Sullivan, Arthur
Iolanthe
Full Libretto
Source
ACT I
ACT II
ACT I
FLETA
A
rusticɹˈʌstɪk
bridgebɹˈɪdʒ
crosseskɹˈɒsɪz
theðə
riverˈɹɪvɚ
.
Enter Fairies, led by Leila, Celia, and Fleta.
FLETA
Theyðˈeɪ
triptɹˈɪp
aroundɐɹˈaʊnd
theðə
stagestˈeɪdʒ
,
singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
asəz
theyðˈeɪ
dancedˈɑːns
.
CHORUS
Trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
hitherhˈɪðɐ
,
trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
thitherðˈɪðɐ
,
Nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
knowsnˈəʊz
whywˈaɪ
orˈɔː
whitherwˈɪðɐ
;
Wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
dancedˈɑːns
andˈænd
wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
singsˈɪŋ
Roundɹˈaʊnd
aboutɐbˈaʊt
ourˈaʊə
fairyfˈeəɹi
ringɹˈɪŋ
!
CELIA
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
daintydˈeɪnti
littlelˈɪtəl
fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
,
Everˈɛvɐ
singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
,
everˈɛvɐ
dancingdˈɑːnsɪŋ
;
Wewˈiː
indulgeɪndˈʌldʒ
inˈɪn
ourˈaʊə
vagariesvˈeɪɡəɹˌɪz
Inˈɪn
a
fashionfˈæʃən
mostmˈəʊst
entrancingɛntɹˈɑːnsɪŋ
.
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
askˈɑːsk
theðə
specialspˈɛʃəl
functionfˈʌŋkʃən
Ofˈɒv
ourˈaʊə
never-ceasing
motionmˈəʊʃən
,
Wewˈiː
replyɹɪplˈaɪ
,
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
compunctionkəmpˈʌŋkʃən
,
Thatðˈæt
wewˈiː
haven't
anyˈɛni
notionnˈəʊʃən
!
CHORUS
Nonəʊ
,
wewˈiː
haven't
anyˈɛni
notionnˈəʊʃən
!
Trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
hitherhˈɪðɐ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
LEILA
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
askˈɑːsk
usˈʌs
howhˈaʊ
wewˈiː
livelɪv
,
Loverslˈʌvəz
allˈɔːl
essentialsɪsˈɛnʃəlz
giveɡˈɪv
—
We can ride on lovers' sighs,
LEILA
Warmwˈɔːm
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
inˈɪn
lovers'
eyesˈaɪz
,
Bathebˈeɪð
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
inˈɪn
lovers'
tearstɪɹz
,
Clotheklˈəʊð
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
withwˈɪð
lovers'
fearsfˈiəz
,
Armˈɑːm
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
withwˈɪð
lovers'
dartsdˈɑːts
,
Hide ourselves in lovers' hearts.
LEILA
Whenwˈɛn
youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
usˈʌs
,
you'll
discoverdɪskˈʌvɐ
Thatðˈæt
wewˈiː
almostˈɔːlməʊst
livelɪv
onˈɒn
loverlˈʌvɐ
!
CHORUS
Yesjˈɛs
,
wewˈiː
livelɪv
onˈɒn
loverlˈʌvɐ
!
Trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
hitherhˈɪðɐ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
At the end of Chorus, all sigh wearily
CELIA
Ahˈɑː
,
it's
allˈɔːl
veryvˈɛɹi
wellwˈɛl
,
butbˈʌt
sincesˈɪns
ourˈaʊə
Queenkwˈiːn
banishedbˈænɪʃt
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
,
fairyfˈeəɹi
revelsɹˈɛvəlz
havehəv
notnˈɒt
beenbˈiːn
whatwˈɒt
theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
!
LEILA
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
waswˈɒz
theðə
lifelˈaɪf
andˈænd
soulsˈəʊl
ofˈɒv
Fairylandfˈeəɹɪlˌænd
.
Whywˈaɪ
,
sheʃˈiː
wroteɹˈəʊt
allˈɔːl
ourˈaʊə
songssˈɒŋz
andˈænd
arrangedɐɹˈeɪndʒd
allˈɔːl
ourˈaʊə
dancesdˈɑːnsɪz
!
Wewˈiː
singsˈɪŋ
herhˈɜː
songssˈɒŋz
andˈænd
wewˈiː
triptɹˈɪp
herhˈɜː
measuresmˈɛʒəz
,
butbˈʌt
wewˈiː
don't
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
!
FLETA
Totˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
thatðˈæt
five-and-twenty
yearsjˈiəz
havehəv
elapsedɪlˈæpsd
sincesˈɪns
sheʃˈiː
waswˈɒz
banishedbˈænɪʃt
!
Whatwˈɒt
couldkˈʊd
sheʃˈiː
havehəv
donedˈʌn
totˈuː
havehəv
deserveddɪzˈɜːvd
sosˈəʊ
terribletˈɛɹəbəl
a
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
?
LEILA
Somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
awfulˈɔːfəl
!
Sheʃˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
!
FLETA
Ohˈəʊ
!
Isˈɪz
itˈɪt
injudiciousɪndʒuːdˈɪʃəs
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
?
LEILA
Injudiciousɪndʒuːdˈɪʃəs
?
Itˈɪt
strikesstɹˈaɪks
atˈæt
theðə
rootɹˈuːt
ofˈɒv
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
fairyfˈeəɹi
systemsˈɪstəm
!
Bybˈaɪ
ourˈaʊə
lawslˈɔːz
,
theðə
fairyfˈeəɹi
whohˈuː
marriesmˈæɹɪz
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
diesdˈaɪz
!
CELIA
Butbˈʌt
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
didn't
diedˈaɪ
!
Enter Fairy Queen
QUEEN
Nonəʊ
,
becausebɪkˈʌz
yourjˈɔː
Queenkwˈiːn
,
whohˈuː
lovedlˈʌvd
herhˈɜː
withwˈɪð
a
surpassingsəpˈɑːsɪŋ
lovelˈʌv
,
commutedkəmjˈuːtɪd
herhˈɜː
sentencesˈɛntəns
totˈuː
penalpˈiːnəl
servitudesˈɜːvɪtjˌuːd
forfˈɔː
lifelˈaɪf
,
onˈɒn
conditionkəndˈɪʃən
thatðˈæt
sheʃˈiː
leftlˈɛft
herhˈɜː
husbandhˈʌsbənd
andˈænd
nevernˈɛvɐ
communicatedkəmjˈuːnɪkˌeɪtɪd
withwˈɪð
himhˈɪm
againɐɡˈɛn
!
LEILA
Thatðˈæt
sentencesˈɛntəns
ofˈɒv
penalpˈiːnəl
servitudesˈɜːvɪtjˌuːd
sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
nownˈaʊ
workingwˈɜːkɪŋ
outˈaʊt
,
onˈɒn
herhˈɜː
headhˈɛd
,
atˈæt
theðə
bottombˈɒtəm
ofˈɒv
thatðˈæt
streamstɹˈiːm
!
QUEEN
Yesjˈɛs
,
butbˈʌt
whenwˈɛn
I
banishedbˈænɪʃt
herhˈɜː
,
I
gaveɡˈeɪv
herhˈɜː
allˈɔːl
theðə
pleasantplˈɛzənt
placesplˈeɪsɪz
ofˈɒv
theðə
earthˈɜːθ
totˈuː
dwelldwˈɛl
inˈɪn
.
I'm
sureʃˈɔː
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
intendedɪntˈɛndɪd
thatðˈæt
sheʃˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
goɡˈəʊ
andˈænd
livelɪv
atˈæt
theðə
bottombˈɒtəm
ofˈɒv
a
streamstɹˈiːm
!
Itˈɪt
makesmˈeɪks
memˈiː
perfectlypˈɜːfɛktlˌi
wretchedɹˈɛtʃɪd
totˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
ofˈɒv
theðə
discomfortdɪskˈʌmfət
sheʃˈiː
mustmˈʌst
havehəv
undergoneˌʌndəɡˈɒn
!
LEILA
Thinkθˈɪŋk
ofˈɒv
theðə
dampdˈæmp
!
Andˈænd
herhˈɜː
chesttʃˈɛst
waswˈɒz
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
delicatedˈɛlɪkət
.
QUEEN
Andˈænd
theðə
frogsfɹˈɒɡz
!
Ughˈʌɡ
!
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
shallʃˈæl
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
anyˈɛni
peacepˈiːs
ofˈɒv
mindmˈaɪnd
untilʌntˈɪl
I
knownˈəʊ
whywˈaɪ
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
wentwˈɛnt
totˈuː
livelɪv
amongɐmˈʌŋ
theðə
frogsfɹˈɒɡz
!
FLETA
Thenðˈɛn
whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
summonsˈʌmən
herhˈɜː
andˈænd
askˈɑːsk
herhˈɜː
?
QUEEN
Whywˈaɪ
?
Becausebɪkˈʌz
ifˈɪf
I
setsˈɛt
eyesˈaɪz
onˈɒn
herhˈɜː
I
shouldʃˈʊd
forgivefəɡˈɪv
herhˈɜː
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
!
CELIA
Thenðˈɛn
whywˈaɪ
notnˈɒt
forgivefəɡˈɪv
herhˈɜː
?
Twenty-fiveˌtwɛntiˈfaɪv
yearsjˈiəz
—
it's
a
longlˈɒŋ
timetˈaɪm
!
LEILA
Thinkθˈɪŋk
howhˈaʊ
wewˈiː
lovedlˈʌvd
herhˈɜː
!
QUEEN
Lovedlˈʌvd
herhˈɜː
?
Whatwˈɒt
waswˈɒz
yourjˈɔː
lovelˈʌv
totˈuː
minemˈaɪn
?
Whywˈaɪ
,
sheʃˈiː
waswˈɒz
invaluableɪnvˈæljuːəbəl
totˈuː
memˈiː
!
Whohˈuː
taughttˈɔːt
memˈiː
totˈuː
curlkˈɜːl
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
insideˈɪnsaɪd
a
buttercupbˈʌtəkˌʌp
?
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Whohˈuː
taughttˈɔːt
memˈiː
totˈuː
swingswˈɪŋ
uponəpˈɒn
a
cobwebkˈɒbwɛb
?
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Whohˈuː
taughttˈɔːt
memˈiː
totˈuː
divedˈaɪv
intoˈɪntʊ
a
dewdropdjˈuːdɹɒp
—
totˈuː
nestlenˈɛsəl
inˈɪn
a
nutshellnˈʌtʃɛl
—
totˈuː
gambolɡˈæmbɒl
uponəpˈɒn
gossamerɡˈɒsəmɐ
?
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
LEILA
Sheʃˈiː
certainlysˈɜːtənli
diddˈɪd
surprisingsəpɹˈaɪzɪŋ
thingsθˈɪŋz
!
Oh, give her back to us, great Queen, for your sake if
FLETA
notnˈɒt
forfˈɔː
oursˈaʊəz
!
(
Allˈɔːl
kneelnˈiːl
inˈɪn
supplicationsˌʌplɪkˈeɪʃən
)
QUEENkwˈiːn
(
irresoluteɪˈrɛz.əˌl(j)uːt
).
Ohˈəʊ
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
strongstɹˈɒŋ
,
butbˈʌt
I
aməm
weakwˈiːk
!
I
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
marblemˈɑːbəl
,
butbˈʌt
I
aməm
clayklˈeɪ
!
Herhˈɜː
punishmentpˈʌnɪʃmənt
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
heavierhˈɛviɐ
thanðˈɐn
I
intendedɪntˈɛndɪd
.
I
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
meanmˈiːn
thatðˈæt
sheʃˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
livelɪv
amongɐmˈʌŋ
theðə
frogsfɹˈɒɡz
—
andˈænd
—
wellwˈɛl
,
wellwˈɛl
,
itˈɪt
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
asəz
youjˈuː
wishwˈɪʃ
—
itˈɪt
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
asəz
youjˈuː
wishwˈɪʃ
!
QUEEN
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Fromfɹˈɒm
thyðˈaɪ
darkdˈɑːk
exileˈɛɡzaɪl
thouðaʊ
artˈɑːt
summonedsˈʌmənd
!
Comekˈʌm
totˈuː
ourˈaʊə
callkˈɔːl
—
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
CELIA
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
LEILA
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
ALL
Comekˈʌm
totˈuː
ourˈaʊə
callkˈɔːl
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
,
comekˈʌm
!
(Iolanthe rises from the water.
ALL
Sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
cladklˈæd
inˈɪn
water-weeds
.
Sheʃˈiː
approaches the Queen with head bent and arms crossed)
IOLANTHE
Withwˈɪð
humbledhˈʌmbəld
breastbɹˈɛst
Andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
hopehˈəʊp
laidlˈeɪd
lowlˈəʊ
,
Totˈuː
thyðˈaɪ
behestbɪhˈɛst
,
Offendedəfˈɛndɪd
Queenkwˈiːn
,
I
bowbəʊ
!
QUEEN
Forfˈɔː
a
darkdˈɑːk
sinsɪn
againstɐɡˈɛnst
ourˈaʊə
fairyfˈeəɹi
lawslˈɔːz
Wewˈiː
sentsˈɛnt
theeðˈiː
intoˈɪntʊ
life-longˈlaɪf.lɔːŋ
banishmentbˈænɪʃmənt
;
Butbˈʌt
mercymˈɜːsi
holdshˈəʊldz
herhˈɜː
swayswˈeɪ
withinwɪðˈɪn
ourˈaʊə
heartshˈɑːts
—
Riseɹˈaɪz
—
thouðaʊ
artˈɑːt
pardonedpˈɑːdənd
!
IOLANTHE
Pardonedpˈɑːdənd
!
ALL
Pardonedpˈɑːdənd
!
(Her weeds fall from her, and she appears clothed as a fairy.
Queen places a diamond coronet on her head, and embraces her.
others also embrace her)
CHORUS
Welcomewˈɛlkʌm
totˈuː
ourˈaʊə
heartshˈɑːts
againɐɡˈɛn
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Wewˈiː
havehəv
sharedʃˈeəd
thyðˈaɪ
bitterbˈɪtɐ
painpˈeɪn
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
Everyˈɛvɹi
hearthˈɑːt
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
handhˈænd
Inˈɪn
ourˈaʊə
lovinglˈʌvɪŋ
littlelˈɪtəl
bandbˈænd
Welcomeswˈɛlkʌmz
theeðˈiː
totˈuː
Fairylandfˈeəɹɪlˌænd
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
QUEEN
Andˈænd
nownˈaʊ
,
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
,
withwˈɪð
allˈɔːl
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
totˈuː
choosetʃˈuːz
fromfɹˈɒm
,
whywˈaɪ
onˈɒn
earthˈɜːθ
diddˈɪd
youjˈuː
decidedɪsˈaɪd
totˈuː
livelɪv
atˈæt
theðə
bottombˈɒtəm
ofˈɒv
thatðˈæt
streamstɹˈiːm
?
IOLANTHE
Totˈuː
bebˈiː
nearnˈiə
mymˈaɪ
sonsˈʌn
,
Strephon
.
QUEEN
Blessblˈɛs
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
,
I
didn't
knownˈəʊ
youjˈuː
hadhˈæd
a
sonsˈʌn
.
IOLANTHE
Heˈhiː
waswˈɒz
bornbˈɔːn
soonsˈuːn
afterˈɑːftɐ
I
leftlˈɛft
mymˈaɪ
husbandhˈʌsbənd
bybˈaɪ
yourjˈɔː
royalɹˈɔɪəl
commandkəmˈɑːnd
—
butbˈʌt
heˈhiː
doesdəz
notnˈɒt
evenˈiːvən
knownˈəʊ
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
father's
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
.
FLETA
Howhˈaʊ
oldˈəʊld
isˈɪz
heˈhiː
?
IOLANTHE
Twenty-fourˌtwɛntiˈfɔː
.
LEILA
Twenty-fourˌtwɛntiˈfɔː
!
Nonəʊ
onewˈɒn
,
totˈuː
looklˈʊk
atˈæt
youjˈuː
,
wouldwˈʊd
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
hadhˈæd
a
sonsˈʌn
ofˈɒv
twenty-fourˌtwɛntiˈfɔː
!
Butbˈʌt
that's
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
theðə
advantagesɐdvˈɑːntɪdʒɪz
ofˈɒv
beingbˈiːɪŋ
immortalɪmˈɔːtəl
.
Wewˈiː
nevernˈɛvɐ
growɡɹˈəʊ
oldˈəʊld
!
Isˈɪz
heˈhiː
prettypɹˈɪti
?
IOLANTHE
He's
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
prettypɹˈɪti
,
butbˈʌt
he's
inclinedɪnklˈaɪnd
totˈuː
bebˈiː
stoutstˈaʊt
.
ALLˈɔːl
(
disappointeddˌɪsɐpˈɔɪntɪd
).
Ohˈəʊ
!
QUEEN
I
seesˈiː
nonəʊ
objectionɒbdʒˈɛkʃən
totˈuː
stoutness
,
inˈɪn
moderationmˌɒdəɹˈeɪʃən
.
CELIA
Andˈænd
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
heˈhiː
?
IOLANTHE
He's
anˈɐn
Arcadianɑɹˈkeɪdɪən
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
—
andˈænd
heˈhiː
loveslˈʌvz
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
,
a
Wardwˈɔːd
inˈɪn
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
.
CELIA
A
meremˈiə
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
!
andˈænd
heˈhiː
halfhˈɑːf
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
!
IOLANTHE
He's
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
—
butbˈʌt
hishˈɪz
legslˈɛɡz
areə(ɹ)
mortalmˈɔːtəl
.
ALL
Deardˈiə
memˈiː
!
QUEEN
I
havehəv
nonəʊ
reasonɹˈiːzən
totˈuː
supposesʌpˈəʊz
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
moremˈɔː
curiouskjˈʊɹɪəs
thanðˈɐn
otherˈʌðɐ
peoplepˈiːpəl
,
butbˈʌt
I
confesskənfˈɛs
I
shouldʃˈʊd
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
seesˈiː
a
personpˈɜːsən
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
,
butbˈʌt
whosehˈuːz
legslˈɛɡz
areə(ɹ)
mortalmˈɔːtəl
.
IOLANTHE
Nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
easierˈiːzɪɐ
,
forfˈɔː
herehˈiə
heˈhiː
comeskˈʌmz
!
(Enter Strephon, singing and dancing and playing on a flageolet.
He does not see the Fairies, who retire up stage as he enters)
STREPHON
Goodɡˈʊd
morrowmˈɒɹəʊ
,
goodɡˈʊd
motherˈmʌðə
!
Goodɡˈʊd
motherˈmʌðə
,
goodɡˈʊd
morrowmˈɒɹəʊ
!
Bybˈaɪ
somesˈʌm
meansmˈiːnz
orˈɔː
otherˈʌðɐ
,
Praypɹˈeɪ
banishbˈænɪʃ
yourjˈɔː
sorrowsˈɒɹəʊ
!
Withwˈɪð
joydʒˈɔɪ
beyondbɪjˈɒnd
tellingtˈɛlɪŋ
Mymˈaɪ
bosombˈʊsəm
isˈɪz
swellingswˈɛlɪŋ
,
Sosˈəʊ
joindʒˈɔɪn
inˈɪn
a
measuremˈɛʒɐ
Expressiveɛkspɹˈɛsɪv
ofˈɒv
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
,
Forfˈɔː
I'm
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
—
to-daytəˈdeɪ
—
Yesjˈɛs
,
I'm
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
CHORUS (aside).
STREPHON
Yesjˈɛs
,
he's
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
—
to-daytəˈdeɪ
—
Yesjˈɛs
,
he's
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
IOLANTHE
Thenðˈɛn
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
hashˈæz
atˈæt
lastlˈɑːst
givenɡˈɪvən
hishˈɪz
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
beautifulbjˈuːtɪfəl
wardwˈɔːd
,
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
?
STREPHON
Notnˈɒt
heˈhiː
,
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
.
Totˈuː
allˈɔːl
mymˈaɪ
tearfultˈiəfəl
prayerspɹɛɹz
heˈhiː
answersˈɑːnsəz
memˈiː
,
"
A
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
ladlˈæd
isˈɪz
nonəʊ
fitfˈɪt
helpmate
forfˈɔː
a
Wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
.
" I
stoodstˈʊd
inˈɪn
courtkˈɔːt
,
andˈænd
thereðˈeə
I
sangsˈæŋ
himhˈɪm
songssˈɒŋz
ofˈɒv
Arcadee
,
withwˈɪð
flageoletflˈeɪdʒɒlət
accompanimentɐkˈʌmpɐnˌɪmənt
—
inˈɪn
vainvˈeɪn
.
Atˈæt
firstfˈɜːst
heˈhiː
seemedsˈiːmd
amusedɐmjˈuːsd
,
sosˈəʊ
diddˈɪd
theðə
Barbˈɑː
;
butbˈʌt
quicklykwˈɪkli
wearyingwˈiəɹɪɪŋ
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
songsˈɒŋ
andˈænd
pipepˈaɪp
,
badebˈeɪd
memˈiː
getɡˈɛt
outˈaʊt
.
A
servilesˈɜːvaɪl
usherˈʌʃɐ
thenðˈɛn
,
inˈɪn
crumpledkɹˈʌmpəld
bandsbˈændz
andˈænd
rustyɹˈʌsti
bombazineˈbɒmbəziːn
,
ledlˈɛd
memˈiː
,
stillstˈɪl
singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
,
intoˈɪntʊ
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
Lanelˈeɪn
!
I'll
goɡˈəʊ
nonəʊ
moremˈɔː
;
I'll
marrymˈæɹi
herhˈɜː
to-daytəˈdeɪ
,
andˈænd
bravebɹˈeɪv
theðə
upshotˈʌpʃɒt
,
bebˈiː
itˈɪt
whatwˈɒt
itˈɪt
maymˈeɪ
!
(
Seessˈiːz
Fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
)
Butbˈʌt
whohˈuː
areə(ɹ)
theseðˈiːz
?
IOLANTHE
Ohˈəʊ
,
Strephon
!
rejoiceɹɪdʒˈɔɪs
withwˈɪð
memˈiː
,
mymˈaɪ
Queenkwˈiːn
hashˈæz
pardonedpˈɑːdənd
memˈiː
!
STREPHON
Pardonedpˈɑːdənd
youjˈuː
,
motherˈmʌðə
?
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
goodɡˈʊd
newsnjˈuːz
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
.
IOLANTHE
Andˈænd
theseðˈiːz
ladieslˈeɪdɪz
areə(ɹ)
mymˈaɪ
belovedbɪˈlʌvd
sisterssˈɪstəz
.
STREPHON
Yourjˈɔː
sisterssˈɪstəz
!
Thenðˈɛn
theyðˈeɪ
areə(ɹ)
—
mymˈaɪ
auntsˈɑːnts
!
QUEEN
A
pleasantplˈɛzənt
piecepˈiːs
ofˈɒv
newsnjˈuːz
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
bridebɹˈaɪd
onˈɒn
herhˈɜː
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
!
STREPHON
Hushhˈʌʃ
!
Mymˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
knowsnˈəʊz
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
fairyhood
.
I
daredˈeə
notnˈɒt
telltˈɛl
herhˈɜː
,
lestlˈɛst
itˈɪt
frightenfɹˈaɪtən
herhˈɜː
.
Sheʃˈiː
thinksθˈɪŋks
memˈiː
mortalmˈɔːtəl
,
andˈænd
preferspɹɪfˈɜːz
memˈiː
sosˈəʊ
.
LEILA
Yourjˈɔː
fairyhood
doesn't
seemsˈiːm
totˈuː
havehəv
donedˈʌn
youjˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
goodɡˈʊd
.
STREPHON
Muchmˈʌtʃ
goodɡˈʊd
!
Mymˈaɪ
deardˈiə
auntˈɑːnt
!
it's
theðə
cursekˈɜːs
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
!
What's
theðə
usejuːs
ofˈɒv
beingbˈiːɪŋ
halfhˈɑːf
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
?
Mymˈaɪ
bodybˈɒdi
cankˈæn
creepkɹˈiːp
throughθɹˈuː
a
keyholekˈiːhəʊl
,
butbˈʌt
what's
theðə
goodɡˈʊd
ofˈɒv
thatðˈæt
whenwˈɛn
mymˈaɪ
legslˈɛɡz
areə(ɹ)
leftlˈɛft
kickingkˈɪkɪŋ
behindbɪhˈaɪnd
?
I
cankˈæn
makemˈeɪk
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
invisibleɪnvˈɪzəbəl
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
,
butbˈʌt
that's
ofˈɒv
nonəʊ
usejuːs
whenwˈɛn
mymˈaɪ
legslˈɛɡz
remainɹɪmˈeɪn
exposedɛkspˈəʊzd
totˈuː
viewvjˈuː
!
Mymˈaɪ
brainbɹˈeɪn
isˈɪz
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
brainbɹˈeɪn
,
butbˈʌt
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
downwardsdˈaʊnwədz
I'm
a
gibberingdʒˈɪbəɹɪŋ
idiotˈɪdɪət
.
Mymˈaɪ
upperˈʌpɐ
halfhˈɑːf
isˈɪz
immortalɪmˈɔːtəl
,
butbˈʌt
mymˈaɪ
lowerˈləʊ.ə
halfhˈɑːf
growsɡɹˈəʊz
olderˈəʊldɐ
everyˈɛvɹi
daydˈeɪ
,
andˈænd
somesˈʌm
daydˈeɪ
orˈɔː
otherˈʌðɐ
mustmˈʌst
diedˈaɪ
ofˈɒv
oldˈəʊld
ageˈeɪdʒ
.
What's
totˈuː
becomebɪkˈʌm
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
upperˈʌpɐ
halfhˈɑːf
whenwˈɛn
I've
buriedbˈɛɹɪd
mymˈaɪ
lowerˈləʊ.ə
halfhˈɑːf
I
reallyɹˈiəli
don't
knownˈəʊ
!
FAIRIES
Poorpˈɔː
fellowfˈɛləʊ
!
QUEEN
I
seesˈiː
yourjˈɔː
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
,
butbˈʌt
withwˈɪð
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
brainbɹˈeɪn
youjˈuː
shouldʃˈʊd
seeksˈiːk
anˈɐn
intellectualˌɪntəlˈɛktʃuːəl
spheresfˈiə
ofˈɒv
actionˈækʃən
.
Letlˈɛt
memˈiː
seesˈiː
.
I've
a
boroughbˈʌɹɐ
orˈɔː
twotˈuː
atˈæt
mymˈaɪ
disposaldɪspˈəʊzəl
.
