə
earthˈɜːθ
,
Asəz
heˈhiː
theðə
skyskˈaɪ
—
Wewˈiː
reallyɹˈiəli
knownˈəʊ
ourˈaʊə
worthwˈɜːθ
,
Theðə
sunsˈʌn
andˈænd
I
!
Observeɒbzˈɜːv
hishˈɪz
flameflˈeɪm
,
Thatðˈæt
placidplˈæsɪd
damedˈeɪm
,
Theðə
moon's
Celestialsəlˈɛstjəl
Highnesshˈaɪnəs
;
There's
notnˈɒt
a
tracetɹˈeɪs
Uponəpˈɒn
herhˈɜː
facefˈeɪs
Ofˈɒv
diffidencedˈɪfɪdəns
orˈɔː
shynessʃˈaɪnəs
:
Sheʃˈiː
borrowsbˈɒɹəʊz
lightlˈaɪt
Thatðˈæt
,
throughθɹˈuː
theðə
nightnˈaɪt
,
Mankindmæŋkˈaɪnd
maymˈeɪ
allˈɔːl
acclaimɐklˈeɪm
herhˈɜː
!
Andˈænd
,
truthtɹˈuːθ
totˈuː
telltˈɛl
,
Sheʃˈiː
lightslˈaɪts
upˈʌp
wellwˈɛl
,
Sosˈəʊ
I
,
forfˈɔː
onewˈɒn
,
don't
blameblˈeɪm
herhˈɜː
!
Ahˈɑː
,
praypɹˈeɪ
makemˈeɪk
nonəʊ
mistakemɪstˈeɪk
,
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
notnˈɒt
shyʃˈaɪ
;
We're
veryvˈɛɹi
widewˈaɪd
awakeɐwˈeɪk
,
Theðə
moonmˈuːn
andˈænd
I
!
Enter Pitti-Sing and Peep-Bo.
YUM-YUM
Yesjˈɛs
,
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
seemssˈiːmz
totˈuː
smilesmˈaɪl
uponəpˈɒn
memˈiː
.
I
aməm
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
totˈuː
theðə
manmˈæn
I
lovelˈʌv
bestbˈɛst
andˈænd
I
believebɪlˈiːv
I
aməm
theðə
veryvˈɛɹi
happiesthˈæpɪəst
girlɡˈɜːl
inˈɪn
Japandʒəpˈæn
!
PEEP-BO
Theðə
happiesthˈæpɪəst
girlɡˈɜːl
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
,
forfˈɔː
sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
totˈuː
bebˈiː
enviedˈɛnvɪd
whohˈuː
hashˈæz
attainedɐtˈeɪnd
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
inˈɪn
allˈɔːl
butbˈʌt
perfectionpəfˈɛkʃən
.
YUM-YUM
Inˈɪn
"
allˈɔːl
butbˈʌt
"
perfectionpəfˈɛkʃən
?
PEEP-BO
Wellwˈɛl
,
deardˈiə
,
itˈɪt
can't
bebˈiː
denieddɪnˈaɪd
thatðˈæt
theðə
factfˈækt
thatðˈæt
yourjˈɔː
husbandhˈʌsbənd
isˈɪz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
isˈɪz
,
inˈɪn
itsˈɪts
waywˈeɪ
,
a
drawbackdɹˈɔːbæk
.
It does seem to take the top off it, you know.
PITTI-SING
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
thatðˈæt
.
Itˈɪt
allˈɔːl
dependsdɪpˈɛndz
!
PEEP-BO
Atˈæt
allˈɔːl
eventsɪvˈɛnts
,
heˈhiː
willwˈɪl
findfˈaɪnd
itˈɪt
a
drawbackdɹˈɔːbæk
.
PITTI-SING
Notnˈɒt
necessarilynˌɛsɪsˈɛɹəli
.
Blessblˈɛs
youjˈuː
,
itˈɪt
allˈɔːl
dependsdɪpˈɛndz
!
YUM-YUM
(
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
).
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
itˈɪt
veryvˈɛɹi
indelicateˌɪndˈɛlɪkət
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
totˈuː
referɹɪfˈɜː
totˈuː
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
onˈɒn
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
daydˈeɪ
.
Ifˈɪf
mymˈaɪ
marriedmˈæɹɪd
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
isˈɪz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
—
totˈuː
bebˈiː
—
PEEP-BO
Cutkˈʌt
shortʃˈɔːt
.
YUM-YUM
Wellwˈɛl
,
cutkˈʌt
shortʃˈɔːt
—
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
can't
youjˈuː
letlˈɛt
memˈiː
forgetfəɡˈɛt
itˈɪt
?
(
Weepingwˈiːpɪŋ
)
Enter Nanki-Poo, followed by Go-To.
NANKI-POO
Yum-Yum
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
—
andˈænd
onˈɒn
herhˈɜː
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
mornmˈɔːn
!
YUM-YUM
(
sobbingsˈɒbɪŋ
).
They've
beenbˈiːn
remindingɹɪmˈaɪndɪŋ
memˈiː
thatðˈæt
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
you're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
!
(
Burstsbˈɜːsts
intoˈɪntʊ
tearstɪɹz
)
PITTI-SING
Yesjˈɛs
,
we've
beenbˈiːn
remindingɹɪmˈaɪndɪŋ
herhˈɜː
thatðˈæt
you're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
.
Bursts into tears
PEEP-BO
It's
quitekwaɪt
truetɹˈuː
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
,
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
totˈuː
bebˈiː
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
!
Bursts into tears
(aside).
NANKI-POO
Humphhˈʌmf
!
Nownˈaʊ
,
somesˈʌm
bridegroomsbɹˈaɪdɡɹuːmz
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
depresseddɪpɹˈɛst
bybˈaɪ
thisðˈɪs
sortsˈɔːt
ofˈɒv
thingθˈɪŋ
!
(
Aloudɐlˈaʊd
)
A
monthmˈʌnθ
?
Wellwˈɛl
,
what's
a
monthmˈʌnθ
?
Bahbˈɑː
!
Theseðˈiːz
divisionsdɪvˈɪʒənz
ofˈɒv
timetˈaɪm
areə(ɹ)
purelypjˈɔːli
arbitraryˈɑːbɪtɹəɹi
.
Whohˈuː
sayssˈɛz
twenty-fourˌtwɛntiˈfɔː
hoursˈaʊəz
makemˈeɪk
a
daydˈeɪ
?
PITTI-SING
There's
a
popularpˈɒpjʊlɐ
impressionɪmpɹˈɛʃən
totˈuː
thatðˈæt
effectɪfˈɛkt
.
NANKI-POO
Thenðˈɛn
we'll
effaceɪfˈeɪs
itˈɪt
.
We'll
callkˈɔːl
eachˈiːtʃ
secondˈsɛk.ənd
a
minuteˈmɪnɪt
—
eachˈiːtʃ
minuteˈmɪnɪt
anˈɐn
hourˈaʊə
—
eachˈiːtʃ
hourˈaʊə
a
daydˈeɪ
—
andˈænd
eachˈiːtʃ
daydˈeɪ
a
yearjˈiə
.
Atˈæt
thatðˈæt
rateɹˈeɪt
we've
aboutɐbˈaʊt
thirtyθˈɜːti
yearsjˈiəz
ofˈɒv
marriedmˈæɹɪd
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
beforebɪfˈɔː
usˈʌs
!
PEEP-BO
Andˈænd
,
atˈæt
thatðˈæt
rateɹˈeɪt
,
thisðˈɪs
interviewˈɪntəvjˌuː
hashˈæz
alreadyɔːlɹˈɛdi
lastedlˈɑːstɪd
fourfˈɔː
hoursˈaʊəz
andˈænd
three-quartersθɹiˈk(w)ɔɹtɚz
!
[Exit
PEEP-BO
Peep-Bo
.
YUM-YUM
(
stillstˈɪl
sobbingsˈɒbɪŋ
).
Yesjˈɛs
.
Howhˈaʊ
timetˈaɪm
fliesflˈaɪz
whenwˈɛn
onewˈɒn
isˈɪz
thoroughlyθˈʌɹəli
enjoyingɛndʒˈɔɪɪŋ
oneselfwɒnsˈɛlf
!
NANKI-POO
That's
theðə
waywˈeɪ
totˈuː
looklˈʊk
atˈæt
itˈɪt
!
Don't
let's
bebˈiː
downhearteddˈaʊnhɑːtɪd
!
There's
a
silversˈɪlvɐ
lininglˈaɪnɪŋ
totˈuː
everyˈɛvɹi
cloudklˈaʊd
.
YUM-YUM
Certainlysˈɜːtənli
.
Let's
—
let's
bebˈiː
perfectlypˈɜːfɛktlˌi
happyhˈæpi
!
(
Almostˈɔːlməʊst
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
)
GO-TO
Bybˈaɪ
allˈɔːl
meansmˈiːnz
.
Let's
—
let's
thoroughlyθˈʌɹəli
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
.
PITTI-SING
It's
—
it's
absurdɐbsˈɜːd
totˈuː
crykɹˈaɪ
!
(
Tryingtɹˈaɪɪŋ
totˈuː
forcefˈɔːs
a
laugh)
YUM-YUM
Quitekwaɪt
ridiculousɹɪdˈɪkjʊləs
!
(
Tryingtɹˈaɪɪŋ
totˈuː
laughlˈɑːf
)
All break into a forced and melancholy laugh
MADRIGAL
YUM-YUM
,
PITTI-SING
,
NANKI-POO
,
andˈænd
PISH-TUSH
Brightlybɹˈaɪtli
dawnsdˈɔːnz
ourˈaʊə
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
;
Joyousdʒˈɔɪəs
hourˈaʊə
,
wewˈiː
giveɡˈɪv
theeðˈiː
greetingɡɹˈiːtɪŋ
!
Whitherwˈɪðɐ
,
whitherwˈɪðɐ
artˈɑːt
thouðaʊ
fleetingflˈiːtɪŋ
?
Ficklefˈɪkəl
momentmˈəʊmənt
,
pritheepɹˈɪθiː
staystˈeɪ
!
Whatwˈɒt
thoughðˈəʊ
mortalmˈɔːtəl
joysdʒˈɔɪz
bebˈiː
hollowhˈɒləʊ
?
Pleasuresplˈɛʒəz
comekˈʌm
,
ifˈɪf
sorrowssˈɒɹəʊz
followfˈɒləʊ
:
Thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
tocsinˈtɒksɪn
soundsˈaʊnd
,
ereˈeə
longlˈɒŋ
,
Dingdˈɪŋ
dongdˈɒŋ
!
Dingdˈɪŋ
dongdˈɒŋ
!
Yet until the shadows fall
MADRIGAL
Overˈəʊvɐ
onewˈɒn
andˈænd
overˈəʊvɐ
allˈɔːl
,
Singsˈɪŋ
a
merrymˈɛɹi
madrigalmˈædɹɪɡəl
—
A
madrigalmˈædɹɪɡəl
!
Fal-la
—
fal-la
!
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Ending in tears
MADRIGAL
Letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
drydɹˈaɪ
theðə
readyɹˈɛdi
teartɛə
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
hoursˈaʊəz
areə(ɹ)
surelyʃˈɔːli
creepingkɹˈiːpɪŋ
Little need for woeful weeping,
MADRIGAL
Tilltˈɪl
theðə
sadsˈæd
sundownsˈʌndaʊn
isˈɪz
nearnˈiə
.
Allˈɔːl
mustmˈʌst
sipsˈɪp
theðə
cupkˈʌp
ofˈɒv
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
—
I
to-daytəˈdeɪ
andˈænd
thouðaʊ
to-morrowtəˈmɒɹəʊ
;
Thisðˈɪs
theðə
closekləʊz
ofˈɒv
everyˈɛvɹi
songsˈɒŋ
—
Dingdˈɪŋ
dongdˈɒŋ
!
Dingdˈɪŋ
dongdˈɒŋ
!
What, though solemn shadows fall,
MADRIGAL
Soonersˈuːnɐ
,
laterlˈeɪtɐ
,
overˈəʊvɐ
allˈɔːl
?
Singsˈɪŋ
a
merrymˈɛɹi
madrigalmˈædɹɪɡəl
—
A
madrigalmˈædɹɪɡəl
!
Fal-la
—
fal-la
!
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Ending in tears
[Exeunt Pitti-Sing and
(Nanki-Poo embraces Yum-Yum.
Enter Ko-Ko.
PISH-TUSH
Nanki-Poo
releasesɹɪlˈiːsɪz
Yum-Yum
)
KO
Goɡˈəʊ
onˈɒn
—
don't
mindmˈaɪnd
memˈiː
.
NANKI-POO
I'm
afraidɐfɹˈeɪd
we're
distressingdɪstɹˈɛsɪŋ
youjˈuː
.
KO
Nevernˈɛvɐ
mindmˈaɪnd
,
I
mustmˈʌst
getɡˈɛt
usedjuːzd
totˈuː
itˈɪt
.
Onlyˈəʊnli
pleaseplˈiːz
dodə
itˈɪt
bybˈaɪ
degreesdɪɡɹˈiːz
.
Beginbɪɡˈɪn
bybˈaɪ
puttingˈpʊtɪŋ
yourjˈɔː
armˈɑːm
roundɹˈaʊnd
herhˈɜː
waistwˈeɪst
.
(
Nanki-Poo
doesdəz
sosˈəʊ
)
Thereðˈeə
;
letlˈɛt
memˈiː
getɡˈɛt
usedjuːzd
totˈuː
thatðˈæt
firstfˈɜːst
.
YUM-YUM
Ohˈəʊ
,
wouldn't
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
retireɹɪtˈaɪə
?
Itˈɪt
mustmˈʌst
painpˈeɪn
youjˈuː
totˈuː
seesˈiː
usˈʌs
sosˈəʊ
affectionateɐfˈɛkʃənət
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
!
KO
Nonəʊ
,
I
mustmˈʌst
learnlˈɜːn
totˈuː
bearbˈeə
itˈɪt
!
Nownˈaʊ
obligeəblˈaɪdʒ
memˈiː
bybˈaɪ
allowingɐlˈaʊɪŋ
herhˈɜː
headhˈɛd
totˈuː
restɹˈɛst
onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
shoulderʃˈəʊldɐ
.
NANKI-POO
Likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
?
(
Heˈhiː
doesdəz
sosˈəʊ
.