Wouldwˈʊd
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
?
IOLANTHE
A
fairyfˈeəɹi
Membermˈɛmbɐ
!
Thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
delightfuldɪlˈaɪtfəl
!
STREPHON
I'm
afraidɐfɹˈeɪd
I
shouldʃˈʊd
dodə
nonəʊ
goodɡˈʊd
thereðˈeə
—
youjˈuː
seesˈiː
,
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
,
I'm
a
Toryˈtɔː.ɹi
ofˈɒv
theðə
mostmˈəʊst
determineddɪtˈɜːmɪnd
descriptiondɪskɹˈɪpʃən
,
butbˈʌt
mymˈaɪ
legslˈɛɡz
areə(ɹ)
a
couplekˈʌpəl
ofˈɒv
confoundedkənfˈaʊndɪd
Radicalsɹˈædɪkəlz
,
andˈænd
,
onˈɒn
a
divisiondɪvˈɪʒən
,
they'd
bebˈiː
sureʃˈɔː
totˈuː
taketˈeɪk
memˈiː
intoˈɪntʊ
theðə
wrongɹˈɒŋ
lobbylˈɒbi
.
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
,
they're
twotˈuː
totˈuː
onewˈɒn
,
whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
a
strongstɹˈɒŋ
workingwˈɜːkɪŋ
majoritymədʒˈɒɹɪtˌi
.
QUEEN
Don't
letlˈɛt
thatðˈæt
distressdɪstɹˈɛs
youjˈuː
;
youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
returnedɹɪtˈɜːnd
asəz
a
Liberal-Conservative
,
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
legslˈɛɡz
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
ourˈaʊə
peculiarpɪkjˈuːliə
carekˈeə
.
STREPHON
(
bowingˈbaʊɪŋ
).
I
seesˈiː
yourjˈɔː
Majestymˈædʒəsti
doesdəz
notnˈɒt
dodə
thingsθˈɪŋz
bybˈaɪ
halveshˈɑːvz
.
QUEEN
Nonəʊ
,
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
feetfˈiːt
.
Farefˈeə
theeðˈiː
wellwˈɛl
,
attractiveɐtɹˈæktɪv
strangerstɹˈeɪndʒɐ
.
FAIRIES
Farefˈeə
theeðˈiː
wellwˈɛl
,
attractiveɐtɹˈæktɪv
strangerstɹˈeɪndʒɐ
.
QUEEN
Shouldstʃˈʊdst
thouðaʊ
bebˈiː
inˈɪn
doubtdˈaʊt
orˈɔː
dangerdˈeɪndʒɐ
,
Perilpˈɛɹəl
orˈɔː
perplexitee
,
Callkˈɔːl
usˈʌs
,
andˈænd
we'll
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
theeðˈiː
!
FAIRIES
Ayeeɪ
!
Callkˈɔːl
usˈʌs
,
andˈænd
we'll
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
theeðˈiː
!
Trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
hitherhˈɪðɐ
,
trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
thitherðˈɪðɐ
,
Nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
knowsnˈəʊz
whywˈaɪ
orˈɔː
whitherwˈɪðɐ
;
Wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
nownˈaʊ
bebˈiː
takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
wingwˈɪŋ
Totˈuː
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
fairyfˈeəɹi
ringɹˈɪŋ
!
(
Fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
andˈænd
Queenkwˈiːn
triptɹˈɪp
offˈɒf
,
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
,
whohˈuː
takestˈeɪks
anˈɐn
affectionateɐfˈɛkʃənət
farewellfeəwˈɛl
ofˈɒv
herhˈɜː
sonsˈʌn
,
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
offˈɒf
lastlˈɑːst
)
(Enter Phyllis, singing and dancing, and accompanying herself on a
FAIRIES
flageoletflˈeɪdʒɒlət
)
PHYLLIS
Goodɡˈʊd
morrowmˈɒɹəʊ
,
goodɡˈʊd
loverlˈʌvɐ
!
Goodɡˈʊd
loverlˈʌvɐ
,
goodɡˈʊd
morrowmˈɒɹəʊ
!
I
pritheepɹˈɪθiː
discoverdɪskˈʌvɐ
,
Stealstˈiːl
,
purchasepˈɜːtʃɪs
,
orˈɔː
borrowbˈɒɹəʊ
Somesˈʌm
meansmˈiːnz
ofˈɒv
concealingkənsˈiːlɪŋ
Theðə
carekˈeə
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
feelingfˈiːlɪŋ
,
Andˈænd
joindʒˈɔɪn
inˈɪn
a
measuremˈɛʒɐ
Expressiveɛkspɹˈɛsɪv
ofˈɒv
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
,
Forfˈɔː
we're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
—
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
Yesjˈɛs
,
we're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
BOTH
Yesjˈɛs
,
we're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
(embracing her).
STREPHON
Mymˈaɪ
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Andˈænd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
totˈuː
bebˈiː
mademˈeɪd
happyhˈæpi
forfˈɔː
everˈɛvɐ
.
PHYLLIS
Wellwˈɛl
,
we're
totˈuː
bebˈiː
marriedmˈæɹɪd
.
STREPHON
It's
theðə
samesˈeɪm
thingθˈɪŋ
.
PHYLLIS
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
.
Butbˈʌt
ohˈəʊ
,
Strephon
,
I
trembletɹˈɛmbəl
atˈæt
theðə
stepstˈɛp
I'm
takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
!
I
believebɪlˈiːv
it's
penalpˈiːnəl
servitudesˈɜːvɪtjˌuːd
forfˈɔː
lifelˈaɪf
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
a
Wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
Courtkˈɔːt
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellor's
consentkənsˈɛnt
!
I
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
ofˈɒv
ageˈeɪdʒ
inˈɪn
twotˈuː
yearsjˈiəz
.
Don't
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
couldkˈʊd
waitwˈeɪt
twotˈuː
yearsjˈiəz
?
STREPHON
Twotˈuː
yearsjˈiəz
.
Havehəv
youjˈuː
everˈɛvɐ
lookedlˈʊkt
inˈɪn
theðə
glassɡlˈɑːs
?
PHYLLIS
Nonəʊ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
.
Here, look at that (showing her a pocket mirror), and
STREPHON
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
thinkθˈɪŋk
itˈɪt
rationalɹˈæʃənəl
totˈuː
expectɛkspˈɛkt
memˈiː
totˈuː
waitwˈeɪt
twotˈuː
yearsjˈiəz
?
PHYLLIS
(
lookinglˈʊkɪŋ
atˈæt
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
).
Nonəʊ
.
You're
quitekwaɪt
rightɹˈaɪt
—
it's
askingˈɑːskɪŋ
tootˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
.
Onewˈɒn
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
reasonableɹˈiːzənəbəl
.
STREPHON
Besidesbɪsˈaɪdz
,
whohˈuː
knowsnˈəʊz
whatwˈɒt
willwˈɪl
happenhˈæpən
inˈɪn
twotˈuː
yearsjˈiəz
?
Why, you might fall in love with the Lord Chancellor himself by
STREPHON
thatðˈæt
timetˈaɪm
!
PHYLLIS
Yesjˈɛs
.
He's
a
cleanklˈiːn
oldˈəʊld
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
.
As it is, half the House of Lords are sighing at your
STREPHON
feetfˈiːt
.
PHYLLIS
Theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Lordslˈɔːdz
areə(ɹ)
certainlysˈɜːtənli
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
attentiveɐtˈɛntɪv
.
STREPHON
Attentiveɐtˈɛntɪv
?
I
shouldʃˈʊd
thinkθˈɪŋk
theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
!
Whywˈaɪ
diddˈɪd
five-and-twenty
Liberallˈɪbəɹəl
Peerspɪɹz
comekˈʌm
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
shootʃˈuːt
overˈəʊvɐ
yourjˈɔː
grass-plot
lastlˈɑːst
autumnˈɔːtʌm
?
Itˈɪt
couldn't
havehəv
beenbˈiːn
theðə
sparrowsspˈæɹəʊz
.
Whywˈaɪ
diddˈɪd
five-and-twenty
Conservativekənsˈɜːvətˌɪv
Peerspɪɹz
comekˈʌm
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
fishfˈɪʃ
yourjˈɔː
pondpˈɒnd
?
Don't
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
theðə
gold-fish
!
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
—
delaysdɪlˈeɪz
areə(ɹ)
dangerousdˈeɪndʒəɹəs
,
andˈænd
ifˈɪf
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
,
theðə
soonersˈuːnɐ
theðə
betterbˈɛtɐ
.
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
STREPHON
andˈænd
PHYLLISˈfɪlɪs
.
PHYLLIS
Nonenʌn
shallʃˈæl
partpˈɑːt
usˈʌs
fromfɹˈɒm
eachˈiːtʃ
otherˈʌðɐ
,
Onewˈɒn
inˈɪn
lifelˈaɪf
andˈænd
deathdˈɛθ
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
:
Allˈɔːl
inˈɪn
allˈɔːl
totˈuː
onewˈɒn
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
—
I
totˈuː
theeðˈiː
andˈænd
thouðaʊ
totˈuː
memˈiː
!
BOTH
Thouðaʊ
theðə
treetɹˈiː
andˈænd
I
theðə
flowerˈflaʊ.ə
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
idolˈaɪdəl
;
I
theðə
throngθɹˈɒŋ
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
daydˈeɪ
andˈænd
I
theðə
hourˈaʊə
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
singerˈsɪŋə
;
I
theðə
songsˈɒŋ
!
STREPHON
Allˈɔːl
inˈɪn
allˈɔːl
sincesˈɪns
thatðˈæt
fondfˈɒnd
meetingmˈiːtɪŋ
Whenwˈɛn
,
inˈɪn
joydʒˈɔɪ
,
I
wokewˈəʊk
totˈuː
findfˈaɪnd
Minemˈaɪn
theðə
hearthˈɑːt
withinwɪðˈɪn
theeðˈiː
beatingbˈiːtɪŋ
,
Minemˈaɪn
theðə
lovelˈʌv
thatðˈæt
hearthˈɑːt
enshrinedɛnʃɹˈaɪnd
!
BOTH
Thouðaʊ
theðə
streamstɹˈiːm
andˈænd
I
theðə
willowwˈɪləʊ
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
sculptorskˈʌlptɐ
;
I
theðə
clayklˈeɪ
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
Oceanˈəʊʃən
;
I
theðə
billowbˈɪləʊ
—
Thouðaʊ
theðə
sunrisesˈʌnɹaɪz
;
I
theðə
daydˈeɪ
!
(Exeunt Strephon and Phyllis
BOTH
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
)
(
Marchmˈɑːtʃ
.
Enter Procession of Peers)
CHORUS
Loudlylˈaʊdli
letlˈɛt
theðə
trumpettɹˈʌmpɪt
braybɹˈeɪ
!
Tantantara
!
Proudlypɹˈaʊdli
bangbˈæŋ
theðə
soundingsˈaʊndɪŋ
brassesbɹˈɑːsɪz
!
Tzing
!
Boombˈuːm
!
Asəz
uponəpˈɒn
itsˈɪts
lordlylˈɔːdli
waywˈeɪ
Thisðˈɪs
uniquejuːnˈiːk
processionpɹəsˈɛʃən
passespˈɑːsɪz
,
Tantantara
!
Tzing
!
Boombˈuːm
!
Bowbəʊ
,
bowbəʊ
,
yejiː
lowerˈləʊ.ə
middlemˈɪdəl
classesklˈɑːsɪz
!
Bowbəʊ
,
bowbəʊ
,
yejiː
tradesmentɹˈeɪdzmɛn
,
bowbəʊ
,
yejiː
massesmˈæsɪz
!
Blowblˈəʊ
theðə
trumpetstɹˈʌmpɪts
,
bangbˈæŋ
theðə
brassesbɹˈɑːsɪz
!
Tantantara
!
Tzing
!
Boombˈuːm
!
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
peerspɪɹz
ofˈɒv
highesthˈaɪəst
stationstˈeɪʃən
,
Paragonspˈæɹəɡənz
ofˈɒv
legislationlˌɛdʒɪslˈeɪʃən
,
Pillarspˈɪləz
ofˈɒv
theðə
Britishˈbɹɪtɪʃ
nationnˈeɪʃən
!
Tantantara
!
Tzing
!
Boombˈuːm
!
Enter the Lord Chancellor, followed by his train-bearer
LORD CHANCELLOR
Theðə
Lawlˈɔː
isˈɪz
theðə
truetɹˈuː
embodimentɛmbˈɒdɪmənt
Ofˈɒv
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
that's
excellentˈɛksələnt
.
Itˈɪt
hashˈæz
nonəʊ
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
faultfˈɒlt
orˈɔː
flawflˈɔː
,
Andˈænd
I
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
embodyɛmbˈɒdi
theðə
Lawlˈɔː
.
Theðə
constitutionalkˌɒnstɪtjˈuːʃənəl
guardianɡˈɑːdiən
I
Ofˈɒv
prettypɹˈɪti
youngjˈʌŋ
Wardswˈɔːdz
inˈɪn
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
,
Allˈɔːl
veryvˈɛɹi
agreeableɐɡɹˈiːəbəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
—
andˈænd
nonenʌn
Areə(ɹ)
overˈəʊvɐ
theðə
ageˈeɪdʒ
ofˈɒv
twenty-oneˌtwɛntiˈwʌn
.
A
pleasantplˈɛzənt
occupationˌɒkjʊpˈeɪʃən
forfˈɔː
A
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
susceptiblesəsˈɛptəbəl
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
!
ALL
A
pleasantplˈɛzənt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Butbˈʌt
thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
complimentˈkɑmpləmənt
impliedɪmplˈaɪd
Inflatesɪnflˈeɪts
memˈiː
withwˈɪð
legitimatelɪˈd͡ʒɪt.ɪ.mət
pridepɹˈaɪd
,
Itˈɪt
neverthelessnˌɛvəðəlˈɛs
can't
bebˈiː
denieddɪnˈaɪd
Thatðˈæt
itˈɪt
hashˈæz
itsˈɪts
inconvenientɪnkənvˈiːnɪənt
sidesˈaɪd
.
Forfˈɔː
I'm
notnˈɒt
sosˈəʊ
oldˈəʊld
,
andˈænd
notnˈɒt
sosˈəʊ
plainplˈeɪn
,
Andˈænd
I'm
quitekwaɪt
preparedpɹɪpˈeəd
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
againɐɡˈɛn
,
Butbˈʌt
there'd
bebˈiː
theðə
deucedjˈuːs
totˈuː
paypˈeɪ
inˈɪn
theðə
Lordslˈɔːdz
Ifˈɪf
I
fellfˈɛl
inˈɪn
lovelˈʌv
withwˈɪð
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
Wardswˈɔːdz
!
Whichwˈɪtʃ
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
triestɹˈaɪz
mymˈaɪ
tempertˈɛmpɐ
,
forfˈɔː
I'm
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
susceptiblesəsˈɛptəbəl
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
!
Whichwˈɪtʃ
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
onewˈɒn
who'd
marrymˈæɹi
a
Wardwˈɔːd
Mustmˈʌst
comekˈʌm
totˈuː
memˈiː
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
accordɐkˈɔːd
,
Andˈænd
inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
courtkˈɔːt
I
sitsˈɪt
allˈɔːl
daydˈeɪ
,
Givingɡˈɪvɪŋ
agreeableɐɡɹˈiːəbəl
girlsɡˈɜːlz
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
Withwˈɪð
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
himhˈɪm
—
andˈænd
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
heˈhiː
—
Andˈænd
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
—
andˈænd
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
yejiː
—
Andˈænd
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
thouðaʊ
—
andˈænd
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
theeðˈiː
—
Butbˈʌt
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
ohˈəʊ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
a
onewˈɒn
forfˈɔː
memˈiː
!
Whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
exasperatingɛɡzˈɑːspəɹˌeɪtɪŋ
forfˈɔː
A
highlyhˈaɪli
susceptiblesəsˈɛptəbəl
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
!
Whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Enter Lord Tolloller
LORD TOLL.
Andˈænd
nownˈaʊ
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
totˈuː
theðə
businessbˈɪznəs
ofˈɒv
theðə
daydˈeɪ
.
LORD CH.
Bybˈaɪ
allˈɔːl
meansmˈiːnz
.
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
,
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
a
Wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
Courtkˈɔːt
,
hashˈæz
sosˈəʊ
powerfullypˈaʊəfəli
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
yourjˈɔː
Lordshipslˈɔːdʃɪps
,
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
havehəv
appealedɐpˈiːld
totˈuː
memˈiː
in a body to give her to whichever one of you she may think proper
LORD CH.
totˈuː
selectsɪlˈɛkt
,
andˈænd
a
noblenˈəʊbəl
Lordlˈɔːd
hashˈæz
justdʒˈʌst
goneɡˈɒn
totˈuː
herhˈɜː
cottagekˈɒtɪdʒ
totˈuː
requestɹɪkwˈɛst
herhˈɜː
immediateɪmˈiːdɪət
attendanceɐtˈɛndəns
.
Itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
idleˈaɪdəl
totˈuː
denydɪnˈaɪ
thatðˈæt
I
,
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
,
havehəv
theðə
misfortunemɪsfˈɔːtʃuːn
totˈuː
bebˈiː
singularlysˈɪŋɡjʊləli
attractedɐtɹˈæktɪd
bybˈaɪ
thisðˈɪs
youngjˈʌŋ
personpˈɜːsən
.
Mymˈaɪ
regardɹɪɡˈɑːd
forfˈɔː
herhˈɜː
isˈɪz
rapidlyɹˈæpɪdli
underminingˌʌndəmˈaɪnɪŋ
mymˈaɪ
constitutionkˌɒnstɪtjˈuːʃən
.
Threeθɹˈiː
monthsmˈʌnθs
agoɐɡˈəʊ
I
waswˈɒz
a
stoutstˈaʊt
manmˈæn
.
I
neednˈiːd
saysˈeɪ
nonəʊ
moremˈɔː
.
Ifˈɪf
I
couldkˈʊd
reconcileɹˈɛkənsˌaɪl
itˈɪt
withwˈɪð
mymˈaɪ
dutydjˈuːti
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
unhesitatinglyʌnhˈɛsɪtˌeɪtɪŋli
awardɐwˈɔːd
herhˈɜː
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
,
forfˈɔː
I
cankˈæn
conscientiouslykˌɒnsɪˈɛnʃəsli
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
I
knownˈəʊ
nonəʊ
manmˈæn
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
sosˈəʊ
wellwˈɛl
fittedfˈɪtɪd
totˈuː
renderɹˈɛndɐ
herhˈɜː
exceptionallyɛksˈɛpʃənəli
happyhˈæpi
.
(
Peerspɪɹz
:
Hearhˈiə
,
hearhˈiə
!)
Butbˈʌt
suchsˈʌtʃ
anˈɐn
awardɐwˈɔːd
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
openˈəʊpən
totˈuː
misconstruction
,
andˈænd
thereforeðˈeəfɔː
,
atˈæt
whateverwɒtˈɛvɐ
personalpˈɜːsənəl
inconvenienceɪnkənvˈiːnɪəns
,
I
waivewˈeɪv
mymˈaɪ
claimklˈeɪm
.
LORD TOLL.
Mymˈaɪ
Lordlˈɔːd
,
I
desiredɪzˈaɪə
,
onˈɒn
theðə
partpˈɑːt
ofˈɒv
thisðˈɪs
Househaʊs
,
totˈuː
expressɛkspɹˈɛs
itsˈɪts
sinceresɪnsˈiə
sympathysˈɪmpəθi
withwˈɪð
yourjˈɔː
Lordship's
mostmˈəʊst
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
positionpəzˈɪʃən
.
LORD CH.
I
thankθˈæŋk
yourjˈɔː
Lordshipslˈɔːdʃɪps
.
Theðə
feelingsfˈiːlɪŋz
ofˈɒv
a
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
inˈɪn
lovelˈʌv
withwˈɪð
a
Wardwˈɔːd
ofˈɒv
Courtkˈɔːt
areə(ɹ)
notnˈɒt
totˈuː
bebˈiː
enviedˈɛnvɪd
.
Whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
hishˈɪz
positionpəzˈɪʃən
?
Cankˈæn
heˈhiː
giveɡˈɪv
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
withwˈɪð
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
Wardwˈɔːd
?
Cankˈæn
heˈhiː
marrymˈæɹi
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
Wardwˈɔːd
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
consentkənsˈɛnt
?
Andˈænd
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
marriesmˈæɹɪz
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
Wardwˈɔːd
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
consentkənsˈɛnt
,
cankˈæn
heˈhiː
commitkəmˈɪt
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
forfˈɔː
contemptkəntˈɛmpt
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
Courtkˈɔːt
?
Andˈænd
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
commitkəmˈɪt
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
forfˈɔː
contemptkəntˈɛmpt
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
Courtkˈɔːt
,
cankˈæn
heˈhiː
appearɐpˈiə
bybˈaɪ
counselkˈaʊnsəl
beforebɪfˈɔː
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
,
totˈuː
movemˈuːv
forfˈɔː
arrestɐɹˈɛst
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
ownˈəʊn
judgementdʒˈʌdʒmənt
?
Ahˈɑː
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
totˈuː
havehəv
totˈuː
sitsˈɪt
uponəpˈɒn
a
woolsackwˈʊlsæk
whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
stuffedstˈʌft
withwˈɪð
suchsˈʌtʃ
thornsθˈɔːnz
asəz
theseðˈiːz
!
Enter Lord Mountararat
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Mymˈaɪ
Lordlˈɔːd
,
I
havehəv
muchmˈʌtʃ
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
inˈɪn
announcingɐnˈaʊnsɪŋ
thatðˈæt
I
havehəv
succeededsəksˈiːdɪd
inˈɪn
inducingɪndjˈuːsɪŋ
theðə
youngjˈʌŋ
personpˈɜːsən
totˈuː
presentˈpɹɛzənt
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
atˈæt
theðə
Barbˈɑː
ofˈɒv
thisðˈɪs
Househaʊs
.
Enter Phyllis
PHYLLIS
Mymˈaɪ
well-loved
Lordlˈɔːd
andˈænd
Guardianɡˈɑːdiən
deardˈiə
,
Youjˈuː
summonedsˈʌmənd
memˈiː
,
andˈænd
I
aməm
herehˈiə
!
CHORUS OF PEERS
Ohˈəʊ
,
raptureɹˈæptʃɐ
,
howhˈaʊ
beautifulbjˈuːtɪfəl
!
Howhˈaʊ
gentledʒˈɛntəl
—
howhˈaʊ
dutifuldjˈuːtɪfəl
!
LORD TOLLOLLER
Ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
theðə
youngjˈʌŋ
ladieslˈeɪdɪz
I
knownˈəʊ
Thisðˈɪs
prettypɹˈɪti
youngjˈʌŋ
lady's
theðə
fairestfˈeəɹəst
;
Herhˈɜː
lipslˈɪps
havehəv
theðə
rosiestɹˈəʊzɪəst
showʃˈəʊ
,
Herhˈɜː
eyesˈaɪz
areə(ɹ)
theðə
richestɹˈɪtʃəst
andˈænd
rarestɹˈeəɹəst
.
Herhˈɜː
origin's
lowlylˈəʊli
,
it's
truetɹˈuː
,
Butbˈʌt
ofˈɒv
birthbˈɜːθ
andˈænd
positionpəzˈɪʃən
I've
plentyplˈɛnti
;
I've
grammarɡɹˈæmɐ
andˈænd
spellingspˈɛlɪŋ
forfˈɔː
twotˈuː
,
Andˈænd
bloodblˈʌd
andˈænd
behaviourbɪhˈeɪvjɐ
forfˈɔː
twentytwˈɛnti
!
Herhˈɜː
origin's
lowlylˈəʊli
,
it's
truetɹˈuː
,
I've
grammarɡɹˈæmɐ
andˈænd
spellingspˈɛlɪŋ
forfˈɔː
twotˈuː
;
CHORUS
Ofˈɒv
birthbˈɜːθ
andˈænd
positionpəzˈɪʃən
he's
plentyplˈɛnti
,
Withwˈɪð
bloodblˈʌd
andˈænd
behaviourbɪhˈeɪvjɐ
forfˈɔː
twentytwˈɛnti
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Thoughðˈəʊ
theðə
viewsvjˈuːz
ofˈɒv
theðə
Househaʊs
havehəv
divergeddaɪvˈɜːdʒd
Onˈɒn
everyˈɛvɹi
conceivablekənsˈiːvəbəl
motionmˈəʊʃən
,
Allˈɔːl
questionskwˈɛstʃənz
ofˈɒv
Partypˈɑːti
areə(ɹ)
mergedmˈɜːdʒd
Inˈɪn
a
frenzyfɹˈɛnzi
ofˈɒv
lovelˈʌv
andˈænd
devotiondɪvˈəʊʃən
;
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
askˈɑːsk
usˈʌs
distinctlydɪstˈɪŋktli
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
Whatwˈɒt
Partypˈɑːti
wewˈiː
claimklˈeɪm
totˈuː
belongbɪlˈɒŋ
totˈuː
,
Wewˈiː
replyɹɪplˈaɪ
,
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
doubtdˈaʊt
orˈɔː
delaydɪlˈeɪ
,
Theðə
Partypˈɑːti
I'm
singingsˈɪŋɪŋ
thisðˈɪs
songsˈɒŋ
totˈuː
!
PHYLLIS
I'm
veryvˈɛɹi
muchmˈʌtʃ
painedpˈeɪnd
totˈuː
refuseˈɹɛfjuːs
,
Butbˈʌt
I'll
stickstˈɪk
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
pipespˈaɪps
andˈænd
mymˈaɪ
taborsˈteɪbə(ɹ)
;
I
cankˈæn
spellspˈɛl
allˈɔːl
theðə
wordswˈɜːdz
thatðˈæt
I
usejuːs
,
Andˈænd
mymˈaɪ
grammar's
asəz
goodɡˈʊd
asəz
mymˈaɪ
neighbours'
.
Asəz
forfˈɔː
birthbˈɜːθ
—
I
waswˈɒz
bornbˈɔːn
likelˈaɪk
theðə
restɹˈɛst
,
Mymˈaɪ
behaviourbɪhˈeɪvjɐ
isˈɪz
rusticɹˈʌstɪk
butbˈʌt
heartyhˈɑːti
,
And I know where to turn for the best,
PHYLLIS
Whenwˈɛn
I
wantwˈɒnt
a
particularpətˈɪkjʊlɐ
Partypˈɑːti
!
,
andˈænd
LORDlˈɔːd
MOUNTmˈaʊnt
.
Thoughðˈəʊ
herhˈɜː
stationstˈeɪʃən
isˈɪz
nonenʌn
ofˈɒv
theðə
bestbˈɛst
,
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
sheʃˈiː
waswˈɒz
bornbˈɔːn
likelˈaɪk
theðə
restɹˈɛst
;
Andˈænd
sheʃˈiː
knowsnˈəʊz
wherewˈeə
totˈuː
looklˈʊk
forfˈɔː
herhˈɜː
heartyhˈɑːti
,
Whenwˈɛn
sheʃˈiː
wantswˈɒnts
a
particularpətˈɪkjʊlɐ
Partypˈɑːti
!
Naynˈeɪ
,
tempttˈɛmpt
memˈiː
notnˈɒt
.
Totˈuː
rankɹˈæŋk
I'll
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
boundbˈaʊnd
;
Inˈɪn
lowlylˈəʊli
cotkˈɒt
Aloneɐlˈəʊn
isˈɪz
virtuevˈɜːtʃuː
foundfˈaʊnd
!
CHORUS
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
;
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
highhˈaɪ
rankɹˈæŋk
willwˈɪl
nevernˈɛvɐ
hurthˈɜːt
youjˈuː
,
Theðə
Peeragepˈiəɹɪdʒ
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
destitutedˈɛstɪtjˌuːt
ofˈɒv
virtuevˈɜːtʃuː
.
ALL
Spurnspˈɜːn
notnˈɒt
theðə
noblynˈəʊbli
bornbˈɔːn
Withwˈɪð
lovelˈʌv
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
,
Nornˈɔː
treattɹˈiːt
withwˈɪð
virtuousvˈɜːtʃuːəs
scornskˈɔːn
Theðə
well-connected
.
Highhˈaɪ
rankɹˈæŋk
involvesɪnvˈɒlvz
nonəʊ
shameʃˈeɪm
—
Wewˈiː
boastbˈəʊst
anˈɐn
equalˈiːkwəl
claimklˈeɪm
Withwˈɪð
himhˈɪm
ofˈɒv
humblehˈʌmbəl
namenˈeɪm
Totˈuː
bebˈiː
respectedɹɪspˈɛktɪd
!
Blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
Whenwˈɛn
virtuousvˈɜːtʃuːəs
lovelˈʌv
isˈɪz
soughtsˈɔːt
Thyðˈaɪ
powerpˈaʊɐ
isˈɪz
naughtnˈɔːt
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
datingdˈeɪtɪŋ
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
Floodflˈʌd
,
Blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
Ahˈɑː
,
blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
CHORUS
Whenwˈɛn
virtuousvˈɜːtʃuːəs
lovelˈʌv
isˈɪz
soughtsˈɔːt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Sparespˈeə
usˈʌs
theðə
bitterbˈɪtɐ
painpˈeɪn
Ofˈɒv
sternstˈɜːn
denialsdɪnˈaɪəlz
,
Nornˈɔː
withwˈɪð
low-born
disdaindɪsdˈeɪn
Augmentɔːɡˈmɛnt
ourˈaʊə
trialstɹˈaɪəlz
.
Heartshˈɑːts
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
purepjˈɔː
andˈænd
fairfˈeə
Maymˈeɪ
beatbˈiːt
inˈɪn
Belgrave
Squareskwˈeə
Asəz
inˈɪn
theðə
lowlylˈəʊli
airˈeə
Ofˈɒv
Sevensˈɛvən
Dialsdˈaɪəlz
!
Blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
Ofˈɒv
whatwˈɒt
availɐvˈeɪl
artˈɑːt
thouðaʊ
Totˈuː
servesˈɜːv
usˈʌs
nownˈaʊ
?
Thoughðˈəʊ
datingdˈeɪtɪŋ
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
Floodflˈʌd
,
Blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
Ahˈɑː
,
blueblˈuː
bloodblˈʌd
!
Ofˈɒv
whatwˈɒt
availɐvˈeɪl
artˈɑːt
thouðaʊ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
PHYLLIS
Mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
itˈɪt
maymˈeɪ
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
.
Withwˈɪð
griefɡɹˈiːf
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
isˈɪz
rivenɹˈɪvən
!
Youjˈuː
wastewˈeɪst
yourjˈɔː
timetˈaɪm
onˈɒn
memˈiː
,
Forfˈɔː
ahˈɑː
!
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
isˈɪz
givenɡˈɪvən
!
ALL
Givenɡˈɪvən
!
PHYLLIS
Yesjˈɛs
,
givenɡˈɪvən
!
ALL
Ohˈəʊ
,
horrorhˈɒɹɐ
!!!
LORD CHANCELLOR
Andˈænd
whohˈuː
hashˈæz
dareddˈeəd
totˈuː
bravebɹˈeɪv
ourˈaʊə
highhˈaɪ
displeasuredɪsplˈɛʒɐ
,
Andˈænd
thusðˈʌs
defydɪfˈaɪ
ourˈaʊə
definitedˈɛfɪnət
commandkəmˈɑːnd
?
Enter Strephon
STREPHON
'Tis
I
—
youngjˈʌŋ
Strephon
!
minemˈaɪn
thisðˈɪs
pricelesspɹˈaɪsləs
treasuretɹˈɛʒɐ
!
Againstɐɡˈɛnst
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
I
claimklˈeɪm
mymˈaɪ
darling's
handhˈænd
!
Phyllis rushes to his arms
STREPHON
A
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
I
—
ALL
A
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
heˈhiː
!
STREPHON
Ofˈɒv
Arcady-
ALL
Ofˈɒv
Arcadee
!
STREPHON
Betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
!
ALL
Betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
areə(ɹ)
theyðˈeɪ
—
STREPHON
Andˈænd
meanmˈiːn
totˈuː
be-bɪ
ALL
Espousedɛspˈaʊsd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
THE OTHERS
A
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
I
A
shepherdʃˈɛpəd
heˈhiː
Ofˈɒv
Arcadyɑɹˈkeɪdi
,
Ofˈɒv
Arcadee
,
Betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
,
Betrothedbɪtɹˈəʊðd
isˈɪz
heˈhiː
,
Andˈænd
meanmˈiːn
totˈuː
bebˈiː
Andˈænd
meansmˈiːnz
totˈuː
bebˈiː
Espousedɛspˈaʊsd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
Espousedɛspˈaʊsd
to-daytəˈdeɪ
!
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
LORDlˈɔːd
MOUNTARARAT
andˈænd
LORDlˈɔːd
TOLLOLLER
(aside to each other).
THE OTHERS
'Neath
thisðˈɪs
blowblˈəʊ
,
Worsewˈɜːs
thanðˈɐn
stabstˈæb
ofˈɒv
daggerdˈæɡɐ
—
Thoughðˈəʊ
wewˈiː
mo-
Mentarily
staggerstˈæɡɐ
,
Inˈɪn
eachˈiːtʃ
hearthˈɑːt
Proudpɹˈaʊd
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
innatelyɪnnˈeɪtli
—
Let's
departdɪpˈɑːt
,
Dignifieddˈɪɡnɪfˌaɪd
andˈænd
statelystˈeɪtli
!
ALL
Let's
departdɪpˈɑːt
,
Dignifieddˈɪɡnɪfˌaɪd
andˈænd
statelystˈeɪtli
!
CHORUS OF PEERS
Thoughðˈəʊ
ourˈaʊə
heartshˈɑːts
she's
badlybˈædli
bruisingbɹˈuːzɪŋ
,
Inˈɪn
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
suitorsˈuːtɐ
choosingtʃˈuːzɪŋ
,
Let's
pretendpɹɪtˈɛnd
it's
mostmˈəʊst
amusingɐmjˈuːsɪŋ
.
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
Tan-ta-ra
!
(Exeunt all the Peers, marching round stage with much dignity.
CHORUS OF PEERS
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
separatesˈsɛp.(ə.)ɹət
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
fromfɹˈɒm
Strephon
andˈænd
ordersˈɔːdəz
herhˈɜː
offˈɒf
.
Sheʃˈiː
followsfˈɒləʊz
Peerspɪɹz
.
Manent
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
andˈænd
Strephon
)
LORD CH.
Nownˈaʊ
,
sirsˈɜː
,
whatwˈɒt
excuseɪkˈskjuːz
havehəv
youjˈuː
totˈuː
offerˈɒfɐ
forfˈɔː
havinghˈævɪŋ
disobeyeddˌɪsəʊbˈeɪd
anˈɐn
orderˈɔːdɐ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Courtkˈɔːt
ofˈɒv
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
?
STREPHON
Mymˈaɪ
Lordlˈɔːd
,
I
knownˈəʊ
nonəʊ
Courtskˈɔːts
ofˈɒv
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
;
I
goɡˈəʊ
bybˈaɪ
Nature's
Actsˈækts
ofˈɒv
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
.
Theðə
beesbˈiːz
—
theðə
breezebɹˈiːz
—
theðə
seassˈiːz
—
theðə
rooksɹˈʊks
—
theðə
brooksbɹˈʊks
—
theðə
galesɡˈeɪlz
—
theðə
valesvˈeɪlz
—
theðə
fountainsfˈaʊntɪnz
andˈænd
theðə
mountainsmˈaʊntɪnz
crykɹˈaɪ
,
"
Youjˈuː
lovelˈʌv
thisðˈɪs
maidenmˈeɪdən
—
taketˈeɪk
herhˈɜː
,
wewˈiː
commandkəmˈɑːnd
youjˈuː
!"
'Tis
writɹˈɪt
inˈɪn
heavenhˈɛvən
bybˈaɪ
theðə
brightbɹˈaɪt
barbedbˈɑːbd
dartdˈɑːt
thatðˈæt
leapslˈiːps
forthfˈɔːθ
intoˈɪntʊ
luridlˈɔːɹɪd
lightlˈaɪt
fromfɹˈɒm
eachˈiːtʃ
grimɡɹˈɪm
thundercloudθˈʌndəklˌaʊd
.
Theðə
veryvˈɛɹi
rainɹˈeɪn
pourspˈɔːz
forthfˈɔːθ
herhˈɜː
sadsˈæd
andˈænd
soddensˈɒdən
sympathysˈɪmpəθi
!
Whenwˈɛn
chorusedkˈɔːɹuːsd
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
bidsbˈɪdz
memˈiː
taketˈeɪk
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
,
shallʃˈæl
I
replyɹɪplˈaɪ
,
"
Naynˈeɪ
,
butbˈʌt
a
certainsˈɜːtən
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
forbidsfəbˈɪdz
itˈɪt
"?
Sirsˈɜː
,
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
England's
Lordlˈɔːd
Highhˈaɪ
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
,
butbˈʌt
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
ofˈɒv
birdsbˈɜːdz
andˈænd
treestɹˈiːz
,
Kingkˈɪŋ
ofˈɒv
theðə
windswɪndz
andˈænd
Princepɹˈɪns
ofˈɒv
thundercloudsθˈʌndəklˌaʊdz
?
LORD CH.
Nonəʊ
.
It's a nice point.
LORD CH.
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
thatðˈæt
I
everˈɛvɐ
metmˈɛt
itˈɪt
beforebɪfˈɔː
.
Butbˈʌt
mymˈaɪ
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
isˈɪz
thatðˈæt
atˈæt
presentˈpɹɛzənt
there's
nonəʊ
evidenceˈɛvɪdəns
beforebɪfˈɔː
theðə
Courtkˈɔːt
thatðˈæt
chorusedkˈɔːɹuːsd
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
hashˈæz
interestedˈɪntɹəstɪd
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
inˈɪn
theðə
mattermˈætɐ
.
STREPHON
Nonəʊ
evidenceˈɛvɪdəns
!
Youjˈuː
havehəv
mymˈaɪ
wordwˈɜːd
forfˈɔː
itˈɪt
.
I
telltˈɛl
youjˈuː
thatðˈæt
sheʃˈiː
badebˈeɪd
memˈiː
taketˈeɪk
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
.
LORD CH.
Ahˈɑː
!
butbˈʌt
,
mymˈaɪ
goodɡˈʊd
sirsˈɜː
,
youjˈuː
mustn't
telltˈɛl
usˈʌs
whatwˈɒt
sheʃˈiː
toldtˈəʊld
youjˈuː
—
it's
notnˈɒt
evidenceˈɛvɪdəns
.
Nownˈaʊ
anˈɐn
affidavitˌæfɪdˈeɪvɪt
fromfɹˈɒm
a
thunderstormθˈʌndəstˌɔːm
,
orˈɔː
a
fewfjˈuː
wordswˈɜːdz
onˈɒn
oathˈəʊθ
fromfɹˈɒm
a
heavyhˈɛvi
showerˈʃaʊ.ə(ɹ)
,
wouldwˈʊd
meetmˈiːt
withwˈɪð
allˈɔːl
theðə
attentionɐtˈɛnʃən
theyðˈeɪ
deservedɪzˈɜːv
.
STREPHON
Andˈænd
havehəv
youjˈuː
theðə
hearthˈɑːt
totˈuː
applyəˈplaɪ
theðə
prosaicpɹəsˈeɪɪk
rulesɹˈuːlz
ofˈɒv
evidenceˈɛvɪdəns
totˈuː
a
casekˈeɪs
whichwˈɪtʃ
bubblesbˈʌbəlz
overˈəʊvɐ
withwˈɪð
poeticalpəʊˈɛtɪkəl
emotionɪmˈəʊʃən
?
LORD CH.
Distinctlydɪstˈɪŋktli
.
I
havehəv
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
keptkˈɛpt
mymˈaɪ
dutydjˈuːti
strictlystɹˈɪktli
beforebɪfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
eyesˈaɪz
,
andˈænd
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
totˈuː
thatðˈæt
factfˈækt
thatðˈæt
I
oweˈəʊ
mymˈaɪ
advancementɐdvˈænsmənt
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
presentˈpɹɛzənt
distinguisheddɪstˈɪŋɡwɪʃt
positionpəzˈɪʃən
.
LORD CHANCELLOR
Whenwˈɛn
I
wentwˈɛnt
totˈuː
theðə
Barbˈɑː
asəz
a
veryvˈɛɹi
youngjˈʌŋ
manmˈæn
,
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
I'll
workwˈɜːk
onˈɒn
a
newnjˈuː
andˈænd
originaləɹˈɪdʒɪnəl
planplˈæn
,
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
I'll
nevernˈɛvɐ
assumeɐsˈuːm
thatðˈæt
a
rogueɹˈəʊɡ
orˈɔː
a
thiefθˈiːf
Isˈɪz
a
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
worthywˈɜːði
implicitɪmplˈɪsɪt
beliefbɪlˈiːf
,
Becausebɪkˈʌz
hishˈɪz
attorneyɐtˈɜːni
hashˈæz
sentsˈɛnt
memˈiː
a
briefbɹˈiːf
,
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
!).
Ereˈeə
I
goɡˈəʊ
intoˈɪntʊ
courtkˈɔːt
I
willwˈɪl
readɹiːd
mymˈaɪ
briefbɹˈiːf
throughθɹˈuː
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
Andˈænd
I'll
nevernˈɛvɐ
taketˈeɪk
workwˈɜːk
I'm
unableʌnˈeɪbəl
totˈuː
dodə
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myself-said
I
),
Mymˈaɪ
learnedˈlɜːnɪd
professionpɹəfˈɛʃən
I'll
nevernˈɛvɐ
disgracedɪsɡɹˈeɪs
Bybˈaɪ
takingtˈeɪkɪŋ
a
feefˈiː
withwˈɪð
a
grinɡɹˈɪn
onˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
facefˈeɪs
,
Whenwˈɛn
I
haven't
beenbˈiːn
thereðˈeə
totˈuː
attendɐtˈɛnd
totˈuː
theðə
casekˈeɪs
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
!).
I'll never throw dust in a juryman's eyes
LORD CHANCELLOR
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
Orˈɔː
hoodwinkhˈʊdwɪŋk
a
judgedʒˈʌdʒ
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
over-wise
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
Orˈɔː
assumeɐsˈuːm
thatðˈæt
theðə
witnesseswˈɪtnəsɪz
summonedsˈʌmənd
inˈɪn
forcefˈɔːs
Inˈɪn
Exchequerɛkstʃˈɛkɐ
,
Queen's
Benchbˈɛntʃ
,
Commonkˈɒmən
Pleasplˈiːz
,
orˈɔː
Divorcedɪvˈɔːs
,
Havehəv
perjuredpˈɜːdʒjɔːd
themselvesðɛmsˈɛlvz
asəz
a
mattermˈætɐ
ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
!).
Inˈɪn
otherˈʌðɐ
professionspɹəfˈɛʃənz
inˈɪn
whichwˈɪtʃ
menmˈɛn
engageɛnɡˈeɪdʒ
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
saidsˈɛd
I
),
Theðə
Armyˈɑːmi
,
theðə
Navynˈeɪvi
,
theðə
Churchtʃˈɜːtʃ
,
andˈænd
theðə
Stagestˈeɪdʒ
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
),
Professionalpɹəfˈɛʃənəl
licencelˈaɪsəns
,
ifˈɪf
carriedkˈæɹɪd
tootˈuː
farfˈɑː
,
Yourjˈɔː
chancetʃˈɑːns
ofˈɒv
promotionpɹəmˈəʊʃən
willwˈɪl
certainlysˈɜːtənli
marmˈɑː
—
Andˈænd
I
fancyfˈænsi
theðə
ruleɹˈuːl
mightmˈaɪt
applyəˈplaɪ
totˈuː
theðə
Barbˈɑː
(
Saidsˈɛd
I
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
saidsˈɛd
I
!).
(Exit Lord
LORD CHANCELLOR
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
)
Enter Iolanthe
STREPHON
Ohˈəʊ
,
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
,
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Totˈuː
bebˈiː
takentˈeɪkən
fromfɹˈɒm
youjˈuː
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
I
waswˈɒz
onˈɒn
theðə
pointpˈɔɪnt
ofˈɒv
makingmˈeɪkɪŋ
youjˈuː
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
it's
tootˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
—
it's
tootˈuː
muchmˈʌtʃ
!
IOLANTHE
(
totˈuː
Strephon
,
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
).
Mymˈaɪ
sonsˈʌn
inˈɪn
tearstɪɹz
—
andˈænd
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
!
STREPHON
Mymˈaɪ
weddingwˈɛdɪŋ
daydˈeɪ
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
motherˈmʌðə
,
weepwˈiːp
withwˈɪð
memˈiː
,
forfˈɔː
theðə
Lawlˈɔː
hashˈæz
interposedˌɪntəpˈəʊzd
betweenbɪtwˈiːn
usˈʌs
,
andˈænd
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
hashˈæz
separatedsˈɛpəɹˌeɪtɪd
usˈʌs
forfˈɔː
everˈɛvɐ
!
IOLANTHE
Theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
!
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
diddˈɪd
butbˈʌt
knownˈəʊ
!
STREPHON
(
overhearingˌəʊvəhˈiəɹɪŋ
herhˈɜː
).
Ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
diddˈɪd
butbˈʌt
knownˈəʊ
whatwˈɒt
?
IOLANTHE
Nonəʊ
mattermˈætɐ
!
Theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
hashˈæz
nonəʊ
powerpˈaʊɐ
overˈəʊvɐ
youjˈuː
.
Rememberɹɪmˈɛmbɐ
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
halfhˈɑːf
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
.
Youjˈuː
cankˈæn
defydɪfˈaɪ
himhˈɪm
—
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
.
STREPHON
Yesjˈɛs
,
butbˈʌt
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
waistwˈeɪst
downwardsdˈaʊnwədz
heˈhiː
cankˈæn
commitkəmˈɪt
memˈiː
totˈuː
prisonpɹˈɪzən
forfˈɔː
yearsjˈiəz
!
Ofˈɒv
whatwˈɒt
availɐvˈeɪl
isˈɪz
itˈɪt
thatðˈæt
mymˈaɪ
bodybˈɒdi
isˈɪz
freefɹˈiː
,
ifˈɪf
mymˈaɪ
legslˈɛɡz
areə(ɹ)
workingwˈɜːkɪŋ
outˈaʊt
sevensˈɛvən
years'
penalpˈiːnəl
servitudesˈɜːvɪtjˌuːd
?
IOLANTHE
Truetɹˈuː
.
Butbˈʌt
taketˈeɪk
hearthˈɑːt
—
ourˈaʊə
Queenkwˈiːn
hashˈæz
promisedpɹˈɒmɪsd
youjˈuː
herhˈɜː
specialspˈɛʃəl
protectionpɹətˈɛkʃən
.
I'll
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
herhˈɜː
andˈænd
laylˈeɪ
yourjˈɔː
peculiarpɪkjˈuːliə
casekˈeɪs
beforebɪfˈɔː
herhˈɜː
.
STREPHON
Mymˈaɪ
belovedbɪˈlʌvd
motherˈmʌðə
!
howhˈaʊ
cankˈæn
I
repayɹɪpˈeɪ
theðə
debtdˈɛt
I
oweˈəʊ
youjˈuː
?
FINALE—QUARTET
(
Asəz
itˈɪt
commenceskəmˈɛnsɪz
,
theðə
Peerspɪɹz
appearɐpˈiə
atˈæt
theðə
backbˈæk
,
advancingɐdvˈænsɪŋ
unseenʌnsˈiːn
andˈænd
onˈɒn
tiptoetˈɪptəʊ
.
Lordlˈɔːd
Mountararat
andˈænd
Lordlˈɔːd
Tolloller
leadlɛd
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
betweenbɪtwˈiːn
themðˈɛm
,
whohˈuː
listenslˈɪsənz
inˈɪn
horrorhˈɒɹɐ
totˈuː
whatwˈɒt
sheʃˈiː
hearshˈiəz
)
STREPHON
(
totˈuː
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
).
Whenwˈɛn
darklydˈɑːkli
loomslˈuːmz
theðə
daydˈeɪ
,
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
dulldˈʌl
andˈænd
greyɡɹˈeɪ
,
Totˈuː
chasetʃˈeɪs
theðə
gloomɡlˈuːm
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
Onˈɒn
theeðˈiː
I'll
callkˈɔːl
!
(speaking aside to Lord Mountararat).
PHYLLIS
Whatwˈɒt
waswˈɒz
thatðˈæt
?
(aside to Phyllis).
LORD MOUNTARARAT
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
I
heardhˈɜːd
himhˈɪm
saysˈeɪ
,
Thatðˈæt
onˈɒn
a
rainyɹˈeɪni
daydˈeɪ
,
Totˈuː
whilewˈaɪl
theðə
timetˈaɪm
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
Onˈɒn
herhˈɜː
he'd
callkˈɔːl
!
CHORUS
Wewˈiː
thinkθˈɪŋk
wewˈiː
heardhˈɜːd
himhˈɪm
saysˈeɪ
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Phyllis much agitated at her lover's supposed faithlessness
IOLANTHE
(
totˈuː
Strephon
).
Whenwˈɛn
tempeststˈɛmpəsts
wreckɹˈɛk
thyðˈaɪ
barkbˈɑːk
,
Andˈænd
allˈɔːl
isˈɪz
dreardɹˈiə
andˈænd
darkdˈɑːk
,
Ifˈɪf
thouðaʊ
shouldstʃˈʊdst
neednˈiːd
anˈɐn
Arkˈɑːk
,
I'll
giveɡˈɪv
theeðˈiː
onewˈɒn
!
(speaking aside to Lord Tolloller).
PHYLLIS
Whatwˈɒt
waswˈɒz
thatðˈæt
?
(aside to Phyllis).
LORD TOLL.
I
heardhˈɜːd
theðə
minxmˈɪŋks
remarkɹɪˈmɑɹk
,
She'd
meetmˈiːt
himhˈɪm
afterˈɑːftɐ
darkdˈɑːk
,
Insideˈɪnsaɪd
Stseɪnt
James's
Parkpˈɑːk
,
Andˈænd
giveɡˈɪv
himhˈɪm
onewˈɒn
!
CHORUS
Wewˈiː
heardhˈɜːd
theðə
minxmˈɪŋks
remarkɹɪˈmɑɹk
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
PHYLLIS
Theðə
prospect's
veryvˈɛɹi
badbˈæd
.
Mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
sosˈəʊ
soresˈɔː
andˈænd
sadsˈæd
Willwˈɪl
nevernˈɛvɐ
moremˈɔː
bebˈiː
gladɡlˈæd
Asəz
summer's
sunsˈʌn
.
STREPHON
Theðə
prospect's
notnˈɒt
sosˈəʊ
badbˈæd
,
Mymˈaɪ
/
Thyðˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
sosˈəʊ
soresˈɔː
andˈænd
sadsˈæd
Maymˈeɪ
veryvˈɛɹi
soonsˈuːn
bebˈiː
gladɡlˈæd
Asəz
summer's
sunsˈʌn
;
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Forfˈɔː
whenwˈɛn
theðə
skyskˈaɪ
isˈɪz
darkdˈɑːk
Andˈænd
tempeststˈɛmpəsts
wreckɹˈɛk
hishˈɪz
/
thyðˈaɪ
/
mymˈaɪ
barkbˈɑːk
,
heˈhiː
shouldʃˈʊd
Ifˈɪf
thouðaʊ
shouldstʃˈʊdst
neednˈiːd
anˈɐn
Arkˈɑːk
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
She'll
himhˈɪm
I'll
giveɡˈɪv
theeðˈiː
onewˈɒn
!
memˈiː
PHYLLIS
(
revealingɹɪvˈiːlɪŋ
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
).
Ahˈɑː
!
Iolanthe and Strephon much confused
PHYLLIS
Ohˈəʊ
,
shamelessʃˈeɪmləs
onewˈɒn
,
trembletɹˈɛmbəl
!
Naynˈeɪ
,
dodə
notnˈɒt
endeavourɛndˈɛvɐ
Thyðˈaɪ
faultfˈɒlt
totˈuː
dissembledɪsˈɛmbəl
,
Wewˈiː
partpˈɑːt
—
andˈænd
forfˈɔː
everˈɛvɐ
!
I
worshippedwˈɜːʃɪpt
himhˈɪm
blindlyblˈaɪndli
,
Heˈhiː
worshipswˈɜːʃɪps
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
—
STREPHON
Attendɐtˈɛnd
totˈuː
memˈiː
kindlykˈaɪndli
,
Thisðˈɪs
lady's
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
!
TOLL.
Thisðˈɪs
lady's
hishˈɪz
whatwˈɒt
?
STREPHON
Thisðˈɪs
lady's
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
!
TENORS
Thisðˈɪs
lady's
hishˈɪz
whatwˈɒt
?
BASSES
Heˈhiː
sayssˈɛz
she's
hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
!
(They point derisively to Iolanthe, laughing heartily at her.