Ko-Ko
muchmˈʌtʃ
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
)
KO
I
aməm
muchmˈʌtʃ
obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
totˈuː
youjˈuː
.
Nownˈaʊ
—
kisskˈɪs
herhˈɜː
!
(
Heˈhiː
doesdəz
sosˈəʊ
.
Ko-Ko
writhesɹˈaɪðz
withwˈɪð
anguishˈæŋɡwɪʃ
)
Thankθˈæŋk
youjˈuː
—
it's
simplesˈɪmpəl
torturetˈɔːtʃɐ
!
YUM-YUM
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
,
bearbˈeə
upˈʌp
.
Afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
it's
onlyˈəʊnli
forfˈɔː
a
monthmˈʌnθ
.
KO
Nonəʊ
.
It's
nonəʊ
usejuːs
deludingdɪlˈuːdɪŋ
oneselfwɒnsˈɛlf
withwˈɪð
falsefˈɒls
hopeshˈəʊps
.
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
YUMjˈʌm
.
Whatwˈɒt
dodə
youjˈuː
meanmˈiːn
?
KO
(
totˈuː
Yum-Yum
).
Mymˈaɪ
childtʃˈaɪld
—
mymˈaɪ
poorpˈɔː
childtʃˈaɪld
!
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Howhˈaʊ
shallʃˈæl
I
breakbɹˈeɪk
itˈɪt
totˈuː
herhˈɜː
?
(
Aloudɐlˈaʊd
)
Mymˈaɪ
littlelˈɪtəl
bridebɹˈaɪd
thatðˈæt
waswˈɒz
totˈuː
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
?
YUM-YUM
(
delighteddɪlˈaɪtɪd
).
Waswˈɒz
totˈuː
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
?
KO
Yesjˈɛs
,
youjˈuː
nevernˈɛvɐ
cankˈæn
bebˈiː
minemˈaɪn
!
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
YUMjˈʌm
.
(
simultaneouslysˌɪməltˈeɪniəsli
,
inˈɪn
ecstacyˈɛk.stə.si
)
Whatwˈɒt
!/
I'm
sosˈəʊ
gladɡlˈæd
!
KO
I've
justdʒˈʌst
ascertainedˌæsətˈeɪnd
thatðˈæt
,
bybˈaɪ
theðə
Mikado's
lawlˈɔː
,
whenwˈɛn
a
marriedmˈæɹɪd
manmˈæn
isˈɪz
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
hishˈɪz
wifewˈaɪf
isˈɪz
buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
.
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
YUMjˈʌm
.
Buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
!
KO
Buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
.
It's
a
mostmˈəʊst
unpleasantʌnplˈɛzənt
deathdˈɛθ
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
whomhˈuːm
diddˈɪd
youjˈuː
getɡˈɛt
thatðˈæt
fromfɹˈɒm
?
KO
Ohˈəʊ
,
fromfɹˈɒm
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
.
He's
mymˈaɪ
Solicitorsəlˈɪsɪtɐ
.
YUM-YUM
Butbˈʌt
heˈhiː
maymˈeɪ
bebˈiː
mistakenmɪstˈeɪkən
!
KO
Sosˈəʊ
I
thoughtθˈɔːt
;
sosˈəʊ
I
consultedkənsˈʌltɪd
theðə
Attorneyɐtˈɜːni
Generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
,
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
,
theðə
Mastermˈɑːstɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Rollsɹˈəʊlz
,
theðə
Judgedʒˈʌdʒ
Ordinaryˈɔːdɪnəɹi
,
andˈænd
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
.
They're
allˈɔːl
ofˈɒv
theðə
samesˈeɪm
opinionəpˈɪniən
.
Nevernˈɛvɐ
knewnjˈuː
suchsˈʌtʃ
unanimityjuːnɐnˈɪmɪti
onˈɒn
a
pointpˈɔɪnt
ofˈɒv
lawlˈɔː
inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
lifelˈaɪf
!
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
stopstˈɒp
a
bitbˈɪt
!
Thisðˈɪs
lawlˈɔː
hashˈæz
nevernˈɛvɐ
beenbˈiːn
putpʊt
inˈɪn
forcefˈɔːs
.
KO
Notnˈɒt
yetjˈɛt
.
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
,
flirtingflˈɜːtɪŋ
isˈɪz
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
crimekɹˈaɪm
punishablepˈʌnɪʃəbəl
withwˈɪð
decapitationdɪkˌæpɪtˈeɪʃən
,
andˈænd
marriedmˈæɹɪd
menmˈɛn
nevernˈɛvɐ
flirtflˈɜːt
.
NANKI-POO
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
theyðˈeɪ
don't
.
I
quitekwaɪt
forgotfəɡˈɒt
thatðˈæt
!
Wellwˈɛl
,
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
I
maymˈeɪ
taketˈeɪk
itˈɪt
thatðˈæt
mymˈaɪ
dreamdɹˈiːm
ofˈɒv
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
isˈɪz
atˈæt
anˈɐn
endˈɛnd
!
YUM-YUM
Darlingdˈɑːlɪŋ
—
I
don't
wantwˈɒnt
totˈuː
appearɐpˈiə
selfishsˈɛlfɪʃ
,
andˈænd
I
lovelˈʌv
youjˈuː
withwˈɪð
allˈɔːl
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
—
I
don't
supposesʌpˈəʊz
I
shallʃˈæl
everˈɛvɐ
lovelˈʌv
anybodyˈɛnɪbˌɒdi
elseˈɛls
halfhˈɑːf
asəz
muchmˈʌtʃ
—
butbˈʌt
whenwˈɛn
I
agreedɐɡɹˈiːd
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
—
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
—
I
hadhˈæd
nonəʊ
ideaaɪdˈiə
—
petpˈɛt
—
thatðˈæt
I
shouldʃˈʊd
havehəv
totˈuː
bebˈiː
buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
!
NANKI-POO
Nornˈɔː
I
!
It's
theðə
veryvˈɛɹi
firstfˈɜːst
I've
heardhˈɜːd
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
!
YUM-YUM
Itˈɪt
—
itˈɪt
makesmˈeɪks
a
differencedˈɪfɹəns
,
doesn't
itˈɪt
?
NANKI-POO
Itˈɪt
doesdəz
makemˈeɪk
a
differencedˈɪfɹəns
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
.
YUM-YUM
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
—
burialbˈɛɹɪəl
aliveɐlˈaɪv
—
it's
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
stuffystˈʌfi
deathdˈɛθ
!
NANKI-POO
I
callkˈɔːl
itˈɪt
a
beastbˈiːst
ofˈɒv
a
deathdˈɛθ
.
YUM-YUM
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
mymˈaɪ
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
,
don't
youjˈuː
?
NANKI-POO
Yesjˈɛs
,
andˈænd
I
seesˈiː
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
.
Ifˈɪf
I
insistɪnsˈɪst
onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
carryingkˈæɹɪɪŋ
outˈaʊt
yourjˈɔː
promisepɹˈɒmɪs
,
I
doomdˈuːm
youjˈuː
totˈuː
a
hideoushˈɪdiəs
deathdˈɛθ
;
ifˈɪf
I
releaseɹəˈliːs
youjˈuː
,
youjˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
Ko-Ko
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
!
TRIO
—
YUM-YUM
,
NANKI-POO
,
andˈænd
KO-KO
.
YUM-YUM
Here's
a
how-de-do
!
Ifˈɪf
I
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
,
Whenwˈɛn
yourjˈɔː
timetˈaɪm
hashˈæz
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
perishpˈɛɹɪʃ
,
Thenðˈɛn
theðə
maidenmˈeɪdən
whomhˈuːm
youjˈuː
cherishtʃˈɛɹɪʃ
Mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
slaughteredslˈɔːtəd
,
tootˈuː
!
Here's
a
how-de-do
!
NANKI-POO
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
messmˈɛs
!
Inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
,
orˈɔː
lesslˈɛs
,
I
mustmˈʌst
diedˈaɪ
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
a
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
!
Letlˈɛt
theðə
bitterbˈɪtɐ
tearstɪɹz
I'm
sheddingʃˈɛdɪŋ
Witnesswˈɪtnəs
mymˈaɪ
distressdɪstɹˈɛs
,
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
messmˈɛs
!
KO
Here's
a
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
thingsθˈɪŋz
Totˈuː
herhˈɜː
lifelˈaɪf
sheʃˈiː
clingsklˈɪŋz
!
Matrimonialmˌætɹɪmˈəʊnɪəl
devotiondɪvˈəʊʃən
Doesn't
seemsˈiːm
totˈuː
suitsˈuːt
herhˈɜː
notionnˈəʊʃən
—
Burialbˈɛɹɪəl
itˈɪt
bringsbɹˈɪŋz
!
Here's
a
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
thingsθˈɪŋz
!
ENSEMBLE
YUM-YUM
andˈænd
NANKI-POO
.
KO-KO
Withwˈɪð
a
passionpˈæʃən
that's
intenseɪntˈɛns
Withwˈɪð
a
passionpˈæʃən
that's
intenseɪntˈɛns
I
worshipwˈɜːʃɪp
andˈænd
adoreɐdˈɔː
,
Youjˈuː
worshipwˈɜːʃɪp
andˈænd
adoreɐdˈɔː
,
Butbˈʌt
theðə
lawslˈɔːz
ofˈɒv
commonkˈɒmən
sensesˈɛns
Butbˈʌt
theðə
lawslˈɔːz
ofˈɒv
commonkˈɒmən
sensesˈɛns
Wewˈiː
oughtn't
totˈuː
ignoreɪɡnˈɔː
.
Youjˈuː
oughtn't
totˈuː
ignoreɪɡnˈɔː
.
Ifˈɪf
whatwˈɒt
heˈhiː
sayssˈɛz
isˈɪz
truetɹˈuː
,
Ifˈɪf
whatwˈɒt
I
saysˈeɪ
isˈɪz
truetɹˈuː
,
'Tis
deathdˈɛθ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
!
'Tis
deathdˈɛθ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
!
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
thingsθˈɪŋz
!
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
thingsθˈɪŋz
!
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
how-de-do
!
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
how-de-do
!
[Exit
KO
(
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
upˈʌp
totˈuː
Nanki-Poo
).
Mymˈaɪ
poorpˈɔː
boybˈɔɪ
,
I'm
reallyɹˈiəli
veryvˈɛɹi
sorrysˈɒɹi
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
.
NANKI-POO
Thanksθˈæŋks
,
oldˈəʊld
fellowfˈɛləʊ
.
I'm
sureʃˈɔː
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
.
KO
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
I'm
quitekwaɪt
helplesshˈɛlpləs
.
NANKI-POO
I
quitekwaɪt
seesˈiː
thatðˈæt
.
KO
I
can't
conceivekənsˈiːv
anythingˈɛnɪθˌɪŋ
moremˈɔː
distressingdɪstɹˈɛsɪŋ
thanðˈɐn
totˈuː
havehəv
one's
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
brokenbɹˈəʊkən
offˈɒf
atˈæt
theðə
lastlˈɑːst
momentmˈəʊmənt
.
Butbˈʌt
youjˈuː
shan't
bebˈiː
disappointeddˌɪsɐpˈɔɪntɪd
ofˈɒv
a
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
—
youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
minemˈaɪn
.
NANKI-POO
It's
awfullyˈɔːfəli
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
,
butbˈʌt
that's
impossibleɪmpˈɒsəbəl
.
KO
Whywˈaɪ
sosˈəʊ
?
NANKI-POO
To-daytəˈdeɪ
I
diedˈaɪ
.
KO
Whatwˈɒt
dodə
youjˈuː
meanmˈiːn
?
NANKI-POO
I
can't
livelɪv
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
Yum-Yum
.
Thisðˈɪs
afternoonˌɑːf.təˈnuːn
I
performpəfˈɔːm
theðə
Happyhˈæpi
Despatchdɪspˈætʃ
.
KO
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
—
pardonpˈɑːdən
memˈiː
—
I
can't
allowɐlˈaʊ
thatðˈæt
.
NANKI-POO
Whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
?
KO
Whywˈaɪ
,
hanghˈæŋ
itˈɪt
allˈɔːl
,
you're
underˈʌndɐ
contractˈkɒntɹækt
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
bybˈaɪ
theðə
handhˈænd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Publicpˈʌblɪk
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
inˈɪn
a
month's
timetˈaɪm
!
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
killkˈɪl
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
,
what's
totˈuː
becomebɪkˈʌm
ofˈɒv
memˈiː
?
Whywˈaɪ
,
I
shallʃˈæl
havehəv
totˈuː
bebˈiː
executedˈɛksɪkjˌuːtɪd
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
placeplˈeɪs
!
NANKI-POO
Itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
certainlysˈɜːtənli
seemsˈiːm
sosˈəʊ
!
Enter Pooh-Bah.
KO
Nownˈaʊ
thenðˈɛn
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Mayormˈeə
,
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
itˈɪt
?
POOH-BAH
Theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
andˈænd
hishˈɪz
suiteswiːt
areə(ɹ)
approachingɐpɹˈəʊtʃɪŋ
theðə
citysˈɪti
,
andˈænd
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
herehˈiə
inˈɪn
tentˈɛn
minutesmˈɪnɪts
.
KO
Theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
!
He's
comingkˈʌmɪŋ
totˈuː
seesˈiː
whetherwˈɛðɐ
hishˈɪz
ordersˈɔːdəz
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
carriedkˈæɹɪd
outˈaʊt
!
(
Totˈuː
Nanki-Poo
)
Nownˈaʊ
looklˈʊk
herehˈiə
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
—
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
gettingɡˈɛtɪŋ
serioussˈiəɹɪəs
—
a
bargain's
a
bargainbˈɑːɡɪn
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
reallyɹˈiəli
mustn't
frustratefɹʌstɹˈeɪt
theðə
endsˈɛndz
ofˈɒv
justicedʒˈʌstɪs
bybˈaɪ
committingkəmˈɪtɪŋ
suicidesˈuːɪsˌaɪd
.
Asəz
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
honourˈɒnɐ
andˈænd
a
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
,
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
boundbˈaʊnd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
ignominiouslyˌɪɡnəmˈɪnɪəsli
bybˈaɪ
theðə
handshˈændz
ofˈɒv
theðə
Publicpˈʌblɪk
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
.
NANKI-POO
Veryvˈɛɹi
wellwˈɛl
,
thenðˈɛn
—
beheadbɪhˈɛd
memˈiː
.
KO
Whatwˈɒt
,
nownˈaʊ
?
NANKI-POO
Certainlysˈɜːtənli
;
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
POOH-BAH
Choptʃˈɒp
itˈɪt
offˈɒf
!
Choptʃˈɒp
itˈɪt
offˈɒf
!
KO
Mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
sirsˈɜː
,
I
don't
goɡˈəʊ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
preparedpɹɪpˈeəd
totˈuː
executeˈɛksɪkjˌuːt
gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
atˈæt
a
moment's
noticenˈəʊtɪs
.
Whywˈaɪ
,
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
evenˈiːvən
killedkˈɪld
a
blue-bottle
!
POOH-BAH
Stillstˈɪl
,
asəz
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
——
KO
Mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
sirsˈɜː
,
asəz
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
,
I've
gotɡˈɒt
totˈuː
beheadbɪhˈɛd
himhˈɪm
inˈɪn
a
monthmˈʌnθ
.
I'm
notnˈɒt
readyɹˈɛdi
yetjˈɛt
.
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
howhˈaʊ
it's
donedˈʌn
.
I'm
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
taketˈeɪk
lessonslˈɛsənz
.
I
meanmˈiːn
totˈuː
beginbɪɡˈɪn
withwˈɪð
a
guineaɡˈɪni
pigpˈɪɡ
,
andˈænd
workwˈɜːk
mymˈaɪ
waywˈeɪ
throughθɹˈuː
theðə
animalˈænɪməl
kingdomkˈɪŋdəm
tilltˈɪl
I
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
a
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Trombonetɹɒmbˈəʊn
.
Whywˈaɪ
,
youjˈuː
don't
supposesʌpˈəʊz
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
a
humanehjuːmˈeɪn
manmˈæn
,
I'd
havehəv
acceptedɐksˈɛptɪd
theðə
postpˈəʊst
ofˈɒv
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Executionerˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃənɐ
ifˈɪf
I
hadn't
thoughtθˈɔːt
theðə
dutiesdjˈuːtɪz
werewˈɜː
purelypjˈɔːli
nominalnˈɒmɪnəl
?
I
can't
killkˈɪl
youjˈuː
—
I
can't
killkˈɪl
anythingˈɛnɪθˌɪŋ
!
I
can't
killkˈɪl
anybodyˈɛnɪbˌɒdi
!
(
Weepswˈiːps
)
NANKI-POO
Comekˈʌm
,
mymˈaɪ
poorpˈɔː
fellowfˈɛləʊ
,
wewˈiː
allˈɔːl
havehəv
unpleasantʌnplˈɛzənt
dutiesdjˈuːtɪz
totˈuː
dischargedɪsˈtʃɑːdʒ
atˈæt
timestˈaɪmz
;
afterˈɑːftɐ
allˈɔːl
,
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
itˈɪt
?
Ifˈɪf
I
don't
mindmˈaɪnd
,
whywˈaɪ
shouldʃˈʊd
youjˈuː
?
Rememberɹɪmˈɛmbɐ
,
soonersˈuːnɐ
orˈɔː
laterlˈeɪtɐ
itˈɪt
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
donedˈʌn
.
KO
(
springingspɹˈɪŋɪŋ
upˈʌp
suddenlysˈʌdənli
).
Mustmˈʌst
itˈɪt
?
I'm
notnˈɒt
sosˈəʊ
sureʃˈɔː
aboutɐbˈaʊt
thatðˈæt
!
NANKI-POO
Whatwˈɒt
dodə
youjˈuː
meanmˈiːn
?
KO
Whywˈaɪ
shouldʃˈʊd
I
killkˈɪl
youjˈuː
whenwˈɛn
makingmˈeɪkɪŋ
anˈɐn
affidavitˌæfɪdˈeɪvɪt
thatðˈæt
you've
beenbˈiːn
executedˈɛksɪkjˌuːtɪd
willwˈɪl
dodə
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
wellwˈɛl
?
Herehˈiə
areə(ɹ)
plentyplˈɛnti
ofˈɒv
witnesseswˈɪtnəsɪz
—
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Admiralˈædmɜːɹəl
,
Commander-in-Chief
,
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
ofˈɒv
Statestˈeɪt
forfˈɔː
theðə
Homehˈəʊm
Departmentdɪpˈɑːtmənt
,
Firstfˈɜːst
Lordlˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
theðə
Treasurytɹˈɛʒəɹi
,
andˈænd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Commissionerkəmˈɪʃənɐ
ofˈɒv
Policepəlˈiːs
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
wherewˈeə
areə(ɹ)
theyðˈeɪ
?
KO
Thereðˈeə
theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
.
They'll
allˈɔːl
swearswˈeə
totˈuː
itˈɪt
—
won't
youjˈuː
?
To Pooh-Bah
POOH-BAH
Aməm
I
totˈuː
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
thatðˈæt
allˈɔːl
ofˈɒv
usˈʌs
highhˈaɪ
Officersˈɒfɪsəz
ofˈɒv
Statestˈeɪt
areə(ɹ)
requiredɹɪkwˈaɪəd
totˈuː
perjurepˈɜːdʒjɔː
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
totˈuː
ensureɛnʃˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
safetysˈeɪfti
?
KO
Whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
!
You'll
bebˈiː
grosslyɡɹˈəʊsli
insultedɪnsˈʌltɪd
,
asəz
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
.
POOH-BAH
Willwˈɪl
theðə
insultɪnˈsʌlt
bebˈiː
cashkˈæʃ
downdˈaʊn
,
orˈɔː
atˈæt
a
datedˈeɪt
?
KO
Itˈɪt
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
a
ready-money
transactiontɹænsˈækʃən
.
(Aside) Well, it will be a useful discipline.
POOH-BAH
(
Aloudɐlˈaʊd
)
Veryvˈɛɹi
goodɡˈʊd
.
Choosetʃˈuːz
yourjˈɔː
fictionfˈɪkʃən
,
andˈænd
I'll
endorseɛndˈɔːs
itˈɪt
!
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Familyfˈæmɪli
Pridepɹˈaɪd
,
howhˈaʊ
dodə
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
thatðˈæt
,
mymˈaɪ
buckbˈʌk
?
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
I
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
thatðˈæt
lifelˈaɪf
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
Yum-Yum
——
KO
Ohˈəʊ
,
Yum-Yum
,
Yum-Yum
!
Botherbˈɒðɐ
Yum-Yum
!
Herehˈiə
,
Commissionairekəmˈɪʃənˈeə
(
totˈuː
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
),
goɡˈəʊ
andˈænd
fetchfˈɛtʃ
Yum-Yum
.
(Exit
KO
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
)
Taketˈeɪk
Yum-Yum
andˈænd
marrymˈæɹi
Yum-Yum
,
onlyˈəʊnli
goɡˈəʊ
awayɐwˈeɪ
andˈænd
nevernˈɛvɐ
comekˈʌm
backbˈæk
againɐɡˈɛn
.
(Enter Pooh-Bah with Yum-Yum) Here she is.
KO
Yum-Yum
,
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
busybˈɪzi
?
YUM-YUM
Notnˈɒt
particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
.
KO
You've
fivefˈaɪv
minutesmˈɪnɪts
totˈuː
sparespˈeə
?
YUM-YUM
Yesjˈɛs
.
KO
Thenðˈɛn
goɡˈəʊ
alongɐlˈɒŋ
withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
Graceɡɹˈeɪs
theðə
Archbishopˌɑːtʃbˈɪʃəp
ofˈɒv
Titipu
;
he'll
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
YUM-YUM
Butbˈʌt
ifˈɪf
I'm
totˈuː
bebˈiː
buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
?
KO
Nownˈaʊ
,
don't
askˈɑːsk
anyˈɛni
questionskwˈɛstʃənz
,
butbˈʌt
dodə
asəz
I
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
,
andˈænd
Nanki-Poo
willwˈɪl
explainɛksplˈeɪn
allˈɔːl
.
NANKI-POO
Butbˈʌt
onewˈɒn
momentmˈəʊmənt
——
KO
Notnˈɒt
forfˈɔː
worldswˈɜːldz
.
Herehˈiə
comeskˈʌmz
theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
,
nonəʊ
doubtdˈaʊt
totˈuː
ascertainˌæsətˈeɪn
whetherwˈɛðɐ
I've
obeyedəʊbˈeɪd
hishˈɪz
decreedɪkɹˈiː
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
findsfˈaɪndz
youjˈuː
aliveɐlˈaɪv
I
shallʃˈæl
havehəv
theðə
greatestɡɹˈeɪtəst
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
inˈɪn
persuadingpəswˈeɪdɪŋ
himhˈɪm
thatðˈæt
I've
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
youjˈuː
.
(Exeunt Nanki-Poo and Yum-Yum, followed by
KO
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
)
Closekləʊz
thingθˈɪŋ
thatðˈæt
,
forfˈɔː
herehˈiə
heˈhiː
comeskˈʌmz
!
[Exit Ko-Ko.
KO
Marchmˈɑːtʃ
.
—Enter procession, heralding Mikado, with Katisha.
KO
Entranceˈɛn.tɹəns
ofˈɒv
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
andˈænd
Katisha
.
("
Marchmˈɑːtʃ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Mikado's
troopstɹˈuːps
.
")
CHORUS
Miya
sama
,
miya
sama
,
Onˈɒn
n'm-ma
nonəʊ
mayemeɪ
nini
Pira-Pira
suru
nonəʊ
waˈdʌbəlˌjuː eɪ
Nannˈæn
gia
nanɑː
Toko
tonyare
tonyare
nanɑː
?
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
MIKADOmɪkˈɑːdəʊ
andˈænd
KATISHA
.
MIKADO
Fromfɹˈɒm
everyˈɛvɹi
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
manmˈæn
Obedienceəʊbˈiːdiəns
I
expectɛkspˈɛkt
;
I'm
theðə
Emperorˈɛmpəɹɐ
ofˈɒv
Japandʒəpˈæn
—
KATISHA
Andˈænd
I'm
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
He'll
marrymˈæɹi
hishˈɪz
sonsˈʌn
He's only got one
KATISHA
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
MIKADO
Mymˈaɪ
moralsmˈɒɹəlz
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
declareddɪklˈeəd
Particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
correctkəɹˈɛkt
;
KATISHA
Butbˈʌt
they're
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
atˈæt
allˈɔːl
,
comparedkəmpˈeəd
Withwˈɪð
thoseðˈəʊz
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
Bowbəʊ
—
Bowbəʊ
—
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
ALL
Bowbəʊ
—
Bowbəʊ
—
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
.
MIKADO
Inˈɪn
a
fatherlyfˈɑːðəli
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
waywˈeɪ
I
governɡˈʌvən
eachˈiːtʃ
tribetɹˈaɪb
andˈænd
sectsˈɛkt
,
Allˈɔːl
cheerfullytʃˈiəfəli
ownˈəʊn
mymˈaɪ
swayswˈeɪ
—
KATISHA
Exceptɛksˈɛpt
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
Asəz
toughtˈʌf
asəz
a
bonebˈəʊn
,
Withwˈɪð
a
willwˈɪl
ofˈɒv
herhˈɜː
ownˈəʊn
,
Isˈɪz
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
MIKADO
Mymˈaɪ
naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
isˈɪz
lovelˈʌv
andˈænd
lightlˈaɪt
—
Mymˈaɪ
freedomfɹˈiːdəm
fromfɹˈɒm
allˈɔːl
defectˈdiːfɛkt
—
KATISHA
Isˈɪz
insignificantˌɪnsɪɡnˈɪfɪkənt
quitekwaɪt
,
Comparedkəmpˈeəd
withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
Bowbəʊ
—
Bowbəʊ
—
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
ALL
Bowbəʊ
—
Bowbəʊ
—
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electɪlˈɛkt
!
SONGsˈɒŋ
—
MIKADOmɪkˈɑːdəʊ
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
.
A
moremˈɔː
humanehjuːmˈeɪn
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
nevernˈɛvɐ
Diddˈɪd
inˈɪn
Japandʒəpˈæn
existɛɡzˈɪst
,
Totˈuː
nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
secondˈsɛk.ənd
,
I'm
certainlysˈɜːtənli
reckonedɹˈɛkənd
A
truetɹˈuː
philanthropistfɪlˈænθɹəpˌɪst
.
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
mymˈaɪ
veryvˈɛɹi
humanehjuːmˈeɪn
endeavourɛndˈɛvɐ
Totˈuː
makemˈeɪk
,
totˈuː
somesˈʌm
extentɛkstˈɛnt
,
Eachˈiːtʃ
evilˈiːvəl
liverlˈɪvɐ
A
runningɹˈʌnɪŋ
riverˈɹɪvɚ
Ofˈɒv
harmlesshˈɑːmləs
merrimentmˈɛɹɪmənt
.
Mymˈaɪ
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
allˈɔːl
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
I
shallʃˈæl
achieveɐtʃˈiːv
inˈɪn
timetˈaɪm
—
Totˈuː
letlˈɛt
theðə
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
fitfˈɪt
theðə
crimekɹˈaɪm
—
Theðə
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
fitfˈɪt
theðə
crimekɹˈaɪm
;
Andˈænd
makemˈeɪk
eachˈiːtʃ
prisonerpɹˈɪzənɐ
pentpˈɛnt
Unwillinglyʌnwˈɪlɪŋli
representˌɹɛp.ɹɪˈzɛnt
A
sourcesˈɔːs
ofˈɒv
innocentˈɪnəsənt
merrimentmˈɛɹɪmənt
!
Ofˈɒv
innocentˈɪnəsənt
merrimentmˈɛɹɪmənt
!
Allˈɔːl
prosyˈpɹəʊzi
dulldˈʌl
societysəsˈaɪəti
sinnerssˈɪnəz
,
Whohˈuː
chattertʃˈætɐ
andˈænd
bleatblˈiːt
andˈænd
borebˈɔː
,
Areə(ɹ)
sentsˈɛnt
totˈuː
hearhˈiə
sermonssˈɜːmənz
Fromfɹˈɒm
mysticalmˈɪstɪkəl
Germansˈd͡ʒɜːmənz
Whohˈuː
preachpɹˈiːtʃ
fromfɹˈɒm
tentˈɛn
tilltˈɪl
fourfˈɔː
.