BASSES
Sheʃˈiː
goesɡˈəʊz
forfˈɔː
protectionpɹətˈɛkʃən
totˈuː
Strephon
)
(Enter Lord Chancellor.
BASSES
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
veilsvˈeɪlz
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
)
LORD CH.
Whatwˈɒt
meansmˈiːnz
thisðˈɪs
mirthmˈɜːθ
unseemlyʌnsˈiːmli
,
Thatðˈæt
shakesʃˈeɪks
theðə
listeninglˈɪsənɪŋ
earthˈɜːθ
?
LORD TOLL.
Theðə
jokedʒˈəʊk
isˈɪz
goodɡˈʊd
extremelyɛkstɹˈiːmli
,
Andˈænd
justifiesdʒˈʌstɪfˌaɪz
ourˈaʊə
mirthmˈɜːθ
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Thisðˈɪs
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
isˈɪz
seensˈiːn
,
Withwˈɪð
a
maidmˈeɪd
ofˈɒv
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
,
A-taking
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
dolcedˈɒltʃeɪ
farfˈɑː
nienteniˈɛn.teɪ
;
Andˈænd
wonderswˈʌndəz
he'd
achieveɐtʃˈiːv
,
Forfˈɔː
heˈhiː
asksˈɑːsks
usˈʌs
totˈuː
believebɪlˈiːv
She's
hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
—
andˈænd
he's
nearlynˈiəli
five-and-twenty
!
LORD CH.
(
sternlystˈɜːnli
).
Recollectɹɛkəˈlɛkt
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
,
I
praypɹˈeɪ
,
Andˈænd
bebˈiː
carefulkˈeəfəl
whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
saysˈeɪ
—
Asəz
theðə
ancientˈeɪnʃənt
Romansˈɹəʊmənz
saidsˈɛd
,
festina
lenteˈlɛn.teɪ
.
Forfˈɔː
I
reallyɹˈiəli
dodə
notnˈɒt
seesˈiː
Howhˈaʊ
sosˈəʊ
youngjˈʌŋ
a
girlɡˈɜːl
couldkˈʊd
bebˈiː
Theðə
motherˈmʌðə
ofˈɒv
a
manmˈæn
ofˈɒv
five-and-twenty
.
ALL
Hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
hahˈɑː
!
STREPHON
Mymˈaɪ
Lordlˈɔːd
,
ofˈɒv
evidenceˈɛvɪdəns
I
havehəv
nonəʊ
dearthdˈɜːθ
—
Sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
—
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
—
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
fromfɹˈɒm
mymˈaɪ
birthbˈɜːθ
!
ALL
Inˈɪn
babyhoodbˈeɪbɪhˌʊd
Uponəpˈɒn
herhˈɜː
laplˈæp
I
laylˈeɪ
,
Withwˈɪð
infantˈɪnfənt
foodfˈuːd
Sheʃˈiː
moistenedmˈɔɪstənd
mymˈaɪ
clayklˈeɪ
;
Hadhˈæd
sheʃˈiː
withheldwɪðhˈɛld
Theðə
succoursəkˈɜː
sheʃˈiː
suppliedsəplˈaɪd
,
Bybˈaɪ
hungerhˈʌŋɡɐ
quelledkwˈɛld
,
Yourjˈɔː
Strephon
mightmˈaɪt
havehəv
dieddˈaɪd
!
LORD CH.
(
muchmˈʌtʃ
movedmˈuːvd
).
Hadhˈæd
thatðˈæt
refreshmentɹɪfɹˈɛʃmənt
beenbˈiːn
denieddɪnˈaɪd
,
Indeedˌɪndˈiːd
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
mightmˈaɪt
havehəv
dieddˈaɪd
!
ALLˈɔːl
(
muchmˈʌtʃ
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
).
Hadhˈæd
thatðˈæt
refreshmentɹɪfɹˈɛʃmənt
beenbˈiːn
denieddɪnˈaɪd
,
Indeedˌɪndˈiːd
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
mightmˈaɪt
havehəv
dieddˈaɪd
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Butbˈʌt
asəz
she's
notnˈɒt
Hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
,
itˈɪt
appearsɐpˈiəz
,
Why weep these hot
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Unnecessaryʌnnˈɛsəsəɹi
tearstɪɹz
?
Andˈænd
bybˈaɪ
whatwˈɒt
lawslˈɔːz
Shouldʃˈʊd
wewˈiː
sosˈəʊ
joyouslydʒˈɔɪəsli
Rejoiceɹɪdʒˈɔɪs
,
becausebɪkˈʌz
Ourˈaʊə
Strephon
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
diedˈaɪ
?
Ohˈəʊ
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
pipepˈaɪp
ourˈaʊə
eyeˈaɪ
Becausebɪkˈʌz
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
diedˈaɪ
!
ALL
That's
veryvˈɛɹi
truetɹˈuː
—
let's
pipepˈaɪp
ourˈaʊə
eyeˈaɪ
Becausebɪkˈʌz
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
diddˈɪd
notnˈɒt
diedˈaɪ
!
(All weep.
Iolanthe, who has succeeded in hiding her face from
Lord Chancellor, escapes unnoticed)
PHYLLIS
Goɡˈəʊ
,
traitoroustɹˈeɪtəɹəs
onewˈɒn
—
forfˈɔː
everˈɛvɐ
wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
partpˈɑːt
:
Totˈuː
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
I
giveɡˈɪv
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
!
ALL
Ohˈəʊ
,
raptureɹˈæptʃɐ
!
Hear me, Phyllis, ere you leave me.
PHYLLIS
Notnˈɒt
a
wordwˈɜːd
—
youjˈuː
diddˈɪd
deceivedɪsˈiːv
memˈiː
.
ALL
Notnˈɒt
a
wordwˈɜːd
—
youjˈuː
diddˈɪd
deceivedɪsˈiːv
herhˈɜː
.
(Exit
ALL
Strephon
)
Forfˈɔː
richesɹˈɪtʃɪz
andˈænd
rankɹˈæŋk
I
dodə
notnˈɒt
longlˈɒŋ
—
Theirðˈeə
pleasuresplˈɛʒəz
areə(ɹ)
falsefˈɒls
andˈænd
vainvˈeɪn
;
I
gaveɡˈeɪv
upˈʌp
theðə
lovelˈʌv
ofˈɒv
a
lordlylˈɔːdli
throngθɹˈɒŋ
Forfˈɔː
theðə
lovelˈʌv
ofˈɒv
a
simplesˈɪmpəl
swainswˈeɪn
.
Butbˈʌt
nownˈaʊ
thatðˈæt
simplesˈɪmpəl
swain's
untrueʌntɹˈuː
,
With sorrowful heart I turn to you—
ALL
A
hearthˈɑːt
that's
achingˈeɪkɪŋ
,
Quakingkwˈeɪkɪŋ
,
breakingbɹˈeɪkɪŋ
,
Asəz
sorrowfulsˈɒɹəʊfəl
heartshˈɑːts
areə(ɹ)
wontwˈɒnt
totˈuː
dodə
!
Theðə
richesɹˈɪtʃɪz
andˈænd
rankɹˈæŋk
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
befallbɪfˈɔːl
Areə(ɹ)
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
baitsbˈeɪts
youjˈuː
usejuːs
,
Sosˈəʊ
theðə
richestɹˈɪtʃəst
andˈænd
rankiest
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
allˈɔːl
Mymˈaɪ
sorrowfulsˈɒɹəʊfəl
hearthˈɑːt
shallʃˈæl
choosetʃˈuːz
.
Asəz
nonenʌn
areə(ɹ)
sosˈəʊ
noblenˈəʊbəl
—
nonenʌn
sosˈəʊ
richɹˈɪtʃ
Asəz
thisðˈɪs
couplekˈʌpəl
ofˈɒv
lordslˈɔːdz
,
I'll
findfˈaɪnd
a
nichenˈiːʃ
Inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
that's
achingˈeɪkɪŋ
,
Quakingkwˈeɪkɪŋ
,
breakingbɹˈeɪkɪŋ
,
Forfˈɔː
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
two-and
I
don't
carekˈeə
whichwˈɪtʃ
!
PHYLLIS
(
totˈuː
Lordlˈɔːd
Mountararat
andˈænd
Lordlˈɔːd
Tolloller
).
Totˈuː
youjˈuː
I
giveɡˈɪv
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
sosˈəʊ
richɹˈɪtʃ
!
ALLˈɔːl
(
puzzledpˈʌzəld
).
Totˈuː
whichwˈɪtʃ
?
I
dodə
notnˈɒt
carekˈeə
!
Totˈuː
youjˈuː
I
yieldjˈiːld
—
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
mymˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
!
ALL
Totˈuː
whomhˈuːm
?
PHYLLIS
I'm
notnˈɒt
awareɐwˈeə
!
I'm
yoursjˈɔːz
forfˈɔː
lifelˈaɪf
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
butbˈʌt
choosetʃˈuːz
.
ALL
She's
whosehˈuːz
?
PHYLLIS
That's
yourjˈɔː
affairɐfˈeə
!
I'll
bebˈiː
a
countesskˈaʊntɛs
,
shallʃˈæl
I
notnˈɒt
?
ALL
Ofˈɒv
whatwˈɒt
?
PHYLLIS
I
dodə
notnˈɒt
carekˈeə
!
ALL
Luckylˈʌki
littlelˈɪtəl
ladylˈeɪdi
!
Strephon's
lotlˈɒt
isˈɪz
shadyʃˈeɪdi
;
Rankɹˈæŋk
,
itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
,
isˈɪz
vitalvˈaɪtəl
,
"
Countesskˈaʊntɛs
"
isˈɪz
theðə
titletˈaɪtəl
,
Butbˈʌt
ofˈɒv
whatwˈɒt
I'm
notnˈɒt
awareɐwˈeə
!
Enter Strephon
STREPHON
Cankˈæn
I
inactiveɪnˈæktɪv
seesˈiː
mymˈaɪ
fortunefˈɔːtʃuːn
fadefˈeɪd
?
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
!
PEERS
Hohˈəʊ
,
hohˈəʊ
!
STREPHON
Mightymˈaɪti
protectresspɹəˈtɛktɹɪs
,
hastenhˈeɪstən
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
aidˈeɪd
!
(Enter Fairies, tripping, headed by Celia, Leila, and Fleta, and
STREPHON
followedfˈɒləʊd
bybˈaɪ
Queenkwˈiːn
)
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
Trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
hitherhˈɪðɐ
,
trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
thitherðˈɪðɐ
.
OFˈɒv
Nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
knowsnˈəʊz
whywˈaɪ
orˈɔː
whitherwˈɪðɐ
;
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
Whywˈaɪ
youjˈuː
wantwˈɒnt
usˈʌs
wewˈiː
don't
knownˈəʊ
,
Butbˈʌt
you've
summonedsˈʌmənd
usˈʌs
,
andˈænd
sosˈəʊ
Enter all the little fairies
STREPHON
Totˈuː
theirðˈeə
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
trippingtɹˈɪpɪŋ
measuremˈɛʒɐ
!
Totˈuː
obligeəblˈaɪdʒ
youjˈuː
allˈɔːl
ourˈaʊə
carekˈeə
isˈɪz
—
Telltˈɛl
usˈʌs
,
praypɹˈeɪ
,
whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
yourjˈɔː
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
!
Theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
lovelˈʌv
hashˈæz
caughtkˈɔːt
memˈiː
talkingtˈɔːkɪŋ
totˈuː
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
—
PEERS
Ohˈəʊ
,
fiefˈaɪ
!
youngjˈʌŋ
Strephon
isˈɪz
a
rogueɹˈəʊɡ
!
STREPHON
I
telltˈɛl
herhˈɜː
veryvˈɛɹi
plainlyplˈeɪnli
thatðˈæt
theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
isˈɪz
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
—
PEERS
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
STREPHON
Sheʃˈiː
won't
believebɪlˈiːv
mymˈaɪ
statementstˈeɪtmənt
,
andˈænd
declaresdɪklˈeəz
wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
partedpˈɑːtɪd
,
Becausebɪkˈʌz
onˈɒn
a
careerkəɹˈiə
ofˈɒv
double-dealingˌdʌbəlˈdiːlɪŋ
I
havehəv
startedstˈɑːtɪd
,
Then gives her hand to one of these, and leaves me
STREPHON
broken-hearted
—
PEERS
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
QUEEN
Ahˈɑː
,
cruelkɹˈuːəl
oneswˈɒnz
,
totˈuː
separateˈsɛp.(ə.)ɹət
twotˈuː
loverslˈʌvəz
fromfɹˈɒm
eachˈiːtʃ
otherˈʌðɐ
!
FAIRIES
Ohˈəʊ
,
fiefˈaɪ
!
ourˈaʊə
Strephon's
notnˈɒt
a
rogueɹˈəʊɡ
!
QUEEN
You've
donedˈʌn
himhˈɪm
anˈɐn
injusticeɪndʒˈʌstɪs
,
forfˈɔː
theðə
ladylˈeɪdi
isˈɪz
hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
!
FAIRIES
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
That fable perhaps may serve his turn as well as any
LORD CH.
otherˈʌðɐ
.
(Aside) I didn't see her face, but if they fondled one
LORD CH.
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
,
Andˈænd
she's
butbˈʌt
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
—
I
don't
believebɪlˈiːv
itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
!
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
.
ALL
Tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
LORD TOLL.
I
havehəv
oftenˈɒfən
hadhˈæd
a
usejuːs
Forfˈɔː
a
thorough-bred
excuseɪkˈskjuːz
Ofˈɒv
a
suddensˈʌdən
(
whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
Englishˈɪŋɡlɪʃ
forfˈɔː
"
repente
"),
Butbˈʌt
ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
I
everˈɛvɐ
heardhˈɜːd
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
muchmˈʌtʃ
theðə
mostmˈəʊst
absurdɐbsˈɜːd
,
Forfˈɔː
she's
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
five-and-twenty
!
ALL
Thoughðˈəʊ
sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
fourfˈɔː
orˈɔː
five-and-twenty
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
fiefˈaɪ
!
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
isˈɪz
a
rogueɹˈəʊɡ
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Nownˈaʊ
,
listenlˈɪsən
,
praypɹˈeɪ
totˈuː
memˈiː
,
Forfˈɔː
thisðˈɪs
paradoxpˈæɹədˌɒks
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
Carriedkˈæɹɪd
,
nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
atˈæt
allˈɔːl
contradicente
.
Herhˈɜː
ageˈeɪdʒ
,
uponəpˈɒn
theðə
datedˈeɪt
Ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
birthbˈɜːθ
,
waswˈɒz
minusmˈaɪnəs
eightˈeɪt
,
Ifˈɪf
she's
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
five-and-twenty
!
PEERSpɪɹz
andˈænd
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
.
Ifˈɪf
sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
seventeensˌɛvəntˈiːn
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
isˈɪz
onlyˈəʊnli
five-and-twenty
.
ALL
Totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
hishˈɪz
motherˈmʌðə
isˈɪz
anˈɐn
utterˈʌtɐ
bitbˈɪt
ofˈɒv
follyfˈɒli
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
fiefˈaɪ
!
ourˈaʊə
Strephon
isˈɪz
a
rogueɹˈəʊɡ
!
Perhapspəhˈæps
hishˈɪz
brainbɹˈeɪn
isˈɪz
addledˈædəld
,
andˈænd
it's
veryvˈɛɹi
melancholymˈɛlənkˌɒli
!
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
I
wouldn't
saysˈeɪ
a
wordwˈɜːd
thatðˈæt
couldkˈʊd
bebˈiː
reckonedɹˈɛkənd
asəz
injuriousɪndʒˈɔːɹɪəs
,
Butbˈʌt
totˈuː
findfˈaɪnd
a
motherˈmʌðə
youngerjˈʌŋɡɐ
thanðˈɐn
herhˈɜː
sonsˈʌn
isˈɪz
veryvˈɛɹi
curiouskjˈʊɹɪəs
,
Andˈænd
that's
a
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
motherˈmʌðə
thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
usuallyjˈuːʒuːəli
spuriousspjˈʊɹɪəs
.
Taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
taradiddleˈtæ.ɹə.dɪ.dəl
,
tol
lolɛl.əʊˈɛl
laylˈeɪ
!
LORD CH.
Goɡˈəʊ
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
;
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
Youjˈuː
displaydɪsplˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
Shockingʃˈɒkɪŋ
tastetˈeɪst
.
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
rudeɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Totˈuː
intrudeɪntɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Withwˈɪð
yourjˈɔː
broodbɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Brazen-facedˈbɹeɪ.zənˌfeɪst
!
Youjˈuː
comekˈʌm
herehˈiə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Interfereˌɪntəfˈiə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Withwˈɪð
a
peerpɪə̯
,
madammˈædəm
.
I am one
LORD CH.
You're
awareɐwˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
daredˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Sosˈəʊ
taketˈeɪk
carekˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Andˈænd
begonebɪɡˈɒn
!
ENSEMBLE
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
(
totˈuː
QUEENkwˈiːn
).
PEERS
Letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
staystˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
;
Goɡˈəʊ
awayɐwˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
;
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
Theyðˈeɪ
displaydɪsplˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
Youjˈuː
displaydɪsplˈeɪ
,
madammˈædəm
,
Shockingʃˈɒkɪŋ
tastetˈeɪst
.
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
rudeɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Itˈɪt
isˈɪz
rudeɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Totˈuː
alludeɐlˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Totˈuː
intrudeɪntɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
broodbɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Withwˈɪð
yourjˈɔː
broodbɹˈuːd
,
madammˈædəm
,
Brazen-facedˈbɹeɪ.zənˌfeɪst
!
Brazen-facedˈbɹeɪ.zənˌfeɪst
!
Wewˈiː
don't
fearfˈiə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Youjˈuː
comekˈʌm
herehˈiə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Anyˈɛni
peerpɪə̯
,
madammˈædəm
,
Interfereˌɪntəfˈiə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
,
mymˈaɪ
deardˈiə
madammˈædəm
,
Withwˈɪð
a
peerpɪə̯
,
madammˈædəm
,
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
onewˈɒn
.
I am one
PEERS
Theyðˈeɪ
willwˈɪl
starestˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
You're
awareɐwˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Whenwˈɛn
awareɐwˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
daredˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Whatwˈɒt
theyðˈeɪ
daredˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
—
Sosˈəʊ
taketˈeɪk
carekˈeə
,
madammˈædəm
,
Whatwˈɒt
they've
donedˈʌn
!
Andˈænd
begonebɪɡˈɒn
!
QUEEN
Beardedbˈiədɪd
bybˈaɪ
theseðˈiːz
punypjˈuːni
mortalsmˈɔːtəlz
!
(
furiousfjˈɔːɹɪəs
).
I
willwˈɪl
launchlˈɔːntʃ
fromfɹˈɒm
fairyfˈeəɹi
portalspˈɔːtəlz
Allˈɔːl
theðə
mostmˈəʊst
terrifictəɹˈɪfɪk
thundersθˈʌndəz
Inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
armouryˈɑːmɜːɹi
ofˈɒv
wonderswˈʌndəz
!
(aside).
PHYLLIS
Shouldʃˈʊd
theyðˈeɪ
launchlˈɔːntʃ
terrifictəɹˈɪfɪk
wonderswˈʌndəz
,
Allˈɔːl
wouldwˈʊd
thenðˈɛn
repentɹɪˈpɛnt
theirðˈeə
blundersblˈʌndəz
.
Surelyʃˈɔːli
theseðˈiːz
mustmˈʌst
bebˈiː
immortalsɪmˈɔːtəlz
.
(Exit
PHYLLIS
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
)
QUEEN
Ohˈəʊ
!
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
unwaryʌnwˈeəɹi
It's
highlyhˈaɪli
necessarynˈɛsəsəɹi
Yourjˈɔː
tonguetˈʌŋ
totˈuː
teachtˈiːtʃ
Respectfulɹɪspˈɛktfəl
speechspˈiːtʃ
—
Yourjˈɔː
attitudeˈætɪtjˌuːd
totˈuː
varyvˈeəɹi
!
Yourjˈɔː
badinagebˈædɪnɪdʒ
sosˈəʊ
airyˈeəɹi
,
Yourjˈɔː
mannermˈænɐ
arbitraryˈɑːbɪtɹəɹi
,
Areə(ɹ)
outˈaʊt
ofˈɒv
placeplˈeɪs
Whenwˈɛn
facefˈeɪs
totˈuː
facefˈeɪs
Withwˈɪð
anˈɐn
influentialˌɪnfluːˈɛnʃəl
Fairyfˈeəɹi
.
ALLˈɔːl
THEðə
PEERSpɪɹz
Wewˈiː
nevernˈɛvɐ
knewnjˈuː
(aside).
QUEEN
Wewˈiː
werewˈɜː
talkingtˈɔːkɪŋ
totˈuː
Anˈɐn
influentialˌɪnfluːˈɛnʃəl
Fairyfˈeəɹi
!
LORD CH.
A
plagueplˈeɪɡ
onˈɒn
thisðˈɪs
vagaryvˈeɪɡəɹˌi
,
I'm
inˈɪn
a
nicenaɪs
quandarykwˈɒndəɹi
!
Ofˈɒv
hastyhˈeɪsti
tonetˈəʊn
Withwˈɪð
damesdˈeɪmz
unknownʌnnˈəʊn
I
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
bebˈiː
moremˈɔː
charyˈt͡ʃɛɹi
;
Itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
thatðˈæt
she's
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
Fromfɹˈɒm
Andersen's
librarylˈaɪbɹəɹi
,
Andˈænd
I
tooktˈʊk
herhˈɜː
forfˈɔː
Theðə
proprietorpɹəpɹˈaɪətɐ
Ofˈɒv
a
Ladies'
Seminarysˈɛmɪnəɹi
!
PEERS
Wewˈiː
tooktˈʊk
herhˈɜː
forfˈɔː
Theðə
proprietorpɹəpɹˈaɪətɐ
Ofˈɒv
a
Ladies'
Seminarysˈɛmɪnəɹi
!
QUEEN
Whenwˈɛn
nextnˈɛkst
yourjˈɔː
Houseshˈaʊzɪz
dodə
assembleɐsˈɛmbəl
,
Youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
trembletɹˈɛmbəl
!
CELIA
Ourˈaʊə
wrathɹˈæθ
,
whenwˈɛn
gentlemendʒˈɛntəlmən
offendəfˈɛnd
usˈʌs
,
Isˈɪz
tremendoustɹəmˈɛndəs
!
LEILA
Theyðˈeɪ
meetmˈiːt
,
whohˈuː
underrateˌʌndəɹˈeɪt
ourˈaʊə
callingkˈɔːlɪŋ
,
Doomdˈuːm
appallingɐpˈɔːlɪŋ
!
QUEEN
Taketˈeɪk
downdˈaʊn
ourˈaʊə
sentencesˈɛntəns
asəz
wewˈiː
speakspˈiːk
itˈɪt
,
Andˈænd
heˈhiː
shallʃˈæl
wreakɹˈiːk
itˈɪt
!
(
Indicatingˈɪndɪkˌeɪtɪŋ
Strephon
)
PEERS
Ohˈəʊ
,
sparespˈeə
usˈʌs
!
QUEEN
Henceforthhˈɛnsfɔːθ
,
Strephon
,
castkˈɑːst
awayɐwˈeɪ
Crookskɹˈʊks
andˈænd
pipespˈaɪps
andˈænd
ribbonsɹˈɪbənz
sosˈəʊ
gayɡˈeɪ
—
Flocksflˈɒks
andˈænd
herdshˈɜːdz
thatðˈæt
bleatblˈiːt
andˈænd
lowlˈəʊ
;
Intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
goɡˈəʊ
!
ALL
Intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
heˈhiː
shallʃˈæl
goɡˈəʊ
!
Backedbˈækt
bybˈaɪ
ourˈaʊə
supremesuːpɹˈiːm
authorityɐθˈɒɹɪtˌi
,
He'll
commandkəmˈɑːnd
a
largelˈɑːdʒ
majoritymədʒˈɒɹɪtˌi
!
Intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
heˈhiː
shallʃˈæl
goɡˈəʊ
!
QUEEN
Inˈɪn
theðə
Parliamentarypˌɑːləmˈɛntəɹi
hivehˈaɪv
,
Liberallˈɪbəɹəl
orˈɔː
Conservativekənsˈɜːvətˌɪv
—
Whigʍɪɡ
orˈɔː
Toryˈtɔː.ɹi
—
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
—
Butbˈʌt
intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
goɡˈəʊ
!
ALL
Intoˈɪntʊ
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
QUEENkwˈiːn
(
speakingspˈiːkɪŋ
throughθɹˈuː
musicmjˈuːzɪk
).
Everyˈɛvɹi
billbˈɪl
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
measuremˈɛʒɐ
Thatðˈæt
maymˈeɪ
gratifyɡɹˈætɪfˌaɪ
hishˈɪz
pleasureplˈɛʒɐ
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
yourjˈɔː
furyfjˈɔːɹi
itˈɪt
arousesɐɹˈaʊzɪz
,
Shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
passedpˈɑːst
bybˈaɪ
bothbˈəʊθ
yourjˈɔː
Houseshˈaʊzɪz
!
PEERS
Ohˈəʊ
!
QUEEN
Youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
sitsˈɪt
,
ifˈɪf
heˈhiː
seessˈiːz
reasonɹˈiːzən
,
Throughθɹˈuː
theðə
grouseɡɹˈaʊs
andˈænd
salmonsˈæmən
seasonsˈiːzən
;
PEERS
Nonəʊ
!
QUEEN
Heˈhiː
shallʃˈæl
endˈɛnd
theðə
cherishedtʃˈɛɹɪʃt
rightsɹˈaɪts
Youjˈuː
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
onˈɒn
Fridayˈfɹaɪ.deɪ
nightsnˈaɪts
:
PEERS
Nonəʊ
!
QUEEN
Heˈhiː
shallʃˈæl
prickpɹˈɪk
thatðˈæt
annualˈænjuːəl
blisterblˈɪstɐ
,
Marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
withwˈɪð
deceaseddɪsˈiːsd
wife's
sistersˈɪstɐ
:
PEERS
Mercymˈɜːsi
!
QUEEN
Titlestˈaɪtəlz
shallʃˈæl
ennobleɪˈnəʊbəl
,
thenðˈɛn
,
Allˈɔːl
theðə
Commonkˈɒmən
Councilmen
:
PEERS
Sparespˈeə
usˈʌs
!