Theðə
amateurˈæmətɐ
tenortˈɛnɐ
,
whosehˈuːz
vocalvˈəʊkəl
villainies
Allˈɔːl
desiredɪzˈaɪə
totˈuː
shirkʃɜːk
,
Shallʃˈæl
,
duringdjˈɔːɹɪŋ
off-hours
,
Exhibitɛɡzˈɪbɪt
hishˈɪz
powerspˈaʊəz
Totˈuː
Madamemˈædəm
Tussaud's
waxworkwˈækswɜːk
.
Theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
whohˈuː
dyesdˈaɪz
a
chemicalkˈɛmɪkəl
yellowjˈɛləʊ
Orˈɔː
stainsstˈeɪnz
herhˈɜː
greyɡɹˈeɪ
hairhˈeə
pucepjˈuːs
,
Orˈɔː
pinchespˈɪntʃɪz
herhˈɜː
figurefˈɪɡɐ
,
Isˈɪz
paintedpˈeɪntɪd
withwˈɪð
vigourvˈɪɡɐ
Withwˈɪð
permanentpˈɜːmənənt
walnutwˈɒlnʌt
juicedʒˈuːs
.
Theðə
idiotˈɪdɪət
whohˈuː
,
inˈɪn
railwayɹˈeɪlweɪ
carriageskˈæɹɪdʒɪz
,
Scribblesskɹˈɪbəlz
onˈɒn
window-panes
,
Wewˈiː
onlyˈəʊnli
suffersˈʌfɐ
Totˈuː
rideɹˈaɪd
onˈɒn
a
bufferbˈʌfɐ
Inˈɪn
Parliamentarypˌɑːləmˈɛntəɹi
trainstɹˈeɪnz
.
Mymˈaɪ
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
allˈɔːl
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
CHORUS
Hishˈɪz
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
allˈɔːl
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Theðə
advertisingˈædvətˌaɪzɪŋ
quackkwˈæk
whohˈuː
weariesˈwɪə̯ɹi
Withwˈɪð
talesteɪlz
ofˈɒv
countlesskˈaʊntləs
cureskjˈɔːz
,
Hishˈɪz
teethtˈiːθ
,
I've
enactedɛnˈæktɪd
,
Shallʃˈæl
allˈɔːl
bebˈiː
extractedɛkstɹˈæktɪd
Bybˈaɪ
terrifiedtˈɛɹɪfˌaɪd
amateursˈæmətəz
.
Theðə
music-hall
singerˈsɪŋə
attendsɐtˈɛndz
a
seriessˈiəɹiz
Ofˈɒv
massesmˈæsɪz
andˈænd
fuguesfjˈuːɡz
andˈænd
"
opsˈɒps
"
Bybˈaɪ
Bachbˈɑːx
,
interwovenˌɪntəwˈəʊvən
Withwˈɪð
Spohr
andˈænd
Beethovenˈbeɪˌtəʊvən
,
Atˈæt
classicalklˈæsɪkəl
Mondayˈmʌn.deɪ
Popspˈɒps
.
Theðə
billiardbˈɪlɪəd
sharpʃˈɑːp
whohˈuː
anyˈɛni
onewˈɒn
catcheskˈætʃɪz
,
Hishˈɪz
doom's
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
hardhˈɑːd
—
He's
mademˈeɪd
totˈuː
dwelldwˈɛl
—
Inˈɪn
a
dungeondˈʌndʒən
cellsˈɛl
Onˈɒn
a
spotspˈɒt
that's
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
barredbˈɑːd
.
Andˈænd
thereðˈeə
heˈhiː
playsplˈeɪz
extravagantɛkstɹˈævəɡənt
matchesmˈætʃɪz
Inˈɪn
fitless
finger-stalls
Onˈɒn
a
clothklˈɒθ
untrueʌntɹˈuː
Withwˈɪð
a
twistedtwˈɪstɪd
cuekjˈuː
Andˈænd
ellipticalɪlˈɪptɪkəl
billiardbˈɪlɪəd
ballsbˈɔːlz
!
Mymˈaɪ
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
allˈɔːl
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Hishˈɪz
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
allˈɔːl
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Enter Pooh-Bah, Ko-Ko, and Pitti-Sing.
All kneel
Pooh-Bah hands a paper to Ko-Ko
KO
I
aməm
honouredˈɒnəd
inˈɪn
beingbˈiːɪŋ
permittedpəmˈɪtɪd
totˈuː
welcomewˈɛlkʌm
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
.
I
guessɡˈɛs
theðə
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
Majesty's
visitvˈɪzɪt
—
yourjˈɔː
wisheswˈɪʃɪz
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
attendedɐtˈɛndɪd
totˈuː
.
Theðə
executionˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃən
hashˈæz
takentˈeɪkən
placeplˈeɪs
.
MIKADO
Ohˈəʊ
,
you've
hadhˈæd
anˈɐn
executionˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃən
,
havehəv
youjˈuː
?
KO
Yesjˈɛs
.
Theðə
Coronerkˈɒɹənɐ
hashˈæz
justdʒˈʌst
handedhˈændɪd
memˈiː
hishˈɪz
certificatesəˈtɪf.ɪ.kət
.
POOH-BAH
I
aməm
theðə
Coronerkˈɒɹənɐ
.
(
Ko-Ko
handshˈændz
certificatesəˈtɪf.ɪ.kət
totˈuː
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
)
MIKADO
Andˈænd
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
theðə
certificatesəˈtɪf.ɪ.kət
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
deathdˈɛθ
.
Reads
MIKADO
"
Atˈæt
Titipu
,
inˈɪn
theðə
presencepɹˈɛzəns
ofˈɒv
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Chieftʃˈiːf
Justicedʒˈʌstɪs
,
Attorney-General
,
Secretarysˈɛkɹətɹˌi
ofˈɒv
Statestˈeɪt
forfˈɔː
theðə
Homehˈəʊm
Departmentdɪpˈɑːtmənt
,
Lordlˈɔːd
Mayormˈeə
,
andˈænd
Groomɡɹˈuːm
ofˈɒv
theðə
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Floorflˈɔː
Frontfɹˈʌnt
——"
POOH-BAH
Theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
allˈɔːl
presentˈpɹɛzənt
,
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
.
I
countedkˈaʊntɪd
themðˈɛm
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
.
MIKADO
Veryvˈɛɹi
goodɡˈʊd
househaʊs
.
I
wishwˈɪʃ
I'd
beenbˈiːn
inˈɪn
timetˈaɪm
forfˈɔː
theðə
performancepəfˈɔːməns
.
KO
A
toughtˈʌf
fellowfˈɛləʊ
heˈhiː
waswˈɒz
,
tootˈuː
—
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
giganticdʒaɪɡˈæntɪk
strengthstɹˈɛŋθ
.
Hishˈɪz
strugglesstɹˈʌɡəlz
werewˈɜː
terrifictəɹˈɪfɪk
.
Itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
a
remarkableɹɪmˈɑːkəbəl
scenesˈiːn
.
MIKADO
Describedɪskɹˈaɪb
itˈɪt
.
TRIOtɹˈiːəʊ
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
.
KO-KO
,
PITTI-SING
,
POOH-BAHˈpuːbɑː
andˈænd
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
.
KO
Theðə
criminalkɹˈɪmɪnəl
criedkɹˈaɪd
,
asəz
heˈhiː
droppeddɹˈɒpt
himhˈɪm
downdˈaʊn
,
Inˈɪn
a
statestˈeɪt
ofˈɒv
wildwˈaɪld
alarmɐlˈɑːm
—
Withwˈɪð
a
frightfulfɹˈaɪtfəl
,
franticfɹˈɑːntɪk
,
fearfulfˈiəfəl
frownfɹˈaʊn
,
I
baredbˈeəd
mymˈaɪ
bigbˈɪɡ
rightɹˈaɪt
armˈɑːm
.
I
seizedsˈiːzd
himhˈɪm
bybˈaɪ
hishˈɪz
littlelˈɪtəl
pig-tailˈpɪɡ.teɪl
,
Andˈænd
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
kneesnˈiːz
fellfˈɛl
heˈhiː
,
Asəz
heˈhiː
squirmedskwˈɜːmd
andˈænd
struggledstɹˈʌɡəld
,
Andˈænd
gurgledɡˈɜːɡəld
andˈænd
guggledˈɡʌɡəl
,
I
drewdɹˈuː
mymˈaɪ
snickersneeˌsnɪk.əˈsniː
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
shallʃˈæl
I
Forgetfəɡˈɛt
theðə
crykɹˈaɪ
,
Orˈɔː
theðə
shriekʃɹˈiːk
thatðˈæt
shriekedʃɹˈiːkt
heˈhiː
,
Asəz
I
gnashednˈæʃt
mymˈaɪ
teethtˈiːθ
,
Whenwˈɛn
fromfɹˈɒm
itsˈɪts
sheathʃˈiːθ
I
drewdɹˈuː
mymˈaɪ
snickersneeˌsnɪk.əˈsniː
!
CHORUS
Wewˈiː
knownˈəʊ
himhˈɪm
wellwˈɛl
,
Heˈhiː
cannotˈkænɒt
telltˈɛl
Untrueʌntɹˈuː
orˈɔː
groundlessɡɹˈaʊndləs
talesteɪlz
—
Heˈhiː
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
triestɹˈaɪz
Totˈuː
utterˈʌtɐ
lieslˈaɪz
,
Andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
timetˈaɪm
heˈhiː
failsfˈeɪlz
.
PITTI-SING
Heˈhiː
shiveredʃˈɪvəd
andˈænd
shookʃˈʊk
asəz
heˈhiː
gaveɡˈeɪv
theðə
signsˈaɪn
Forfˈɔː
theðə
strokestɹˈəʊk
heˈhiː
didn't
deservedɪzˈɜːv
;
Whenwˈɛn
allˈɔːl
ofˈɒv
a
suddensˈʌdən
hishˈɪz
eyeˈaɪ
metmˈɛt
minemˈaɪn
,
Andˈænd
itˈɪt
seemedsˈiːmd
totˈuː
bracebɹˈeɪs
hishˈɪz
nervenˈɜːv
;
Forfˈɔː
heˈhiː
noddednˈɒdɪd
hishˈɪz
headhˈɛd
andˈænd
kissedkˈɪst
hishˈɪz
handhˈænd
,
Andˈænd
heˈhiː
whistledwˈɪsəld
anˈɐn
airˈeə
,
diddˈɪd
heˈhiː
,
Asəz
theðə
sabresˈeɪbɐ
truetɹˈuː
Cutkˈʌt
cleanlyˈklɛnli
throughθɹˈuː
Hishˈɪz
cervicalsˈɜːvɪkəl
vertebraevˈɜːtɪbɹˌiː
!
Whenwˈɛn
a
man's
afraidɐfɹˈeɪd
,
A
beautifulbjˈuːtɪfəl
maidmˈeɪd
Isˈɪz
a
cheeringtʃˈiəɹɪŋ
sightsˈaɪt
totˈuː
seesˈiː
;
Andˈænd
it's
ohˈəʊ
,
I'm
gladɡlˈæd
Thatðˈæt
momentmˈəʊmənt
sadsˈæd
Waswˈɒz
soothedsˈuːðd
bybˈaɪ
sightsˈaɪt
ofˈɒv
memˈiː
!
CHORUS
Herhˈɜː
terribletˈɛɹəbəl
taletˈeɪl
Youjˈuː
can't
assailɐsˈeɪl
,
Withwˈɪð
truthtɹˈuːθ
itˈɪt
quitekwaɪt
agreesɐɡɹˈiːz
:
Herhˈɜː
tastetˈeɪst
exactɛɡzˈækt
Forfˈɔː
faultlessfˈɒltləs
factfˈækt
Amountsɐmˈaʊnts
totˈuː
a
diseasedɪzˈiːz
.
POOH-BAH
Nownˈaʊ
thoughðˈəʊ
you'd
havehəv
saidsˈɛd
thatðˈæt
headhˈɛd
waswˈɒz
deaddˈɛd
(
Forfˈɔː
itsˈɪts
ownerˈəʊnɐ
deaddˈɛd
waswˈɒz
heˈhiː
),
Itˈɪt
stoodstˈʊd
onˈɒn
itsˈɪts
necknˈɛk
,
withwˈɪð
a
smilesmˈaɪl
well-bred
,
Andˈænd
bowedbaʊd
threeθɹˈiː
timestˈaɪmz
totˈuː
memˈiː
!
Itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
impudentɪmpjˈuːdənt
off-handˌɔfˈhænd
nodsnˈɒdz
,
Butbˈʌt
asəz
humblehˈʌmbəl
asəz
couldkˈʊd
bebˈiː
;
Forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
clearlyklˈiəli
knewnjˈuː
Theðə
deferencedˈɛfɹəns
duedjˈuː
Totˈuː
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
pedigreepˈɛdɪɡɹˌiː
!
Andˈænd
it's
ohˈəʊ
,
I
vowvˈaʊ
,
Thisðˈɪs
deathlydˈɛθli
bowbəʊ
Waswˈɒz
a
touchingtˈʌtʃɪŋ
sightsˈaɪt
totˈuː
seesˈiː
;
Thoughðˈəʊ
trunkless
,
yetjˈɛt
Itˈɪt
couldn't
forgetfəɡˈɛt
Theðə
deferencedˈɛfɹəns
duedjˈuː
totˈuː
memˈiː
!
CHORUS
Thisðˈɪs
haughtyhˈɔːti
youthjˈuːθ
,
Heˈhiː
speaksspˈiːks
theðə
truthtɹˈuːθ
Wheneverwɛnˈɛvɐ
heˈhiː
findsfˈaɪndz
itˈɪt
payspˈeɪz
:
Andˈænd
inˈɪn
thisðˈɪs
casekˈeɪs
Itˈɪt
allˈɔːl
tooktˈʊk
placeplˈeɪs
Exactlyɛɡzˈæktli
asəz
heˈhiː
sayssˈɛz
!
[Exeunt
CHORUS
Choruskˈɔːɹəs
.
MIKADO
Allˈɔːl
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
veryvˈɛɹi
interestingˈɪntɹəstɪŋ
,
andˈænd
I
shouldʃˈʊd
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
havehəv
seensˈiːn
itˈɪt
.
Butbˈʌt
wewˈiː
camekˈeɪm
aboutɐbˈaʊt
a
totallytˈəʊtəli
differentdˈɪfɹənt
mattermˈætɐ
.
A
yearjˈiə
agoɐɡˈəʊ
mymˈaɪ
sonsˈʌn
,
theðə
heirˈeə
totˈuː
theðə
throneθɹˈəʊn
ofˈɒv
Japandʒəpˈæn
,
boltedbˈəʊltɪd
fromfɹˈɒm
ourˈaʊə
Imperialɪmpˈiəɹɪəl
Courtkˈɔːt
.
KO
Indeedˌɪndˈiːd
!
Hadhˈæd
heˈhiː
anyˈɛni
reasonɹˈiːzən
totˈuː
bebˈiː
dissatisfieddɪsˈætɪsfˌaɪd
withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
positionpəzˈɪʃən
?
KATISHA
Nonenʌn
whateverwɒtˈɛvɐ
.
Onˈɒn
theðə
contraryˈkɒntɹəɹi
,
I
waswˈɒz
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
himhˈɪm
—
yetjˈɛt
heˈhiː
fledflˈɛd
!
POOH-BAH
I
aməm
surprisedsəpɹˈaɪzd
thatðˈæt
heˈhiː
shouldʃˈʊd
havehəv
fledflˈɛd
fromfɹˈɒm
onewˈɒn
sosˈəʊ
lovelylˈʌvli
!
KATISHA
That's
notnˈɒt
truetɹˈuː
.
POOH-BAH
Nonəʊ
!
KATISHA
Youjˈuː
holdhˈəʊld
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
notnˈɒt
beautifulbjˈuːtɪfəl
becausebɪkˈʌz
mymˈaɪ
facefˈeɪs
isˈɪz
plainplˈeɪn
.
Butbˈʌt
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
;
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
stillstˈɪl
unenlightenedˌʌnɛnlˈaɪtənd
.
Learnlˈɜːn
,
thenðˈɛn
,
thatðˈæt
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
inˈɪn
theðə
facefˈeɪs
aloneɐlˈəʊn
thatðˈæt
beautybjˈuːti
isˈɪz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
soughtsˈɔːt
.
Mymˈaɪ
facefˈeɪs
isˈɪz
unattractiveʌnɐtɹˈæktɪv
!
POOH-BAH
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
.
KATISHA
Butbˈʌt
I
havehəv
a
leftlˈɛft
shoulder-blade
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
a
miraclemˈɪɹəkəl
ofˈɒv
lovelinesslˈʌvlinəs
.
Peoplepˈiːpəl
comekˈʌm
milesmˈaɪlz
totˈuː
seesˈiː
itˈɪt
.
Mymˈaɪ
rightɹˈaɪt
elbowˈɛlbəʊ
hashˈæz
a
fascinationfˌæsɪnˈeɪʃən
thatðˈæt
fewfjˈuː
cankˈæn
resistɹɪsˈɪst
.
POOH-BAH
Allowɐlˈaʊ
memˈiː
!
KATISHA
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
onˈɒn
viewvjˈuː
Tuesdaysˈtjuːz.deɪ
andˈænd
Fridaysˈfɹaɪ.deɪ
,
onˈɒn
presentationpɹˌɛzəntˈeɪʃən
ofˈɒv
visitingvˈɪzɪtɪŋ
cardkˈɑːd
.
Asəz
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
circulationsˌɜːkjʊlˈeɪʃən
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
theðə
largestlˈɑːdʒəst
inˈɪn
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
.
KO
Andˈænd
yetjˈɛt
heˈhiː
fledflˈɛd
!
MIKADO
Andˈænd
isˈɪz
nownˈaʊ
masqueradingmˈæskwəɹˌeɪdɪŋ
inˈɪn
thisðˈɪs
towntˈaʊn
,
disguiseddɪsɡˈaɪzd
asəz
a
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Trombonetɹɒmbˈəʊn
.
POOH-BAH
,
andˈænd
PITTI
.
A
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Trombonetɹɒmbˈəʊn
!
MIKADO
Yesjˈɛs
;
wouldwˈʊd
itˈɪt
bebˈiː
troublingtɹˈʌblɪŋ
youjˈuː
tootˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
ifˈɪf
I
askedˈɑːskt
youjˈuː
totˈuː
producepɹəˈd͡ʒuːs
himhˈɪm
?
Heˈhiː
goesɡˈəʊz
bybˈaɪ
theðə
namenˈeɪm
ofˈɒv
——
KO
It's
quitekwaɪt
easyˈiːzi
.
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
,
it's
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
difficultdˈɪfɪkəlt
.
Inˈɪn
pointpˈɔɪnt
ofˈɒv
factfˈækt
,
he's
goneɡˈɒn
abroadɐbɹˈɔːd
!
MIKADO
Goneɡˈɒn
abroadɐbɹˈɔːd
!
Hishˈɪz
addressəˈdɹɛs
.
KO
Knightsbridgeˈnaɪts.bɹɪd͡ʒ
!
KATISHA
(
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
readingˈɹiːdɪŋ
certificatesəˈtɪf.ɪ.kət
ofˈɒv
deathdˈɛθ
).
Hahˈɑː
!
MIKADO
What's
theðə
mattermˈætɐ
?
KATISHA
Seesˈiː
herehˈiə
—
hishˈɪz
namenˈeɪm
—
Nanki-Poo
—
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
thisðˈɪs
morningmˈɔːnɪŋ
.
Ohˈəʊ
,
wherewˈeə
shallʃˈæl
I
findfˈaɪnd
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
?
Wherewˈeə
shallʃˈæl
I
findfˈaɪnd
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
?
[Ko-Ko, Pooh-Bah, and Pitti-Sing fall on
KATISHA
theirðˈeə
kneesnˈiːz
.
MIKADO
(
lookinglˈʊkɪŋ
atˈæt
paperpˈeɪpɐ
).
Deardˈiə
,
deardˈiə
,
deardˈiə
!
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
veryvˈɛɹi
tiresometˈaɪəsʌm
.
(
Totˈuː
Ko-Ko
)
Mymˈaɪ
poorpˈɔː
fellowfˈɛləʊ
,
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
anxietyæŋzˈaɪəti
totˈuː
carrykˈæɹi
outˈaʊt
mymˈaɪ
wisheswˈɪʃɪz
youjˈuː
havehəv
beheadedbɪhˈɛdɪd
theðə
heirˈeə
totˈuː
theðə
throneθɹˈəʊn
ofˈɒv
Japandʒəpˈæn
!
KO
I
begbˈɛɡ
totˈuː
offerˈɒfɐ
anˈɐn
unqualifiedʌnkwˈɒlɪfˌaɪd
apologyɐpˈɒlədʒi
.
POOH-BAH
I
desiredɪzˈaɪə
totˈuː
associateəˈsəʊʃieɪt
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
withwˈɪð
thatðˈæt
expressionɛkspɹˈɛʃən
ofˈɒv
regretɹɪɡɹˈɛt
.
PITTI-SING
Wewˈiː
reallyɹˈiəli
hadn't
theðə
leastlˈiːst
notionnˈəʊʃən
—
MIKADO
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
youjˈuː
hadn't
.
Howhˈaʊ
couldkˈʊd
youjˈuː
?
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
,
mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
fellowfˈɛləʊ
,
don't
distressdɪstɹˈɛs
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
—
itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
nonəʊ
faultfˈɒlt
ofˈɒv
yoursjˈɔːz
.
Ifˈɪf
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
exaltedɛɡzˈɒltɪd
rankɹˈæŋk
choosestʃˈuːzɪz
totˈuː
disguisedɪsɡˈaɪz
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
asəz
a
Secondˈsɛk.ənd
Trombone, he must take the consequences.
MIKADO
Itˈɪt
reallyɹˈiəli
distressesdɪstɹˈɛsɪz
memˈiː
totˈuː
seesˈiː
youjˈuː
taketˈeɪk
onˈɒn
sosˈəʊ
.
I've
nonəʊ
doubtdˈaʊt
heˈhiː
thoroughlyθˈʌɹəli
deserveddɪzˈɜːvd
allˈɔːl
heˈhiː
gotɡˈɒt
.
They rise
KO
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
infinitelyˈɪnfɪnətli
obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
——
PITTI-SING
Muchmˈʌtʃ
obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
,
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
.
POOH-BAH
Veryvˈɛɹi
muchmˈʌtʃ
obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
,
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
.
MIKADO
Obligedəblˈaɪdʒd
?
notnˈɒt
a
bitbˈɪt
.
Don't
mentionmˈɛnʃən
itˈɪt
.
Howhˈaʊ
couldkˈʊd
youjˈuː
telltˈɛl
?
POOH-BAH
Nonəʊ
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
wewˈiː
couldn't
telltˈɛl
whohˈuː
theðə
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
reallyɹˈiəli
waswˈɒz
.
PITTI-SING
Itˈɪt
wasn't
writtenɹˈɪtən
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
foreheadfˈɔːhɛd
,
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
.
KO
Itˈɪt
mightmˈaɪt
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
pocket-handkerchief
,
butbˈʌt
Japaneseˌd͡ʒæpəˈniːz
don't
usejuːs
pocket-handkerchiefs
!
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
MIKADO
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
(
Totˈuː
Katisha
)
I
forgetfəɡˈɛt
theðə
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
forfˈɔː
compassingˈkʌmpəs
theðə
deathdˈɛθ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Heirˈeə
Apparentɐpˈæɹənt
.
KO
,
POOHpˈuː
,
andˈænd
PITTI
.
Punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
.
(
Theyðˈeɪ
dropdɹˈɒp
downdˈaʊn
onˈɒn
theirðˈeə
kneesnˈiːz
againɐɡˈɛn
)
MIKADO
Yesjˈɛs
.
Somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
lingeringlˈɪŋɡəɹɪŋ
,
withwˈɪð
boilingbˈɔɪlɪŋ
oilˈɔɪl
inˈɪn
itˈɪt
,
I
fancyfˈænsi
.
Something of that sort.
MIKADO
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
boilingbˈɔɪlɪŋ
oilˈɔɪl
occursəkˈɜːz
inˈɪn
itˈɪt
,
butbˈʌt
I'm
notnˈɒt
sureʃˈɔː
.
I
knownˈəʊ
it's
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
humoroushjˈuːməɹəs
,
butbˈʌt
lingeringlˈɪŋɡəɹɪŋ
,
withwˈɪð
eitherˈaɪðɐ
boilingbˈɔɪlɪŋ
oilˈɔɪl
orˈɔː
meltedmˈɛltɪd
leadlɛd
.
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
,
don't
fretfɹˈɛt
—
I'm
notnˈɒt
a
bitbˈɪt
angryˈæŋɡɹi
.
KO
(
inˈɪn
abjectˈæbd͡ʒɛkt
terrortˈɛɹɐ
).
Ifˈɪf
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
willwˈɪl
acceptɐksˈɛpt
ourˈaʊə
assuranceəʃjˈɔːɹəns
,
wewˈiː
hadhˈæd
nonəʊ
ideaaɪdˈiə
——
MIKADO
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
——
PITTI-SING
I
knewnjˈuː
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
itˈɪt
.
POOH-BAH
I
wasn't
thereðˈeə
.
MIKADO
That's
theðə
patheticpɐθˈɛtɪk
partpˈɑːt
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
.
Unfortunatelyʌnfˈɔːtʃənətli
,
theðə
foolfˈuːl
ofˈɒv
anˈɐn
Actˈækt
sayssˈɛz
"
compassingˈkʌmpəs
theðə
deathdˈɛθ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Heirˈeə
Apparentɐpˈæɹənt
.
"
There's
notnˈɒt
a
wordwˈɜːd
aboutɐbˈaʊt
a
mistakemɪstˈeɪk
——
PITTI-SING
,
andˈænd
POOHpˈuː
.
Nonəʊ
!
MIKADO
Orˈɔː
notnˈɒt
knowingnˈəʊɪŋ
——
KO
Nonəʊ
!
MIKADO
Orˈɔː
havinghˈævɪŋ
nonəʊ
notionnˈəʊʃən
——
PITTI-SING
Nonəʊ
!
MIKADO
Orˈɔː
notnˈɒt
beingbˈiːɪŋ
thereðˈeə
——
POOH-BAH
Nonəʊ
!
MIKADO
Thereðˈeə
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
,
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
—-
PITTI-SING
,
andˈænd
POOHpˈuː
.
Yesjˈɛs
!
MIKADO
Butbˈʌt
thereðˈeə
isn't
.
PITTI-SING
,
andˈænd
POOHpˈuː
.
Ohˈəʊ
!
MIKADO
That's
theðə
slovenlyslˈʌvənli
waywˈeɪ
inˈɪn
whichwˈɪtʃ
theseðˈiːz
Actsˈækts
areə(ɹ)
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
drawndɹˈɔːn
.
Howeverhaʊˈɛvɐ
,
cheertʃˈiə
upˈʌp
,
it'll
bebˈiː
allˈɔːl
rightɹˈaɪt
.
I'll
havehəv
itˈɪt
alteredˈɒltəd
nextnˈɛkst
sessionsˈɛʃən
.
Nownˈaʊ
,
let's
seesˈiː
aboutɐbˈaʊt
yourjˈɔː
executionˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃən
—
willwˈɪl
afterˈɑːftɐ
luncheonlˈʌntʃən
suitsˈuːt
youjˈuː
?
Cankˈæn
youjˈuː
waitwˈeɪt
tilltˈɪl
thenðˈɛn
?
PITTI-SING
,
andˈænd
POOHpˈuː
.
Ohˈəʊ
,
yesjˈɛs
—
wewˈiː
cankˈæn
waitwˈeɪt
tilltˈɪl
thenðˈɛn
!
MIKADO
Thenðˈɛn
we'll
makemˈeɪk
itˈɪt
afterˈɑːftɐ
luncheonlˈʌntʃən
.
POOH-BAH
I
don't
wantwˈɒnt
anyˈɛni
lunchlˈʌntʃ
.
MIKADO
I'm
reallyɹˈiəli
veryvˈɛɹi
sorrysˈɒɹi
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
allˈɔːl
,
butbˈʌt
it's
anˈɐn
unjustʌndʒˈʌst
worldwˈɜːld
,
andˈænd
virtuevˈɜːtʃuː
isˈɪz
triumphanttɹaɪˈʌmfənt
onlyˈəʊnli
inˈɪn
theatricalθiːˈætɹɪkəl
performancespəfˈɔːmənsɪz
.