QUEEN
Peerspɪɹz
shallʃˈæl
teemtˈiːm
inˈɪn
Christendomˈkɹɪsn̩dəm
,
Andˈænd
a
Duke's
exaltedɛɡzˈɒltɪd
stationstˈeɪʃən
Bebˈiː
attainableɐtˈeɪnəbəl
bybˈaɪ
Com-ˌkəm
Petitive
Examinationɛɡzˌæmɪnˈeɪʃən
!
PEERS
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
andˈænd
PHYLLISˈfɪlɪs
.
Ohˈəʊ
,
horrorhˈɒɹɐ
!
Theirðˈeə
horrorhˈɒɹɐ
Theyðˈeɪ
can't
dissembledɪsˈɛmbəl
Nor hide the fear that makes them
PEERS
trembletɹˈɛmbəl
!
ENSEMBLE
PEERSpɪɹz
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
,
PHYLLISˈfɪlɪs
,
andˈænd
STREPHON
.
Youngjˈʌŋ
Strephon
isˈɪz
theðə
kindkˈaɪnd
ofˈɒv
loutlˈaʊt
Withwˈɪð
Strephon
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
foefˈəʊ
,
nonəʊ
doubtdˈaʊt
,
Wewˈiː
dodə
notnˈɒt
carekˈeə
a
figfˈɪɡ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
!
A
fearfulfˈiəfəl
prospectˈpɹɒspɛkt
opensˈəʊpənz
outˈaʊt
,
Wewˈiː
cannotˈkænɒt
saysˈeɪ
Andˈænd
whohˈuː
shallʃˈæl
saysˈeɪ
Whatwˈɒt
evilsˈiːvəlz
maymˈeɪ
Whatwˈɒt
evilsˈiːvəlz
maymˈeɪ
Resultɹɪzˈʌlt
inˈɪn
consequencekˈɒnsɪkwəns
.
Resultɹɪzˈʌlt
inˈɪn
consequencekˈɒnsɪkwəns
?
Butbˈʌt
lordlylˈɔːdli
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
willwˈɪl
pursuepəsjˈuː
A
hideoushˈɪdiəs
vengeancevˈɛndʒəns
willwˈɪl
pursuepəsjˈuː
Allˈɔːl
kindskˈaɪndz
ofˈɒv
commonkˈɒmən
peoplepˈiːpəl
whohˈuː
Allˈɔːl
noblemennˈəʊbəlmˌɛn
whohˈuː
venturevˈɛntʃɐ
totˈuː
Opposeəpˈəʊz
ourˈaʊə
viewsvjˈuːz
,
Opppose
hishˈɪz
viewsvjˈuːz
,
Orˈɔː
boldlybˈəʊldli
choosetʃˈuːz
Orˈɔː
boldlybˈəʊldli
choosetʃˈuːz
Totˈuː
offerˈɒfɐ
usˈʌs
offenceəˈfɛns
.
Totˈuː
offerˈɒfɐ
himhˈɪm
offenceəˈfɛns
.
He'd
betterbˈɛtɐ
flyflˈaɪ
atˈæt
humblerhˈʌmblɐ
gameɡˈeɪm
,
'Twill
plungeplˈʌndʒ
themðˈɛm
intoˈɪntʊ
griefɡɹˈiːf
andˈænd
shameʃˈeɪm
;
Orˈɔː
ourˈaʊə
forbearancefˈɔːbeəɹəns
heˈhiː
mustmˈʌst
claimklˈeɪm
,
Hishˈɪz
kindkˈaɪnd
forbearancefˈɔːbeəɹəns
theyðˈeɪ
mustmˈʌst
claimklˈeɪm
,
If he'd escape If they'd escape
ENSEMBLE
Inˈɪn
anyˈɛni
shapeʃˈeɪp
Inˈɪn
anyˈɛni
shapeʃˈeɪp
A
veryvˈɛɹi
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
wrenchɹˈɛntʃ
!
A
veryvˈɛɹi
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
wrenchɹˈɛntʃ
.
Yourjˈɔː
powerspˈaʊəz
wewˈiː
dauntlessly
pooh-poohˌpuːˈpuː
:
Althoughɒlðˈəʊ
ourˈaʊə
threatsθɹˈɛts
youjˈuː
nownˈaʊ
pooh-poohˌpuːˈpuː
,
A dire revenge will fall on you.
A dire revenge will fall on you,
ENSEMBLE
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
besiegebɪsˈiːdʒ
Shouldʃˈʊd
heˈhiː
besiegebɪsˈiːdʒ
Ourˈaʊə
highhˈaɪ
prestigepɹɛstˈiːʒ
—
Yourjˈɔː
highhˈaɪ
prestigepɹɛstˈiːʒ
—
(
Theðə
wordwˈɜːd
"
prestigepɹɛstˈiːʒ
"
isˈɪz
Frenchfɹˈɛntʃ
).
Theðə
wordwˈɜːd
"
prestigepɹɛstˈiːʒ
"
isˈɪz
Frenchfɹˈɛntʃ
).
PEERS
Ourˈaʊə
lordlylˈɔːdli
stylestˈaɪl
Youjˈuː
shallʃˈæl
notnˈɒt
quenchkwˈɛntʃ
Withwˈɪð
basebˈeɪs
canaillekəˈnaɪ
!
That word is French
PEERS
Distinctiondɪstˈɪŋkʃən
ebbsˈɛbz
Beforebɪfˈɔː
a
herdhˈɜːd
Ofˈɒv
vulgarvˈʌlɡɐ
plebsplˈɛbz
!
A Latin word
PEERS
'Twould
fillfˈɪl
withwˈɪð
joydʒˈɔɪ
,
Andˈænd
madnessmˈædnəs
starkstˈɑːk
Theðə
hoihɔɪ
polloiˈhɔɪ pəˌlɔɪ
!
A Greek remark
PEERS
Onewˈɒn
Latinˈlæt.ɪn
wordwˈɜːd
,
onewˈɒn
Greekɡɹiːk
remarkɹɪˈmɑɹk
,
Andˈænd
onewˈɒn
that's
Frenchfɹˈɛntʃ
.
FAIRIES
Yourjˈɔː
lordlylˈɔːdli
stylestˈaɪl
We'll
quicklykwˈɪkli
quenchkwˈɛntʃ
Withwˈɪð
basebˈeɪs
canaillekəˈnaɪ
!
That word is French
FAIRIES
Distinctiondɪstˈɪŋkʃən
ebbsˈɛbz
Beforebɪfˈɔː
a
herdhˈɜːd
Ofˈɒv
vulgarvˈʌlɡɐ
plebsplˈɛbz
!
A Latin word
FAIRIES
'Twill
fillfˈɪl
withwˈɪð
joydʒˈɔɪ
Andˈænd
madnessmˈædnəs
starkstˈɑːk
Theðə
hoihɔɪ
polloiˈhɔɪ pəˌlɔɪ
!
A Greek remark
FAIRIES
Onewˈɒn
Latinˈlæt.ɪn
wordwˈɜːd
,
onewˈɒn
Greekɡɹiːk
remarkɹɪˈmɑɹk
,
Andˈænd
onewˈɒn
that's
Frenchfɹˈɛntʃ
.
Youjˈuː
needn't
waitwˈeɪt
:
Wewˈiː
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
waitwˈeɪt
:
Awayɐwˈeɪ
youjˈuː
flyflˈaɪ
!
Wewˈiː
goɡˈəʊ
sky-high
!
Yourjˈɔː
threatenedθɹˈɛtənd
hatehˈeɪt
Ourˈaʊə
threatenedθɹˈɛtənd
hatehˈeɪt
Wewˈiː
won't
defydɪfˈaɪ
!
Youjˈuː
won't
defydɪfˈaɪ
!
(
Fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
threatenθɹˈɛtən
Peerspɪɹz
withwˈɪð
theirðˈeə
wandswˈɒndz
.
Peers kneel as begging
FAIRIES
forfˈɔː
merrymˈɛɹi
.
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
imploresɪmplˈɔːz
Strephon
totˈuː
relentɹɪlˈɛnt
.
Heˈhiː
castskˈɑːsts
herhˈɜː
fromfɹˈɒm
him, and she falls fainting into the arms of Lord Mountararat and
FAIRIES
Lordlˈɔːd
Tolloller
)
ACT II
Scene.
END OF ACT I
—
Palacepˈælɪs
Yardjˈɑːd
,
Westminsterˈwɛs(t)ˌmɪnstə
.
Westminsterˈwɛs(t)ˌmɪnstə
Hallhˈɔːl
,
L
.
Clockklˈɒk
towerˈtaʊ.ə(ɹ)
upˈʌp
,
R
.
C
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Willisˈwɪlɪs
discovereddɪskˈʌvəd
onˈɒn
sentrysˈɛntɹi
,
R
.
Moonlightmˈuːnlaɪt
.
PRIVATE WILLIS
Whenwˈɛn
allˈɔːl
nightnˈaɪt
longlˈɒŋ
a
chaptʃˈæp
remainsɹɪmˈeɪnz
Onˈɒn
sentry-go
,
totˈuː
chasetʃˈeɪs
monotonymənˈɒtəni
Heˈhiː
exercisesˈɛksəsˌaɪzɪz
ofˈɒv
hishˈɪz
brainsbɹˈeɪnz
,
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
,
assumingɐsˈuːmɪŋ
thatðˈæt
he's
gotɡˈɒt
anyˈɛni
.
Thoughðˈəʊ
nevernˈɛvɐ
nurturednˈɜːtʃəd
inˈɪn
theðə
laplˈæp
Ofˈɒv
luxurylˈʌkʃəɹˌi
,
yetjˈɛt
I
admonishɐdmˈɒnɪʃ
youjˈuː
,
I
aməm
anˈɐn
intellectualˌɪntəlˈɛktʃuːəl
chaptʃˈæp
,
Andˈænd
thinkθˈɪŋk
ofˈɒv
thingsθˈɪŋz
thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
astonishɐstˈɒnɪʃ
youjˈuː
.
I
oftenˈɒfən
thinkθˈɪŋk
it's
comicalkˈɒmɪkəl
—
Fal
,
lal
,
lalˈæ
!
Howhˈaʊ
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
doesdəz
contrivekəntɹˈaɪv
—
Fal
,
lal
,
lalˈæ
!
Thatðˈæt
everyˈɛvɹi
boybˈɔɪ
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
galɡˈæl
That's
bornbˈɔːn
intoˈɪntʊ
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
aliveɐlˈaɪv
Isˈɪz
eitherˈaɪðɐ
a
littlelˈɪtəl
Liberallˈɪbəɹəl
Orˈɔː
elseˈɛls
a
littlelˈɪtəl
Conservativekənsˈɜːvətˌɪv
!
Fal
,
lal
,
lalˈæ
!
Whenwˈɛn
inˈɪn
thatðˈæt
Househaʊs
M
.
P
's
dividedɪvˈaɪd
,
Ifˈɪf
they've
a
brainbɹˈeɪn
andˈænd
cerebellumsˌɛɹɪbˈɛləm
,
tootˈuː
,
They've got to leave that brain outside,
P
Andˈænd
votevˈəʊt
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
theirðˈeə
leaderslˈiːdəz
telltˈɛl
'em
totˈuː
.
Butbˈʌt
thenðˈɛn
theðə
prospectˈpɹɒspɛkt
ofˈɒv
a
lotlˈɒt
Ofˈɒv
dulldˈʌl
M
.
's
inˈɪn
closekləʊz
proximitypɹɒksˈɪmɪti
,
Allˈɔːl
thinkingθˈɪŋkɪŋ
forfˈɔː
themselvesðɛmsˈɛlvz
,
isˈɪz
whatwˈɒt
Nonəʊ
manmˈæn
cankˈæn
facefˈeɪs
withwˈɪð
equanimityˌiːkwɐnˈɪmɪti
.
Thenðˈɛn
let's
rejoiceɹɪdʒˈɔɪs
withwˈɪð
loudlˈaʊd
Fal
lalˈæ
—
Fal
lalˈæ
lalˈæ
!
Thatðˈæt
Naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
alwaysˈɔːlweɪz
doesdəz
contrivekəntɹˈaɪv
—
Fal
lal
lalˈæ
!
Thatðˈæt
everyˈɛvɹi
boybˈɔɪ
andˈænd
everyˈɛvɹi
galɡˈæl
That's
bornbˈɔːn
intoˈɪntʊ
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
aliveɐlˈaɪv
Isˈɪz
eitherˈaɪðɐ
a
littlelˈɪtəl
Liberallˈɪbəɹəl
Orˈɔː
elseˈɛls
a
littlelˈɪtəl
Conservativekənsˈɜːvətˌɪv
!
Fal
lal
lalˈæ
!
(Enter Fairies, with Celia, Leila, and Fleta.
P
Theyðˈeɪ
triptɹˈɪp
roundɹˈaʊnd
stagestˈeɪdʒ
)
CHORUS OF FAIRIES
Strephon's
a
Membermˈɛmbɐ
ofˈɒv
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
!
Carrieskˈæɹɪz
everyˈɛvɹi
Billbˈɪl
heˈhiː
choosestʃˈuːzɪz
.
Totˈuː
hishˈɪz
measuresmˈɛʒəz
allˈɔːl
assentɐsˈɛnt
—
Showingʃˈəʊɪŋ
thatðˈæt
fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
havehəv
theirðˈeə
usesˈjuː.sɪz
.
Whigsʍɪɡ
andˈænd
Toriesˈtɔː.ɹi
Dimdˈɪm
theirðˈeə
gloriesɡlˈɔːɹɪz
,
Givingɡˈɪvɪŋ
anˈɐn
earˈiə
totˈuː
allˈɔːl
hishˈɪz
storiesstˈɔːɹɪz
—
Lordslˈɔːdz
andˈænd
Commonskˈɒmənz
areə(ɹ)
bothbˈəʊθ
inˈɪn
theðə
bluesblˈuːz
!
Strephon
makesmˈeɪks
themðˈɛm
shakeʃˈeɪk
inˈɪn
theirðˈeə
shoesʃˈuːz
!
Shakeʃˈeɪk
inˈɪn
theirðˈeə
shoesʃˈuːz
!
Strephon
makesmˈeɪks
themðˈɛm
shakeʃˈeɪk
inˈɪn
theirðˈeə
shoesʃˈuːz
!
Enter Peers from Westminster Hall
CHORUS OF PEERS
Strephon's
a
Membermˈɛmbɐ
ofˈɒv
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
!
Runningɹˈʌnɪŋ
a-muck
ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
abusesəˈbjuːsɪz
.
Hishˈɪz
unqualifiedʌnkwˈɒlɪfˌaɪd
assentɐsˈɛnt
Somehowsˈʌmhaʊ
nobodynˈəʊbɒdˌi
nownˈaʊ
refusesɹɪfjˈuːzɪz
.
Whigsʍɪɡ
andˈænd
Toriesˈtɔː.ɹi
Dimdˈɪm
theirðˈeə
gloriesɡlˈɔːɹɪz
,
Givingɡˈɪvɪŋ
anˈɐn
earˈiə
totˈuː
allˈɔːl
hishˈɪz
storiesstˈɔːɹɪz
Carryingkˈæɹɪɪŋ
everyˈɛvɹi
Billbˈɪl
heˈhiː
maymˈeɪ
wishwˈɪʃ
:
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
kettlekˈɛtəl
ofˈɒv
fishfˈɪʃ
!
Kettlekˈɛtəl
ofˈɒv
fishfˈɪʃ
!
Here's
a
prettypɹˈɪti
kettlekˈɛtəl
ofˈɒv
fishfˈɪʃ
!
Enter Lord Mountararat and Lord Tolloller from Westminster Hall
CELIA
Youjˈuː
seemsˈiːm
annoyedɐnˈɔɪd
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Annoyedɐnˈɔɪd
!
I
shouldʃˈʊd
thinkθˈɪŋk
sosˈəʊ
!
Whywˈaɪ
,
thisðˈɪs
ridiculousɹɪdˈɪkjʊləs
protegeˈpɹɒtəʒeɪ
ofˈɒv
yoursjˈɔːz
isˈɪz
playingplˈeɪɪŋ
theðə
deucedjˈuːs
withwˈɪð
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
!
To-night is the second reading of his Bill to throw the Peerage
LORD MOUNTARARAT
openˈəʊpən
totˈuː
Competitivekəmpˈɛtɪtˌɪv
Examinationɛɡzˌæmɪnˈeɪʃən
!
LORD TOLL.
Andˈænd
he'll
carrykˈæɹi
itˈɪt
,
tootˈuː
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Carrykˈæɹi
itˈɪt
?
Ofˈɒv
coursekˈɔːs
heˈhiː
willwˈɪl
!
He's
a
Parliamentarypˌɑːləmˈɛntəɹi
Pickford
—
heˈhiː
carrieskˈæɹɪz
everythingˈɛvɹɪθˌɪŋ
!
LEILA
Yesjˈɛs
.
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
pleaseplˈiːz
,
that's
ourˈaʊə
faultfˈɒlt
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Theðə
deucedjˈuːs
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
!
CELIA
Yesjˈɛs
;
wewˈiː
influenceˈɪnfluːəns
theðə
membersmˈɛmbəz
,
andˈænd
compelkəmpˈɛl
themðˈɛm
totˈuː
votevˈəʊt
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
heˈhiː
wisheswˈɪʃɪz
themðˈɛm
totˈuː
.
LEILA
It's
ourˈaʊə
systemsˈɪstəm
.
Itˈɪt
shortensʃˈɔːtənz
theðə
debatesdɪbˈeɪts
.
LORD TOLL.
Wellwˈɛl
,
butbˈʌt
thinkθˈɪŋk
whatwˈɒt
itˈɪt
allˈɔːl
meansmˈiːnz
.
I
don't
sosˈəʊ
muchmˈʌtʃ
mindmˈaɪnd
forfˈɔː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
,
butbˈʌt
withwˈɪð
a
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
withwˈɪð
nonəʊ
grandfathersɡɹˈændfɑːðəz
worthwˈɜːθ
mentioningmˈɛnʃənɪŋ
,
theðə
countrykˈʌntɹi
mustmˈʌst
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
theðə
dogsdˈɒɡz
!
LEILA
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
itˈɪt
mustmˈʌst
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
I
don't
wantwˈɒnt
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
a
wordwˈɜːd
againstɐɡˈɛnst
brainsbɹˈeɪnz
—
I've
a
greatɡɹˈeɪt
respectɹɪspˈɛkt
forfˈɔː
brainsbɹˈeɪnz
—
I
oftenˈɒfən
wishwˈɪʃ
I
hadhˈæd
somesˈʌm
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
—
butbˈʌt
withwˈɪð
a
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
composedkəmpˈəʊzd
exclusivelyɛksklˈuːsɪvli
ofˈɒv
peoplepˈiːpəl
ofˈɒv
intellectˈɪntəlˌɛkt
,
what's
totˈuː
becomebɪkˈʌm
ofˈɒv
theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Commonskˈɒmənz
?
LEILA
I
nevernˈɛvɐ
thoughtθˈɔːt
ofˈɒv
thatðˈæt
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Thisðˈɪs
comeskˈʌmz
ofˈɒv
womenwˈɪmɪn
interferingˌɪntəfˈiəɹɪŋ
inˈɪn
politicspˈɒlətˌɪks
.
Itˈɪt
sosˈəʊ
happenshˈæpənz
thatðˈæt
ifˈɪf
thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
anˈɐn
institutionˌɪnstɪtjˈuːʃən
inˈɪn
Greatɡɹˈeɪt
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
susceptiblesəsˈɛptəbəl
ofˈɒv
anyˈɛni
improvementɪmpɹˈuːvmənt
atˈæt
allˈɔːl
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
!
Whenwˈɛn
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
reallyɹˈiəli
ruledɹˈuːld
theðə
waveswˈeɪvz
—
In good Queen Bess's time
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
mademˈeɪd
nonəʊ
pretencepɹɪtˈɛns
Totˈuː
intellectualˌɪntəlˈɛktʃuːəl
eminenceˈɛmɪnəns
,
Orˈɔː
scholarshipskˈɒləʃˌɪp
sublimesʌblˈaɪm
;
Yetjˈɛt
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
wonwʌn
herhˈɜː
proudestpɹˈaʊdəst
baysbˈeɪz
Inˈɪn
goodɡˈʊd
Queenkwˈiːn
Bess's
gloriousɡlˈɔːɹɪəs
daysdˈeɪz
!
CHORUS
Yesjˈɛs
,
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
wonwʌn
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Whenwˈɛn
Wellingtonwˈɛlɪŋtən
thrashedθɹˈæʃt
Bonaparte
,
Asəz
everyˈɛvɹi
childtʃˈaɪld
cankˈæn
telltˈɛl
,
Theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
,
throughoutθɹuːˈaʊt
theðə
warwˈɔː
,
Diddˈɪd
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
inˈɪn
particularpətˈɪkjʊlɐ
,
Andˈænd
diddˈɪd
itˈɪt
veryvˈɛɹi
wellwˈɛl
:
Yetjˈɛt
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
setsˈɛt
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
ablazeɐblˈeɪz
Inˈɪn
goodɡˈʊd
Kingkˈɪŋ
George's
gloriousɡlˈɔːɹɪəs
daysdˈeɪz
!
Yesjˈɛs
,
Britainˈbɹɪt.ən
setsˈɛt
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Andˈænd
whilewˈaɪl
theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
withholdswɪðhˈəʊldz
Itsˈɪts
legislativelˈɛdʒɪslətˌɪv
handhˈænd
,
Andˈænd
noblenˈəʊbəl
statesmenstˈeɪtsmɛn
dodə
notnˈɒt
itchˈɪtʃ
Totˈuː
interfereˌɪntəfˈiə
withwˈɪð
mattersmˈætəz
whichwˈɪtʃ
Theyðˈeɪ
dodə
notnˈɒt
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
,
Asəz
brightbɹˈaɪt
willwˈɪl
shineʃˈaɪn
Greatɡɹˈeɪt
Britain's
raysɹˈeɪz
Asəz
inˈɪn
Kingkˈɪŋ
George's
gloriousɡlˈɔːɹɪəs
daysdˈeɪz
!
Asəz
brightbɹˈaɪt
willwˈɪl
shineʃˈaɪn
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
LEILA
(
whohˈuː
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
muchmˈʌtʃ
attractedɐtɹˈæktɪd
bybˈaɪ
theðə
Peerspɪɹz
duringdjˈɔːɹɪŋ
thisðˈɪs
songsˈɒŋ
).
Charmingtʃˈɑːmɪŋ
personspˈɜːsənz
,
areə(ɹ)
theyðˈeɪ
notnˈɒt
?
CELIA
Distinctlydɪstˈɪŋktli
.
Forfˈɔː
self-containedˈsɛlf.kənˌteɪnd
dignitydˈɪɡnɪti
,
combinedkəmbˈaɪnd
withwˈɪð
airyˈeəɹi
condescensionkˌɒndɪsˈɛnʃən
,
giveɡˈɪv
memˈiː
a
Britishˈbɹɪtɪʃ
Representativeɹˌɛpɹɪzˈɛntətˌɪv
Peerpɪə̯
!
LORD TOLL.
Thenðˈɛn
praypɹˈeɪ
stopstˈɒp
thisðˈɪs
protegeˈpɹɒtəʒeɪ
ofˈɒv
yoursjˈɔːz
beforebɪfˈɔː
it's
tootˈuː
latelˈeɪt
.
Thinkθˈɪŋk
ofˈɒv
theðə
mischiefmˈɪstʃɪf
you're
doingdˈuːɪŋ
!
LEILAˈleɪlə
(
cryingkɹˈaɪɪŋ
).
Butbˈʌt
wewˈiː
can't
stopstˈɒp
himhˈɪm
nownˈaʊ
.
Aside to Celia
LORD TOLL.
Aren't
theyðˈeɪ
lovelylˈʌvli
!
(
Aloudɐlˈaʊd
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
whywˈaɪ
diddˈɪd
youjˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
andˈænd
defydɪfˈaɪ
usˈʌs
,
youjˈuː
greatɡɹˈeɪt
geeseɡˈiːs
!
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
LEILAˈleɪlə
andˈænd
CELIA
.
LEILA
Inˈɪn
vainvˈeɪn
totˈuː
usˈʌs
youjˈuː
pleadplˈiːd
—
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
Yourjˈɔː
prayerspɹɛɹz
wewˈiː
dodə
notnˈɒt
heedhˈiːd
—
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
It's true we sigh,
LEILA
Butbˈʌt
don't
supposesʌpˈəʊz
A
tearfultˈiəfəl
eyeˈaɪ
Forgivenessfəɡˈɪvnəs
showsʃˈəʊz
.
Ohˈəʊ
,
nonəʊ
!
We're
veryvˈɛɹi
crosskɹˈɒs
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
—
Yesjˈɛs
,
veryvˈɛɹi
crosskɹˈɒs
,
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
It's true we sigh, etc.
CELIA
Yourjˈɔː
disrespectfuldˌɪsɹɪspˈɛktfəl
sneerssnˈiəz
—
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
Callkˈɔːl
forthfˈɔːθ
indignantɪndˈɪɡnənt
tearstɪɹz
—
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
Youjˈuː
breakbɹˈeɪk
ourˈaʊə
lawslˈɔːz
—
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
ourˈaʊə
foefˈəʊ
:
Wewˈiː
crykɹˈaɪ
becausebɪkˈʌz
Wewˈiː
hatehˈeɪt
youjˈuː
sosˈəʊ
!
Youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
!
Youjˈuː
veryvˈɛɹi
wickedˈwɪkɪd
Peerspɪɹz
!
Youjˈuː
wickedˈwɪkɪd
Peerspɪɹz
!
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
LORDS MOUNTARARAT
andˈænd
TOLLtˈəʊl
.
Youjˈuː
breakbɹˈeɪk
ourˈaʊə
lawslˈɔːz
—
Ourˈaʊə
disrespectfuldˌɪsɹɪspˈɛktfəl
sneerssnˈiəz
,
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
ourˈaʊə
foefˈəʊ
:
Hahˈɑː
,
hahˈɑː
!
Wewˈiː
crykɹˈaɪ
becausebɪkˈʌz
Callkˈɔːl
forthfˈɔːθ
indignantɪndˈɪɡnənt
tearstɪɹz
,
Wewˈiː
hatehˈeɪt
youjˈuː
sosˈəʊ
!
Hahˈɑː
,
hahˈɑː
!
Youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
!
Ifˈɪf
that's
theðə
casekˈeɪs
,
mymˈaɪ
dearsdˈiəz
—
Youjˈuː
veryvˈɛɹi
wickedˈwɪkɪd
Peerspɪɹz
!
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
.
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
Don't
goɡˈəʊ
!
PEERSpɪɹz
.