GLEE
PITTI-SING
,
KATISHA
,
KO-KO
,
POOH-BAHˈpuːbɑː
,
andˈænd
MIKADOmɪkˈɑːdəʊ
,
MIKADO
Seesˈiː
howhˈaʊ
theðə
Fatesfˈeɪts
theirðˈeə
giftsɡˈɪfts
allotɐlˈɒt
,
Forfˈɔː
A
isˈɪz
happyhˈæpi
—
B
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
.
Yetjˈɛt
B
isˈɪz
worthywˈɜːði
,
I
daredˈeə
saysˈeɪ
,
Ofˈɒv
moremˈɔː
prosperitypɹəspˈɛɹɪti
thanðˈɐn
A
!
POOH-BAH
,
andˈænd
PITTI
.
Isˈɪz
B
moremˈɔː
worthywˈɜːði
?
KATISHA
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
He's
worthwˈɜːθ
a
greatɡɹˈeɪt
dealdˈiːl
moremˈɔː
thanðˈɐn
A
.
ENSEMBLE:
Yetjˈɛt
A
isˈɪz
happyhˈæpi
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
sosˈəʊ
happyhˈæpi
!
Laughinglˈɑːfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Chaffingtʃˈæfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Nectarnˈɛktɐ
quaffingkwˈɒfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Everˈɛvɐ
joyousdʒˈɔɪəs
,
everˈɛvɐ
gayɡˈeɪ
,
Happyhˈæpi
,
undeservingˌʌndɪzˈɜːvɪŋ
A
!
POOH-BAH
,
andˈænd
PITTI
.
Ifˈɪf
I
werewˈɜː
Fortunefˈɔːtʃuːn
—
whichwˈɪtʃ
I'm
notnˈɒt
—
B
shouldʃˈʊd
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
A's
happyhˈæpi
lotlˈɒt
,
Andˈænd
A
shouldʃˈʊd
diedˈaɪ
inˈɪn
miserie
—
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
,
assumingɐsˈuːmɪŋ
I
aməm
B
.
MIKADO
andˈænd
KATkˈæt
.
Butbˈʌt
shouldʃˈʊd
A
perishpˈɛɹɪʃ
?
POOH-BAH
,
andˈænd
PITTI
.
Thatðˈæt
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
(
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
,
assumingɐsˈuːmɪŋ
I
aməm
B
).
B
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
happyhˈæpi
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
sosˈəʊ
happyhˈæpi
!
Laughinglˈɑːfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Chaffingtʃˈæfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Nectarnˈɛktɐ
quaffingkwˈɒfɪŋ
,
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Butbˈʌt
condemnedkəndˈɛmd
totˈuː
diedˈaɪ
isˈɪz
heˈhiː
,
Wretchedɹˈɛtʃɪd
meritoriousmˌɛɹɪtˈɔːɹɪəs
B
!
[Exeunt Mikado and
POOH-BAH
Katisha
.
KO
Wellwˈɛl
,
a
nicenaɪs
messmˈɛs
you've
gotɡˈɒt
usˈʌs
intoˈɪntʊ
,
withwˈɪð
yourjˈɔː
noddingnˈɒdɪŋ
headhˈɛd
andˈænd
theðə
deferencedˈɛfɹəns
duedjˈuː
totˈuː
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
pedigreepˈɛdɪɡɹˌiː
!
POOH-BAH
Merelymˈiəli
corroborativekəɹˈɒbɹətˌɪv
detailˈdiː.teɪl
,
intendedɪntˈɛndɪd
totˈuː
giveɡˈɪv
artisticɑːtˈɪstɪk
verisimilitudevˈɛɹɪsˌɪmɪlˌɪtjuːd
totˈuː
anˈɐn
otherwiseˈʌðəwˌaɪz
baldbˈɔːld
andˈænd
unconvincingʌnkənvˈɪnsɪŋ
narrativenˈæɹətˌɪv
.
PITTI-SING
Corroborativekəɹˈɒbɹətˌɪv
detailˈdiː.teɪl
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
!
Corroborativekəɹˈɒbɹətˌɪv
fiddlestickˈfɪdl̩.stɪks
!
KO
Andˈænd
you're
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
badbˈæd
asəz
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
withwˈɪð
yourjˈɔː
cockkˈɒk
—
and-a-bull
storiesstˈɔːɹɪz
aboutɐbˈaʊt
catchingkˈætʃɪŋ
hishˈɪz
eyeˈaɪ
andˈænd
hishˈɪz
whistlingwˈɪslɪŋ
anˈɐn
airˈeə
.
Butbˈʌt
that's
sosˈəʊ
likelˈaɪk
youjˈuː
!
Youjˈuː
mustmˈʌst
putpʊt
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
oarˈɔː
!
POOH-BAH
Butbˈʌt
howhˈaʊ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
yourjˈɔː
bigbˈɪɡ
rightɹˈaɪt
armˈɑːm
?
PITTI-SING
Yesjˈɛs
,
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
snickersneeˌsnɪk.əˈsniː
!
KO
Wellwˈɛl
,
wellwˈɛl
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
mindmˈaɪnd
thatðˈæt
nownˈaʊ
.
There's
onlyˈəʊnli
onewˈɒn
thingθˈɪŋ
totˈuː
bebˈiː
donedˈʌn
.
Nanki-Poo
hasn't
startedstˈɑːtɪd
yetjˈɛt
—
heˈhiː
mustmˈʌst
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
lifelˈaɪf
againɐɡˈɛn
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
(Enter Nanki-Poo and Yum-Yum prepared for
KO
journeydʒˈɜːni
)
Herehˈiə
heˈhiː
comeskˈʌmz
.
Herehˈiə
,
Nanki-Poo
,
I've
goodɡˈʊd
newsnjˈuːz
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
—
you're
reprievedɹɪpɹˈiːvd
.
NANKI-POO
Ohˈəʊ
,
butbˈʌt
it's
tootˈuː
latelˈeɪt
.
I'm
a
deaddˈɛd
manmˈæn
,
andˈænd
I'm
offˈɒf
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
honeymoonhˈʌnɪmˌuːn
.
KO
Nonsensenˈɒnsəns
!
A
terribletˈɛɹəbəl
thingθˈɪŋ
hashˈæz
justdʒˈʌst
happenedhˈæpənd
.
Itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
you're
theðə
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
theðə
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
.
NANKI-POO
Yesjˈɛs
,
butbˈʌt
thatðˈæt
happenedhˈæpənd
somesˈʌm
timetˈaɪm
agoɐɡˈəʊ
.
KO
Isˈɪz
thisðˈɪs
a
timetˈaɪm
forfˈɔː
airyˈeəɹi
persiflageˈpɜː.sɪ.flɑːʒ
?
Yourjˈɔː
fatherfˈɑːðɐ
isˈɪz
herehˈiə
,
andˈænd
withwˈɪð
Katisha
!
NANKI-POO
Mymˈaɪ
fatherfˈɑːðɐ
!
Andˈænd
withwˈɪð
Katisha
!
KO
Yesjˈɛs
,
heˈhiː
wantswˈɒnts
youjˈuː
particularlypətˈɪkjʊləli
.
POOH-BAH
Sosˈəʊ
doesdəz
sheʃˈiː
.
YUM-YUM
Ohˈəʊ
,
butbˈʌt
he's
marriedmˈæɹɪd
nownˈaʊ
.
KO
Butbˈʌt
,
blessblˈɛs
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
!
whatwˈɒt
hashˈæz
thatðˈæt
totˈuː
dodə
withwˈɪð
itˈɪt
?
NANKI-POO
Katisha
claimsklˈeɪmz
memˈiː
inˈɪn
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
,
butbˈʌt
I
can't
marrymˈæɹi
herhˈɜː
becausebɪkˈʌz
I'm
marriedmˈæɹɪd
alreadyɔːlɹˈɛdi
—
consequentlykˈɒnsɪkwəntli
sheʃˈiː
willwˈɪl
insistɪnsˈɪst
onˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
executionˌɛksɪkjˈuːʃən
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
I'm
executedˈɛksɪkjˌuːtɪd
,
mymˈaɪ
wifewˈaɪf
willwˈɪl
havehəv
totˈuː
bebˈiː
buriedbˈɛɹɪd
aliveɐlˈaɪv
.
YUM-YUM
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
ourˈaʊə
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
.
KO
Yesjˈɛs
.
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
what's
totˈuː
bebˈiː
donedˈʌn
.
NANKI-POO
There's
onewˈɒn
chancetʃˈɑːns
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
.
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
couldkˈʊd
persuadepəswˈeɪd
Katisha
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
youjˈuː
,
sheʃˈiː
wouldwˈʊd
havehəv
nonəʊ
furtherfˈɜːðɐ
claimklˈeɪm
onˈɒn
memˈiː
,
andˈænd
inˈɪn
thatðˈæt
casekˈeɪs
I
couldkˈʊd
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
lifelˈaɪf
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
anyˈɛni
fearfˈiə
ofˈɒv
beingbˈiːɪŋ
putpʊt
totˈuː
deathdˈɛθ
.
KO
I
marrymˈæɹi
Katisha
!
YUM-YUM
I
reallyɹˈiəli
thinkθˈɪŋk
it's
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
coursekˈɔːs
.
KO
Butbˈʌt
,
mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
girlɡˈɜːl
,
havehəv
youjˈuː
seensˈiːn
herhˈɜː
?
She's
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
appallingɐpˈɔːlɪŋ
!
PITTI-SING
Ahˈɑː
!
that's
onlyˈəʊnli
herhˈɜː
facefˈeɪs
.
Sheʃˈiː
hashˈæz
a
leftlˈɛft
elbowˈɛlbəʊ
whichwˈɪtʃ
peoplepˈiːpəl
comekˈʌm
milesmˈaɪlz
totˈuː
seesˈiː
!
POOH-BAH
I
aməm
toldtˈəʊld
thatðˈæt
herhˈɜː
rightɹˈaɪt
heelhˈiːl
isˈɪz
muchmˈʌtʃ
admiredɐdmˈaɪəd
bybˈaɪ
connoisseurskˌɒnəsˈɜːz
.
KO
Mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
sirsˈɜː
,
I
declinedɪklˈaɪn
totˈuː
pinpˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
uponəpˈɒn
anyˈɛni
lady's
rightɹˈaɪt
heelhˈiːl
.
NANKI-POO
Itˈɪt
comeskˈʌmz
totˈuː
thisðˈɪs
:
Whilewˈaɪl
Katisha
isˈɪz
singlesˈɪŋɡəl
,
I
preferpɹɪfˈɜː
totˈuː
bebˈiː
a
disembodieddˌɪsɛmbˈɒdɪd
spiritspˈɪɹɪt
.
Whenwˈɛn
Katisha
isˈɪz
marriedmˈæɹɪd
,
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
asəz
welcomewˈɛlkʌm
asəz
theðə
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
inˈɪn
springspɹˈɪŋ
.
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
NANKI-POO
andˈænd
KO-KO
.
With YUM-YUM, PITTI-SING, and POOH-BAH
NANKI-POO
Theðə
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
thatðˈæt
bloomblˈuːm
inˈɪn
theðə
springspɹˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
Breathebɹˈiːð
promisepɹˈɒmɪs
ofˈɒv
merrymˈɛɹi
sunshinesˈʌnʃaɪn
—
Asəz
wewˈiː
merrilymˈɛɹɪli
dancedˈɑːns
andˈænd
wewˈiː
singsˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
Wewˈiː
welcomewˈɛlkʌm
theðə
hopehˈəʊp
thatðˈæt
theyðˈeɪ
bringbɹˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
Ofˈɒv
a
summersˈʌmɐ
ofˈɒv
rosesɹˈəʊzɪz
andˈænd
winewˈaɪn
.
Andˈænd
that's
whatwˈɒt
wewˈiː
meanmˈiːn
whenwˈɛn
wewˈiː
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
a
thingθˈɪŋ
Isˈɪz
welcomewˈɛlkʌm
asəz
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
thatðˈæt
bloomblˈuːm
inˈɪn
theðə
springspɹˈɪŋ
.
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
ALL
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
KO
Theðə
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
thatðˈæt
bloomblˈuːm
inˈɪn
theðə
springspɹˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
Havehəv
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
totˈuː
dodə
withwˈɪð
theðə
casekˈeɪs
.
I've
gotɡˈɒt
totˈuː
taketˈeɪk
underˈʌndɐ
mymˈaɪ
wingwˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
A
mostmˈəʊst
unattractiveʌnɐtɹˈæktɪv
oldˈəʊld
thingθˈɪŋ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
,
Withwˈɪð
a
caricaturekˈæɹɪkətʃˌɔː
ofˈɒv
a
facefˈeɪs
Andˈænd
that's
whatwˈɒt
I
meanmˈiːn
whenwˈɛn
I
saysˈeɪ
,
orˈɔː
I
singsˈɪŋ
,
"
Ohˈəʊ
,
botherbˈɒðɐ
theðə
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
thatðˈæt
bloomblˈuːm
inˈɪn
theðə
springspɹˈɪŋ
.
"
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
ALL
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
Tra
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
[Dance and exeunt Nanki-Poo, Yum-Yum, Pooh-Bah, Pitti-Sing, and
Enter Katisha.
KO-KO
RECITATIVEɹɛsɪtəˈtiːv
andˈænd
SONGsˈɒŋ
.
KATISHA
Aloneɐlˈəʊn
,
andˈænd
yetjˈɛt
aliveɐlˈaɪv
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
sepulchresˈɛpʌlkɐ
!
Mymˈaɪ
soulsˈəʊl
isˈɪz
stillstˈɪl
mymˈaɪ
body's
prisonerpɹˈɪzənɐ
!
Remoteɹɪmˈəʊt
theðə
peacepˈiːs
thatðˈæt
Deathdˈɛθ
aloneɐlˈəʊn
cankˈæn
giveɡˈɪv
—
Mymˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
,
totˈuː
waitwˈeɪt
!
mymˈaɪ
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
,
totˈuː
livelɪv
!
SONG
Heartshˈɑːts
dodə
notnˈɒt
breakbɹˈeɪk
!
Theyðˈeɪ
stingstˈɪŋ
andˈænd
acheˈeɪk
Forfˈɔː
oldˈəʊld
love's
sakeˈseɪk
,
Butbˈʌt
dodə
notnˈɒt
diedˈaɪ
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
withwˈɪð
eachˈiːtʃ
breathbɹˈɛθ
Theyðˈeɪ
longlˈɒŋ
forfˈɔː
deathdˈɛθ
Asəz
witnesseth
Theðə
livinglˈɪvɪŋ
I
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
livinglˈɪvɪŋ
I
!
Comekˈʌm
,
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
whywˈaɪ
,
Whenwˈɛn
hopehˈəʊp
isˈɪz
goneɡˈɒn
,
Dostdˈɒst
thouðaʊ
staystˈeɪ
onˈɒn
?
Whywˈaɪ
lingerlˈɪŋɡɐ
herehˈiə
,
Wherewˈeə
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
dreardɹˈiə
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
livinglˈɪvɪŋ
I
!
Comekˈʌm
,
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
whywˈaɪ
,
Whenwˈɛn
hopehˈəʊp
isˈɪz
goneɡˈɒn
,
Dostdˈɒst
thouðaʊ
staystˈeɪ
onˈɒn
?
Maymˈeɪ
notnˈɒt
a
cheatedtʃˈiːtɪd
maidenmˈeɪdən
diedˈaɪ
?
(entering and approaching her timidly).
KO
Katisha
!
KATISHA
Theðə
miscreantmˈɪskɹiənt
whohˈuː
robbedɹˈɒbd
memˈiː
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
!
Butbˈʌt
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
pursuespəsjˈuːz
—
theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
heatinghˈiːtɪŋ
theðə
cauldronkˈɔːldɹən
!
KO
Katisha
—
beholdbɪhˈəʊld
a
suppliantsəplˈaɪənt
atˈæt
yourjˈɔː
feetfˈiːt
!
Katisha
—
mercymˈɜːsi
!
KATISHA
Mercymˈɜːsi
?
Hadhˈæd
youjˈuː
mercymˈɜːsi
onˈɒn
himhˈɪm
?
Seesˈiː
herehˈiə
,
youjˈuː
!
Youjˈuː
havehəv
slainslˈeɪn
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
.
Heˈhiː
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
lovelˈʌv
memˈiː
,
butbˈʌt
heˈhiː
wouldwˈʊd
havehəv
lovedlˈʌvd
memˈiː
inˈɪn
timetˈaɪm
.
I
aməm
anˈɐn
acquiredɐkwˈaɪəd
tastetˈeɪst
—
onlyˈəʊnli
theðə
educatedˈɛdʒuːkˌeɪtɪd
palatepˈælət
cankˈæn
appreciateɐpɹˈiːʃɪˌeɪt
memˈiː
.
I
waswˈɒz
educatingˈɛdʒuːkˌeɪtɪŋ
hishˈɪz
palatepˈælət
whenwˈɛn
heˈhiː
leftlˈɛft
memˈiː
.
Wellwˈɛl
,
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
deaddˈɛd
,
andˈænd
wherewˈeə
shallʃˈæl
I
findfˈaɪnd
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
?
Itˈɪt
takestˈeɪks
yearsjˈiəz
totˈuː
traintɹˈeɪn
a
manmˈæn
totˈuː
lovelˈʌv
memˈiː
.
Aməm
I
totˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
throughθɹˈuː
theðə
wearywˈiəɹi
roundɹˈaʊnd
againɐɡˈɛn
,
andˈænd
,
atˈæt
theðə
samesˈeɪm
timetˈaɪm
,
imploreɪmplˈɔː
mercymˈɜːsi
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
whohˈuː
robbedɹˈɒbd
memˈiː
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
preypɹˈeɪ
—
I
meanmˈiːn
mymˈaɪ
pupilpjˈuːpəl
—
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
hishˈɪz
educationˌɛdʒuːkˈeɪʃən
waswˈɒz
onˈɒn
theðə
pointpˈɔɪnt
ofˈɒv
completionkəmplˈiːʃən
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
wherewˈeə
shallʃˈæl
I
findfˈaɪnd
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
?
KO
(
suddenlysˈʌdənli
,
andˈænd
withwˈɪð
greatɡɹˈeɪt
vehemencevˈiəməns
).
Herehˈiə
!—
Herehˈiə
!
KATISHA
Whatwˈɒt
!!!
KO
(
withwˈɪð
intenseɪntˈɛns
passionpˈæʃən
).
Katisha
,
forfˈɔː
yearsjˈiəz
I
havehəv
lovedlˈʌvd
youjˈuː
withwˈɪð
a
white-hot
passionpˈæʃən
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
slowlyslˈəʊli
butbˈʌt
surelyʃˈɔːli
consumingkənsˈuːmɪŋ
mymˈaɪ
veryvˈɛɹi
vitalsvˈaɪtəlz
!
Ahˈɑː
,
shrinkʃɹˈɪŋk
notnˈɒt
fromfɹˈɒm
memˈiː
!
Ifˈɪf
thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
aught of woman's mercy in your heart, turn not away from a
KO
love-sick
suppliantsəplˈaɪənt
whosehˈuːz
everyˈɛvɹi
fibrefˈaɪbɐ
thrillsθɹˈɪlz
atˈæt
yourjˈɔː
tiniesttˈaɪniəst
touchtˈʌtʃ
!
Truetɹˈuː
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
thatðˈæt
,
underˈʌndɐ
a
poorpˈɔː
maskmˈɑːsk
ofˈɒv
disgustdɪsɡˈʌst
,
I
havehəv
endeavouredɛndˈɛvəd
totˈuː
concealkənsˈiːl
a
passionpˈæʃən
whosehˈuːz
innerˈɪnɐ
firesfˈaɪəz
areə(ɹ)
broilingbɹˈɔɪlɪŋ
theðə
soulsˈəʊl
withinwɪðˈɪn
memˈiː
!
Butbˈʌt
theðə
firefˈaɪə
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
smotheredsmˈʌðəd
—
itˈɪt
defiesdɪfˈaɪz
allˈɔːl
attemptsɐtˈɛmpts
atˈæt
extinctionɛkstˈɪŋkʃən
,
andˈænd
,
breakingbɹˈeɪkɪŋ
forthfˈɔːθ
,
allˈɔːl
theðə
moremˈɔː
eagerlyˈiːɡəli
forfˈɔː
itsˈɪts
longlˈɒŋ
restraintɹɪstɹˈeɪnt
,
itˈɪt
declaresdɪklˈeəz
itselfɪtsˈɛlf
inˈɪn
wordswˈɜːdz
thatðˈæt
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
weighedwˈeɪd
—
thatðˈæt
cannotˈkænɒt
bebˈiː
schooledskˈuːld
—
thatðˈæt
shouldʃˈʊd
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
tootˈuː
severelysɪvˈiəli
criticisedkɹˈɪtɪsˌaɪzd
.
Katisha
,
I
daredˈeə
notnˈɒt
hopehˈəʊp
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
lovelˈʌv
—
butbˈʌt
I
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
livelɪv
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
itˈɪt
!
Darlingdˈɑːlɪŋ
!
KATISHA
Youjˈuː
,
whosehˈuːz
handshˈændz
stillstˈɪl
reekɹˈiːk
withwˈɪð
theðə
bloodblˈʌd
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
,
daredˈeə
totˈuː
addressəˈdɹɛs
wordswˈɜːdz
ofˈɒv
passionpˈæʃən
totˈuː
theðə
womanwˈʊmən
youjˈuː
havehəv
sosˈəʊ
foullyfˈaʊli
wrongedɹˈɒŋd
!
KO
I
dodə
—
acceptɐksˈɛpt
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
,
orˈɔː
I
perishpˈɛɹɪʃ
onˈɒn
theðə
spotspˈɒt
!
KATISHA
Goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
!
Whohˈuː
knowsnˈəʊz
sosˈəʊ
wellwˈɛl
asəz
I
thatðˈæt
nonəʊ
onewˈɒn
everˈɛvɐ
yetjˈɛt
dieddˈaɪd
ofˈɒv
a
brokenbɹˈəʊkən
hearthˈɑːt
!
KO
Youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
notnˈɒt
whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
saysˈeɪ
.
Listenlˈɪsən
!
KO-KO
Onˈɒn
a
treetɹˈiː
bybˈaɪ
a
riverˈɹɪvɚ
a
littlelˈɪtəl
tom-tit
Sangsˈæŋ
"
Willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
Andˈænd
I
saidsˈɛd
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
,
"
Dicky-bird
,
whywˈaɪ
dodə
youjˈuː
sitsˈɪt
Singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
Willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow'
?"
"
Isˈɪz
itˈɪt
weaknesswˈiːknəs
ofˈɒv
intellectˈɪntəlˌɛkt
,
birdiebˈɜːdi
?"
I
criedkɹˈaɪd
,
"
Orˈɔː
a
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
toughtˈʌf
wormwˈɜːm
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
littlelˈɪtəl
insideˈɪnsaɪd
?"
Withwˈɪð
a
shakeʃˈeɪk
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
poorpˈɔː
littlelˈɪtəl
headhˈɛd
,
heˈhiː
repliedɹɪplˈaɪd
,
"
Ohˈəʊ
,
willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
Heˈhiː
slappedslˈæpt
atˈæt
hishˈɪz
chesttʃˈɛst
,
asəz
heˈhiː
satsˈæt
onˈɒn
thatðˈæt
boughbˈaʊ
,
Singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
"
Willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
Andˈænd
a
coldkˈəʊld
perspirationpəspəɹˈeɪʃən
bespangled
hishˈɪz
browbɹˈaʊ
,
Ohˈəʊ
,
willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!
Heˈhiː
sobbedsˈɒbd
andˈænd
heˈhiː
sighedsˈaɪd
,
andˈænd
a
gurgleɡˈɜːɡəl
heˈhiː
gaveɡˈeɪv
,
Thenðˈɛn
heˈhiː
plungedplˈʌndʒd
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
intoˈɪntʊ
theðə
billowybˈɪləʊi
wavewˈeɪv
,
Andˈænd
anˈɐn
echoˈɛkəʊ
aroseɐɹˈəʊz
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
suicide's
graveɡɹeɪv
—
"
Ohˈəʊ
,
willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
Nownˈaʊ
I
feelfˈiːl
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
sureʃˈɔː
asəz
I'm
sureʃˈɔː
thatðˈæt
mymˈaɪ
namenˈeɪm
Isn't
Willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
,
Thatðˈæt
'twas
blightedblˈaɪtɪd
affectionɐfˈɛkʃən
thatðˈæt
mademˈeɪd
himhˈɪm
exclaimɛksklˈeɪm
"
Ohˈəʊ
,
willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
Andˈænd
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
remainɹɪmˈeɪn
callouskˈæləs
andˈænd
obdurateˈɒbdjɔːɹət
,
I
Shallʃˈæl
perishpˈɛɹɪʃ
asəz
heˈhiː
diddˈɪd
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
willwˈɪl
knownˈəʊ
whywˈaɪ
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
I
probablypɹˈɒbəbli
shallʃˈæl
notnˈɒt
exclaimɛksklˈeɪm
asəz
I
diedˈaɪ
,
"
Ohˈəʊ
,
willowwˈɪləʊ
,
titwillow
,
titwillow
!"
(
Duringdjˈɔːɹɪŋ
thisðˈɪs
songsˈɒŋ
Katisha
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
greatlyɡɹˈeɪtli
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
,
andˈænd
atˈæt
theðə
endˈɛnd
isˈɪz
almostˈɔːlməʊst
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
)
KATISHA
(
whimperingwˈɪmpəɹɪŋ
).
Diddˈɪd
heˈhiː
reallyɹˈiəli
diedˈaɪ
ofˈɒv
lovelˈʌv
?
KO
Heˈhiː
reallyɹˈiəli
diddˈɪd
.
KATISHA
Allˈɔːl
onˈɒn
accountɐkˈaʊnt
ofˈɒv
a
cruelkɹˈuːəl
littlelˈɪtəl
henhˈɛn
?
KO
Yesjˈɛs
.
KATISHA
Poorpˈɔː
littlelˈɪtəl
chaptʃˈæp
!
KO
It's
anˈɐn
affectingɐfˈɛktɪŋ
taletˈeɪl
,
andˈænd
quitekwaɪt
truetɹˈuː
.
I
knewnjˈuː
theðə
birdbˈɜːd
intimatelyˈɪntɪmətli
.
KATISHA
Diddˈɪd
youjˈuː
?
Heˈhiː
mustmˈʌst
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
veryvˈɛɹi
fondfˈɒnd
ofˈɒv
herhˈɜː
.
KO
Hishˈɪz
devotiondɪvˈəʊʃən
waswˈɒz
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
extraordinaryɛkstɹˈɔːdɪnəɹi
.
KATISHA
(
stillstˈɪl
whimperingwˈɪmpəɹɪŋ
).
Poorpˈɔː
littlelˈɪtəl
chaptʃˈæp
!
Andˈænd
—
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
I
refuseˈɹɛfjuːs
youjˈuː
,
willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
andˈænd
dodə
theðə
samesˈeɪm
?
KO
Atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
KATISHA
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
—
youjˈuː
mustn't
!
Anythingˈɛnɪθˌɪŋ
butbˈʌt
thatðˈæt
!
(
Fallsfˈɔːlz
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
breastbɹˈɛst
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
I'm
a
sillysˈɪli
littlelˈɪtəl
gooseɡˈuːs
!
KO
(
makingmˈeɪkɪŋ
a
wryɹˈaɪ
facefˈeɪs
).
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
!
KATISHA
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
won't
hatehˈeɪt
memˈiː
becausebɪkˈʌz
I'm
justdʒˈʌst
a
littlelˈɪtəl
teenytˈiːni
weenywˈiːni
weewˈiː
bitbˈɪt
bloodthirstyblˈʌdθɜːsti
,
willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
?
KO
Hatehˈeɪt
youjˈuː
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
Katisha
!
isˈɪz
thereðˈeə
notnˈɒt
beautybjˈuːti
evenˈiːvən
inˈɪn
bloodthirstiness
?
KATISHA
Mymˈaɪ
ideaaɪdˈiə
exactlyɛɡzˈæktli
.
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
KATISHA
andˈænd
KO-KO
.
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
beautybjˈuːti
inˈɪn
theðə
bellowbˈɛləʊ
ofˈɒv
theðə
blastblˈɑːst
,
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
grandeurɡɹændˈɜː
inˈɪn
theðə
growlingɡɹˈaʊlɪŋ
ofˈɒv
theðə
galeɡˈeɪl
,
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
eloquentˈɛləkwənt
outpouringaʊtpˈɔːɹɪŋ
Whenwˈɛn
theðə
lionlˈaɪən
isˈɪz
a-roaring
,
Andˈænd
theðə
tigertˈaɪɡɐ
isˈɪz
a-lashing
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
tailtˈeɪl
!