We'll
goɡˈəʊ
!
(Exeunt Lord Mountararat, Lord Tolloller, and Peers.
LORDS MOUNTARARAT
Fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
gazeɡˈeɪz
wistfullywˈɪstfəli
afterˈɑːftɐ
themðˈɛm
)
Enter Fairy Queen
QUEEN
Ohˈəʊ
,
shameʃˈeɪm
—
shameʃˈeɪm
uponəpˈɒn
youjˈuː
!
Isˈɪz
thisðˈɪs
yourjˈɔː
fidelityfɪdˈɛlɪti
totˈuː
theðə
lawslˈɔːz
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
boundbˈaʊnd
totˈuː
obeyəʊbˈeɪ
?
Knownˈəʊ
yejiː
notnˈɒt
thatðˈæt
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
deathdˈɛθ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
?
LEILA
Yesjˈɛs
,
butbˈʌt
it's
notnˈɒt
deathdˈɛθ
totˈuː
wishwˈɪʃ
totˈuː
marrymˈæɹi
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
!
FLETA
Ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
werewˈɜː
,
you'd
havehəv
totˈuː
executeˈɛksɪkjˌuːt
usˈʌs
allˈɔːl
!
QUEEN
Ohˈəʊ
,
thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
weaknesswˈiːknəs
!
Subduesʌbdjˈuː
itˈɪt
!
CELIA
Wewˈiː
knownˈəʊ
it's
weaknesswˈiːknəs
,
butbˈʌt
theðə
weaknesswˈiːknəs
isˈɪz
sosˈəʊ
strongstɹˈɒŋ
!
LEILA
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
notnˈɒt
allˈɔːl
asəz
toughtˈʌf
asəz
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
!
QUEEN
Toughtˈʌf
!
Dodə
youjˈuː
supposesʌpˈəʊz
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
insensibleɪnsˈɛnsəbəl
totˈuː
theðə
effectɪfˈɛkt
ofˈɒv
manlymˈænli
beautybjˈuːti
?
Looklˈʊk
atˈæt
thatðˈæt
manmˈæn
!
(
Referringɹɪfˈɜːɹɪŋ
totˈuː
Sentrysˈɛntɹi
)
A
perfectˈpɜː.fɪkt
picturepˈɪktʃɐ
!
(
Totˈuː
Sentrysˈɛntɹi
)
Whohˈuː
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
,
sirsˈɜː
?
WILLISˈwɪlɪs
(
comingkˈʌmɪŋ
totˈuː
"
attentionɐtˈɛnʃən
").
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Willisˈwɪlɪs
,
B
Companykˈʌmpəni
,
1stfɝst
Grenadierɡɹˈɛnɐdɪɐ
Guardsɡˈɑːdz
.
You're
a
veryvˈɛɹi
finefaɪn
fellowfˈɛləʊ
,
sirsˈɜː
.
WILLIS
I
aməm
generallydʒˈɛnəɹəli
admiredɐdmˈaɪəd
.
QUEEN
I
cankˈæn
quitekwaɪt
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
itˈɪt
.
(
Totˈuː
Fairiesfˈeəɹɪz
)
Nownˈaʊ
herehˈiə
isˈɪz
a
manmˈæn
whosehˈuːz
physicalfˈɪzɪkəl
attributesˈæt.ɹɪ.bjuːt
areə(ɹ)
simplysˈɪmpli
godlikeɡˈɒdlaɪk
.
Thatðˈæt
manmˈæn
hashˈæz
a
mostmˈəʊst
extraordinaryɛkstɹˈɔːdɪnəɹi
effectɪfˈɛkt
uponəpˈɒn
memˈiː
.
Ifˈɪf
I
yieldedjˈiːldɪd
totˈuː
a
naturalnˈætʃəɹəl
impulse, I should fall down and worship that man.
QUEEN
Butbˈʌt
I
mortifymˈɔːtɪfˌaɪ
thisðˈɪs
inclinationɪnklɪnˈeɪʃən
;
I
wrestleɹˈɛsəl
withwˈɪð
itˈɪt
,
andˈænd
itˈɪt
lieslˈaɪz
beneathbɪnˈiːθ
mymˈaɪ
feetfˈiːt
!
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
howhˈaʊ
I
treattɹˈiːt
mymˈaɪ
regardɹɪɡˈɑːd
forfˈɔː
thatðˈæt
manmˈæn
!
FAIRY QUEEN
Ohˈəʊ
,
foolishfˈuːlɪʃ
fayfˈeɪ
,
Thinkθˈɪŋk
youjˈuː
,
becausebɪkˈʌz
Hishˈɪz
bravebɹˈeɪv
arrayɐɹˈeɪ
Mymˈaɪ
bosombˈʊsəm
thawsθˈɔːz
,
I'd
disobeydˌɪsəʊbˈeɪ
Ourˈaʊə
fairyfˈeəɹi
lawslˈɔːz
?
Becausebɪkˈʌz
I
flyflˈaɪ
Inˈɪn
realmsɹˈɛlmz
aboveəbˈʌv
,
Inˈɪn
tendencytˈɛndənsi
To fall in love,
FAIRY QUEEN
Resembleɹɪsˈɛmbəl
I
Theðə
amorousˈæməɹəs
dovedʌv
?
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
amorousˈæməɹəs
dovedʌv
!
Typetˈaɪp
ofˈɒv
Ovidius
Naso
!
Thisðˈɪs
hearthˈɑːt
ofˈɒv
minemˈaɪn
Isˈɪz
softsˈɒft
asəz
thineðˈaɪn
,
Althoughɒlðˈəʊ
I
daredˈeə
notnˈɒt
saysˈeɪ
sosˈəʊ
!
CHORUS
Ohˈəʊ
,
amorousˈæməɹəs
dovedʌv
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Onˈɒn
firefˈaɪə
thatðˈæt
glowsɡlˈəʊz
Withwˈɪð
heathˈiːt
intenseɪntˈɛns
I turn the hose
CHORUS
Ofˈɒv
commonkˈɒmən
sensesˈɛns
,
Andˈænd
outˈaʊt
itˈɪt
goesɡˈəʊz
Atˈæt
smallsmˈɔːl
expenseɛkspˈɛns
!
Wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
maintainmeɪntˈeɪn
Ourˈaʊə
fairyfˈeəɹi
lawlˈɔː
;
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
theðə
mainmˈeɪn
On which to draw—
CHORUS
Inˈɪn
thatðˈæt
wewˈiː
gainɡˈeɪn
A
Captainkˈæptɪn
Shawʃˈɔː
!
(
Asideɐsˈaɪd
)
Ohˈəʊ
,
Captainkˈæptɪn
Shawʃˈɔː
!
Typetˈaɪp
ofˈɒv
truetɹˈuː
lovelˈʌv
keptkˈɛpt
underˈʌndɐ
!
Couldkˈʊd
thyðˈaɪ
Brigadebɹɪɡˈeɪd
Withwˈɪð
coldkˈəʊld
cascadekɐskˈeɪd
Quenchkwˈɛntʃ
mymˈaɪ
greatɡɹˈeɪt
lovelˈʌv
,
I
wonderwˈʌndɐ
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
Captainkˈæptɪn
Shawʃˈɔː
!
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
Exeunt Fairies and Fairy Queen, sorrowfully
Enter Phyllis
PHYLLIS
(
halfhˈɑːf
cryingkɹˈaɪɪŋ
).
I
can't
thinkθˈɪŋk
whywˈaɪ
I'm
notnˈɒt
inˈɪn
betterbˈɛtɐ
spiritsspˈɪɹɪts
.
I'm
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
twotˈuː
noblemennˈəʊbəlmˌɛn
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
Thatðˈæt
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
bebˈiː
enoughɪnˈʌf
totˈuː
makemˈeɪk
anyˈɛni
girlɡˈɜːl
happyhˈæpi
.
Butbˈʌt
I'm
miserablemˈɪzɹəbəl
!
Don't
supposesʌpˈəʊz
it's
becausebɪkˈʌz
I
carekˈeə
forfˈɔː
Strephon
,
forfˈɔː
I
hatehˈeɪt
himhˈɪm
!
Nonəʊ
girlɡˈɜːl
couldkˈʊd
carekˈeə
forfˈɔː
a
manmˈæn
whohˈuː
goesɡˈəʊz
aboutɐbˈaʊt
withwˈɪð
a
motherˈmʌðə
considerablykənsˈɪdəɹəbli
youngerjˈʌŋɡɐ
thanðˈɐn
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
!
Enter Lord Mountararat and Lord Tolloller
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Mymˈaɪ
darlingdˈɑːlɪŋ
!
LORD TOLL.
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
!
PHYLLIS
Don't
!
Howhˈaʊ
daredˈeə
youjˈuː
?
Ohˈəʊ
,
butbˈʌt
perhapspəhˈæps
you're
theðə
twotˈuː
noblemennˈəʊbəlmˌɛn
I'm
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
?
LORD MOUNTARARAT
I
aməm
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
themðˈɛm
.
LORD TOLL.
I
aməm
theðə
otherˈʌðɐ
.
PHYLLIS
Ohˈəʊ
,
thenðˈɛn
,
mymˈaɪ
darlingdˈɑːlɪŋ
!
(
totˈuː
Lordlˈɔːd
Mountararat
).
Mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
!
(
totˈuː
Lordlˈɔːd
Tolloller
).
Wellwˈɛl
,
havehəv
youjˈuː
settledsˈɛtəld
whichwˈɪtʃ
it's
totˈuː
bebˈiː
?
LORD TOLL.
Notnˈɒt
altogetherˌɔːltəɡˈɛðɐ
.
It's
a
difficultdˈɪfɪkəlt
positionpəzˈɪʃən
.
Itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
hardlyhˈɑːdli
delicatedˈɛlɪkət
totˈuː
tosstˈɒs
upˈʌp
.
Onˈɒn
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
wewˈiː
wouldwˈʊd
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
leave it to you.
PHYLLIS
Howhˈaʊ
cankˈæn
itˈɪt
possiblypˈɒsəbli
concernkənsˈɜːn
memˈiː
?
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
bothbˈəʊθ
EarIs
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
bothbˈəʊθ
richɹˈɪtʃ
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
bothbˈəʊθ
plainplˈeɪn
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Sosˈəʊ
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
.
Atˈæt
leastlˈiːst
I
aməm
.
LORD TOLL.
Sosˈəʊ
aməm
I
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
!
LORD TOLL.
I
aməm
indeedˌɪndˈiːd
.
Veryvˈɛɹi
plainplˈeɪn
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Wellwˈɛl
,
wellwˈɛl
—
perhapspəhˈæps
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
.
PHYLLIS
There's
reallyɹˈiəli
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
totˈuː
choosetʃˈuːz
betweenbɪtwˈiːn
youjˈuː
.
Ifˈɪf
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
youjˈuː
wouldwˈʊd
forgofˈɔːɡəʊ
hishˈɪz
titletˈaɪtəl
,
andˈænd
distributedˈɪstɹɪbjˌuːt
hishˈɪz
estatesɪstˈeɪts
amongɐmˈʌŋ
hishˈɪz
Irishˈaɪɹɪʃ
tenantrytˈɛnəntɹˌi
,
whywˈaɪ
,
thenðˈɛn
,
I
shouldʃˈʊd
thenðˈɛn
seesˈiː
a
reasonɹˈiːzən
forfˈɔː
acceptingɐksˈɛptɪŋ
theðə
otherˈʌðɐ
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Tolloller
,
areə(ɹ)
youjˈuː
preparedpɹɪpˈeəd
totˈuː
makemˈeɪk
thisðˈɪs
sacrificesˈækɹɪfˌaɪs
?
LORD TOLL.
Nonəʊ
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Notnˈɒt
evenˈiːvən
totˈuː
obligeəblˈaɪdʒ
a
ladylˈeɪdi
?
LORD TOLL.
Nonəʊ
!
notnˈɒt
evenˈiːvən
totˈuː
obligeəblˈaɪdʒ
a
ladylˈeɪdi
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Thenðˈɛn
,
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
questionkwˈɛstʃən
isˈɪz
,
whichwˈɪtʃ
ofˈɒv
usˈʌs
shallʃˈæl
giveɡˈɪv
waywˈeɪ
totˈuː
theðə
otherˈʌðɐ
?
Perhapspəhˈæps
,
onˈɒn
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
,
sheʃˈiː
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
happierhˈæpɪɐ
withwˈɪð
memˈiː
.
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
.
I
maymˈeɪ
bebˈiː
wrongɹˈɒŋ
.
LORD TOLL.
Nonəʊ
.
I
don't
knownˈəʊ
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
.
I
reallyɹˈiəli
believebɪlˈiːv
sheʃˈiː
wouldwˈʊd
.
Butbˈʌt
theðə
awkwardˈɔːkwəd
partpˈɑːt
ofˈɒv
theðə
thingθˈɪŋ
isˈɪz
thatðˈæt
ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
robɹˈɒb
memˈiː
ofˈɒv
theðə
girlɡˈɜːl
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
hearthˈɑːt
,
wewˈiː
mustmˈʌst
fightfˈaɪt
,
andˈænd
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
usˈʌs
mustmˈʌst
diedˈaɪ
.
It's
a
familyfˈæmɪli
traditiontɹɐdˈɪʃən
thatðˈæt
I
havehəv
swornswˈɔːn
totˈuː
respectɹɪspˈɛkt
.
It's
a
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
positionpəzˈɪʃən
,
forfˈɔː
I
havehəv
a
veryvˈɛɹi
strongstɹˈɒŋ
regardɹɪɡˈɑːd
forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
,
Georgedʒɔː(ɹ)dʒ
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
(
muchmˈʌtʃ
affectedɐfˈɛktɪd
).
Mymˈaɪ
deardˈiə
Thomasˈtɒm.əs
!
LORD TOLL.
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
veryvˈɛɹi
deardˈiə
totˈuː
memˈiː
,
Georgedʒɔː(ɹ)dʒ
.
Wewˈiː
werewˈɜː
boysbˈɔɪz
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
—
atˈæt
leastlˈiːst
I
waswˈɒz
.
Ifˈɪf
I
werewˈɜː
totˈuː
survivesəvˈaɪv
youjˈuː
,
mymˈaɪ
existenceɛɡzˈɪstəns
wouldwˈʊd
bebˈiː
hopelesslyhˈəʊpləsli
embitteredɛmbˈɪtəd
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Thenðˈɛn
,
mymˈaɪ
deardˈiə
Thomasˈtɒm.əs
,
youjˈuː
mustmˈʌst
notnˈɒt
dodə
itˈɪt
.
I
saysˈeɪ
itˈɪt
againɐɡˈɛn
andˈænd
againɐɡˈɛn
—
ifˈɪf
itˈɪt
willwˈɪl
havehəv
thisðˈɪs
effectɪfˈɛkt
uponəpˈɒn
youjˈuː
,
youjˈuː
mustmˈʌst
notnˈɒt
dodə
itˈɪt
.
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
.
Ifˈɪf
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
usˈʌs
isˈɪz
totˈuː
destroydɪstɹˈɔɪ
theðə
otherˈʌðɐ
,
letlˈɛt
itˈɪt
bebˈiː
memˈiː
!
LORD TOLL.
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Ahˈɑː
,
yesjˈɛs
!—
bybˈaɪ
ourˈaʊə
boyishbˈɔɪɪʃ
friendshipfɹˈɛndʃɪp
I
imploreɪmplˈɔː
youjˈuː
!
LORD TOLL.
(
muchmˈʌtʃ
movedmˈuːvd
).
Wellwˈɛl
,
wellwˈɛl
,
bebˈiː
itˈɪt
sosˈəʊ
.
Butbˈʌt
,
nonəʊ
—
nonəʊ
!—
I
cannotˈkænɒt
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
anˈɐn
actˈækt
whichwˈɪtʃ
wouldwˈʊd
crushkɹˈʌʃ
youjˈuː
withwˈɪð
unavaillng
remorseɹɪmˈɔːs
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
notnˈɒt
dodə
sosˈəʊ
.
I
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
veryvˈɛɹi
sadsˈæd
atˈæt
firstfˈɜːst
—
ohˈəʊ
,
whohˈuː
wouldwˈʊd
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
?—
butbˈʌt
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
wearwɛə
offˈɒf
.
I
likelˈaɪk
youjˈuː
veryvˈɛɹi
muchmˈʌtʃ
—
butbˈʌt
notnˈɒt
,
perhapspəhˈæps
,
asəz
muchmˈʌtʃ
asəz
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
memˈiː
.
LORD TOLL.
Georgedʒɔː(ɹ)dʒ
,
you're
a
noblenˈəʊbəl
fellowfˈɛləʊ
,
butbˈʌt
thatðˈæt
tell-taleˈtɛlteɪl
teartɛə
betraysbɪtɹˈeɪz
youjˈuː
.
Nonəʊ
,
Georgedʒɔː(ɹ)dʒ
;
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
veryvˈɛɹi
fondfˈɒnd
ofˈɒv
memˈiː
,
andˈænd
I
cannotˈkænɒt
consentkənsˈɛnt
totˈuː
giveɡˈɪv
youjˈuː
a
week's
uneasinessʌnˈiːzɪnəs
onˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
accountɐkˈaʊnt
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Butbˈʌt
,
deardˈiə
Thomasˈtɒm.əs
,
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
notnˈɒt
lastlˈɑːst
a
weekwˈiːk
!
Rememberɹɪmˈɛmbɐ
,
youjˈuː
leadlɛd
theðə
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Lordslˈɔːdz
!
Onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
demisedɪmˈaɪz
I
shallʃˈæl
taketˈeɪk
yourjˈɔː
placeplˈeɪs
!
Ohˈəʊ
,
Thomasˈtɒm.əs
,
itˈɪt
wouldwˈʊd
notnˈɒt
lastlˈɑːst
a
daydˈeɪ
!
PHYLLIS
(
comingkˈʌmɪŋ
downdˈaʊn
).
Nownˈaʊ
,
I
dodə
hopehˈəʊp
you're
notnˈɒt
goingɡˈəʊɪŋ
totˈuː
fightfˈaɪt
aboutɐbˈaʊt
memˈiː
,
becausebɪkˈʌz
it's
reallyɹˈiəli
notnˈɒt
worthwˈɜːθ
whilewˈaɪl
.
LORD TOLL.
(
lookinglˈʊkɪŋ
atˈæt
herhˈɜː
).
Wellwˈɛl
,
I
don't
believebɪlˈiːv
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Nornˈɔː
I
.
Theðə
sacredsˈeɪkɹəd
tiestˈaɪz
ofˈɒv
Friendshipfɹˈɛndʃɪp
areə(ɹ)
paramountpˈæɹəmˌaʊnt
.
LORDlˈɔːd
TOLLOLLER
,
PHYLLISˈfɪlɪs
,
andˈænd
PRIVATEpɹˈaɪvət
WILLISˈwɪlɪs
.
LORD TOLL.
Thoughðˈəʊ
p'r'aps
I
maymˈeɪ
incurɪnkˈɜː
yourjˈɔː
blameblˈeɪm
,
Theðə
thingsθˈɪŋz
areə(ɹ)
fewfjˈuː
I
wouldwˈʊd
notnˈɒt
dodə
Inˈɪn
Friendship's
namenˈeɪm
!
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Andˈænd
I
maymˈeɪ
saysˈeɪ
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
theðə
samesˈeɪm
;
Notnˈɒt
evenˈiːvən
lovelˈʌv
Shouldʃˈʊd
rankɹˈæŋk
aboveəbˈʌv
Truetɹˈuː
Friendship's
namenˈeɪm
!
PHYLLIS
Thenðˈɛn
freefɹˈiː
memˈiː
,
praypɹˈeɪ
;
bebˈiː
minemˈaɪn
theðə
blameblˈeɪm
;
Forgetfəɡˈɛt
yourjˈɔː
crazekɹˈeɪz
Andˈænd
goɡˈəʊ
yourjˈɔː
wayswˈeɪz
Inˈɪn
Friendship's
namenˈeɪm
!
ALL
Ohˈəʊ
,
manymˈɛni
a
manmˈæn
,
inˈɪn
Friendship's
namenˈeɪm
,
Hashˈæz
yieldedjˈiːldɪd
fortunefˈɔːtʃuːn
,
rankɹˈæŋk
,
andˈænd
famefˈeɪm
!
Butbˈʌt
nonəʊ
onewˈɒn
yetjˈɛt
,
inˈɪn
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
sosˈəʊ
widewˈaɪd
,
Hashˈæz
yieldedjˈiːldɪd
upˈʌp
a
promisedpɹˈɒmɪsd
bridebɹˈaɪd
!
WILLIS
Acceptɐksˈɛpt
,
O
Friendshipfɹˈɛndʃɪp
,
allˈɔːl
theðə
samesˈeɪm
,
ALL
Thisðˈɪs
sacrificesˈækɹɪfˌaɪs
totˈuː
thyðˈaɪ
deardˈiə
namenˈeɪm
!
(Exeunt Lord Mountararat and Lord Tolloller, lovingly, in one
ALL
directiondaɪɹˈɛkʃən
,
andˈænd
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
inˈɪn
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
.
Exit Sentry)
Enter Lord Chancellor, very miserable
LORD CHANCELLOR
Lovelˈʌv
,
unrequitedˌʌnɹɪkwˈaɪtɪd
,
robsɹˈɒbz
memˈiː
ofˈɒv
mymˈaɪ
restɹˈɛst
:
Lovelˈʌv
,
hopelesshˈəʊpləs
lovelˈʌv
,
mymˈaɪ
ardentˈɑːdənt
soulsˈəʊl
encumbersɪnˈkʌmbə(ɹ)
:
Lovelˈʌv
,
nightmare-like
,
lieslˈaɪz
heavyhˈɛvi
onˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
chesttʃˈɛst
,
Andˈænd
weaveswˈiːvz
itselfɪtsˈɛlf
intoˈɪntʊ
mymˈaɪ
midnightmˈɪdnaɪt
slumbersslˈʌmbəz
!
Whenwˈɛn
you're
lyinglˈaɪɪŋ
awakeɐwˈeɪk
withwˈɪð
a
dismaldˈɪzməl
headachehˈɛdeɪk
,
andˈænd
reposeɹɪpˈəʊz
isˈɪz
taboo'd
bybˈaɪ
anxietyæŋzˈaɪəti
,
I
conceivekənsˈiːv
youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
usejuːs
anyˈɛni
languagelˈæŋɡwɪdʒ
youjˈuː
choosetʃˈuːz
totˈuː
indulgeɪndˈʌldʒ
inˈɪn
,
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
improprietyɪmpɹəpɹˈaɪəti
;
Forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
brainbɹˈeɪn
isˈɪz
onˈɒn
firefˈaɪə
—
theðə
bedclothesbˈɛdkləʊðz
conspirekənspˈaɪə
ofˈɒv
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
slumberslˈʌmbɐ
totˈuː
plunderplˈʌndɐ
youjˈuː
:
Firstfˈɜːst
yourjˈɔː
counterpanekˈaʊntəpˌeɪn
goesɡˈəʊz
,
andˈænd
uncoversʌnkˈʌvəz
yourjˈɔː
toestˈəʊz
,
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
sheetʃˈiːt
slipsslˈɪps
demurelydɪmjˈɔːli
fromfɹˈɒm
underˈʌndɐ
youjˈuː
;
Thenðˈɛn
theðə
blanketingblˈæŋkɪtɪŋ
ticklestˈɪkəlz
—
youjˈuː
feelfˈiːl
likelˈaɪk
mixedmˈɪkst
picklespˈɪkəlz
—
sosˈəʊ
terriblytˈɛɹəbli
sharpʃˈɑːp
isˈɪz
theðə
prickingpɹˈɪkɪŋ
,
Andˈænd
you're
hothˈɒt
,
andˈænd
you're
crosskɹˈɒs
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
tumbletˈʌmbəl
andˈænd
tosstˈɒs
tilltˈɪl
there's
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
'twixt
youjˈuː
andˈænd
theðə
tickingtˈɪkɪŋ
.
Thenðˈɛn
theðə
bedclothesbˈɛdkləʊðz
allˈɔːl
creepkɹˈiːp
totˈuː
theðə
groundɡɹˈaʊnd
inˈɪn
a
heaphˈiːp
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
pickpˈɪk
'em
allˈɔːl
upˈʌp
inˈɪn
a
tangletˈæŋɡəl
;
Nextnˈɛkst
yourjˈɔː
pillowpˈɪləʊ
resignsɹɪˈzaɪn
andˈænd
politelypəlˈaɪtli
declinesdɪklˈaɪnz
totˈuː
remainɹɪmˈeɪn
atˈæt
itsˈɪts
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
angleˈæŋɡəl
!
Wellwˈɛl
,
youjˈuː
getɡˈɛt
somesˈʌm
reposeɹɪpˈəʊz
inˈɪn
theðə
formfˈɔːm
ofˈɒv
a
dozedˈəʊz
,
withwˈɪð
hothˈɒt
eye-balls
andˈænd
headhˈɛd
everˈɛvɐ
achingˈeɪkɪŋ
.
Butbˈʌt
yourjˈɔː
slumberingslˈʌmbəɹɪŋ
teemstˈiːmz
withwˈɪð
suchsˈʌtʃ
horriblehˈɒɹɪbəl
dreamsdɹˈiːmz
thatðˈæt
you'd
veryvˈɛɹi
muchmˈʌtʃ
betterbˈɛtɐ
bebˈiː
wakingwˈeɪkɪŋ
;
Forfˈɔː
youjˈuː
dreamdɹˈiːm
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
crossingkɹˈɒsɪŋ
theðə
Channeltʃˈænəl
,
andˈænd
tossingtˈɒsɪŋ
aboutɐbˈaʊt
inˈɪn
a
steamerstˈiːmɐ
fromfɹˈɒm
Harwichˈhæɹɪt͡ʃ
—
Whichwˈɪtʃ
isˈɪz
somethingsˈʌmθɪŋ
betweenbɪtwˈiːn
a
largelˈɑːdʒ
bathingbˈeɪðɪŋ
machineməʃˈiːn
andˈænd
a
veryvˈɛɹi
smallsmˈɔːl
second-class
carriagekˈæɹɪdʒ
—
Andˈænd
you're
givingɡˈɪvɪŋ
a
treattɹˈiːt
(
pennypˈɛni
iceˈaɪs
andˈænd
coldkˈəʊld
meatmˈiːt
)
totˈuː
a
partypˈɑːti
ofˈɒv
friendsfɹˈɛndz
andˈænd
relationsɹɪlˈeɪʃənz
—
They're
a
ravenousɹˈævənəs
hordehˈɔːd
—
andˈænd
theyðˈeɪ
allˈɔːl
camekˈeɪm
onˈɒn
boardbˈɔːd
atˈæt
Sloanesləʊn
Squareskwˈeə
andˈænd
Southsˈaʊθ
Kensingtonˈkɛn.zɪŋ.tən
Stationsstˈeɪʃənz
.