KO
Yesjˈɛs
,
I
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
seesˈiː
a
tigertˈaɪɡɐ
Fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
Congoˈkɒŋɡəʊ
orˈɔː
theðə
Nigerˈnaɪ.d͡ʒə(ɹ)
,
Andˈænd
especiallyɪspˈɛʃəlˌi
whenwˈɛn
lashinglˈæʃɪŋ
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
tailtˈeɪl
!
KATISHA
Volcanoesvɒlkˈeɪnəʊz
havehəv
a
splendorsplˈɛndɐ
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
grimɡɹˈɪm
,
Andˈænd
earthquakesˈɜːθkweɪks
onlyˈəʊnli
terrifytˈɛɹɪfˌaɪ
theðə
doltsdˈəʊlts
,
Butbˈʌt
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
who's
scientificsaɪəntˈɪfɪk
There's
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
that's
terrifictəɹˈɪfɪk
Inˈɪn
theðə
fallingfˈɔːlɪŋ
ofˈɒv
a
flightflˈaɪt
ofˈɒv
thunderboltsθˈʌndəbˌəʊlts
!
KO
Yesjˈɛs
,
inˈɪn
spitespˈaɪt
ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
mymˈaɪ
meeknessmˈiːknəs
,
Ifˈɪf
I
havehəv
a
littlelˈɪtəl
weaknesswˈiːknəs
,
It's
a
passionpˈæʃən
forfˈɔː
a
flightflˈaɪt
ofˈɒv
thunderboltsθˈʌndəbˌəʊlts
!
BOTH
Ifˈɪf
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
sosˈəʊ
,
Singsˈɪŋ
derrydˈɛɹi
downdˈaʊn
derrydˈɛɹi
!
It's
evidentˈɛvɪdənt
,
veryvˈɛɹi
,
Ourˈaʊə
tastestˈeɪsts
areə(ɹ)
onewˈɒn
.
Awayɐwˈeɪ
we'll
goɡˈəʊ
,
Andˈænd
merrilymˈɛɹɪli
marrymˈæɹi
,
Nornˈɔː
tardily
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Tilltˈɪl
daydˈeɪ
isˈɪz
donedˈʌn
!
KO
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
beautybjˈuːti
inˈɪn
extremeɛkstɹˈiːm
oldˈəʊld
ageˈeɪdʒ
—
Dodə
youjˈuː
fancyfˈænsi
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
elderlyˈɛldəli
enoughɪnˈʌf
?
Informationˌɪnfəmˈeɪʃən
I'm
requestingɹɪkwˈɛstɪŋ
Onˈɒn
a
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
interestingˈɪntɹəstɪŋ
:
Isˈɪz
a
maidenmˈeɪdən
allˈɔːl
theðə
betterbˈɛtɐ
whenwˈɛn
she's
toughtˈʌf
?
KATISHA
Throughoutθɹuːˈaʊt
thisðˈɪs
widewˈaɪd
dominiondəmˈɪniən
It's
theðə
generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
opinionəpˈɪniən
Thatðˈæt
she'll
lastlˈɑːst
a
goodɡˈʊd
dealdˈiːl
longerlˈɒŋɡɐ
whenwˈɛn
she's
toughtˈʌf
.
KO
Areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
oldˈəʊld
enoughɪnˈʌf
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
,
dodə
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
?
Won't
youjˈuː
waitwˈeɪt
tilltˈɪl
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
eightyˈeɪti
inˈɪn
theðə
shadeʃˈeɪd
?
There's
a
fascinationfˌæsɪnˈeɪʃən
franticfɹˈɑːntɪk
Inˈɪn
a
ruinɹˈuːɪn
that's
romanticɹəʊmˈæntɪk
;
Dodə
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
sufficientlysəfˈɪʃəntli
decayeddɪkˈeɪd
?
KATISHA
Totˈuː
theðə
mattermˈætɐ
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
mentionmˈɛnʃən
I
havehəv
givenɡˈɪvən
somesˈʌm
attentionɐtˈɛnʃən
,
Andˈænd
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
I
aməm
sufficientlysəfˈɪʃəntli
decayeddɪkˈeɪd
.
BOTH
Ifˈɪf
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
sosˈəʊ
,
Singsˈɪŋ
derrydˈɛɹi
downdˈaʊn
derrydˈɛɹi
!
It's
evidentˈɛvɪdənt
,
veryvˈɛɹi
,
Ourˈaʊə
tastestˈeɪsts
areə(ɹ)
onewˈɒn
!
Awayɐwˈeɪ
we'll
goɡˈəʊ
,
Andˈænd
merrilymˈɛɹɪli
marrymˈæɹi
,
Nornˈɔː
tardily
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Tilltˈɪl
daydˈeɪ
isˈɪz
donedˈʌn
!
[Exeunt
BOTH
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
.
Flourishflˈʌɹɪʃ
.
Enter the Mikado, attended by Pish-Tush and Court.
MIKADO
Nownˈaʊ
thenðˈɛn
,
we've
hadhˈæd
a
capitalkˈæpɪtəl
lunchlˈʌntʃ
,
andˈænd
we're
quitekwaɪt
readyɹˈɛdi
.
Havehəv
allˈɔːl
theðə
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
preparationspɹˌɛpəɹˈeɪʃənz
beenbˈiːn
mademˈeɪd
?
PISH-TUSH
Yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
,
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
preparedpɹɪpˈeəd
.
MIKADO
Thenðˈɛn
producepɹəˈd͡ʒuːs
theðə
unfortunateʌnfˈɔːtʃənət
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
andˈænd
hishˈɪz
twotˈuː
well-meaning
butbˈʌt
misguidedmɪsɡˈaɪdɪd
accomplicesɐkˈɒmplɪsɪz
.
Enter Ko-Ko, Katisha, Pooh-Bah, and Pitti-Sing.
They throw
MIKADO
themselvesðɛmsˈɛlvz
atˈæt
theðə
Mikado's
feetfˈiːt
KATISHA
Mercymˈɜːsi
!
Mercymˈɜːsi
forfˈɔː
Ko-Ko
!
Mercymˈɜːsi
forfˈɔː
Pitti-Sing
!
Mercymˈɜːsi
evenˈiːvən
forfˈɔː
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
!
MIKADO
I
begbˈɛɡ
yourjˈɔː
pardonpˈɑːdən
,
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
I
quitekwaɪt
caughtkˈɔːt
thatðˈæt
remarkɹɪˈmɑɹk
.
POOH-BAH
Mercymˈɜːsi
evenˈiːvən
forfˈɔː
Pooh-Bahˈpuːbɑː
.
KATISHA
Mercymˈɜːsi
!
Mymˈaɪ
husbandhˈʌsbənd
thatðˈæt
waswˈɒz
totˈuː
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
isˈɪz
deaddˈɛd
,
andˈænd
I
havehəv
justdʒˈʌst
marriedmˈæɹɪd
thisðˈɪs
miserablemˈɪzɹəbəl
objectˈɒb.d͡ʒɛkt
.
MIKADO
Ohˈəʊ
!
You've
notnˈɒt
beenbˈiːn
longlˈɒŋ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
itˈɪt
!
KO
Wewˈiː
werewˈɜː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
beforebɪfˈɔː
theðə
Registrarɹˈɛdʒɪstɹˌɑː
.
POOH-BAH
I
aməm
theðə
Registrarɹˈɛdʒɪstɹˌɑː
.
MIKADO
I
seesˈiː
.
Butbˈʌt
mymˈaɪ
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
isˈɪz
thatðˈæt
,
asəz
youjˈuː
havehəv
slainslˈeɪn
theðə
Heirˈeə
Apparentɐpˈæɹənt
——
Enter Nanki-Poo and Yum-Yum.
They kneel.
NANKI-POO
Theðə
Heirˈeə
Apparentɐpˈæɹənt
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
slainslˈeɪn
.
MIKADO
Blessblˈɛs
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
,
mymˈaɪ
sonsˈʌn
!
YUM-YUM
Andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
electedɪlˈɛktɪd
!
KATISHA
(
seizingsˈiːzɪŋ
Ko-Ko
).
Traitortɹˈeɪtɐ
,
youjˈuː
havehəv
deceiveddɪsˈiːvd
memˈiː
!
MIKADO
Yesjˈɛs
,
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
entitledɛntˈaɪtəld
totˈuː
a
littlelˈɪtəl
explanationɛksplɐnˈeɪʃən
,
butbˈʌt
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
heˈhiː
willwˈɪl
giveɡˈɪv
itˈɪt
betterbˈɛtɐ
wholehˈəʊl
thanðˈɐn
inˈɪn
piecespˈiːsɪz
.
KO
Yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
,
it's
likelˈaɪk
thisðˈɪs
:
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
truetɹˈuː
thatðˈæt
I
statedstˈeɪtɪd
thatðˈæt
I
hadhˈæd
killedkˈɪld
Nanki-Poo
——
MIKADO
Yesjˈɛs
,
withwˈɪð
mostmˈəʊst
affectingɐfˈɛktɪŋ
particularspətˈɪkjʊləz
.
POOH-BAH
Merelymˈiəli
corroborativekəɹˈɒbɹətˌɪv
detailˈdiː.teɪl
intendedɪntˈɛndɪd
totˈuː
giveɡˈɪv
artisticɑːtˈɪstɪk
verisimilitudevˈɛɹɪsˌɪmɪlˌɪtjuːd
totˈuː
a
baldbˈɔːld
andˈænd
——
KO
Willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
refrainɹɪfɹˈeɪn
fromfɹˈɒm
puttingˈpʊtɪŋ
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
oarˈɔː
?
(
Totˈuː
Mikadomɪkˈɑːdəʊ
)
It's
likelˈaɪk
thisðˈɪs
:
Whenwˈɛn
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
sayssˈɛz
,
"
Letlˈɛt
a
thingθˈɪŋ
bebˈiː
donedˈʌn
,"
it's
asəz
goodɡˈʊd
asəz
donedˈʌn
—
practicallypɹˈæktɪkli
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
donedˈʌn
—
becausebɪkˈʌz
yourjˈɔː
Majesty's
willwˈɪl
isˈɪz
lawlˈɔː
.
Yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
sayssˈɛz
,
"
Killkˈɪl
a
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
,"
andˈænd
a
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
isˈɪz
toldtˈəʊld
offˈɒf
totˈuː
bebˈiː
killedkˈɪld
.
Consequentlykˈɒnsɪkwəntli
,
thatðˈæt
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
isˈɪz
asəz
goodɡˈʊd
asəz
deaddˈɛd
—
practicallypɹˈæktɪkli
,
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
deaddˈɛd
—
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
deaddˈɛd
,
whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
saysˈeɪ
sosˈəʊ
?
MIKADO
I
seesˈiː
.
Nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
couldkˈʊd
possiblypˈɒsəbli
bebˈiː
moremˈɔː
satisfactorysˌætɪsfˈæktəɹˌi
!
PITTI-SING
Forfˈɔː
he's
goneɡˈɒn
andˈænd
marriedmˈæɹɪd
Yum-Yum
—
ALL
Yum-Yum
!
PITTI-SING
Yourjˈɔː
angerˈæŋɡɐ
praypɹˈeɪ
burybˈɛɹi
,
Forfˈɔː
allˈɔːl
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
merrymˈɛɹi
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
hadhˈæd
betterbˈɛtɐ
succumbsəkˈʌm
—
ALL
Cumb
—
cumb
.
PITTI-SING
Andˈænd
joindʒˈɔɪn
ourˈaʊə
expressionsɛkspɹˈɛʃənz
ofˈɒv
gleeɡlˈiː
!
KO
Onˈɒn
thisðˈɪs
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
I
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
bebˈiː
dumbdˈʌm
—
ALL
Dumbdˈʌm
—
dumbdˈʌm
!
KO
Yourjˈɔː
notionsnˈəʊʃənz
,
thoughðˈəʊ
manymˈɛni
,
Areə(ɹ)
notnˈɒt
worthwˈɜːθ
a
pennypˈɛni
,
Theðə
wordwˈɜːd
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
guidanceɡˈaɪdəns
isˈɪz
"
Mummˈʌm
"—
ALL
Mummˈʌm
—
Mummˈʌm
!
KO
You've
a
veryvˈɛɹi
goodɡˈʊd
bargainbˈɑːɡɪn
inˈɪn
memˈiː
.
ALL
Onˈɒn
thisðˈɪs
subjectˈsʌb.d͡ʒɛkt
wewˈiː
praypɹˈeɪ
youjˈuː
bebˈiː
dumbdˈʌm
—
Dumbdˈʌm
—
dumbdˈʌm
!
Wewˈiː
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
hadhˈæd
betterbˈɛtɐ
succumbsəkˈʌm
—
Cumb
—
cumb
!
You'll
findfˈaɪnd
thereðˈeə
areə(ɹ)
manymˈɛni
Who'll
wedwˈɛd
forfˈɔː
a
pennypˈɛni
,
Thereðˈeə
areə(ɹ)
lotslˈɒts
ofˈɒv
goodɡˈʊd
fishfˈɪʃ
inˈɪn
theðə
seasˈiː
.
YUM-YUM
andˈænd
NANKnæŋk
.
Theðə
threatenedθɹˈɛtənd
cloudklˈaʊd
hashˈæz
passedpˈɑːst
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
Andˈænd
brightlybɹˈaɪtli
shinesʃˈaɪnz
theðə
dawningdˈɔːnɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
;
Whatwˈɒt
thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
nightnˈaɪt
maymˈeɪ
comekˈʌm
tootˈuː
soonsˈuːn
,
We've
yearsjˈiəz
andˈænd
yearsjˈiəz
ofˈɒv
afternoonˌɑːf.təˈnuːn
!
ALL
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
theðə
throngθɹˈɒŋ
Ourˈaʊə
joydʒˈɔɪ
advanceɐdvˈæns
,
With laughing song
ALL
Andˈænd
merrymˈɛɹi
dancedˈɑːns
,
With joyous shout and ringing cheer,
ALL
Inaugurateɪnˈɔːɡjʊɹˌeɪt
ourˈaʊə
newnjˈuː
careerkəɹˈiə
!
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
theðə
throngθɹˈɒŋ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.