Andˈænd
boundbˈaʊnd
onˈɒn
thatðˈæt
journeydʒˈɜːni
youjˈuː
findfˈaɪnd
yourjˈɔː
attorneyɐtˈɜːni
(
whohˈuː
startedstˈɑːtɪd
thatðˈæt
morningmˈɔːnɪŋ
fromfɹˈɒm
Devonˈdɛv.ən
);
He's
a
bitbˈɪt
undersizedˌʌndəsˈaɪzd
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
don't
feelfˈiːl
surprisedsəpɹˈaɪzd
whenwˈɛn
heˈhiː
tellstˈɛlz
youjˈuː
he's
onlyˈəʊnli
elevenɪlˈɛvən
.
Wellwˈɛl
,
you're
drivingdɹˈaɪvɪŋ
likelˈaɪk
madmˈæd
withwˈɪð
thisðˈɪs
singularsˈɪŋɡjʊlɐ
ladlˈæd
(
bybˈaɪ
theðə
bybˈaɪ
,
theðə
ship's
nownˈaʊ
a
four-wheeler
),
Andˈænd
you're
playingplˈeɪɪŋ
roundɹˈaʊnd
gamesɡˈeɪmz
,
andˈænd
heˈhiː
callskˈɔːlz
youjˈuː
badbˈæd
namesnˈeɪmz
whenwˈɛn
youjˈuː
telltˈɛl
himhˈɪm
thatðˈæt
"
tiestˈaɪz
paypˈeɪ
theðə
dealerdˈiːlɐ
";
But this you can't stand, so you throw up your hand, and you find
LORD CHANCELLOR
you're
asəz
coldkˈəʊld
asəz
anˈɐn
icicleˈaɪsɪkəl
,
Inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
shirtʃˈɜːt
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
sockssˈɒks
(
theðə
blackblˈæk
silksˈɪlk
withwˈɪð
goldɡˈəʊld
clocksklˈɒks
),
crossingkɹˈɒsɪŋ
Salisburyˈsɒlz.bɹi
Plainplˈeɪn
onˈɒn
a
bicyclebˈaɪsɪkəl
:
Andˈænd
heˈhiː
andˈænd
theðə
crewkɹˈuː
areə(ɹ)
onˈɒn
bicyclesbˈaɪsɪkəlz
tootˈuː
—
whichwˈɪtʃ
they've
somehowsˈʌmhaʊ
orˈɔː
otherˈʌðɐ
investedɪnvˈɛstɪd
inˈɪn
—
Andˈænd
he's
tellingtˈɛlɪŋ
theðə
tarstˈɑːz
allˈɔːl
theðə
particularspətˈɪkjʊləz
ofˈɒv
a
companykˈʌmpəni
he's
interestedˈɪntɹəstɪd
inˈɪn
—
It's
a
schemeskˈiːm
ofˈɒv
devicesdɪvˈaɪsɪz
,
totˈuː
getɡˈɛt
atˈæt
lowlˈəʊ
pricespɹˈaɪsɪz
allˈɔːl
goodsɡˈʊdz
fromfɹˈɒm
coughkˈɒf
mixturesmˈɪkstʃəz
totˈuː
cableskˈeɪbəlz
(
Whichwˈɪtʃ
tickledtˈɪkəld
theðə
sailorssˈeɪləz
),
bybˈaɪ
treatingtɹˈiːtɪŋ
retailersɹˈiːteɪləz
asəz
thoughðˈəʊ
theyðˈeɪ
werewˈɜː
allˈɔːl
vegetablesvˈɛdʒɪtəbəlz
—
Youjˈuː
getɡˈɛt
a
goodɡˈʊd
spadesman
totˈuː
plantplˈænt
a
smallsmˈɔːl
tradesmantɹˈeɪdzmən
(
firstfˈɜːst
taketˈeɪk
offˈɒf
hishˈɪz
bootsbˈuːts
withwˈɪð
a
boot-tree
),
Andˈænd
hishˈɪz
legslˈɛɡz
willwˈɪl
taketˈeɪk
rootɹˈuːt
,
andˈænd
hishˈɪz
fingersfˈɪŋɡəz
willwˈɪl
shootʃˈuːt
,
andˈænd
they'll
blossomblˈɒsəm
andˈænd
budbˈʌd
likelˈaɪk
a
fruit-treeˈfɹu(ː)t tɹiː
—
Fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
greengrocerɡɹˈiːŋɡɹəʊsɐ
treetɹˈiː
youjˈuː
getɡˈɛt
grapesɡɹˈeɪps
andˈænd
greenɡɹˈiːn
peapˈiː
,
cauliflowerkˈɒlɪflˌaʊɐ
,
pineapplepˈaɪnæpəl
,
andˈænd
cranberrieskɹˈænbəɹɪz
,
Whilewˈaɪl
theðə
pastrycook
plantplˈænt
cherrytʃˈɛɹi
brandybɹˈændi
willwˈɪl
grantɡɹˈɑːnt
,
appleˈæpəl
puffspˈʌfs
,
andˈænd
threeθɹˈiː
cornerskˈɔːnəz
,
andˈænd
Banburys
—
Theðə
sharesʃˈeəz
areə(ɹ)
a
pennypˈɛni
,
andˈænd
everˈɛvɐ
sosˈəʊ
manymˈɛni
areə(ɹ)
takentˈeɪkən
bybˈaɪ
Rothschildˈɹɒθs.t͡ʃaɪld
andˈænd
Baringbˈeəɹɪŋ
,
Andˈænd
justdʒˈʌst
asəz
a
fewfjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
allottedɐlˈɒtɪd
totˈuː
youjˈuː
,
youjˈuː
awakeɐwˈeɪk
withwˈɪð
a
shudderʃˈʌdɐ
despairingdɪspˈeəɹɪŋ
—
You're
a
regularɹˈɛɡjuːlɐ
wreckɹˈɛk
,
withwˈɪð
a
crickkɹˈɪk
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
necknˈɛk
,
andˈænd
nonəʊ
wonderwˈʌndɐ
youjˈuː
snoresnˈɔː
,
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
head's
onˈɒn
theðə
floorflˈɔː
,
andˈænd
you've
needlesnˈiːdəlz
andˈænd
pinspˈɪnz
fromfɹˈɒm
yourjˈɔː
solessɒl
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
shinsʃˈɪnz
,
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
fleshflˈɛʃ
isˈɪz
a-creep
,
forfˈɔː
yourjˈɔː
leftlˈɛft
leg's
asleepɐslˈiːp
,
andˈænd
you've
crampkɹˈæmp
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
toestˈəʊz
,
andˈænd
a
flyflˈaɪ
onˈɒn
yourjˈɔː
nosenˈəʊz
,
andˈænd
somesˈʌm
fluffflˈʌf
inˈɪn
yourjˈɔː
lunglˈʌŋ
,
andˈænd
a
feverishfˈiːvəɹɪʃ
tonguetˈʌŋ
,
andˈænd
a
thirstθˈɜːst
that's
intenseɪntˈɛns
,
andˈænd
a
generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
sensesˈɛns
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
haven't
beenbˈiːn
sleepingslˈiːpɪŋ
inˈɪn
cloverklˈəʊvɐ
;
Butbˈʌt
theðə
darknessdˈɑːknəs
hashˈæz
passedpˈɑːst
,
andˈænd
it's
daylightdˈeɪlaɪt
atˈæt
lastlˈɑːst
,
andˈænd
theðə
nightnˈaɪt
hashˈæz
beenbˈiːn
longlˈɒŋ
—
dittodˈɪtəʊ
dittodˈɪtəʊ
mymˈaɪ
songsˈɒŋ
—
andˈænd
thankθˈæŋk
goodnessɡˈʊdnəs
they're
bothbˈəʊθ
ofˈɒv
themðˈɛm
overˈəʊvɐ
!
(Lord Chancellor falls exhausted on
LORD CHANCELLOR
a
seatsˈiːt
)
Enter Lords Mountararat and Tolloller
LORD MOUNTARARAT
I
aməm
muchmˈʌtʃ
distresseddɪstɹˈɛst
totˈuː
seesˈiː
yourjˈɔː
Lordshiplˈɔːdʃɪp
inˈɪn
thisðˈɪs
conditionkəndˈɪʃən
.
LORD CH.
Ahˈɑː
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
seldomsˈɛldəm
thatðˈæt
a
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
hashˈæz
reasonɹˈiːzən
totˈuː
envyˈɛnvi
theðə
positionpəzˈɪʃən
ofˈɒv
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
,
butbˈʌt
I
aməm
freefɹˈiː
totˈuː
confesskənfˈɛs
thatðˈæt
I
wouldwˈʊd
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
bebˈiː
twotˈuː
Earlsˈɜːlz
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
thanðˈɐn
anyˈɛni
otherˈʌðɐ
half-dozen
noblemennˈəʊbəlmˌɛn
uponəpˈɒn
theðə
facefˈeɪs
ofˈɒv
theðə
globeɡlˈəʊb
.
LORD TOLL.
(
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
enthusiasmɛnθjˈuːzɪˌæzəm
).
Yesjˈɛs
.
It's
anˈɐn
enviableˈɛnvɪəbəl
positionpəzˈɪʃən
whenwˈɛn
you're
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
onewˈɒn
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Ohˈəʊ
yesjˈɛs
,
nonəʊ
doubtdˈaʊt
—
mostmˈəʊst
enviableˈɛnvɪəbəl
.
Atˈæt
theðə
samesˈeɪm
timetˈaɪm
,
seeingsˈiːɪŋ
youjˈuː
thusðˈʌs
,
wewˈiː
naturallynˈætʃəɹəli
saysˈeɪ
totˈuː
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
,
"
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
veryvˈɛɹi
sadsˈæd
.
Hishˈɪz
Lordshiplˈɔːdʃɪp
isˈɪz
constitutionallykˌɒnstɪtjˈuːʃənəli
asəz
blitheblˈaɪð
asəz
a
birdbˈɜːd
—
heˈhiː
trillstɹˈɪlz
uponəpˈɒn
theðə
benchbˈɛntʃ
likelˈaɪk
a
thingθˈɪŋ
ofˈɒv
songsˈɒŋ
andˈænd
gladnessɡlˈædnəs
.
Hishˈɪz
seriessˈiəɹiz
ofˈɒv
judgementsdʒˈʌdʒmənts
inˈɪn
F
sharpʃˈɑːp
minormˈaɪnɐ
,
givenɡˈɪvən
andanteændˈɑːnteɪ
inˈɪn
six-eight
timetˈaɪm
,
areə(ɹ)
amongɐmˈʌŋ
theðə
mostmˈəʊst
remarkableɹɪmˈɑːkəbəl
effectsɪfˈɛkts
everˈɛvɐ
producedpɹədjˈuːst
inˈɪn
a
Courtkˈɔːt
ofˈɒv
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
.
Heˈhiː
isˈɪz
,
perhapspəhˈæps
,
theðə
onlyˈəʊnli
livinglˈɪvɪŋ
instanceˈɪnstəns
ofˈɒv
a
judgedʒˈʌdʒ
whosehˈuːz
decreesdɪkɹˈiːz
havehəv
receivedɹɪsˈiːvd
theðə
honourˈɒnɐ
ofˈɒv
a
doubledˈʌbəl
encoreˈɒnkɔː
.
Howhˈaʊ
cankˈæn
wewˈiː
bringbɹˈɪŋ
ourselvesaʊəsˈɛlvz
totˈuː
dodə
thatðˈæt
whichwˈɪtʃ
willwˈɪl
deprivedɪpɹˈaɪv
theðə
Courtkˈɔːt
ofˈɒv
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
ofˈɒv
onewˈɒn
ofˈɒv
itsˈɪts
mostmˈəʊst
attractiveɐtɹˈæktɪv
featuresfˈiːtʃəz
?"
LORD CH.
I
feelfˈiːl
theðə
forcefˈɔːs
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
remarksɹɪˈmɑɹks
,
butbˈʌt
I
aməm
herehˈiə
inˈɪn
twotˈuː
capacitieskəpˈæsɪtiz
,
andˈænd
theyðˈeɪ
clashklˈæʃ
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
theyðˈeɪ
clashklˈæʃ
!
I
deeplydˈiːpli
grieveɡɹˈiːv
totˈuː
saysˈeɪ
thatðˈæt
inˈɪn
decliningdɪklˈaɪnɪŋ
totˈuː
entertainˌɛntətˈeɪn
mymˈaɪ
lastlˈɑːst
applicationˌæplɪkˈeɪʃən
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
,
I
presumedpɹɪzjˈuːmd
totˈuː
addressəˈdɹɛs
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
inˈɪn
termstˈɜːmz
whichwˈɪtʃ
renderɹˈɛndɐ
itˈɪt
impossibleɪmpˈɒsəbəl
forfˈɔː
memˈiː
everˈɛvɐ
totˈuː
applyəˈplaɪ
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
againɐɡˈɛn
.
Itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
a
mostmˈəʊst
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
scenesˈiːn
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
—
mostmˈəʊst
painfulpˈeɪnfəl
!
LORD TOLL.
Thisðˈɪs
isˈɪz
whatwˈɒt
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
totˈuː
havehəv
twotˈuː
capacitieskəpˈæsɪtiz
!
Letlˈɛt
usˈʌs
bebˈiː
thankfulθˈæŋkfəl
thatðˈæt
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
personspˈɜːsənz
ofˈɒv
nonəʊ
capacitykəpˈæsɪti
whateverwɒtˈɛvɐ
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Comekˈʌm
,
comekˈʌm
.
Rememberɹɪmˈɛmbɐ
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
a
veryvˈɛɹi
justdʒˈʌst
andˈænd
kindlykˈaɪndli
oldˈəʊld
gentlemandʒˈɛntəlmən
,
andˈænd
youjˈuː
neednˈiːd
havehəv
nonəʊ
hesitationhˌɛsɪtˈeɪʃən
inˈɪn
approachingɐpɹˈəʊtʃɪŋ
yourselfjɔːsˈɛlf
,
sosˈəʊ
thatðˈæt
youjˈuː
dodə
sosˈəʊ
respectfullyɹɪspˈɛktfəli
andˈænd
withwˈɪð
a
properpɹˈɒpɐ
showʃˈəʊ
ofˈɒv
deferencedˈɛfɹəns
.
LORD CH.
Dodə
youjˈuː
reallyɹˈiəli
thinkθˈɪŋk
sosˈəʊ
?
LORD MOUNTARARAT
I
dodə
.
LORD CH.
Wellwˈɛl
,
I
willwˈɪl
nervenˈɜːv
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
totˈuː
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
effortˈɛfət
,
andˈænd
,
ifˈɪf
thatðˈæt
failsfˈeɪlz
,
I
resignɹɪˈzaɪn
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
totˈuː
mymˈaɪ
fatefˈeɪt
!
TRIOtɹˈiːəʊ
—
LORDlˈɔːd
CHANCELLORtʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
,
LORDSlˈɔːdz
MOUNTARARAT
andˈænd
TOLLOLLER
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
Ifˈɪf
youjˈuː
goɡˈəʊ
inˈɪn
You're
sureʃˈɔː
totˈuː
winwˈɪn
—
Yoursjˈɔːz
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
theðə
charmingtʃˈɑːmɪŋ
maidie
:
Bebˈiː
yourjˈɔː
lawlˈɔː
Theðə
ancientˈeɪnʃənt
sawsˈɔː
,
"
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!"
ALL
Nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!
Everyˈɛvɹi
journeydʒˈɜːni
hashˈæz
anˈɐn
endˈɛnd
—
Whenwˈɛn
atˈæt
theðə
worstwˈɜːst
affairsɐfˈeəz
willwˈɪl
mendmˈɛnd
—
Darkdˈɑːk
theðə
dawndˈɔːn
whenwˈɛn
daydˈeɪ
isˈɪz
nighnˈaɪ
—
Hustlehˈʌsəl
yourjˈɔː
horsehˈɔːs
andˈænd
don't
saysˈeɪ
diedˈaɪ
!
LORD TOLL.
Heˈhiː
whohˈuː
shiesʃˈaɪz
Atˈæt
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
prizepɹˈaɪz
Isˈɪz
notnˈɒt
worthwˈɜːθ
a
maravedimæɹəˈveɪdi
,
Bebˈiː
sosˈəʊ
kindkˈaɪnd
Totˈuː
bearbˈeə
inˈɪn
mindmˈaɪnd
—
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!
ALL
Nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!
Whilewˈaɪl
theðə
sunsˈʌn
shinesʃˈaɪnz
makemˈeɪk
yourjˈɔː
hayhˈeɪ
—
Wherewˈeə
a
willwˈɪl
isˈɪz
,
there's
a
waywˈeɪ
—
Beardbˈiəd
theðə
lionlˈaɪən
inˈɪn
hishˈɪz
lairlˈeə
—
Nonenʌn
butbˈʌt
theðə
bravebɹˈeɪv
deservedɪzˈɜːv
theðə
fairfˈeə
!
LORD CH.
I'll
taketˈeɪk
hearthˈɑːt
Andˈænd
makemˈeɪk
a
startstˈɑːt
—
Thoughðˈəʊ
I
fearfˈiə
theðə
prospect's
shadyʃˈeɪdi
—
Muchmˈʌtʃ
I'd
spendspˈɛnd
Totˈuː
gainɡˈeɪn
mymˈaɪ
endˈɛnd
—
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!
ALL
Nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
nevernˈɛvɐ
,
Faintfˈeɪnt
hearthˈɑːt
nevernˈɛvɐ
wonwʌn
fairfˈeə
ladylˈeɪdi
!
Nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
venturevˈɛntʃɐ
,
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
winwˈɪn
—
Bloodblˈʌd
isˈɪz
thickθˈɪk
,
butbˈʌt
water's
thinθˈɪn
—
Inˈɪn
forfˈɔː
a
pennypˈɛni
,
inˈɪn
forfˈɔː
a
poundpˈaʊnd
—
It's
Lovelˈʌv
thatðˈæt
makesmˈeɪks
theðə
worldwˈɜːld
goɡˈəʊ
roundɹˈaʊnd
!
(Dance, and exeunt arm-in-arm
ALL
togethertəɡˈɛðɐ
)
Enter Strephon, in very low spirits
[The following song was deleted from production]
ALL
Foldfˈəʊld
yourjˈɔː
flappingflˈæpɪŋ
wingswˈɪŋz
,
Soaringsˈɔːɹɪŋ
legislaturelˈɛdʒɪslətʃɐ
.
Stoopstˈuːp
totˈuː
littlelˈɪtəl
thingsθˈɪŋz
,
Stoopstˈuːp
totˈuː
humanhjˈuːmən
naturenˈeɪtʃɐ
.
Nevernˈɛvɐ
neednˈiːd
totˈuː
roamɹˈəʊm
membersmˈɛmbəz
patrioticpˌætɹɪˈɒtɪk
.
Let's
beginbɪɡˈɪn
atˈæt
homehˈəʊm
,
Crimekɹˈaɪm
isˈɪz
nonəʊ
exoticɛɡzˈɒtɪk
.
Bitterbˈɪtɐ
isˈɪz
yourjˈɔː
banebˈeɪn
Terribletˈɛɹəbəl
yourjˈɔː
trialstɹˈaɪəlz
Dingyˈdɪn.d͡ʒi
Drury
Lanelˈeɪn
Soaplessˈsoʊplɪs
Sevensˈɛvən
Dialsdˈaɪəlz
.
Take a tipsy lout
ALL
Gatheredɡˈæðəd
fromfɹˈɒm
theðə
gutterɡˈʌtɐ
,
Hustlehˈʌsəl
himhˈɪm
aboutɐbˈaʊt
,
Strapstɹˈæp
himhˈɪm
totˈuː
a
shutterʃˈʌtɐ
.
Whatwˈɒt
aməm
I
butbˈʌt
heˈhiː
,
Washedwˈɒʃt
atˈæt
hoursˈaʊəz
statedstˈeɪtɪd
.
Fedfˈɛd
onˈɒn
filagreeˈfɪl.ɪ.ɡɹiː
,
Clothedklˈəʊðd
andˈænd
educatedˈɛdʒuːkˌeɪtɪd
He's
a
markmˈɑːk
ofˈɒv
scornskˈɔːn
I
mightmˈaɪt
bebˈiː
anotherɐnˈʌðɐ
Ifˈɪf
I
hadhˈæd
beenbˈiːn
bornbˈɔːn
Ofˈɒv
a
tipsytˈɪpsi
motherˈmʌðə
.
Take a wretched thief,
ALL
Throughθɹˈuː
theðə
citysˈɪti
sneakingsnˈiːkɪŋ
.
Pocketpˈɒkɪt
handkerchiefhˈændkətʃˌiːf
Everˈɛvɐ
,
everˈɛvɐ
seekingsˈiːkɪŋ
.
Whatwˈɒt
isˈɪz
heˈhiː
butbˈʌt
I
Robbedɹˈɒbd
ofˈɒv
allˈɔːl
mymˈaɪ
chancestʃˈɑːnsɪz
Pickingpˈɪkɪŋ
pocketspˈɒkɪts
bybˈaɪ
forcefˈɔːs
ofˈɒv
circumstancessˈɜːkəmstˌænsɪz
I
mightmˈaɪt
bebˈiː
asəz
badbˈæd
,
Asəz
unluckyʌnlˈʌki
,
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
,
Ifˈɪf
I'd
onlyˈəʊnli
hadhˈæd
,
Faginˈfeɪɡɪn
forfˈɔː
a
fatherfˈɑːðɐ
.
STREPHON
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
onewˈɒn
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
enjoyɛndʒˈɔɪ
oneselfwɒnsˈɛlf
inˈɪn
Parliamentpˈɑːləmənt
,
whenwˈɛn
onewˈɒn
leadslɛdz
bothbˈəʊθ
Partiespˈɑːtɪz
,
asəz
I
dodə
!
Butbˈʌt
I'm
miserablemˈɪzɹəbəl
,
poorpˈɔː
,
broken-hearted
foolfˈuːl
thatðˈæt
I
aməm
!
Ohˈəʊ
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
,
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!—
Enter Phyllis
PHYLLIS
Yesjˈɛs
.
STREPHON
(
surprisedsəpɹˈaɪzd
).
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Butbˈʌt
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
I
shouldʃˈʊd
saysˈeɪ
"
Mymˈaɪ
Ladylˈeɪdi
.
"
I
havehəv
notnˈɒt
yetjˈɛt
beenbˈiːn
informedɪnfˈɔːmd
whichwˈɪtʃ
titletˈaɪtəl
yourjˈɔː
ladyshiplˈeɪdɪʃˌɪp
hashˈæz
pleasedplˈiːzd
totˈuː
selectsɪlˈɛkt
?
PHYLLIS
I
—
I
haven't
quitekwaɪt
decideddɪsˈaɪdɪd
.
Youjˈuː
seesˈiː
,
I
havehəv
nonəʊ
motherˈmʌðə
totˈuː
adviseɐdvˈaɪz
memˈiː
!
STREPHON
Nonəʊ
.
I
havehəv
.
PHYLLIS
Yesjˈɛs
;
a
youngjˈʌŋ
motherˈmʌðə
.
STREPHON
Notnˈɒt
veryvˈɛɹi
—
a
couplekˈʌpəl
ofˈɒv
centuriessˈɛntʃəɹɪz
orˈɔː
sosˈəʊ
.
PHYLLIS
Ohˈəʊ
!
Sheʃˈiː
wearswˈeəz
wellwˈɛl
.
STREPHON
Sheʃˈiː
doesdəz
.
She's
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
.
PHYLLIS
I
begbˈɛɡ
yourjˈɔː
pardonpˈɑːdən
—
a
whatwˈɒt
?
STREPHON
Ohˈəʊ
,
I've
nonəʊ
longerlˈɒŋɡɐ
anyˈɛni
reasonɹˈiːzən
totˈuː
concealkənsˈiːl
theðə
factfˈækt
—
she's
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
.
PHYLLIS
A
fairyfˈeəɹi
!
Wellwˈɛl
,
butbˈʌt
—
thatðˈæt
wouldwˈʊd
accountɐkˈaʊnt
forfˈɔː
a
goodɡˈʊd
manymˈɛni
thingsθˈɪŋz
!
Thenðˈɛn
—
I
supposesʌpˈəʊz
you're
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
?
STREPHON
I'm
halfhˈɑːf
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
.
PHYLLIS
Whichwˈɪtʃ
halfhˈɑːf
?
STREPHON
Theðə
upperˈʌpɐ
halfhˈɑːf
—
downdˈaʊn
totˈuː
theðə
waistcoatwˈeɪstkəʊt
.
PHYLLIS
Deardˈiə
memˈiː
!
(
Proddingpɹˈɒdɪŋ
himhˈɪm
withwˈɪð
herhˈɜː
fingersfˈɪŋɡəz
)
Thereðˈeə
isˈɪz
nothingnˈʌθɪŋ
totˈuː
showʃˈəʊ
itˈɪt
!
STREPHON
Don't
dodə
thatðˈæt
.
PHYLLIS
Butbˈʌt
whywˈaɪ
didn't
youjˈuː
telltˈɛl
memˈiː
thisðˈɪs
beforebɪfˈɔː
?
I thought you would take a dislike to me.
STREPHON
Butbˈʌt
asəz
it's
allˈɔːl
offˈɒf
,
youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
asəz
wellwˈɛl
knownˈəʊ
theðə
truthtɹˈuːθ
—
I'm
onlyˈəʊnli
halfhˈɑːf
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
!
PHYLLIS
(
cryingkɹˈaɪɪŋ
).
Butbˈʌt
I'd
ratherɹˈɑːðɐ
havehəv
halfhˈɑːf
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
I
dodə
lovelˈʌv
,
thanðˈɐn
halfhˈɑːf
a
dozendˈʌzən
I
don't
!
STREPHON
Ohˈəʊ
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
notnˈɒt
—
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
yourjˈɔː
half-dozen
.
PHYLLIS
(
cryingkɹˈaɪɪŋ
).
It's
onlyˈəʊnli
twotˈuː
!
andˈænd
I
hatehˈeɪt
'em
!
Pleaseplˈiːz
forgivefəɡˈɪv
memˈiː
!
STREPHON
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
I
oughtˈɔːt
totˈuː
.
Besidesbɪsˈaɪdz
,
allˈɔːl
sortssˈɔːts
ofˈɒv
difficultiesdˈɪfɪkˌʌltɪz
willwˈɪl
ariseɐɹˈaɪz
.
Youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
,
mymˈaɪ
grandmotherɡɹˈændmʌðɐ
lookslˈʊks
quitekwaɪt
asəz
youngjˈʌŋ
asəz
mymˈaɪ
motherˈmʌðə
.
Sosˈəʊ
dodə
allˈɔːl
mymˈaɪ
auntsˈɑːnts
.
PHYLLIS
I
quitekwaɪt
understandˌʌndəstˈænd
.
Whenever I see you kissing a very
PHYLLIS
youngjˈʌŋ
ladylˈeɪdi
,
I
shallʃˈæl
knownˈəʊ
it's
anˈɐn
elderlyˈɛldəli
relativeɹˈɛlətˌɪv
.
STREPHON
Youjˈuː
willwˈɪl
?
Thenðˈɛn
,
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
,
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
wewˈiː
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
veryvˈɛɹi
happyhˈæpi
!
(
Embracingɛmbɹˈeɪsɪŋ
herhˈɜː
)
PHYLLIS
Wewˈiː
won't
waitwˈeɪt
longlˈɒŋ
.
STREPHON
Nonəʊ
.
Wewˈiː
mightmˈaɪt
changetʃˈeɪndʒ
ourˈaʊə
mindsmˈaɪndz
.
We'll
getɡˈɛt
marriedmˈæɹɪd
firstfˈɜːst
.
PHYLLIS
Andˈænd
changetʃˈeɪndʒ
ourˈaʊə
mindsmˈaɪndz
afterwardsˈɑːftəwədz
?
STREPHON
That's
theðə
usualjˈuːʒuːəl
coursekˈɔːs
.
DUETdjuːˈɛt
—
STREPHON
andˈænd
PHYLLISˈfɪlɪs
.
Ifˈɪf
we're
weakwˈiːk
enoughɪnˈʌf
totˈuː
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Ereˈeə
wewˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
,
Youjˈuː
andˈænd
I
,
Ofˈɒv
theðə
feelingfˈiːlɪŋ
I
inspireɪnspˈaɪə
Youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
tiretˈaɪə
Bybˈaɪ
andˈænd
bybˈaɪ
.
Forfˈɔː
peerspɪɹz
withwˈɪð
flowingflˈəʊɪŋ
cofferskˈɒfəz
Presspɹˈɛs
theirðˈeə
offersˈɒfəz
—
Thatðˈæt
isˈɪz
whywˈaɪ
I
aməm
sureʃˈɔː
wewˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
notnˈɒt
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Ereˈeə
wewˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
,
Youjˈuː
andˈænd
I
!
PHYLLIS
Ifˈɪf
we're
weakwˈiːk
enoughɪnˈʌf
totˈuː
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Ereˈeə
wewˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
,
Youjˈuː
andˈænd
I
,
Withwˈɪð
a
moremˈɔː
attractiveɐtɹˈæktɪv
maidenmˈeɪdən
,
Jewel-laden
,
Youjˈuː
maymˈeɪ
flyflˈaɪ
.
Ifˈɪf
bybˈaɪ
chancetʃˈɑːns
wewˈiː
shouldʃˈʊd
bebˈiː
partedpˈɑːtɪd
,
Broken-hearted
I
shouldʃˈʊd
diedˈaɪ
—
Sosˈəʊ
I
thinkθˈɪŋk
wewˈiː
willwˈɪl
notnˈɒt
tarryˈtæ.ɹi
Ereˈeə
wewˈiː
marrymˈæɹi
,
Youjˈuː
andˈænd
I
.
Butbˈʌt
doesdəz
yourjˈɔː
motherˈmʌðə
knownˈəʊ
you're
—
I
meanmˈiːn
,
isˈɪz
sheʃˈiː
awareɐwˈeə
ofˈɒv
ourˈaʊə
engagementɛnɡˈeɪdʒmənt
?
Enter Iolanthe
IOLANTHE
Sheʃˈiː
isˈɪz
;
andˈænd
thusðˈʌs
sheʃˈiː
welcomeswˈɛlkʌmz
herhˈɜː
daughter-in-lawˈdɔːtə(ɹ)ɪnˌlɔː
!
Kisses her
PHYLLIS
Sheʃˈiː
kisseskˈɪsɪz
justdʒˈʌst
likelˈaɪk
otherˈʌðɐ
peoplepˈiːpəl
!
Butbˈʌt
theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
?
STREPHON
I
forgotfəɡˈɒt
himhˈɪm
!
Motherˈmʌðə
,
nonenʌn
cankˈæn
resistɹɪsˈɪst
yourjˈɔː
fairyfˈeəɹi
eloquenceˈɛləkwəns
;
youjˈuː
willwˈɪl
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
himhˈɪm
andˈænd
pleadplˈiːd
forfˈɔː
usˈʌs
?
IOLANTHE
(
muchmˈʌtʃ
agitatedˈædʒɪtˌeɪtɪd
).
Nonəʊ
,
nonəʊ
;
impossibleɪmpˈɒsəbəl
!
STREPHON
Butbˈʌt
ourˈaʊə
happinesshˈæpɪnəs
—
ourˈaʊə
veryvˈɛɹi
liveslɪvz
—
dependdɪpˈɛnd
uponəpˈɒn
ourˈaʊə
obtainingɒbtˈeɪnɪŋ
hishˈɪz
consentkənsˈɛnt
!
PHYLLIS
Ohˈəʊ
,
madammˈædəm
,
youjˈuː
cannotˈkænɒt
refuseˈɹɛfjuːs
totˈuː
dodə
thisðˈɪs
!
IOLANTHE
Youjˈuː
knownˈəʊ
notnˈɒt
whatwˈɒt
youjˈuː
askˈɑːsk
!
Theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
isˈɪz
—
mymˈaɪ
husbandhˈʌsbənd
!
STREPHON
andˈænd
PHYL
.
Yourjˈɔː
husbandhˈʌsbənd
!
IOLANTHE
Mymˈaɪ
husbandhˈʌsbənd
andˈænd
yourjˈɔː
fatherfˈɑːðɐ
!
(
Addressingɐdɹˈɛsɪŋ
Strephon
,
whohˈuː
isˈɪz
muchmˈʌtʃ
movedmˈuːvd
)
PHYLLIS
Thenðˈɛn
ourˈaʊə
coursekˈɔːs
isˈɪz
plainplˈeɪn
;
onˈɒn
hishˈɪz
learninglˈɜːnɪŋ
thatðˈæt
Strephon
isˈɪz
hishˈɪz
sonsˈʌn
,
allˈɔːl
objectionɒbdʒˈɛkʃən
totˈuː
ourˈaʊə
marriagemˈæɹɪdʒ
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
removedɹɪmˈuːvd
!
IOLANTHE
Nonəʊ
;
heˈhiː
mustmˈʌst
nevernˈɛvɐ
knownˈəʊ
!
Heˈhiː
believesbɪlˈiːvz
memˈiː
totˈuː
havehəv
dieddˈaɪd
childlesstʃˈaɪldləs
,
andˈænd
,
dearlydˈiəli
asəz
I
lovelˈʌv
himhˈɪm
,
I
aməm
boundbˈaʊnd
,
underˈʌndɐ
penaltypˈɛnəlti
ofˈɒv
deathdˈɛθ
,
notnˈɒt
totˈuː
undeceive
himhˈɪm
.
Butbˈʌt
seesˈiː
—
heˈhiː
comeskˈʌmz
!
Quickkwˈɪk
—
mymˈaɪ
veilvˈeɪl
!
(
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
veilsvˈeɪlz
herselfhɜːsˈɛlf
.
Strephon
andˈænd
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
goɡˈəʊ
offˈɒf
onˈɒn
tiptoetˈɪptəʊ
)
Enter Lord Chancellor
LORD CH.
Victoryvˈɪktəɹˌi
!
Victoryvˈɪktəɹˌi
!
Successsəksˈɛs
hashˈæz
crownedkɹˈaʊnd
mymˈaɪ
effortsˈɛfəts
,
andˈænd
I
maymˈeɪ
considerkənsˈɪdɐ
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
engagedɛnɡˈeɪdʒd
totˈuː
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
!
Atˈæt
firstfˈɜːst
I
wouldn't
hearhˈiə
ofˈɒv
itˈɪt
—
itˈɪt
waswˈɒz
outˈaʊt
ofˈɒv
theðə
questionkwˈɛstʃən
.
Butbˈʌt
I
tooktˈʊk
hearthˈɑːt
.
I
pointedpˈɔɪntɪd
outˈaʊt
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
thatðˈæt
I
waswˈɒz
nonəʊ
strangerstɹˈeɪndʒɐ
totˈuː
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
;
thatðˈæt
,
inˈɪn
point of fact, I had been personally acquainted with myself for
I
somesˈʌm
yearsjˈiəz
.
Thisðˈɪs
hadhˈæd
itsˈɪts
effectɪfˈɛkt
.
I
admittedɐdmˈɪtɪd
thatðˈæt
I
hadhˈæd
watchedwˈɒtʃt
mymˈaɪ
professionalpɹəfˈɛʃənəl
advancementɐdvˈænsmənt
withwˈɪð
considerablekənsˈɪdəɹəbəl
interestˈɪntɹəst
,
andˈænd
I
handsomelyhˈændsʌmli
addedˈædɪd
thatðˈæt
I
yieldedjˈiːldɪd
totˈuː
nonəʊ
onewˈɒn
inˈɪn
admirationˌædməɹˈeɪʃən
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
privatepɹˈaɪvət
andˈænd
professionalpɹəfˈɛʃənəl
virtuesvˈɜːtʃuːz
.
This was a great point gained.
I
I
thenðˈɛn
endeavouredɛndˈɛvəd
totˈuː
workwˈɜːk
uponəpˈɒn
mymˈaɪ
feelingsfˈiːlɪŋz
.
Conceivekənsˈiːv
mymˈaɪ
joydʒˈɔɪ
whenwˈɛn
I
distinctlydɪstˈɪŋktli
perceivedpəsˈiːvd
a
teartɛə
glisteningɡlˈɪsənɪŋ
inˈɪn
mymˈaɪ
ownˈəʊn
eyeˈaɪ
!
Eventuallyɪvˈɛntʃuːəli
,
afterˈɑːftɐ
a
severesɪvˈiə
strugglestɹˈʌɡəl
withwˈɪð
myselfmaɪsˈɛlf
,
I
reluctantlyɹɪlˈʌktəntli
—
mostmˈəʊst
reluctantlyɹɪlˈʌktəntli
—
consentedkənsˈɛntɪd
.
(
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
comeskˈʌmz
downdˈaʊn
veiledvˈeɪld
)
RECITATIVE—IOLANTHE (kneeling).
My lord, a suppliant at your feet I kneel,
I
Ohˈəʊ
,
listenlˈɪsən
totˈuː
a
mother's
fondfˈɒnd
appealɐpˈiːl
!
Hearhˈiə
memˈiː
to-nighttəˈnaɪt
!
I
comekˈʌm
inˈɪn
urgentˈɜːdʒənt
neednˈiːd
—
'Tis
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
sonsˈʌn
,
youngjˈʌŋ
Strephon
,
thatðˈæt
I
pleadplˈiːd
!
IOLANTHE
Heˈhiː
loveslˈʌvz
!
Ifˈɪf
inˈɪn
theðə
bygonebˈaɪɡɒn
yearsjˈiəz
Thineðˈaɪn
eyesˈaɪz
havehəv
everˈɛvɐ
shedʃˈɛd
Tearstɪɹz
—
bitterbˈɪtɐ
,
unavailing
tearstɪɹz
,
Forfˈɔː
onewˈɒn
untimelyʌntˈaɪmli
deaddˈɛd
—
Ifˈɪf
,
inˈɪn
theðə
eventideɪvˈɛntaɪd
ofˈɒv
lifelˈaɪf
,
Sadsˈæd
thoughtsθˈɔːts
ofˈɒv
herhˈɜː
ariseɐɹˈaɪz
,
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
theðə
memorymˈɛməɹˌi
ofˈɒv
thyðˈaɪ
wifewˈaɪf
Pleadplˈiːd
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
boybˈɔɪ
—
heˈhiː
diesdˈaɪz
!
Heˈhiː
diesdˈaɪz
!
Ifˈɪf
fondlyfˈɒndli
laidlˈeɪd
asideɐsˈaɪd
Inˈɪn
somesˈʌm
oldˈəʊld
cabinetkˈæbɪnət
,
Memorialsməmˈɔːɹɪəlz
ofˈɒv
thyðˈaɪ
long-dead
bridebɹˈaɪd
Lielˈaɪ
,
dearlydˈiəli
treasuredtɹˈɛʒəd
yetjˈɛt
,
Thenðˈɛn
letlˈɛt
herhˈɜː
hallowedhˈæləʊd
bridalbɹˈaɪdəl
dressdɹˈɛs
—
Herhˈɜː
littlelˈɪtəl
daintydˈeɪnti
glovesɡlˈʌvz
—
Herhˈɜː
witheredwˈɪðəd
flowersˈflaʊ.əz
—
herhˈɜː
fadedfˈeɪdɪd
tresstɹˈɛs
—
Pleadplˈiːd
forfˈɔː
mymˈaɪ
boybˈɔɪ
—
heˈhiː
loveslˈʌvz
!
(
Theðə
Lordlˈɔːd
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
isˈɪz
movedmˈuːvd
bybˈaɪ
thisðˈɪs
appealɐpˈiːl
.
Afterˈɑːftɐ
a
pausepˈɔːz
)
LORD CH.
Itˈɪt
maymˈeɪ
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
—
forfˈɔː
sosˈəʊ
theðə
fatesfˈeɪts
decidedɪsˈaɪd
!
Learnlˈɜːn
thouðaʊ
thatðˈæt
Phyllisˈfɪlɪs
isˈɪz
mymˈaɪ
promisedpɹˈɒmɪsd
bridebɹˈaɪd
.
IOLANTHE
(
inˈɪn
horrorhˈɒɹɐ
).
Thyðˈaɪ
bridebɹˈaɪd
!
Nonəʊ
!
nonəʊ
!
LORD CH.
Itˈɪt
shallʃˈæl
bebˈiː
sosˈəʊ
!
Thoseðˈəʊz
whohˈuː
wouldwˈʊd
separateˈsɛp.(ə.)ɹət
usˈʌs
woewˈəʊ
betidebɪtˈaɪd
!
IOLANTHE
Mymˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
thyðˈaɪ
lipslˈɪps
havehəv
spokenspˈəʊkən
—
I
pleadplˈiːd
inˈɪn
vainvˈeɪn
!
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
(
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
).
Forbearfɔːˈbɛə
!
forbearfɔːˈbɛə
!
A
vowvˈaʊ
alreadyɔːlɹˈɛdi
brokenbɹˈəʊkən
I
breakbɹˈeɪk
againɐɡˈɛn
!
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
(
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
).
Forbearfɔːˈbɛə
!
forbearfɔːˈbɛə
!
Forfˈɔː
himhˈɪm
—
forfˈɔː
herhˈɜː
—
forfˈɔː
theeðˈiː
I
yieldjˈiːld
mymˈaɪ
lifelˈaɪf
.
Beholdbɪhˈəʊld
—
itˈɪt
maymˈeɪ
notnˈɒt
bebˈiː
!
I
aməm
thyðˈaɪ
wifewˈaɪf
.
CHORUSkˈɔːɹəs
OFˈɒv
FAIRIESfˈeəɹɪz
(
withoutwɪðˈaʊt
).
Aiaiah
!
Aiaiah
!
Willaloo
!
LORD CH.
(
recognizingˈɹɛk.əɡˌnaɪ.zɪŋ
herhˈɜː
).
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
!
thouðaʊ
livestlˈaɪvst
?
IOLANTHE
Ayeeɪ
!
I
livelɪv
!
Nownˈaʊ
letlˈɛt
memˈiː
diedˈaɪ
!
(Enter Fairy Queen and Fairies.
Iolanthe kneels to her)
QUEEN
Oncewˈɒns
againɐɡˈɛn
thyðˈaɪ
vowsvˈaʊz
areə(ɹ)
brokenbɹˈəʊkən
:
Thouðaʊ
thyselfθaɪsˈɛlf
thyðˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
hasthˈeɪst
spokenspˈəʊkən
!
CHORUS OF FAIRIES
Aiaiah
!
Aiaiah
!
Willahalah
!
Willaloo
!
QUEEN
Bowbəʊ
thyðˈaɪ
headhˈɛd
totˈuː
Destinydˈɛstɪni
:
Deathdˈɛθ
thyðˈaɪ
doomdˈuːm
,
andˈænd
thouðaʊ
shaltʃˈælt
diedˈaɪ
!
CHORUS OF FAIRIES
Aiaiah
!
Aiaiah
!
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
(Peers and Sentry enter.
CHORUS OF FAIRIES
Theðə
Queenkwˈiːn
raisesɹˈeɪzɪz
herhˈɜː
spearspˈiə
)
LEILA
Holdhˈəʊld
!
Ifˈɪf
Iolantheˌaɪ.oʊˈlæn.θi
mustmˈʌst
diedˈaɪ
,
sosˈəʊ
mustmˈʌst
wewˈiː
allˈɔːl
;
forfˈɔː
,
asəz
sheʃˈiː
hashˈæz
sinnedsˈɪnd
,
sosˈəʊ
havehəv
wewˈiː
!
QUEEN
Whatwˈɒt
?
CELIA
Wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
allˈɔːl
fairyfˈeəɹi
duchessesdˈʌtʃɛsɪz
,
marchionessesˈmɑɹʃənɪs
,
countesseskˈaʊntɛsɪz
,
viscountessesˈvaɪkaʊntəs
,
andˈænd
baronessesbˈæɹəʊnəsɪz
.
LORD MOUNTARARAT
It's
ourˈaʊə
faultfˈɒlt
.
Theyðˈeɪ
couldn't
helphˈɛlp
themselvesðɛmsˈɛlvz
.
QUEEN
Itˈɪt
seemssˈiːmz
theyðˈeɪ
havehəv
helpedhˈɛlpt
themselvesðɛmsˈɛlvz
,
andˈænd
prettypɹˈɪti
freelyfɹˈiːli
,
tootˈuː
!
(
Afterˈɑːftɐ
a
pausepˈɔːz
)
Youjˈuː
havehəv
allˈɔːl
incurredɪnkˈɜːd
deathdˈɛθ
;
butbˈʌt
I
can't
slaughterslˈɔːtɐ
theðə
wholehˈəʊl
companykˈʌmpəni
!
Andˈænd
yetjˈɛt
(
unfoldingʌnfˈəʊldɪŋ
a
scrollskɹˈəʊl
)
theðə
lawlˈɔː
isˈɪz
clearklˈiə
—
everyˈɛvɹi
fairyfˈeəɹi
mustmˈʌst
diedˈaɪ
whohˈuː
marriesmˈæɹɪz
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
!
LORD CH.
Allowɐlˈaʊ
memˈiː
,
asəz
anˈɐn
oldˈəʊld
Equityˈɛkwɪti
draftsmanˈdɹɑːftsmən
,
totˈuː
makemˈeɪk
a
suggestionsədʒˈɛstʃən
.
Theðə
subtletiessˈʌtəltɪz
ofˈɒv
theðə
legallˈiːɡəl
mindmˈaɪnd
areə(ɹ)
equalˈiːkwəl
totˈuː
theðə
emergencyɪmˈɜːdʒənsi
.
Theðə
thingθˈɪŋ
isˈɪz
reallyɹˈiəli
quitekwaɪt
simplesˈɪmpəl
—
theðə
insertionɪnsˈɜːʃən
ofˈɒv
a
singlesˈɪŋɡəl
wordwˈɜːd
willwˈɪl
dodə
itˈɪt
.
Letlˈɛt
itˈɪt
standstˈænd
thatðˈæt
everyˈɛvɹi
fairyfˈeəɹi
shallʃˈæl
diedˈaɪ
whohˈuː
doesn't
marrymˈæɹi
a
mortalmˈɔːtəl
,
andˈænd
thereðˈeə
youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
,
outˈaʊt
ofˈɒv
yourjˈɔː
difficultydˈɪfɪkˌʌlti
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
!
QUEEN
Wewˈiː
likelˈaɪk
yourjˈɔː
humourhjˈuːmɐ
.
Veryvˈɛɹi
wellwˈɛl
!
(
Alteringˈɒltəɹɪŋ
theðə
MSˌɛmˈɛs
.
inˈɪn
pencilpˈɛnsəl
)
Privatepɹˈaɪvət
Willisˈwɪlɪs
!
SENTRYsˈɛntɹi
(
comingkˈʌmɪŋ
forwardfˈɔːwəd
).
Ma'am
!
Totˈuː
savesˈeɪv
mymˈaɪ
lifelˈaɪf
,
itˈɪt
isˈɪz
necessarynˈɛsəsəɹi
thatðˈæt
I
marrymˈæɹi
atˈæt
oncewˈɒns
.
Howhˈaʊ
shouldʃˈʊd
youjˈuː
likelˈaɪk
totˈuː
bebˈiː
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
guardsmanɡˈɑːdzmən
?
SENTRY
Wellwˈɛl
,
ma'am
,
I
don't
thinkθˈɪŋk
muchmˈʌtʃ
ofˈɒv
theðə
Britishˈbɹɪtɪʃ
soldiersˈəʊldʒɐ
whohˈuː
wouldn't
ill-convenience
himselfhɪmsˈɛlf
totˈuː
savesˈeɪv
a
femalefˈiːmeɪl
inˈɪn
distressdɪstɹˈɛs
.
QUEEN
Youjˈuː
areə(ɹ)
a
bravebɹˈeɪv
fellowfˈɛləʊ
.
You're
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
fromfɹˈɒm
thisðˈɪs
momentmˈəʊmənt
.
(
Wingswˈɪŋz
springspɹˈɪŋ
fromfɹˈɒm
Sentry's
shouldersʃˈəʊldəz
)
Andˈænd
youjˈuː
,
mymˈaɪ
Lordslˈɔːdz
,
howhˈaʊ
saysˈeɪ
youjˈuː
,
willwˈɪl
youjˈuː
joindʒˈɔɪn
ourˈaʊə
ranksɹˈæŋks
?
(Fairies kneel to Peers and implore them to
QUEEN
dodə
sosˈəʊ
)
Phyllis and Strephon enter
LORD MOUNTARARAT
(
totˈuː
Lordlˈɔːd
Tolloller
).
Wellwˈɛl
,
nownˈaʊ
thatðˈæt
theðə
Peerspɪɹz
areə(ɹ)
totˈuː
bebˈiː
recruitedɹɪkɹˈuːtɪd
entirelyɛntˈaɪəli
fromfɹˈɒm
personspˈɜːsənz
ofˈɒv
intelligenceɪntˈɛlɪdʒəns
,
I
reallyɹˈiəli
don't
seesˈiː
whatwˈɒt
usejuːs
wewˈiː
areə(ɹ)
,
downdˈaʊn
herehˈiə
,
dodə
youjˈuː
,
Tolloller
?
LORD TOLL.
Nonenʌn
whateverwɒtˈɛvɐ
.
QUEEN
Goodɡˈʊd
!
(
Wingswˈɪŋz
springspɹˈɪŋ
fromfɹˈɒm
shouldersʃˈəʊldəz
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
)
Thenðˈɛn
awayɐwˈeɪ
wewˈiː
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
Fairylandfˈeəɹɪlˌænd
.
PHYLLIS
Soonsˈuːn
asəz
wewˈiː
maymˈeɪ
,
Offˈɒf
andˈænd
awayɐwˈeɪ
!
We'll
commencekəmˈɛns
ourˈaʊə
journeydʒˈɜːni
airyˈeəɹi
—
Happyhˈæpi
areə(ɹ)
wewˈiː
—
Asəz
youjˈuː
cankˈæn
seesˈiː
,
Everyˈɛvɹi
onewˈɒn
isˈɪz
nownˈaʊ
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
!
ALL
Everyˈɛvɹi
,
everyˈɛvɹi
,
everyˈɛvɹi
,
Everyˈɛvɹi
onewˈɒn
isˈɪz
nownˈaʊ
a
fairyfˈeəɹi
!
IOLANTHE
,
QUEENkwˈiːn
,
Thoughðˈəʊ
asəz
a
generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
ruleɹˈuːl
wewˈiː
knownˈəʊ
andˈænd
PHYL
.
Twotˈuː
stringsstɹˈɪŋz
goɡˈəʊ
totˈuː
everyˈɛvɹi
bowbəʊ
,
Makemˈeɪk
upˈʌp
yourjˈɔː
mindsmˈaɪndz
thatðˈæt
griefɡɹˈiːf
'twill
bringbɹˈɪŋ
Ifˈɪf
you've
twotˈuː
beauxbˈəʊ
totˈuː
everyˈɛvɹi
stringstɹˈɪŋ
.
ALL
Thoughðˈəʊ
asəz
a
generaldʒˈɛnəɹəl
ruleɹˈuːl
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.
LORDCH
Upˈʌp
inˈɪn
theðə
skyskˈaɪ
,
Everˈɛvɐ
sosˈəʊ
highhˈaɪ
,
Pleasuresplˈɛʒəz
comekˈʌm
inˈɪn
endlessˈɛndləs
seriessˈiəɹiz
;
Wewˈiː
willwˈɪl
arrangeɐɹˈeɪndʒ
Happyhˈæpi
exchangeɛkstʃˈeɪndʒ
—
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
forfˈɔː
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Perispˈɛɹɪs
!
ALL
Perispˈɛɹɪs
,
Perispˈɛɹɪs
,
Perispˈɛɹɪs
,
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Peerspɪɹz
forfˈɔː
Househaʊs
ofˈɒv
Perispˈɛɹɪs
!
LORDS CH
,
Upˈʌp
inˈɪn
theðə
airˈeə
,
sky-high
,
sky-high
,
LORD MOUNTARARAT
,
Freefɹˈiː
fromfɹˈɒm
Wardswˈɔːdz
inˈɪn
Chancerytʃˈɑːnsəɹi
,
andˈænd
TOLLtˈəʊl
.
I
/
Heˈhiː
willwˈɪl
bebˈiː
surelyʃˈɔːli
happierhˈæpɪɐ
,
forfˈɔː
I'm
/
He's
suchsˈʌtʃ
a
susceptiblesəsˈɛptəbəl
Chancellortʃˈɑːnsɛlɐ
.
ALL
Upˈʌp
inˈɪn
theðə
airˈeə
,
etcˌɛt ˈsɛt(ə)ɹə
.